ANTICHRIST CHRISTMAS – WIN 100 CDS FROM METALSUCKS!!!
Friday, December 19th, 2008 at 10:23am by MetalSucks
Just ’cause we’re Jews doesn’t mean we can’t get a lil’ Xmas spirit in the MetalSucks Mansion – also, Sammy O’Hagar keeps telling us we need to be equal opportunity offenders. And since we have so many fucking CDs lying around that we don’t even want, it seemed like a good time to pass some of this shit onto you, our loyal MetalSucks Maniacs.
So here’s how it’s gonna work: Vince and Axl are each giving away approximately one hundred CDs. I say “approximately” because, like we said, there’s so much shit here that we don’t even know how many CDs there are – it could be a little less than one hundred, it could be a little more. All you have to do to win is tell us why you hate the holidays. You can leave your answer in the comments section below or e-mail it to news [at] metalsucks.net with the words “Antichrist Christmas” in the subject line.
Axl and Vince will choose one winner apiece, and each winner will get a very special care package. We can’t tell you exactly what’s gonna be in said care package, but with around a hundred CDs in there, you’re bound to find something you dig, be it a band you already love or a new discovery.
All entries are due by New Year’s Day. We’ll announce the winners the first week of January ‘09.
Good luck, and HO HO HO! MERRY ANTICHRIST CHRISTMAS!!!
-Axl & Vince
ok. so i’ve been an avid holiday hater for most of my life and here’s why. the holidays, no matter what religion, are supposed to be all about peace, love, happiness, and family. but instead, it’s about shopping and gifts and getting the best deals out there, even if that means trampling people to death (i’m lookin’ at YOU wal-mart shoppers!). instead of enjoying the season, everyone is so stressed out and rude and horrible to each other because they feel like they deserve that $20 set of oven mitts more than you do.
people suck around the holidays. they suck giant fat donkey balls.
that is all. fuck the holidays.
I hate the holidays because I hate people. I even hate you, right now, reading this. I hate you. So much. Give me 100 CDs, and I will probably hate you less. Do it.
First, I hate the holidays because every fucking year I have to listen to god awful Christmas music, buy gifts for people, and see estranged relatives who will pretend like we are brothers.
Second, why the fuck are you wearing a sweater vest? Would you wear this any other time? Hell no you wouldn’t, that thing looks ridiculous.
Third, Have you even ever seen a partridge in a pear tree? I haven’t even seen a fucking pear tree or a partridge, let alone both of them at the same time.
And finally, I’m just going to end up getting wasted and having to “take a day of vacation to visit family out of town” or as I call it, nursing a hang over.
Here’s why I hate the holidays:
I’ve been working in retail for the past 3 or so years. This is my FOURTH Christmas that I’ve worked in retail. Each year, people get crazier and crazier and “the Christmas Spirit” has slowly gone from one of cheer to one of absolute misery. Is it my fault that you’re waiting until the last second to do your shopping? NO! Is it my fault that there’s long lines? NO! Is it my fault that you bought the wrong item? NO! You see, no matter what your religious views are, “The Christmas Spirit”, as we’re all told growing up, is that nice, warm, fuzzy feeling inside and we’re taught to treat everyone with love and respect during this time of year. Apparently, when you put “amazing” sales into that mix, kindness towards a fellow human being goes out the window. For example, my supervisor had a customer tell him that he can go shove a credit card up his ass after there was an issue with a transaction. I mean REALLY PEOPLE!?!? And have you ever tried to park when Christmas shopping? I’m surprised people haven’t resorted to slashing tires when they can’t get a good enough spot. It’s insane! People cut you off, honk their horn… Shit, I think I’d rather drive through a city half the time. At least they have reasons to cut you off and honk their horns. To sum this whole thing up before it becomes a 5 page rant of some sort, “The Holiday Spirit” is a fucking sham at this point and people really do suck!
FUCK CHRISTMAS!!!
People become mindless consumers, herded like sheep and kill people just to get a $15 dollar DVD player that will be on sale after or right before christmas. I hate seeing relatives I don’t give a damn about, as most of them are stuck up catholics who think they are better than me and my “satan” music. I also hate the music as it’s the same damn thing every year. Christ, you’re an asshole for being born
I hate the holidays because it’s the time of the year when America reminds me that if you don’t celebrate the birth of he-who-would-become-a-zombie-and-rule-us-all then you’re really just a piece of shit. Sure there are other holidays with equally religious overtones but we live in a secular, ahem, CHRISTIAN nation so they get no shine, no recognition, they’re not important.
But to make the birth of their Lord and Savior more important to people who don’t give a shit (like moi), they dress him up in a fat suit and have him fly around the world promoting the economy with Tickle Me Elmos and Xbox games.
Christmas isn’t a day about love and selflessness, it’s just another day in the year when Christians remind the rest of that it’s their world and we’re just killing time ’til we burn for all eternity.
And that’s why I hate the fucking holidays.
when i was five, santa gave me his dick, in a box.
I hate the holidays because I’m a Jewish guy and we hate everything. Here’s a few questions I’ve been asked during my time on this giant testicle of a planet
“Wait, you don’t have a Hannukah tree?”
“What’s that Jewish Easter called where you eat those big crackers”
“You only get one present each night? We get all ours at once”
“FUCK FLAG DAY!” – ok that one is mine, but only because flag day sucks.
Why I hate the holidays? Fuck that. I love Christmas. What’s more metal than perverting the holiest Christian holiday with capitalism and commercialism? Seems pretty fuckin’ anti-christ to me. How long until someone has the great idea to put together a black metal Christmas album?
I emailed the winning entry in because I don’t want people stealing my shit. Happy Holidays, fuckers.
The jew’s wacked jesus
I hate the holidays since I am a Pastafarian, and I do not support people ignoring the mighty touch of his noodly appendage.
Why do I hate the holidays let me count the ways!
1 I hate the expectation that is some how never fulfilled.
2 I hate the pretend smile I have to use when I get exactly what I did not want .
3 I hate the fact that I never have been able to send out my Pagan Yule cards.
4 I hate never having enough money to buy what I feel I should.
5.I hate growing up poor and always making the best of the holidays.
