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Cinemetal

IF YOU STAB YOURSELF IN THE EYES AND EARS, THE NEW METALLICA VIDEO IS ACTUALLY PRETTY ENJOYABLE

 Tuesday, September 2nd, 2008 at 11:12am by

Back when the video for “One” came out, it seemed like Metallica had an understanding – and fear – of the horrors of war. That clip might’ve been heavy-handed, but it felt like a legitimate political statement, as well a visual expression of the song.

The band’s new video for “The Dick that Never Came,” on the other hand, just feels exploitative – like one of those propaganda videos Kid Rock is currently starring in for the National Guard.

So here’s the Metallica video… as a bonus, check out the recockulous Kid Rock/National Guard appeal to white trash who see some connection between NASCAR and Iraq after the jump.

-AR

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  • Ryan

    I’m about as big a Metallica fan as there is, but this video is just plain awful. The only highlight of the video was seeing Kirk playing the Flying V again.

    As for the rest… an explosion thats not an explosion, conflict that isn’t conflict, a climax that’s not a climax. I would like to see if there was anything on the cutting room floor that could have made this video feel exciting, or at least not stillborn.

    I’m tired of seeing well-produced and well-written films about the war, its just been flogged to death.

    For those who dig Metallica, at least the album is out soon. For those who dont, this is just another log on the fire.

  • http://www.myspace.com/grownfromthecold Luke

    Goddammit Metallica. Just…goddammit.

  • http://www.myspace.com/discipleoftorment Rohit

    I love the part in kid rock video where the kid chases the soccer ball into the front of the Humvee and it stops for the kid.

    If that was a real metal video, the Humvee would’ve ran the kid over. And then the video would’ve actually been kind of enjoyable.

  • bucketochicken

    Music videos suck.

  • RayRay

    This album needs to come out so we can finally put all the Metallica debates to rest. This video stinks though

  • Sammy

    Watching music videos is a complete waste of time.

  • TedTedPoleyPoley

    i thought i was watching a deleted scene from the upcoming “Iron Man” Blu-Ray release there for a second, ho hum…

    as far as Nascar & Iraq, i dunno. on one, you got people going round in circles heading nowhere while being cheered on by diehard white trash supporters who don’t take no for an answer, while at the end of the day, the corporate sponsors are the one that are making profits from the whole debacle. and then on the other, you have Nascar…. :-P

  • http://www.myspace.com/theabsence Patrick Pintavalle

    I remember when people looked down on you for listening to Metallica. Does anyone remember those days? I used to get kicked out of school for having a Metallica T-shirt on.
    My point is that they were awesome 20 years ago. Did anyone notice that all the douche bags that used to rag on you and pick on you in high school for listening to Metallica are their biggest fans now. That should tell you something about their music.
    Its obvious to me that they are way gone off of my list of bands and have been for a very long time.

  • Sammy

    So, I just wasted my company’s time. Meh. I’m terrible at reviewing music videos because I think they all suck. I’d rather LISTEN to music, unless I’m at a show/concert.

  • http://myspace.com/biosyn teaches_of_peaches

    This a lesson in how no to abuse autotune software. Hetfield sounds like a teen who just hit puberty.
    But that horrendous snare drum just totally ruins the song for me. Is Lars cursed?
    I’m really disappointed in Rick Rubin. I thought he could bring them back to form and record a good sounding album, but it sounds like he gave up half-way.

  • gumplunger

    Lars gets shitty drum sounds because he’s a shitty drummer.

  • Bill

    We may not have that long to wait for this album. Blabbermouth is saying that a French record store broke the release day. Metallica message boards are deleting any mention of this. It seems as though this could be legit but I’m not quite sure. This video isn’t that good, but it’s better than the Winds of Plague “banned” video.

  • DethRok

    I agree with Bill here. The Metallica video isn’t good… But way better then the Winds of Plague “banned” video. And there is no comparing the snare tone in St. Anger to the snare on Death Magnetic. One has no damping and sounds like it was recorded by a 15 year old with pro-tools and the other does not. Simple.
    I feel bad for Metallica because they can do no right in the sight of “Metal-Heads”. In their worst they are better then any number of the Disturbed and Slipknots (and other useless bands) out there. Some people need to just climb down from their high horse and rock.

  • http://www.thecontrarianmedia.com The Contrarian

    “Love is a four-letter word?” Is this one of those “don’t ask, don’t tell” situations?

  • vitruvianApe

    this is tear. . . ;this. . is. . tear; this is . . . tear, this is teeeeaarrriiibbblllleeeee – ahhh

  • http://startlingmoniker.wordpress.com DaveX

    I’ll admit, the song is growing on me– but the video was terrible. It looks cheap, makes zero connection with the music whatsoever, and is ultimately rather pointless. And do I need to point out all the weird inconsistencies? I’m no military buff, but I’m pretty sure that isn’t Iraq– looks like wherever all those old Star Trek episodes were filmed. Two guys argue over a bottled water, then get out after something happens to their driverless jeep. They prepare for a firefight that never happens, when– wtf– one of them is wounded. Then the chopper from MASH shows up, leaving us to stare at the remaining soldier, who still hasn’t gotten any bottled water.

