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What the fuck??

METALLICA’S DEATH MAGNETIC ARTWORK LOOKS JUST LIKE A VAGINA

 Thursday, July 17th, 2008 at 2:51pm by

metallica - death magnetic

I mean, come on. There is no WAY this thing got through several rounds of drafts, approvals, and record company folk without anyone noticing. I mean, seriously?? It’s a giant pussy (insert joke about Kirk Hammet here), complete with pubic hair. Even more so than In Flames’ blatantly psycho-sexual A Sense of Purpose album cover. Just what are Metallica trying to say here?

-VN

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  • Jim

    One cunt isn’t enough for that album cover, there should be 4.

  • vance almighty

    christ, it’s not that bad.

  • Kye

    I like it better than any album cover they’ve had before

  • http://www.myspace.com/jay234t Jason

    Bwahahahahahaha can’t hahahahaha stop hahahahaha LAUGHING HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

  • Carlos

    They should have hired Pushead to draw some skulls with acid stains on them. If Lars was to cheap for that, they should have just hired John Baizley to do his version of the Pushead skulls.

  • jaime

    pushead did the artwork to st. anger, so lets not go sucking him off here. also, funniest headline ever.

  • DeathMetalDave

    Yeah, the lines kinda look like pubes. However, and I’m sure others have noticed, it looks like a magnetosphere. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magnetosphere. So it’s not a cunt with pubes, it’s the Magnetic Death Cunt, complete with magnetosphere.

  • Jim

    Magnetic Death Cunt would be an excellent album name.

  • 3D

    # jaime Says:
    July 17th, 2008 at 3:21 pm

    pushead did the artwork to st. anger, so lets not go sucking him off here.

    There was nothing wrong with the artwork for St. Anger… I liked it. It was the music inside that was a turd.

    Hopefully this album will be a 180 of that.

  • Andres

    Wow…

    Lmao.

    There are no words.

    Its not THAT bad…but not something that would catch my eye at a store…like say, Megadeth’s United Abominations cover.

    Needless to say, who cares. Its about the music.

  • michael

    This journalist writing this is soooo gay, and such an asshole..the album cover is awesome and so is metallica…yeah theyve had a bad album or two but who cares..Metallica at its best is better than any metall out there. Saw them yesterday, insane show best one ive ever been to. and dont make funn of kirk he is way more awesome, talented, and NOT a pussy then you are!!

  • http://www.coreymitchell.com Corey Mitchell

    Pussy circa 1980 maybe …

  • DeathMetalDave

    Yeah Vince…you’re gay. Do your parents know?

  • In All Seriousness

    Um.. it actually looks like my ass hole.

    Yeah, I looked at it in the mirror, you wanna fight about it?

  • Sammy

    They had an album cover with semen, so why not a semen receptacle? Natural progression, eh?

  • Andres

    Michael…

    Metallica is my favorite band. But seriously? THE best band out there today???
    Not even close. There are so many more talented and original bands out there today. Metallica is my favorite because of emotional attachment I guess…but they dont come close to touching the amazingness that comes out of the Finnish/Scandinavian area today.

    Not even close.

  • http://www.myspace.com/miksha Fritz!

    So i guess when you by the album you must have a key shaped penis (or a corpse shaped, depends on how you look at it) to open it. And if you’re package don’t fit; well, the only way to go is buying the ultra overpriced digital version!! Now that’s what i call a business plan!!

  • http://www.myspace.com/divinationmetal thedoomsdaybroadcast

    well, this doesn’t really surprise me considering one of the first releases of “sneak peek” of the new logo looked like an electronic anus. a big, fat hairy vagina does not surprise me… though i am leaning towards the idea that they are telling everyone, “this is what your asshole will look like after we rape for buying this piece of crap… AGAIN”

  • amy

    whether or not metallica sucks doesn’t change that there’s a big hairy vagina on the cover of their album.

  • rip

    Once again, Vince N. is a pussy. And clearly a pussy that doesn’t get any pussy if he thinks this looks like a pussy. It looks like a coffin in a coffin-shaped grave, in a magnetic field. OH, THAT’S WHAT IT IS!

  • Ben

    Amy…that settles it. Best comment yet.

  • Dude Manbro

    It is nice to see they’re trotting out the old, superior logo again. That fact, along with the word “death” in the album title, might convince the more gullible among us that Metallica is indeed “back”. But as soon as the album drops it will be obvious that they’re the same shitty, washed-up band that plopped out turds like those “Load” things, “St. Anguish” & those awful symphony & cover albums. Metallica is second only to Kiss in the Rock N Roll Sellout Hall Of Fame (Kiss retired the no.1 spot years ago) & no amount of hope or wishful thinking will ever change that. If the new album was really any good they wouldn’t deem it necessary to resort to gimmicky packaging to generate interest, they’d leak a bit of it & the music would speak for itself. What little I’ve heard of it has spoken & what it said was “we suck & we barely pretend to even try anymore”.

    Nope, Metalli-bashing never gets old. Fuck them.

  • amy

    plus it’s so obvious. the album’s called Death Magnetic, and on the cover there’s death (represented by a coffin) and magnetic (represented by pubey filings). it’s like Rush’s Snakes & Arrows, which has like a half-dozen images of (you guessed it) snakes and arrows.

  • Ridiculous

    This blog has seriously lost its talent

  • Andres

    Umm….I’m pretty sure they used their original logo in St. Anger as well…

  • RaZZo

    I just wanna start this rant by saying ONE WORD:
    GOATSE!
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goatse.cx

    hahahahahah!

    Uh yes. It’s a magnetosphere. We got that.
    We got that in 2nd grade science class….
    Kudos to Metallica for being as “deep” as a 7-year old.

