MetalSucks

“BAD MONKEYS!!!”

I swear to god, I’ve been woken up so many fuckin days round here by one of the fast-growing number of MetalNotSoGood staff members uncontrollably exclaiming the above, or a far grouchier expletive….for you see, we are always stepping in shit around here — how could you not when there are so many goddamn monkeys bouncing about, flinging all sorts of rancid poo at each other?

However, it is we who be the monkeys today, and here’s why: I recently made the sad discovery that we have never, ever, ever (never) written a single gosh darn post on the totally nutso and crazily unique seminal band Primus.

For shame!!

I was never a kill-dead-die-hard fan of these guys the way that so many became, but there was no denying the sheer talent and originality oozing from every song the band ever played.

Led by uber-bass-maniac Les Claypool, Primus skated a fascinating line between funk and metal, but ultimately there’s no real categorization to be made — the band has always had a sound unique unto themselves.

Clearly Primus sucks even more than metal does.

Dog will hunt…

PRIMUS – “John the Fisherman”, from Suck on This (1989)

PRIMUS – “Too Many Puppies”, from Frizzle Fry (1990)

PRIMUS – “Jerry Was A Race Car Driver”, from Sailing the Seas of Cheese (1991)

PRIMUS – “My Name Is Mud“, from Pork Soda (1993)

Note: the above tunes were some of the band’s more popular singles; to truly experience the insanity that is Primus, one must delve deep into the plasma pit that is each album…..don’t be scared!!!  You can take a leak right here.

Vids after the jumpjumpjumpjump.

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Holy shit. I wasn’t even out that late last night, but for some reason I am just so tired today that it feels like nothing is really happening. Am I really typing this? Did I really write something positive about Zakk Wylde? Can I please just go to sleep now? I’m just gonna go to sleep now.

Before I do, here’s some things that happened this week:

• We’re giving away a free download of Katatonia’s new song, “Forsaker.”
• We spoke to Hypocrisy’s Peter Tagtgren and Brian Cook from Russian Circles and These Arms Are Snakes.
• We checked out new releases from Slayer and Jesu.
• Otep Shamaya gives women in metal a good name – too bad she won’t be a woman much longer.
• Leaves’ Eyes singer Liv Kristine gives women in metal a bad name – or, at least, a silly one.

Alright, seriously, night-night time for Axl. I think Gary Suarez is going to the NYC Vader gig tomorrow; if anyone sees him there, give him a dead arm for me.

-AR

Last night Vince and I hit up the Trivium/Chimaira/Whitechapel/Dirge Within show at Irving Plaza here in NYC. I will never ever get sick of watching Chimaira live. They have a forty-five minute set on this tour, and they really make the most of it by basically segueing directly from one song to the next with a minimum of on-stage banter, presumably in order to allow a maximum of brutality. To top it off, the set-list was pretty much perfect – they played at least one or two songs from each of their albums (This Present Darkness excluded), and not always they song(s) you’d expect, either. Definitely go check ‘em out!

Here they are doing “Severed” at the Download Festival in 2007. They played this song last night and the pit just went insane – I think this has to be the heaviest track on Pass Out of Existence, no?

-AR

…MS Maniac Daisy May Tinklepants just pointed out to us that the cover art for their new album, Revisions, is awfully similar to the cover art for Throwdown’s new album, Deathless. The two are being released too closely together for me to think that one is ripping off the other (also, their respective music is so dissimilar that I wouldn’t be surprised if either band didn’t care for the other’s work), so let’s just call it serendipity.

And, while we’re on the topic, here’s Slayer’s video of “Eyes of the Insane,” which the reader known only as “Jimmy” pointed out was the precursor for both of these covers.

-AR

So unless you spent your summer someplace where there’s no internet or any way to get metal news, you should be aware that Zakk Wylde a) has been replaced by Firewind’s Gus G. as Ozzy’s new guitarist and b) got the news when Ozzy did an interview announcing he was parting ways from his longtime axe-slinger, because apparently Ozzy and Sharon are too chickenshit to actually pick up the phone and make a difficult call. And so it would be completely within reason for Zakk to have nothing but terrible things to say about all parties involved – in fact, I kinda expected him to do just that. This is the man, after all, who threatened to kill Dave Grohl just for writing some riffs for Ozzy, and who basically attacked a journalist who repeated a rumor that Wylde’s pal Mike “Metal Mets” Piazza might be a homosexual.

But Wylde is actually taking the news really well, or, at least, he’s putting on a good face. From a recent interview with MusicRadar.com (via Blabbermouth):

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Apparently 3 have an album out. The band “3.” You know, the band whose logo looks like a giant dong on its side. The album is called Revisions; it came out on October 27th, yet I’ve heard nary a peep about it in the U.S. press. No interviews, no features, no “album art revealed!” or “new track streaming!”, no music video; barely anything at all.