6 I hate hating the Holidays because it makes me feel like more of a freak then I am.
7 I hate the Holidays because they SUCK. always have and always will.
8 I hate the fact that someone else will probably win my CD’s
9.I hate making out this list of why I hate the Holidays. Now I am depressed.
But I do love METAL!
I hate the holidays because it means traveling to “Fundie Christian Land” where my parents live and hoping like hell that my husband and my overly-religious relations doing get into an argument about whether or not dinosaurs wore saddles.
I’ll tell you why I actually love the hollidays, Christmas in particular. Anything that will get some otherwise completely rational human being to kill another for a tiny chunk of the mass produced, highly advertised, and criminally expensive corporate fodder that is shit onto the shelves of your neighborhood megalomart every year at this time is just fine by me. Thins out the herd and is survival of the fittest in its best example. And let us not forget that one person in each of our families who never fails every year to say they don’t want anything from anybody. Oh o.k. How about this…”Go Fuck Yourself.” Merry former pagan yuletide rituals now dubbed Christmas. Bonfire’s at my house.
The Jews in my area have turned Secret Santa into Secret Snowman and Merry Christmas into Happy Holidays. I say fuck that.
Peace on earth is just not METAL.
Easter is way more metal than christmass ‘coz at least they had to crucify a dude first for him to rise from the dead.
Crucifixion=Metal
Rising from the dead=Zombie
Zombies=Metal
Christmas is only metal in that people are actually really animalistic and primitive in shopping for bargains and somebody might get killed.
Killing=Metal
However people are shopping for crap that they have been made to feel they HAVE to have.
Sheep=NOT metal.
Mary gave birth to christ without getting busy first (or so she CLAIMED)
No sex= NOT metal.
ChristmAS has way more things that are NOT metal that any other holidays. so fuck christmas.
Christmas is the worst holiday and it’s not supposed to be! Christmas is not supposed to be about going ou and buying gifts for family, friends, and that stupid
god damn boss that you know you hate and he knows you know you hate him. The holiday is getting out of control. You know there are issues when it comes down to a bunch of people
running into a WalMart and crushing a poor old guy, how messed up is that. I bet not one single person stopped to see if he was okay. I work at a grocery store and have seen first
hand how crazy people get during the holidays. It is a time for peace and harmony and goodwill towards men/woman, NOT beating the hell out of old women in order to get the last Christmas ham.
On top of that, when a customer leaves the store you even have the nerve to say, “Merry Christmas” to them because they’ll turn around and freak all over your head because it’s offensive or because
they don’t celebrate that holiday. Well that’s fine and dandy just say thank you and move on, I don’t need you screaming at me because I kindly and sincerely wished you a Merry Christmas. If I was Jewish I most likely
would have wished you a merry Hanukkah, or whatever the hell else everyone celebrates. I mean for Christ sake, in schools, stores etc. you can’t portray a mere picture of a Christmas tree, baby Jesus, or even a god damn star!!
How pitiful is that, people get all pissed about it because it will offend someone, I mean, how hard is it to just ignore a picture??!! Just walk past it, its not like its bothering/harassing you or yelling out “Hey you….ya you..look at me..
Get Out!” You don’t see me freakin’ out when I walk into a foreign store during the holidays and tell them to take down the Menorah, or Vishnu statue because it offends me because its none of my damn business, you can celebrate,worship etc. whatever the hell
you want and I won’t care because it’s not my problem and does not affect me in any way shape or form! Unless it gets to the point where people are being forced to celebrate something or believe in something (which here in Canada is not happening, at least a good
majority of the time), then all the power to you, you can start a fuss….but if not then shut the fuck up! Now onto family, everything is perfect during the year, family-relations wise, until Christmas comes around. ll of a sudden its like a switch flicks.
Is it just me or does it seem like every female in the world begins to fucking PMS the minute Christmas begins (and i mean to the exact second it starts)! Its bad enough that you spend all of your hard earned cash on presents for people you don’t like and family members
that other than on Christmas where they get free shit from you aren’t any where to be seen or give two shits as to whether they talk/see you throughout the year. It is just pointless! The whole process makes you hate the holiday more than enjoy it, as you should be. By the time Christmas
roles around I’m already too exhausted and broke to care. That’s why you are given that little bit of extra time after the holidays to relax, because your so rushed and stressed leading up to it that when its over (if you don’t first jump off a cliff) you just want to hibernate the rest of the time away. In conclusion Christmas is the worst and most hated holiday of the year and the only thing that saves it is the free shit YOU get (not anyone else) and the nice 2 weeks off, cause if I had to work, go to University and celebrate the Christmas holidays at the same time…I would KILL MYSELF!
I hate the christmas beacuse of how corrupt it has become, most stores in most countries that celebrate it have started the christmas season earlier and earlier and now even before halloween, soon we’ll be buying christmas preasants in juli, heck some have already started.
And the buy is relentless, and gets more and more extreme and not even financial crissises create a distraction.
But atleast theres a up side to this season, the whole season is based on the christian celebration of jesus, or is it? Christmas (as it now is known) was original a roman celebration which was turned into a christian tradition to convert romans so they would not rebel against Constantine for forsing em to a new religion, and besides if Jesus was ever born he would most proberly have been born in the summer time. So its not all bad as if they are acctually correct in their religion their all celebrating a “blasphemous holiday” every year, so cheer up, and think of all the devouts who are really celebrating a “heathen season”.
Merry Antichristmas everybody :D
the holidays are a stain on societies taint. between the assholes trying to kill their fellow man for presents, to the mind-numbing christmas music that makes you want to commit suicide, there’s nothing fun about this shitty time of year. have you ever actually SEEN a happy person on the holidays that isn’t rich as hell? NO! besides that, you’re stuck with a family you probably hate and food you just had a month ago at thanksgiving, so what the fucks the big deal?
small story about holiday retail and how fucking dumb people get around this time of year. i worked at a chain CD store over a school break. as soon as you walk into the store, you are greeted to racks of CDs and videos. this woman walks in, does a 180 turn, stares at me, and asks if we sell CDs. HOW FUCKING DUMB ARE YOU!!! it’s not like we were a best buy or something, we literally only sold music.
fucking toolbags.
i’d like to eat a reindeer.
A.