    How the album got named in 1 Act:
    Probably went something like this:
    M#1: “Dudes! NO! I’m serious!!! Just think about it for a second: “Death Magnetic”! It sounds could right?”
    M#2: “But what the fuck does it mean?”
    M#1: “That’s just it! It’s, like…mysterious…n’….poetic….or some shit.”
    M#2: “Okay, Okay I see now! Awesome! The album cover could show like..uh…a MAGNET!”
    M#1: “Dude! fuck yeah! That’s awesome?”
    M#2: “Like…a COFFIN-SHAPED MAGNET! Like, cuz of the “Death” part!”
    M#1: “YEah!!! Fuck yeah! But wait! Then how will people know it’s a magnet?”
    M#2: “Shit! SHIT!!! Wait, my kid just did a science project for a school fair…well, not my kid, he just made an ashtray in shop…but this OTHER KID he knows…did this magnet trick with some iron shavings! We could use that! Then it’ll be like, “scientific” on top of “deep and mysterious”
    M#1: “Awesome!”
    M#2: “Fuck Yeah!”
    (high-five each other)

    But, It still looks like a BIG 1970′s Playboy-GROOVEMUFF!!!

    It also looks like an anus with a coffin shoved into it…
    Take your pick!

    Should be called DEATH VAGnetic!

  • Dude Manbro

    Re: Andres – on “St. Whatever” I think they used a kind of bastardized combination of both logos. If I am wrong, I stand corrected.

  • kevin

    you know if the article was positive about the artwork, you would all be talking about how much you liked it.

    I am not saying its great but its certainly not as bad as you tools are pretending it is.

  • http://westofmars.blogspot.com Susan Helene Gottfried

    Vince, you are truly my hero for coming out and saying so eloquently what so many others were thinking.

    Please excuse me while I go get waxed…

  • cj

    LOL. How the hell did they get by with that? Are they trying to make it more underground?

  • miguel_g(Peru)

    Well, as an engineering student, I would say it’s pretty clever in an ankward way (a coffin resembling a magnet, with the magnetic field coming out from the north pole of the magnet, in this case, the coffin). Anything from pushead would had been better, through. St.Anger artwork was badass. And it’s true, it looks like a pussy….but there’s two things that I like there: Metallica and pussy, so it’s a winner!

  • chris

    i think it looks more like a butthole lol

  • http://www.coreymitchell.com Corey Mitchell

    After all the chatter about hairy vages and sperm I decided to take another look at the artwork for St. Anger. Damn if it doesn’t look like a fiery red fist in bondage that has recently been extracted from an oversized asshole. I guess a pussy coffin is rather tame in comparison to ultra-anal fisting.

    Oh, how I wish Cliff Burton were still alive so he could smack some sense into these jokers.

  • http://www.sithomeandrot.com/celebs/ manny

    It’s either a pussy with a severe case of SSA going on below or it’s a stink star eitherway ready to be ripped on.

    Off to a good start, Metallica.

  • http://www.pro-jikts.com Nickmeister

    I like it, actually. I didn’t think it looked like a pussy until I read the headline. To be honest, I think you’re giving Metallica a bit too much shit. On the other hand it is kinda funny that it does look like a pussy… But nonetheless, it’s cool, clean, and to the point.

  • Dan

    Please go back to your XBOX and play Guitar Hero, none of you douche bags on here are qualified to talk shit. congrats for having an opinion.

  • MoeSizzpew

    METALLICUNT!!!!!!!

  • RaZZo

    uh…. I thought unqualified shit-talking was the WHOLE FUCKING POINT of this website….

  • HLKid

    AHHAAAHHH wow…
    So I guess that all of you have never seen a vag.
    And if you have and it looked like that………
    well then.
    It doesn’t look like a vag at all… Dumb asses

  • Sam

    Personally i love it!
    And for anyone who thinks a sunken grave looks like a vagina, ive got one word for you…

    Necrophobic

  • Sam

    Necrophobic?

    Sorry i mean Necrophiliac, people obviously arent a Swedish death metal band

  • HLKid

    agreed.
    you’re like the only smart person on here.

  • Anthony

    If only this was a ‘write a caption’ picture…

    “Brings a whole new meaning to PUSSY MAGNET”.

    :P

  • LionofKnowlegde

    Apparently the writer of this article has never seen a real vagina in his life. And I am willing to bet you spank it to this pic too! How old are you really? 16? Or the 30 year old virgin?

  • HLKid

    Even if he was older than 16 and not a virgin ……

    Probably doesn’t have google…

  • RaZZo

    Well, now I can die happy.
    I’ve been quoted in the site Masthead!

    I’ve seen plenty of real vagina.
    I’ve seen plenty of Georgia O’Keefe paintings.

    That shit looks vaginal.
    Or at the very least, “genital-ish”.

    Squint a little. it’ll come to you like a magic-eye picture.

    Caption should be:
    “Hey, Dude. I think your dog swallowed your Misfits Boxset case.”

  • HLKid

    RaZZo: Caption should be: … is not funny at all.

  • RaZZo

    goatse

  • HLKid

    What the fuck?

  • Satan

    hey there’s a band called Deathstars….
    if you see the Death Magnetic font its like the Deathstars logo !
    ….in the tracklist of the Death Magnetic Album there’s a track called Cyanide
    …Deathstar’s have an old track called Cyanide!…

  • Shmee

    God, I’d hate to see who has that as a pussy or better yet who actually got into this woman’s pants. VN, you need to stay away from the Skanks in alleys.

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  • thrashman666

    wow whoever thought of this is obviously a dull minded fuck. and metallica will always and forever be one of the best bands ever formed.

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    • Some Random Dude

      fo reezy dawg

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