BRIAN “HEAD” WELCH GIVES US MORE REASONS TO LAUGH WITH NEW ALBUM

What could possibly be funnier than the fact that Korn guitarist-turned-Jesus-freak Brian “Head” Welch is releasing a solo album this September? Oh, lots and lots of things. For instance:

1. The Jesus-themed artwork adorning his MySpace page (including but not limited to the tattooed cross on his cheek).
2. This sentence, taken from his bio, describing Korn: “The band was credited with being the major influence in the rise of the New metal movement.” Things that are funny about this:
   1. The emphasis of “the.”
   2. The fact that this is boasted as a good thing.
   3. Use of “New” instead of “Nu,” and the capitalization thereof.
3. The high school diary-like lyrics of his new song “Flush.” Really, you have to listen to believe it.
4. Did I mention the lyrics?
5. White-boy dreads in 2008.
6. The fact that we’re probably giving him a traffic boost by writing this article.
7. Etc.

What? You mean this wasn’t supposed to be a joke? Oops, my bad. But then again, neither was Korn.

-VN