And I thought seven minutes of Hey Jude was excruciating…how bout the month-long masterpiece Wonderful Christmastime by Paul McCartney? Starts the day after Thanksgiving, doesn’t let up til even the biggest Beatles detractors are high on the ‘nog, shoulder to shoulder slurring the anthemic “Ding dong, Ding dong”.
B.
I’m pretty sure all Santa’s reindeer are named after glam bands
“On Winger, On Dokken, On Trixter, On Vixen…On Poison, On Jackyl, On Stryper, On Trixter!! ”
And then they dash away into the night…ranger.
I mean, that’s how it goes right?
Though I gotta admit, seeing Santa get down to some Gypsy Road would probably make my day.
What do I hate about the festive season? I hate the fact that everyone in the metal community seems to get off on hating christmas. It’s an excuse do drink you fuckers, shut the hell up and take your medication!
Let me tell you why I hate the holidays. I hate having to fucking drive 4 hours to the middle of nowhere to see family I dont want to spend time with. Actually id rather slit my own fucking wrists in hatred. The whole gift giving nonsense is fucking juvenile and I hate it. I also hate those make believe santas. Are these guys fucking kidding me?????? Get a real job and shut the fuck up. I hate how on a tuesday at noon theres fucking traffic around the mall. Does anyone work in this town? I live right near the mall so I am directly effected by everything going on with it. FUCK THAT. Ever get the presents that look so fun to open and their fucking boxers and socks?? WHAT THE FUCK? Is this some kind of sick fucking joke. Thanks mom…thanks for the socks. \w/
Fricking radio stations playing christmas music 24/7. What sucks more than that? Radio already sucks, then add in that..damn
I hate the holidays cause when I was 12 my parents decided to get divorced and then live 7 hours apart. When I was young it was fun cause I could have 2 Christmases but now that I am older, living on my own in a city that is 18 hours from the closest parent…I dont get to see both for the holidays and someone always suffers and then I get nagged on for not spending equal time. Then on top of that the majority of my friends from where I grew up all live in the same town still so we try to get together while trying to spend time with 1 family member then they bitch again that I am spending more time with my friends than with them. I recently got married to a woman that also grew up in the same town as one parent, which makes this easier and harder cause now we have to see her friends and her family…
So it ends up being this shit storm the whole time while trying make everyone happy. Its just going to get worse when we have kids.
So send me some killer and some shitty music to make me forget about it, or at least keep me occupied while on the plane.
That’s not a typo in B either, yes Trixter is the name of two reindeer…for the same reason the band’s cover album contains two…count ‘em….two versions of the song 50 Ways To Leave Your Lover. And that reason was once echoed in a Tootsie Pop commercial…”The world may never know”. Maybe Santa wanted to doubly honor a glam band that got so deep into the yuletide spirit that they invited Johnny “Snow Miser” Winter to perform on their second album.
C.
New Years always gives me a chance to reflect on the happily memorable events of the last year, like earlier this year when I was first able to catch the music video accompanying one of the heaviest and most epic songs in recorded history. That’s right…I’m talking about Can’t Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon. I dunno if you’ve seen the official video before, but I strongly recommend it. Starting with one of the most incredibly significant pieces of imagery mankind has ever seen, the baby falling through a black screen…Kevin Cronin dons the most metal of Steinmart exclusives and belts this bad boy out under crushing weight of his own hair. Don’t forget this cinematic magic: the scene during the line “I’ve been running round in circles in my mind”…not gonna give this one away, you gotta witness it for yourself. This New Years I resolve never to watch another music video by any bands starting with REO…or ending with Speedwagon.
Thank you
Oh… Let me count the ways
- I’m a 45 year old extreme metal lover; On or about October 31st, the “holiday” music begins. Can ya feel my stomach churn…?
- I’m of Scandinavian dissent… The Christians brutally stole everything about their holiday from my freaking people. A quick review: Christ was born on December 25th. Wrong. The pagan solstice is December 21st. The Church made Christ’s birthday around that day to ease the transition to their religion. (Christ’s birthday was actually around September or October.)
- The Heathen God Odin, had his wild hunt on around the solstice. This is where he flew around from village to village collecting the “lost souls”. He rode a chariot pulled by goats across the sky. Goats with horns… A man with a beard… A chariot… ? Hmmm… Sound familiar? Just so you know… The Goddess Frigga, Odin’s wife, has been pegged as “Mrs. Claus.”
- The beloved tree with ornaments: In Scandinavia evergreens were predominant. (Duh! It’s freakin’ cold.) The decorations on them were actually gifts the villagers left each other for the solstice. Ahhh blatant theft… What a wonderful thing!!!
- How about that wreath we like to stick on the doors? These were actually huge wheels made out of evergreen branches. They were perched on a high hill and set on fire. Then they were set loose and rolled down the hill while burning. This symbolized the coming of the sun filled days. Since after all, the solstice is the shortest “day” of the year. A huge burning wheel rolled uncontrollably down a hill… Now that’s metal!!!
- I’m not Christian. Why should I be guilted into spending hordes of cash in the name of a messiah I don’t believe in? I’m sure Christ probably existed… But my Gods are still Odin, Thor, Tyr and Loki. And I’m proud to be a Heathen. Leave me alone about Christmas already. I celebrate Jul with other Heathens and basically we just eat lot of food, praise the Gods and pass around a horn full of mead… What’s your day like?
- Since the time I was nine years old my mom and dad drank and popped pills making my into the stuff of nightmares that have never stopped… Oh yeah, how can I not love this holiday?
Bottom line… The Jewish people are the only ones with a clue… They stuck to there traditions and customs. And I’m not kissing this websites ass when I say that. Christmas has become a joke. It was a stolen myth created to compete for money and that’s all. Anything good about it… Any good intentions were bastardized into travesty. The day needs to die.
So there you have it… Why I despise Christmas. How you say? It is nothing more than A Shit Stain on the Ass of the World.
I hate the hangovers
i hate christmas because it’s a time for family and friends
For a time that is supposed to be about peace and joy, it sure is a bigger fairy tale. Let’s all gather ’round and I’ll tell you the truth about “peace on earth and good will toward men.”
Go to any store during the holiday season and you’ll find a mass of human cattle who have chewed compassion and manners up and shit it out along with the grass that they might as well be consuming.