    Whatever. He then becomes part of a shock and awe campaign against stalled motor vehicles, getting Random Arab Man and Random Arab Woman back on the road. While Metallica perform what is probably their first return to the land of 45 BPM riffing, the director shows us slow motion footage of army folks giving a Dodge Omni a jumpstart.

    It could have been worse. The obvious “firefight-accompanied-by-metal-solo” has been done before, but damn– how about some sort of basic plot arc? One of the worst videos I’ve seen!

  • canea

    Is this war or a paintball instructional video?

  • hegster

    i just realized that clean guitar part sounds like the main riff from “classical gas” by mason williams.

    check it.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mguzKze1sYo

    the part im talking about starts at about 20 seconds. james kinda slowed it down, and made it less awesome.

    mason williams owns metallica.

  • Ross

    This is why 40 year old guys going through a mid-life crisis shouldn’t be allowed to play Call of Duty 4.

  • Alex Haskett

    the videos pretty bad and i dont like the song either, to be honest they could make the song better by just halfinh the length of it, there was no need for the amount of repitition during the soft parts

  • Eric

    Exploitative? I don’t see it. Yes, maybe it’s a little heavy handed, and it doesn’t have much in the way of action, but it’s certainly not that bad. Still, I agree with Sammy, I’d much rather listen to music on its own.

  • http://music.allansworld.info/ Allan

    Great title lol.

  • amy

    @TedTed: Zing! Nice one!

    It’s impossible to pay attention to this shit-ass retarded video, so i focussed on the song. Big Mistake.

  • Gordon Bombay

    No you aint Dirt !!!!!!!!!

  • Jimflames

    Boring video, great song though. Seeing as listening to the album doesn’t mean i have to watch the video over and over plus the fact that music television shows everything but music videos – i don’t care.

  • Joe

    I personally think Axl or Vince should invite the director of this video to defend his treatment on this site. Honestly, what the hell was supposed to be happening here? You’d think they could just use random footage from Generation Kill and slap the song on top of it.

  • RaZZo

    When did James morph from being the Cowardly Lion (Justice era…) into being Hellboy???

  • iwrestledaferretonce

    wow…..my wife walked in while watching the video and said, “This sounds like a shitty Metallica rip-off!” Imagine her surprise when i told her it was really them.
    She hasn’t listened to metal in years and sees how craptastic they have become.

  • Miroslav

    OMG! A YUGO!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

  • borden

    It’s a good thing I never listen to the radio, that way I’ll never have to listen to that song again!!!!!! The video is the icing on the cake though. Goddammit METALLICA. Please.

  • http://www.myspace.com/bminekime enemyofgod72

    I hate to pile on here but this video was beyond horrible. Metallica has about a gazillion dollars and it looks like they spent $5 bucks on this crapper and even less on whatever dunderhead that directed it. Is that storyline even supposed to make sense? The song has grown on me very slightly (I stopped vomitting when I hear it). I’ve been a fan for over 20 years and I just can’t take this garbage they toss out anymore. They once brought metal to the mainstream now they bring pop to the metal scene. The anti-rockstars have become what they railed against — Rich Bitch Rockstars. Was that $1 million worth it Robert? Get out before I see you doing Pepsi commercials!

  • http://www.myspace.com/bminekime enemyofgod72

    Sorry just watched that Kid Rock piece of crap so at least now I know that the worst song ever made won’t be on Death Magnetic. Although I haven’t heard Unforgiven III yet.

  • Anthony

    It’s sad to see that Metallica have gone from warning the world about the horrors of war while attacking the rich elites to propagandizing in favor of war after they themselves became rich elites. Sad.

  • vance almighty

    “That’s the beauty, I think, of writing vague but powerful lyrics — that someone like a movie director can interpret it in his own way and obviously, someone creative is able to take the metaphors and apply them to whatever he needs in his own life,” the frontman explained. “The main [theme of the video] is the human element of forgiveness and someone doing you wrong, you feeling resentment and you being able to see through that in the next situation that might be similar and not take your rage or resentment out on the next person and basically keep spreading the disease of that through life…The one thing that I wasn’t keen on here was Metallica plugging into a modern war or a current event [that] might be construed as some sort of political statement on our part… There are so many celebrities that soapbox their opinions, and people believe it’s more valid because they’re popular. For us, people are people — you should all have your own opinion. We are hopefully putting the human element in what is an unfortunate part of life. There are people over there dealing with situations like this, and we’re showing the human part of being there.”

    so, the director took hetfield’s interpretation of the song and made it around a couple of soldiers in iraq. they’re not fucking propgandizing the war, it was simply the director’s vision: to use those lyrics in a modern setting.

    i figured i’d post this, since none of you were getting the idea of the lyrics, or the video.

  • Tyler09

    Video is okay. But did you guys hear “My Apocalypse” That song is badass

  • 36Thoughtless

    So, question, in light of Vance Almighty’s well-researched response:

    If you guys are so against pro-war propaganda, how could you stand Avenged Sevenfold’s newest album?

  • 36Thoughtless

    To clarify, I mean such as the lyrics of “Critical Acclaim”…