GET READY FOR THE WORST SUPERGROUP EVER
Wednesday, May 28th, 2008 at 5:56pm by Axl Rosenberg
So a couple of weeks ago Michael Anthony spilled that beans that he and former Van Halen cohort Sammy Hagar “are working on a new project with a couple of good friends.” At the time, I joked that perhaps they were teaming up with Slash, Duff McKagan and Matt Sorum to form Velvet Hagarevolver, a force more powerful than Voltron or, at the very least, Toto.
In point of fact, the reality is much, much worse.
Blabbermouth has now confirmed the rumor we’ve all been hearing from the get-go, which is that the other members of the group are Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith and Joe Satriani. And they’ve settled on the band moniker “Chickenfoot.”
Now, don’t get me wrong: Satch is a brilliant guitar player (and I imagine he was brought into the fold so no one would have to try and live up the memory of a certain former bandmate of Hagar and Anthony’s), and I don’t care much for RHCP these days, but Smith is a capable drummer.
But let’s be real: these guys are gonna make boring, corporate, middle aged rock that, if we’re very, very lucky, might be on par with some of Bon Jovi’s recent output (Hagar’s assertion that the band “could rival” Led Zeppelin makes me so fucking angry, I’m not even going to address it here, lest today be the day I finally suffer a massive aneurysm). Add to that the fact that they’ve come up with what I’m fairly certain is the worst band name, like, ever (were they trying to conjure images of some collaboration between present and past GN’R axemen Buckethead and Bumblefoot, or do they just really love Chinese food?), and my interest in this project just dropped to negative ten thousand.
God, just typing about this band makes me sleepy. I wonder if getting really plastered on Cabo and then listening to the last Audioslave album will somehow make Chickenfoot seem like a worthwhile endeavor.
Probably not.
-AR
This sucks more than anything that has ever sucked before. At least Flea isn’t in the band. -shudders-
You don’t think Hagar was joking through the use of hyperbole? C’mon Axl, you can’t possibly be that dense (or stoned) to take that as a literal belief.
Who knows, maybe Hagar’s influence will tame the over-the-top shredding instincts of Satch.
What probably will result is a tepid, fun album with a couple of good songs, a couple of dreadful ballads and themes of partying throughout.
There could be worse – lots worse – “super” group amalgamations. Hell, two years ago we had Rockstar Supernova.
Did anyones else immediately set that photo as their desktop background?
*crickets…*
Satch! Why~!?
Oh yeah, for the money, huh. Silly question forget I asked it.
Listen, let’s just pretend that this isn’t happening. I promise I won’t read any more stories about this if you promise to write of this no more. I never happened. Forget!
I’m with Hibernum.
are u fuckin kiddin me?!
there could be way worse bands…maybe less mis-matched ones but still way worse.
obligatory “Savage Animal!” post.
Very good take on this. It’s all bullshit.
Satriani sucks, guys. There, I said it. Hate me now? Petrucci is talking to him in those YouTube videos with the deep voice, I’ll have you all know.
[...] and Michael Anthony will jam with Joe Satriani and RHCP-drummer Chad Smith in the new supergroup Chickenfoot. Hagar proclaims it’ll be on the level of Led Zeppelin. Axl takes him [...]
[...] But the difference is that Crystal Clear Pepsi didn’t want to overturn Roe V. Wade, didn’t accept an endorsement from the worst president in American history, and was generally not capable of causing any actual problems for anyone who didn’t go out of their way to purchase it. Hagar’s attitude that anyone can use the song so long as they’re running for office demonstrates the same kind of vacuity that led to the formation of Chickenfuck. [...]