If you ever wanted to see a bunch of politically correct assbags set the Guinness world record for biggest collective PMS session, the words “Merry Christmas” will do the job. if that somehow doesn’t do the trick, then gather a bunch of ultra-extreme feminists and tell them that Christmas is about peace on earth and good will toward men.
Christmas is a time for one of our most revered traditions: lying to our kids about a fat man in a red suit who can miraculously jump down millions of chimneys at the same exact second, then taking our kids to the mall and letting them sit on the laps of millions of fat guys who, for all we know, could be potential pedophiles.
And let’s not forget the music. We don’t need Metallica or Drowning Pool to torture the prisoners of Guantanamo Bay. Just play Christmas music all year round! If annoying covers of the “classics” and songs like “All I Want For Christmas Is You” don’t do the job, I don’t know what will.
And yet, in spite of all this, we’re supposed to walk around with smiles on our faces? Doing so with true sincerity would be a bigger stretch than a fat man being able to fit into a chimney, let alone slide down (and back up) one with ease.
With all that said, let’s brave the final excruciating week of the 2008 holiday season with the one true icon of the holiday season: a nice bottle of 30-proof Egg Nog.
My fuming hatred for the holidays has nothing to do with the commercialism, the horribly atrocious music, spending time with my “precious” family, or even the inclination of those deceived by religion to spread their poison to every single person they come in contact with, but instead is the result of egg nog. Who the fuck actually likes that shit…. even alcoholic it’s nothing special. Seriously there’s a reason we only drink that shit once a year. “If you don’t like it don’t drink it” right? Insightful logic. With a brilliant mind like that how about you hang around and explain to every single person at the party that I am choosing not to partake in their beloved beverage because I think it tastes like shit. Regardless, I do think the devil is pretty excited about how much he fucked up the holidays though.
Where do I start?
I work at a very popular department store and everyone who shops there are very preppy, non-metal, suburban-type shitstains who think that the world revolves around them. During the Christmas season, especially “Black Friday” they feel that you are their slave. No pleases or thank yous, just “Where the fuck is this/that.” Christmas tends to bring in the STUPIDEST FUCKING PEOPLE too. People who talk on their cell-phones the whole God-damn time they are in the store talking about what Britney Spears shoved up her cunt last night.
Christmas is such a fucked up holiday anyway. It’s the biggest fucking scam to get you to spend your hard earned money on shit that was made in China and will break the second your kid takes it our of the box. People run up their credit cards and drive themselves into so much fucking debt just to keep their bratty kid from screaming that he didn’t get everything on his list this year. Fuck those stupid kids…I will fucking eat your children.
All the decorating, let’s talk about that. I don’t need to see Santa’s fat ass illuminating every damn neighborhood I drive into. People will risk a fucking major fire hazard just to make their house look like a bunch of elves jizzed “Yuletide joy” all over it. I should burn their houses down…then eat their children.
“Oh” you say “but JESUS!”. Fuck Jesus. Jesus was never real. I’ve seen magicians do better than that shit they call “miracles”. Fuck Jesus, I will fucking eat Jesus.
I’m hungry.
What I hate about the holidays is that it is the “holidays” now, no longer is it merry christmas, all the fucking bleeding heart liberals don’t want to offend anybody so you cant say merry christmas anymore, oh but you can still say happy Hanukkah, or happy Kwanzaa or whatever the fuck your ethnicity is thats ok but if I (A white american) say merry christmas I may offend some poor fucking minority mother fucker from another country.
Holy Fuck
I hate Christmas because people seem to think that the only important thing is getting what they want.
Now give me my fucking CDs.
Merry Christmas BLACK213, hit the nail on the head
I hate the holidays because it’s fucking cold which means I have to haul in 4 loads of wood a day which makes my hernia hurt a lot. Fuck that.
I hate the holidays because you have here people say this utterly idiotic saying:
“Jesus is the reason for the season.”
I hate the holidays because of the mindless Wall Mart who sheep won’t hesitate to trample an innocent man to death just to get a discount flat screen.
I hate that most people who come into my work (a fast food chain) during this season are grumpy from shopping with their fellow imbiciles all day and act extra nasty. I hate seeing yuppies in their nice cars, loaded with shit I probably won’t ever afford, in the drive thru all bundled up while I’m freezing near the open window and not only serve them with a smile…but wear some stupid fucking “holiday” button.
I hate the fact that at 23, the callous/greedy youth of today (who all aspire to live on “The Hills” and share facebook messages w/ Kanye), make me feel like an old man. Bastards are barely potty trained and they want iPhones?!
I hate being forced to entertain certain family members whom you generally can’t stand throughout the regular year. Come winter time, you’ve got to be extra nice to that drunken uncle or perv cousin who refrains from showering and likes to steal your shit.
I hate the fact that its almost 2009 and humanity is still so hopelessly attached to religion. Yeah, its called winter break in schools these days and given the choice…most children would rather save Santa than Jesus from crucifiction…but we all know the bullshit premise behind this stuff.
Lastly, I hate the holidays, especially New Years because people drunkenly celebrate the passing of time like its a GOOD thing. You hear people reminisce about about old times with such fondness, not realizing each passing year is one less year they have to live. The countdown on New Years eve is the worst…might as well be the death clock.
With all the Christmas suicides and drunkdriving fatalities/gun shot victims (at least where I live) on New Years, coupled with the legions of assholes one encounters during this season, this leaves me with no other choice but saying:
FUCK THE HOLIDAYS.
I will explain why I hate the seasons. First off, it’s complete bullshit. The fact that every one pretends to be more nice to one another, whilst on the inside, they are still thinking of how stupid or ugly or fat you are. They always have an attitude with strangers, then they apologize for it. It makes the whole fucking lot of sheep even more hypocritical for their “turn the other cheek” and “do unto others” crock of shit. Fuck everyone. Humanity is a plague upon the world. As far as the whole, Jesus bullshit? Mary must have been around 15 when she was pregnant with Jesus, which makes God a pedophile. Not to mention she was a whore. No way she was a virgin. Jesus was a bastard. They are all dead. Have been for centuries. Fuck Christianity. Like you all at Metalsucks.net, I am an equal opportunity hater. So fuck everyone. People only use Christmas as an excuse to spend money for one another, commercializing themselves even further. FUCK THE WORLD! FUCK JESUS! FUCK GOD! FUCK SANTA! Oh…by the way. Santa. Rearrange the letters. Satan. Satan Claus will come to your homes and eat your kids. MWuahahaha!
smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat !HOLIDAYSFUCKHOLIDAYSFUCK! smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke fuck ciggie eat smoke
I hate Christmas because I hate spending my whole fucking Christmas bonus on stupid bullshit that no one will ever use. And on the other side of it, I hate getting stupid ass gifts you can tell the person put absolutely no thought into and I have to sit there with a fake ass smile and come up with a bullshit story about how I’ll somehow use it for something other than toilet paper/firewood/table leveler/pooper scooper/jizz collector.