Considering that their last album End is Begun was widely praised and the band did a well-received run on Dream Theater’s Prog Nation tour (also w/ Opeth), I’m thinking something has to be up in the 3 camp. What up? My three (!) theories as to what’s going down:

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I’ve been aware since the release of The Ashes of the Wake that Metallica’s Kirk Hammett is a Lamb of God fan – Kirk was spotted at that album’s release show at the Roseland Ballroom here in NYC – and I’ve wondered in the past if he wasn’t responsible for LoG suddenly becoming a go-to support act for Metallica.

And, hey, lookit: the above screenshot was taken from Chris Adler’s Facebook page, and reveals that Hammet and Adler are now working together on… something.

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My piece on drum-triggering a few weeks back ruffled a few feathers and even prompted a defense from Eyal. But what about metal production as a whole? Cosmo Lee at Invisible Oranges just published his thoughts on the current state of metal production, and as usual he’s (mostly) spot on.

I agree with the general thesis Cosmo is putting forth, namely that different kinds of metal require different kinds of production. I’ve never understood people who frown upon anything that sounds polished — there’s a time and a place for big, loud, slick production, just as there’s a time and a place for raw, dry, dirty, band-in-a-room-jamming production. The right band for the right producer and mixer. The argument that spiffed up mixing makes bands sound fake holds no water; the minute you place a mic in front of an amp/drum/voice and record that sound, the mic and recording equipment fundamentally alter that sound. It then takes the finely-tuned skills of a mixer or producer to get the sound BACK to how it actually sounded in the room before the mic picked it up. Sure, there’s over-production too, and that’s a separate issue — I just think certain people are way too quick to cry foul on anything that sounds good (hey Iann Robinson!) when in fact certain situations/bands just warrant that kind of a sound.

Cosmo also points out that mixing and production are more important to fans of metal than fans of any other genre, and I wholeheartedly agree; we’re really fucking picky. There is one part of Cosmo’s piece though that I take issue with:

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Now that Animosity is done, I guess vocalist Leo Miller is occupying his time by working as a correspondent for Metal Injection – in which I case I can only say, “Hey, Leo, welcome to the family!” Any friend of MI’s is a friend of ours. Except for Sid. He doesn’t like Cynic so screw that dude.

ANYWAY, here’s Leo interviewing Converge. The best part actually comes later in the video, when Jacob Bannon high-jacks the interview and… well… just watch.

-AR

For the sake of this poor kid’s humility, I’m going to omit his name. But holy hell, this is funny!

At 9:18pm last night we received the following email:

To whom it may concern,

I just received some information personally from Tracy Sanders of Mastodon. He had privelidged me with the title of their upcoming album. From his words, he stated that I was the first person outside of the members and label who know this.
He also forwarded me here to see if you were interested in this information.

I would be happy to arrange any sharing of information if you are interested.

Thank you for your time and consideration. Hope to hear from you soon.

Sincerely,
[name omitted]

Gotta love that Tracy Sanders of Mastodon and his “privelidged” information! Also, the best part is that the guy included his phone number in case we wanted to call!

So, exactly 35 minutes later we get a follow-up from the same dude:

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Seems my post about Earache’s 360 deal with Gama Bomb has set off quite a controversy. It inspired The Blogronaut (aka Sacha Dunable) to write a lengthy missive about why he thinks 360 deals aren’t worth it for musicians. That article in turn inspired The Austerity Program’s Justin Foley to leave a doozy of a response in the comments. At the heart of the matter, it seems, is whether record labels really have any value to bands now that “getting the record in stores” isn’t an issue, and if they do have value, what it is. Justin’s comment is damn brilliant and more or less exactly how I would’ve responded, so I’ll just re-post the whole thing here and offer a brief addition afterwards. Here goes:

Labels will continue to offer a few things.

First, they’ll act as tastemakers. Given the lower barriers for entry [i.e. cheap recording rigs / Garageband. -Ed.], more and more people are saying “fuck it, I want to be in a band”. Even with the ease of sharing and finding out about new music, the signal to noise ratio is low enough that bands need help connecting with their intended audience. When people know that they like the music a label puts out, they’ll naturally pay attention to a new affiliated act.

Second, while it’s easier to market and record music, it is still more expensive and time consuming to do it right rather than just do it. Labels should develop the marketing expertise to know where to spend money on a particular act. Maybe your money isn’t best spent on a Metalsucks banner ad, maybe it is. How do you know? (Note: the “you” here isn’t directed at the post’s author.)

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Sure, Craig Goldy, you didn’t play guitar on Dio’s classic albums (Holy Diver, The Last In Line, Sacred Heart), and even decades later you remain in the shadow of Vivian Campbell. And yeah “I Could Have Been A Dreamer” doesn’t hold a candle to “Rainbow In The Dark”, but today is your birthday, Big Guy, and on behalf of all the MetalSucks maniacs I wish you a super duper day!

