“Stop! Hellhammer time”

And here we see Gaahl hitting it up at a nightclub, attempting to two-step.

Ja Dieter,dees metal-danschen-pantsen are so kvlt! I know dat purple dont look very metal, but i made them out of mein leftover tent from das wacken metal fest!

Wanting to get in on the “beardo” fad, Vince perhaps chooses the wrong venue to show off his dance moves.

I second that

‘My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard…”

Oh! The sweet sounds of De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas just make me wanna pop n’ lock.

Clearly, Varg forgot to include this man in his “Eviler than me” list.

What happens when Napoleon Dynamite and MC Hammer ever opened a dance club…

As you can see, Winds of Plague shows get crazy!

As you all know, Vanilla Ice just released his new Ross Robinson-produced album.

in the new breed of hardcore dancers we have taken a cross between richard simmons Necromancer anda splash of thuggin fresh

“Now strutting his stuff is Herman the Impaler from ‘America’s Next top Metal’”

This dude proves that even Black Metal bands sell out. I mean, come on, who doesn’t love a little bling?

White Mc Hammer Spotted at a metal show

GAYHEM!

“Blabbermouth reported excitedly today that Stone Temple Pilots are BACK!”

Vanilla Ice’s foray into the realm of black metal ended three weeks later under less than favorable circumstances (all three members of Watain took turns shitting down his esophagus; Vanilla commented later, “I don’t know WHAT color those mother-fuckers were yo, but I’m browner than ever before… on the inside).

despite all of johnny efforts to fit in at a dark funeral show his ufo pants were a dead give away that he still had nu metal in his heart

Who would have thought Disturb’s latest hidden cover track of “Frankie goes to Hollywood’s :Relax Do not do it” would feel so right on the dance floor? Can someone say cross-over hit!

“Stop; Collaborate and listen, Ice is back with a brand new invention”–breakin black metal.

This guy doesn’t need to “pick up the change” as he two steps; he’s already got his bling bling.

and on this fateful eve, the Juggalos got SERVED.

I KNOW THAT FUCKIN’ GUY!

Todd tragically realized moments later that crunking at a metal show just isn’t cool.
or …

The Mayhem enthusiasts waited patiently for Todd to finish “busting a move” before busting his legs.

……then Great White hit the stage and his pants wernt the only things that were flaming

And here we see Fabio wearing the latest addition to the Gaahl-DeVero kvlt couture fall line, and it seems purple really is the new black this year.

shit, I Ment to write, In honor of the late singer Dead, I just sniffed a bitchload of Dead Crows and now its…………ITS PURE FUCKING HELLHAMMERGEDON!

the mosh pit dies down as someone begins to actually dance.

“Mayhem 2: Electric Boogaloo”

…rap metal?

Once again, Willie “grabass” Baginsky touches one package too many bringing the mosh pit to a grinding, homophobic halt.

Once again, poor Corey misunderstands the term “Black Metal”.

Vince finally gets to show off his skills as the sub-genre of “disco-metal” is born with Avenged Sevenfold’s latest album.

Pridecore, just another gay subgenre to add to the list.

Due to the lack of long hair, the poor fellow had to borrow his friend’s bling in order to windmill.

While Conan O’Brien has long sought to distance himself from his younger brother, MC Hammerfall, the family “string dance” gives their kinship away every time.

…and the crowd gazed upon larz ulrich as he tried to devour the dollar symbol they’d cleverly placed around his neck as he bounded and twirled in his new pants made from the broken dreams of hundreds of gen x metal heads, blissfully unaware that he could use his hands for anything other than air-drumming to Trivium’s “The Crusade”.

“Come on, Satan, let’s do the twist!”

If you’re happy and you know then you’re face will surely show it…

And the long battle for Coolest Kid in Northwest Columbus High School was over.

“Got my Bling, Got my Mayhem, and I gotta keep it fresh with my crazy pants!”