I also hate how fucking religious Christmas gets. Why ruin the one time of year I have to actually be happy around my family? The one time of year I know my dad isn’t going to hound me about my debt, my drinking, my pot smokage, etc. I can be completely toasted out of my mind on Christmas, and that’s ok! But when you get the family members that get all fuckin preachy and make you hold hands with your boogery handed little cousins while you stare at the ground for 15 excruciating minutes and wait for the stupid fuckin prayer to end, it’s absolutely ridiculous. Nothing makes me more uncomfortable than a family member asking me “Isn’t it great that God brought us together this season?”, or telling me “I’m just so glad God allowed us all to be healthy and make it here today.” What am I supposed to say to that? “God doesn’t exist aunt Hazel. Money and a need for useless bullshit brought us together today, but thanks for asking”.
Not to mention the fact that I broke up with my girlfriend last Christmas because my room mate caught her fucking my other room mate’s boyfriend in the bathroom while we were both asleep. Kicking your live-in girlfriend out of the house at 3 in the morning on Christmas is a great way to celebrate holiday cheer! FUCK!
It’s simple. I hate Christmas becasue X-Mas times mean we get Christmas albums.
And Christmas albums make me want to throw hot grease on my ears.
trees belong outside
I hate the holidays because I never get what I fucking want.
bunch of fucking grinches in here.
i hate the holidays cause every metalhead in the world gets a persecution complex and sulks like a 15 year old, making me look like an asshole by proxy. with that said, christmas music blows, and i really hate spending money on things people i dont like dont want anyway.
I hate the holidays because The Great Satan is demonized for once in the entire year. The rest of the year Satan rules. Everyone is down with Satan. But for like 2 weeks a year Satan gets bashed. There are no Metal Christmas Albums, at least not ones that don’t suck. There is no such thing as Xmascore, even though Xcore would make a great genre name –better yet Black Xcore. I’ll burn a church to that! But it doesn’t exist, because Satan is given the back seat during the holiday season. Even Venom doesn’t dare do stuff during the last half of December, let alone the pussies of the ABM scene, and less evil forms of metal, forget it. You think Metallica is going to do a tour with openers Valient Thor in the last half of December, no fucking way. All this adds up to one thing: Satan is under represented for these few weeks. I mean, we tried, me and my Jew cabal, ohh did we try. We launched an entire war on Christmas (basically trying to re-start Satan’s war on heaven) and Bill “it sucks” O’Reilly has to come and squash it. He comes in with his, “we say Merry Christmas” bumper stickers, and his threats to “cut our mics,” and his Walmart boycotts –actually that one is okay. And where is Satan in all of this? Sipping coco under a blanket with Seasonal Anxiety Disorder, letting it fucking snow in Hell. That’s right, Satan is so depressed in his lack of representation that he puts away his HellHammer and 1349 records and lets it snow for a week in Hell. I once said to the Prince of Darkness that it would be a cold day in Hell when he turned off “Sculptor Of Flesh” by 1349 from it’s 24 hour a day replay schedule, and then he does it because of Christmas, and it fucking snowed. That’s what I fucking hate about the holidays, it fucking snows, in Hell. All of this because The Great Satan gets so depressed about not being worshiped, revered, and generally respected for fucking running shit during the holiday season. It sucks.
Ok…I’m not particularly festive, but why the fuck do people have to bitch and moan about Merry Christmas, or any of that bullshit? If somebody wants to say Merry Christmas, let them! Fuck! Being in a free country obviously just allows the right to cry all the time about meaningless shit.
Why do I hate the holidays. Well first in the total commercialization of it, the notion that if you don’t camp out at Menards or Target at 4:45 am in the freezing snow just to be the FIRST one in the door your somehow not living the spirit of the holiday. Man I’ve gone to black friday twice now and people are soooooo rude I can’t even put it into words even elderly ladies you think would have at least some manners are completely without care for anyone else. I’ve sat and watched two grown women literally get into a fist fight just to secure their spot as the “first person in the door”. Aside from being pretty pathetic it was I have to say amusing to watch them both get hauled away in hand cuffs. Another aspect of the holidays i despise is all the commercials on TV, some how or another every single store somehow relates their useless products to Christmas, hell I’m surprised i haven’t seen a commercial about Christmas cheer toilet paper yet. Especially the whole Taco Johns Nachos Navidad bullshit, wow we have green nachos so you must come to us to spread the Christmas glee what a fucking joke. Another thing I hate about the holidays is these super family’s who think its absolutely essential that they have to have every member of their family wear those atrocious santa hats everyyywhere they go, I wonder if they also wear these to go pick up a dime bag from their favorite drug dealer just so they can actually tolerate the holidays also. I saw this in a fast food place the other day and i really just wanted to go up so super-dad and ask him what the fuck is wrong with him. I also hate seeing relatives at the annual party who you have absolutely nothing to say to and only see once a year. They all try to act to interested in how you have been when they make absolutely no attempt at all during the year to make contact with you. Thats about all for now, out of all I mentioned though I think Taco Johns pisses me off the most though.
I hate the holidays because people always say about how horrible it is –
IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT DON’T LOOK
on Christmas Day just go back to your’re death records and world of warcraft whilst everyone else in the world smiles!
thats the way it should be
Why do I hate Christmas?
Well, there’s the music, the family, the in-laws, the credit card bills, wrapping presents, the expectations, the disappointment, the cold, the swarms of crazy/angry/impatient/greedy people at stores and on the streets, the traveling to see people I don’t really care about seeing, the heaps of delicious foods that make me fatter, the fucking Salvation Army bell ringers (I hate that goddamn bell so much – it’s ear-piercing crunch has more brutality than a Behemoth/Hate Eternal/Vader split cd), the manger scenes, the queer White Elephant gift exchange at work, the holiday movies/tv specials, and the fact that property taxes are due.
