MATZAH METAL: THE TEN PLAGUES… METAL STYLEE
Monday, April 21st, 2008 at 2:18pm by Vince NeilsteinSo, for those of you who might not know any Jews (read: those of you outside New York City), this weekend marked the beginning of Passover, the Jewish holiday celebrating the exodus of the Jews from slavery in Egypt (for you Christians… you might recognize the story from the Exodus section of that neat little book called The Bible). As you contemplate not eating any bread for a week, we contemplate the 10 Plagues — those most metal of punishments doled by God unto the evil Egyptians — and their metal-inspired counterparts.
1. Blood: God transformed the water in the Nile River into a river of blood for 7 days, causing the death of fish and leaving the Egyptians with undrinkable water. This one is obvious: Slayer’s “Raining Blood”! Awesome live footage.
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2. Frogs: God created a swarm of frogs that came up out of the Nile river and covered the land of Egypt, infesting Egyptian houses. Toads aren’t quite Frogs, but the Toadies do it for me.
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Thanks to the illustrious “metalgf” for her help with these posts. Stay tuned for tomorrow’s plagues.
-VN
In case you didn’t know, Christians also recogonize Passover. Ya know, in an Old Testament kinda way.
And…I live far outside New York City (2565 miles by car), and I know not one but TWO Jews. And they’re actually good friends! No really, actually I do.
Been to Jerusalem, got free beer and shots from a Jewish bar owner because we support the same football team. Who says Jews are tight bastards? Wrong!
Also had my wicked way with a gorgeous Jewish chick in India (an Israeli one) who took me to a fetish club when I visited Tel Aviv.
Oh, and three Jewish kids drove me all the way from Tel Aviv to Haifa and then back to Jerusalem so we could go to a metal gig. Point blank refused any money for fuel or anything.
Jews rock :)
the 10 million Jews who live in Los Angeles county are pretty disappointed you forgot about them right about now.
Shit, I get Jewish holidays off at work and I’m not even Jewish…nor is my boss or anyone else at work.
That’s the Toadies? I only knew them from Possum Kingdom. This song is much more Clutch-like.