Pit at the pink metal show for GAYHEM!!!!!

Looks like 2Pac really is dead, and he’s helping Satan enforce a new dress code.

hmmm… it’s probably better to not publicly announce that you’re gay. but hey gaahl just did it so for that reason this guy’s totally comfortable showing people that you can slamdance the YMCA. look, he’s about to put up “C”.

This is Jimmy…moments before he was stabbed by Varg.

after grimmace left mcdonalds, he tried everything to fit in with someone

With Gaahl’s brave coming-out, more and more Metal fans have migrated out of the closet.

Criss Angel is gonna be soooooo jealous when he sees my ‘invisible-string-elevating-gold-chain’ trick…I AM THE GREATEST DAMN MAGICKIAN OF ALL TIME!!!

Why Varg stabbed Euronymous.

Inspired the scene for Grandma’s Boy

‘Oooh, baby, baby
Baby, baby

Ah, push it – push it good
Ah, push it – push it real good’

Proof that the “suicide” of Dead was just a publicity stunt. He’s as alive as Elvis and Kaufman.

The case is finally made to release Varg as his work is clearly not finished.

“Fuck me, I forgot how to moonwalk”

Go Ninja, Go Ninja, Go!

Jeff was just trying to show everyone that even black metal and hip-hop can coexist as one.

this is what happened the day when the new kids on tha block reunion was planned on the same day as a metal concert at the concert hall.

penis: “I know i’m small but must you stare at me in public, and give mc hammer his pants back”

Jeff:” Oh yea moms making tacos tonight…I cant Wait!!!!!”

::News Caster Tone:: Today in music news moshers everywhere were startled when at a Mayhem show they were instructed to “Do The Hustle.” A select few people have embraced the bands new direction.

Coexisting has never been so metal!

Dont you wish your boyfriend was hot like me!

“hah! they’ll never guess im a narc…”

Bling Bling – $25
Purple Pants – $15
Caught in the act of dancing with them on – Priceless

Nothing says church burning like “U Can’t Touch This” and Wal Mart vending machine dolla bill ice on the neck.

WORD!

“They said that if i was the backup dancer for one show they’d let me play bass in the band…”

“As soon as my pants heat up, it’s popcorn for everyone!”

aw man who let my dad leave the house again =(

YOU SEEN THESE MOVES?!?!?

Dancing: When mugging a clown for your personal drag just isn’t metal enough…

Hip-Hop Metal = Epic Dance Off.

Who says you can’t do the electric slide at a metal show?

One Man.
One Pair Of Shiny Purple Pants

VIVA LA REVOLUTION

in the crowd,a proud mother shed a single tear as little timmy finally fulfilled a childhood dream.

the REAL Little Nicky

I need youuuuu crank that Dimmu Borgir. Decapitate dat hooooo!

*internal thought* Ok ok, left, right, left, left, right……shit, what was I supposed to do with my hands again? Damnit, Diddy is gonna kill me for this.

Off screen, the world’s strongest magnet.

Girl…you know I like my beat down low.

Apparently jimmy was the only person that thought “Sweatin’ To The Death Metal Oldies” was a good idea.

*thinking to himself* “Don’t mess up, Don’t mess up, they think you’re cool, don’t mess up, YES, I AM COOL!, Don’t mess up”

Andy’s mom let him out of the house the very first time for a metal concert. All the knowledge he had about the outside world came from early MTV music videos and old headbanger’s ball tapes his drunken father recorded on the betamax.

Time to Awaken The One Eyed – One Nosed – Purple People Eater!

after he fiance left with his car, all his stuff, and most of his dignity to run off to Hawaii with her chiropractor and left him with a squirming STD, the only thing he had left was his disco pants and his love of rave music.

(keep dancing…. keep dancing.. the trend will catch on eventually, then everyone will want to be a bling bling purple pants black metal loving dancer… a FAGCORE kid)