But those things aren’t the worst. There is something infinitely more disturbing and annoying, something that I’ve grown to hate more than anything I’ve already mentioned – top ten lists composed of (mostly) shitty music.
im not a huge fan of christmas, because im an australian with full greek heritage. with this greek heritage comes the fucking, church at 5 am on CHRISTMAS DAY.
oh, and it goes till about 9:30/10:00 off memory. it could go even later but i dont really want to think about it. Heres the kicker: YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO EAT B4 CHURCH.
honestly, have you ever tried doing that… not eating anything for 5 hours. in the morning as well. and im not drunk/high. and then you get home, and try and throw off your damn ‘church clothes’ but then your parents yell at you, cos they want you in a photo with your idiot family. and then they act all happy at you, 2 seconds after they screamed at you for wanting to wear jeans and a band shirt.
so the present parts pretty good, except for the bit where you have to sit around talking about your presents, after getting them, instead of fucking off and using it/throwing it into the corner of your bedroom. and if you do fuck off, your parents think ure an ingrateful son of a bitch who should be shot. oh and then they blame metal. ‘all that satan crap you listen to, ure starting to believe.’ do i need to explain myself on this website about that? lets hope not.
anyway so we get to actual food time, which is great cos my grandparents/parents actually rule at cooking, so i can eat shitloads of fat food and then drink lots of beer and greek spirits. BUT THE MUSIC THEY PLAY IS LIKE A PINBALL MACHINE INSIDE YOUR HEAD… Id rather listen to Mayhem: Live In Leipzig (great concert, it just sounds like it was recorded on a fucking laptop) then any christmas music, or god forbid (like last year) fucking choirs singing christmas carols…. god
and fuck if its a time to be happy, whip on some guns and roses or Purple…
and that is why i hate christmas.
fuck off, let me wake my pissed off teenage self up when it wants to, and then let me get my ipod out of the box and then let me fuck off so i can load all my music onto it, while i play guitar all day.
I work in retail so i have to hear the same damn songs over and over non-stop from november to january. now if there were metal xmas/holiday songs i wouldnt mind but i hear the same crap whereever i go.
The One thing that I hate about the holidays is Santa Claus, the Harvester of Sorrow, if you will. On Christmas, he rides off in silence, no Motorbreath from his Four Horsemen. He lands atop The House That Jack Built, leaping down the chimney Trapped Under Ice, a Jump In The Fire. It’s Sad But True, that a figure so much Holier Than Thou is posing for the gifts that you provide. For the children, I suppose, he’s the Hero Of The Day, but to every adult, The Thorn Within. Painfully, he causes us to empty our wallets quicker than we drain a Battery. Racing Through The Never of malls, The Shortest Straw ready to break as you try to tear through The Struggle Within. All for that faithful morning when you Hit The Lights and they open their presents, No Remorse floods through you then. With Dyer’s Eve past you can finally let loose that sigh of relief, For Whom The Bell Tolls. Relaxation when you close your eyes and let the world Fade To Black..
..if only until you have to cook the Turkey, after all, Nothing Else Matters.
I hate the fact that a bunch of bad ass metal bands have not got together and recorded a kick ass metal christmas album. How fucking cool would it be to see bands like The Absence or Bloodbath do a christmas album.
Two Words-Christmas Music
It is dreadful.
Ahhh the holidays…times of cheer, joy, peace and fruitcake. Where many of my friends and colleagues pop a woody around this time of year, I hang limp and dreary. I suppose my hatred of Christmas comes first and foremost from the pile of soggy horse manure that is Christmas music. This is pretty much a given reason for everyone that hates Christmas so I won’t expand on this topic.
However a line from the movie Prefontaine. I won’t go into the details of that film, but one of the characters says: “I live for the discus. I hate Christmas and Thanksgiving and Easter – anything that breaks my routine. ” My friends and I shortened this to a simple machoism “I hate Christmas.” Saying that line often I came to realize yes, i do actually hate Christmas. Whenever anyone around me says something about Christmas, without hessitation, I reply “I hate Christmas.” As is expected, I’ve caught a lot of flake from this. At first I would explain the process of how I came to hate Christmas, but I was doing it so often that I decided to hell with it.
I now tell people that I celebrate Festivus. You mean that holiday from Seinfeld? Yes, but it was around before Seinfeld. The Airing of Grievances is a wonderfully diabolic tradition in which everyone takes turns telling others the way they have failed them in the past year. And of course Festivus is not over until the head of a table is pinned. This has led to some truely epic drunken wrestling matches.
All in all, “I hate Christmas.”
I hate the holidays because shrooms are generally hard to find in the area compared to the summer moths. And when I do, they’re fucking expensive. That and DMT. Pisses me off.
I hate the holidays because shrooms are generally hard to find in the area compared to the summer months. And when I do, they’re fucking expensive. That and DMT. Pisses me off.
I hate the holidays cuz i fucking hate jesus. And jesus was born, or ressurcted during the holidays, or whatever the fuck he was, i dont give a shit. He’s a piece of shit. And i hate all these yuppy christian fucks going to church and singing bullshit poser songs. fuck them. that sucks. All these peopel trying to have the best looking house. fuck off. I also hate the holidays, because they start the ‘holiday season’ earlier and earlier every goddamn year. pretty soon, life will just be the holiday season. suck my fucking genitals. …Christmas is about jesus. and church is about jesus. and peopel in chruch, fuck little boys. and i hate when people fuck little boys. fuck the holidays,. they suck.