Don’t forget to send Craig some birthday tweets!

-GS

[Gary Suarez is a ward of the state. He usually manages the consistently off-topic No Yoko No. Say, why don't you follow him on Twitter?]

All I can say is: THIS IS FUCKING REAL.

Major, major props to Josh Jacobson for sending this in.

-AR

In Axl’s post the other day about chicks in metal who rule harder than Leaves Eyes’ Liv Kristine, he asked our readers to share their favorite metal bands with females… and only ONE of you mentioned the fantastic To-Mera from the UK (clap clap clap for “Choronzon”!). To-Mera easily smoke any of the weak bands you all posted; they’re progressive, they’re inventive, they’re talented, and their singer Julie Kiss is a gifted and unique talent.

To-Mera’s 2008 release Delusions actually received an “honorable mention” in my year-end favorites list for that year; the record is that good. And apparently they just released a new EP called Earthbound. I’ve seen little to no press about this EP which is a shame because I definitely would’ve written about it leading up to its release. Following some investigation, I’ve discovered that the band parted ways with Candlelight Records after Delusions which would explain the lack of promotion behind Earthbound. I haven’t heard Earthbound yet but To-Mera do have the new song “Arcane Solace” and an album teaser streaming on their MySpace page, both of which sound like a logical continuation of Delusions. Gonna go buy the new EP on Amazon now… back for more later. [UPDATE: Apparently Earthbound isn't available digitally. What the fuck?? It's 2009, dudes. You just lost a potential sale, To-Mera. BOO.]

-VN

I know that with the postponement of the latest round of Megadeth/Slayer Canadian tour dates it’s tempting to say that the Mustaine-Slayer feud has finally reached critical mass, but I don’t actually believe that; we’ve been hearing rumors that the tour would finally come to America some time next year, and I think this is a case of some people who don’t really like each other realizing there’s more money to be made if they can keep their shit together. Or, put more simply: I actually believe that Tom Araya is sick, and that’s why the dates were postponed.

Which is why I also believe the Blabbermouth-reported rumor that not only is the MegaSlayer tour coming to the States in February, but that it will feature Testament and High on Fire, as well.

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Says MS Maniac Michael Arose, “King Diamond always wakes me up in the morning.” Touche.

-VN

We’re extremely proud to present to you what in our humble opinions is the coolest young band tour of early 2010; The Metal As Art Tour, featuring Hypno5e, Revocation and The Binary Code. While every band on the bill is different from one another, each brings a unique, artistic sensibility to their own brand of metal and all are some of the most forward-thinking metal musicians out there; hence “Metal As Art.”

We’ve raved about Revocation and we’ve raved about The Binary Code. We’ve yet to see Hypno5e, who are traveling all the way from France for this tour; but what we’ve heard of their new record (still in the works) is extremely promising.

The tour kicks off in New York City on January 6th, winds its way out to the West Coast and then comes all the way back East, ending in Trenton, NJ on February 6th, the day before the Superbowl. We’ll have plenty of updates leading up to the tour and along the way. Full list of dates, cities and venues after the jump.

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Congrats to the winners of last week’s funny photo caption contest, each of whom will receive a dandy Dying Fetus CD in the mail for their troubles. The winning entries:

Harahune: “Mister Nugent was not sure how to react to seeing Mustaine. After all, he had hunted deer and boar but never jackasses.”

Richard Michael Christopher Hall: “Hello me, meet the old me.”

That thar is comedic brilliance. This week we’re giving away one prize package from Katatonia: their new CD Night is the New Day, a hoodie, a t-shirt and a poster. Yowza, that’s a lot of Katatonia swag! Just come up with a funny caption to the below photo, and it’s all yours.

Remember Disgorge, Mexico, that weird ass looking movie I was talking about that was directed by David Hall and inspired by the Fuck the Facts album of the same title? Well, our PLPs (platonic life partners) over at Metal Injection have debuted a clip from the film, and – not exactly shocking – it’s weirder than Nergal singing country music. Check it, yo:

The song is “Kelowna,” by the way. If you can’t figure the name of the band that recorded it or which album it appears on, well, then, congratulations – you are a ree-ree and you can now go collect some disabilities payments from the government.

-AR

I’m not entirely sure what a “frost hammer” is – it sounds like the name of a band I wouldn’t like, actually – but it’s apparently the title of a new High on Fire song. You can watch bootleg footage of it being played live below, courtesy Blabbermouth.

Meanwhile, Snakes for the Divine has been announced as the tentative title of HOF’s new album, which will be out on E1 next year. Greg Fidelman, who produced the new Slayer album and worked on Metallica’s Death Mehgnetic, is producing. HOF are doing that whole Dethklok/Mastodon tour right now – if you’ve yet to see Matt Pike shake his flabby shirtless body, definitely go check it out.

-AR