Each and every Christmas season sucks because everyone with a brain cell and the ability to type thinks it’s their duty to tell us, the thinking population, what was so great (and not) about the year. Shut the fuck up. We can figure out what we should listen to and ignore. For the 2008 list, Gorjira blows; get over it, Ritalin people. GNR? Sit and spin. The so-called Christmas holiday is about one thing: Buckethead. Save a turkey and grab a bucket.
i fucking hate Christmas. or as its now known.. “holiday”. more than ever this year. i’m just tired of the same thing every fucking year: the same 6 or 7 shitty songs just done into the ground, every commercial is some store telling you what you should buy to make yourself a better person. christmas is no longer about spending time with annoying relatives, but instead has been a consumer paradise. not that its anything new, its been that way for awhile. i’m not a religious person, never really have been, but i know enough to know that christmas has absolutely nothing to do with Jesus anymore. sure he might have been born on that day, if such a guy ever existed, but still.
i’m just sick of how repetitive its become. we need a new twist on christmas. i sorta feel like Jack Skellington wanting to leave Halloween Town because every year its the same fucking deal. my family isn’t even decorating for christmas this year. oh and thats another thing. the stupid, cheesy decorations. there’s really no other reason to put bright lights around your house other than to draw attention to your shitty house that you can barely afford and will probably end up having it be foreclosed anyway. and get the nativity scene off your fucking lawn. maybe i’m just not in a festive mood this year, but it seems that everything about christmas is just fucking annoying. i can barely watch tv during these past few weeks because the consumerism is just overwhelming.
ALSO: these fucking commercials that are obviously christmas themed but still feel like they have to say “Happy Holidays”. what the fuck other holiday would you be talking about when you’re showing Santa, candy canes, a CHRISTMAS tree, and stockings? i know that Vince and Axl don’t have those things in their apartment. if i saw Vince or Axl on the street i would not say “happy holidays” obviously because they’re Jewish so i’d say “hey dudes, happy fuckin hannukah” and i’d throw them the horns. saying “happy holidays” instead of “hey man, merry christmas” is like calling a retard “special”. its actually more offensive instead of attempting to be less offensive. we all know what the big holiday is this time of year. again, thats no disrespect to anyone’s religion or anything. there’s this commercial that plays during Nick at Nite (fresh prince represent!) that advertises “holiday” episodes of the shows they play during the night, but if i’m not mistaken, all those shows have families that celebrate Christmas? so why can’t they just say christmas episodes?
whatever. merry shitmas to everyone this year
i hope you all have a decent Christmas in these recession times. and for those of you that don’t celebrate christmas, i hope you have a great Hannukah/Kwanza/whatever else
Vince and Axl, have the most metal fucking Hannukah ever. set some shit on fire with that Menorah and bump some Turisas!
peace
The thing I hate about the holidays [beyond all of the awkward family visits] is that people get me gifts that I’m not expecting. When I find out, I am left with very little time to scrounge up something of comparable value for them, and I have no idea what they actually would like.
tl;dr I hope you like this Black Dahlia Murder CD that I picked out, man, because I didn’t have time to check if you already own it.
I hate the holidays because of commercialism, family pretending to like each other for the sake of Jesus apparently, crappy food, people feeling that they have to buy presents for everyone instead of actually just enjoying each others company (which is apparently what we’re supposed to do), old pine needles that are still pricking my feet in June from the damn tree, fruit cake, fruit cake(s), the inevitable Christmas marathons on every single channel of the television because the stations are too lazy to actually do their job and entertain me, Christmas carolers/Christmas songs, the bell ringers for the Salvation Army (not that it is bad to give to charity, but do you have to be so damn annoying about it?), people pretending to be cheery when because of the failing economy they are actually completely dead inside, and also because the holidays are the time when the homeless rape, pillage, and set fires to newborn kittens. Oh, I also hate Santa/Satan. I plan to watch the original Dawn of the Dead on Christmas to truly celebrate consumerist whores and their damn presents. Good Day!……….and UN-Happy Holidays.
I hate the holidays because everybody’s happy and smiling. They’re also celebrating the birth of the great Nazarene liar. Hail Santa !
Normally I hate the holidays but not because everybody’s happy or becoming a consumer (that’s just their choice -however mindless), but because…
You know what? Fuck this. Fuck you… I don’t have to explain anything to you… Eat dick.
Why hate the holidays? Its a holiday. Sure fuck the corporate nightmare that Christmas has become. But you get to laze around at home and drink beer. What else do you want?
I don’t hate the holidays. At least I told the truth unlike half the liars in this thread. Now send me the CDs already!
I hate the holidays because all it is a bunch of big corporate douches exploiting a religion’s biggest celebration so they can helicopters and fucking shit like that. I also hate the fact that every Christmas, I get reminded how paathetic my life is during christmas. I can’t pass out drunk outside or else i wake up not feeling my toes/fingers, and the cold just makes it harder to find people with weed. FUCK christmas.
I’m Jewish as well, But that’s not why I hate the holidays. I was raised celebrating Hanukkah and Christmas. I hate the holidays because the atmosphere is surrounded by one of two things, bitter human beings that wine about corporate holiday slogans like “Happy Holidays” or “Merry Christmas”. Everyone gets offended by everything now…The other thing is the music. Sure I enjoyed it a lot as a child, but now it’s too much. The same songs over and over and over and over and over again! There’s hardly few metal renditions of Christmas songs at all. Everyone from NSYNC to Clay Aiken and every other pop signer and their needle sharing friends all have a Christmas album. But very few metal bands have them. And there’s also no good Christmas specials on TV anymore. Now it’s a shitty ABC Family movie once a year. None of the other channels ever do something special anymore. They barely play the older Christmas shows from old cartoons and things like that. They think by playing Miracle on 34th Street on Thanksgiving every year that it’ll make up for it, but it doesn’t. There’s no spirit anymore, there’s just frequent buying, bitterness, traffic, shitty weather, and a partridge in a fucking pair tree!
But Happy Holidays, Happy Hanukkah, and Shalom guys!
*singer* Woops. didn’t see that.
Drunk relatives like to slap me in the back of the head whenever they get the chance.
I hate the holidays for many reasons
Growing up as a Jew, i would always be the one in class who, when called upon by the teacher, asking what i was doing for the holidays, would reply, well, after Hanukkah? Nothing. Then there would be the whole half-hour ‘interview’ by the class.
“What’s Hanukkah?”
“Why do you light the candles?”
And then the racist jokes would follow, which never bugged me, but always made me feel excluded.
Especially when all of my buddies would be getting the best new game, or awesome toys, and i would get to play with the dreidle.
Because of this, i would be the one watching many Christmas specials during the holidays since all of my friends were busy with family, or other friends of the same religion, or even with their church, and i thus hate most of the holiday’s ‘festive’ songs, after so much repetition.
At about the same time i started listening to Metal, I noticed that not many Cd’s come out around the holiday season, seeing as bands can be busy with the same thing, and this made me hate the holidays even more. Especially from all the holiday song covers done by bands, i fucking hate holiday cheery fucking songs.
Also, being a reform Jew (but hardly, seeing as my family has never been big on practicing), I always felt excluded by every religion, if i went to synagogue, people would stare at me as if i didn’t belong, what with my band shirts and dark clothing. If i went to church, same story, and this made me hate the holiday season that much fucking more.
Besides, these days all the holidays are about is who can buy the best gift or spend the most money. People have been fucking trampled to death over stupid ass shit like that.
Fuck The Holidays
I hate Christmas because it’s the time for giving and yet my wife still won’t blow me.
I hate fucking Xmas cuz no matter where I wanna go, just because a fucking mall is in the middle I got I a fucking Traffic Jam!!
I hate the fucken Hoilday’s…Why cuz everybody so fucken fake this time of year…However it’s my annual DJ gig XMETAL FEST where I DJ from 12 midnight Xmas day to 12a.m. the following day… everything from ACDC to DARKANE…So 100 cd’s will help!..peace fellas and thanks for a great year..Raul
I have alway hated christmas. I am a r.n. and worked christmas for the last 15 yrs. when I worked the old folks home I hear people saying I love grandma but dont have the time to see her. they live less then 2 miles from the old folks home!!! then in the hospital I worked at. I hear the same shit. someone who has not seen there parents for 15 yrs comes in and tries to make up 15 yrs in 2 mins. then leaves!!! and never seen again. and I am tired of the same christmas songs remade over and over and over again. ( these people have the same mind set as gene simmons. repack the same songs in new packages and people are stupid enough to by them!!!!) the only thing I like about chrsitmas is rudolph the red nose raindeer. that never gets old. p.s. merry christmas black 213 you have never spoken truer words than that…
Are any of these any good, or are they all the crap that Vince listens to?
Things I hate about xmas.. hmm ..
Xmas songs ..
Religeous crap ..
Pointless movies ..
Snow ..
Delayed trains ..
Wrapping paper ..
One hell of a mess to clean up, when you didn’t want anything anyway ..
The fact you know you have a ton of work to do before you go back, but cant be arsed ..
A small break but when you just start to relax your straight back at work ..
And one hell of a massive hangover
But one good thing does come of xmas ..
Knowing the fat mans suit is turning black the more chimneys he gets stuck in.
Santa in a black suit .. awesome
I hate Christmas because ChristmasSucks (wink-wink, nudge-nudge)
Here is why I hate the holidays:
As much as I detest the sheep mentality of most religions, and therefore shouldn’t give a shit about any of them, it sickens me to see how Christmas has been driven so far from the point. It’s not about celebrating the birth of Christ, it’s all about “What am I gonna get?” It brings out the absolute worst in people. “Oh, I am not sending them a card. When have they ever sent us a card!!” Childish.
Only stupid, slow, fucking morons shop at Christmas. Every one of them. Clueless Grammas in Hot Topic and records stores, totally oblivious to what the fuck is going on.
What I hate most is that by the time the store opens on November 1st, the whole fucking place is Christmased up and they start with the fucking music. Halloween is so much more metal.
Not to mention the fact that the majority of the population is not Christian but Christmas is the only day that the entire western civilization stops.
What I hate most about the holiday season is how much everyone ELSE hates the holiday season. It’s supposed to be a time for love and friendship and tolerance of the human race. Despite this, you can walk into any retail store in the world at Christmas and are guaranteed to run into at least one person who treats you like dog cum.
But the thing to realize about this scenario is that this person only acts this way because they are tired of the shopping and the commercialism and greed. They hate having to put on a fake smile for their Great Aunt Helga who they only see once a year, or attend a party with people they don’t really like. They are pissed about all the crowds, and the happy-go-lucky Christmas carols, and the shitty service they just recieved from that overworked 15 year old cashier who’s had to deal with the same type of assholes all day long.
I hate Christmas because everyone is so self-absorbed that they can’t see that everyone else is going through the same bullshit and decide take it out on other people. Although I suppose these days nothing say Merry Fuckin Christmas like hating humanity.
Lolz check out the band I Declare War. There like grindcore/deathcore and they just released 3 new christmas songs its hillarious.
1.You know how hard it is to take Brootal black metal pics in the snow with all those damn colorful lights?
2.Having to care or atleast pretend to care about others.
3.Having a holiday special on like every channel.
4.More talk about Jesus & how him & that fat guy are always watching us.
5.Being broke
6.Realizing that I just got used to writing 08 on everything & now I`m gonna have to start writing 09.
7.Having to act like I’m happy & surprised when I get socks again.
8.cleaning up all the damn messes.
9.It’s only a matter of time before I gotta deal with this shit all over again.
10.There is not 1 damn good movie in theaters this Christmas except for the one about that Space Nazi Tom Cruise trying to kill that Hitler guy.
11.Weird looks from people when I wear my corpsepaint & spiked bracers shopping & wishing they’d have thought of it.
12.Knowing next year there will be about 5 soccer moms wearing corpse paint & spiked bracers so they can have an edge on the Christmas sales competition.
13.last but not least…(drum roll plz) fruitcake
1. Christmas sucks, because even if i can trust that everything can happen, in january i’ll have to look at my damned president of the country again (I’m from poland, where government just suck).
2. Even during god damned christmas, CDs in my country are expensive…
3. So many annoying carrols
4. Lot food that suck, as christmas do
5. I know that my christmas present will be another pair of god damned socks…
6. During christmas everyone’s home, so i cant play my electric guitar loud
7. I hate christmas, because grandma want’s me to play carrols on my evil black electric guitar
8. Christmas sucks, because it’s Santa Claus, not Satan Claus.
I hate the holidays cause my family won’t play Gojira.
I hate the holidays because there’s the random chance i’ll see a movie on tv like Single Santa Seeks Mrs. Claus. The world was never crying out for more of anything staring Steve Guttenberg and they especially weren’t demanding creep sex offender vibe type staring roles either. Nothing gets you out of the holiday spirit than the possibility that in between scenes, Guttenberg’s character could be having violating young boy’s anus while stroking his hair and whispering in his ear “Deck the halls with bells and holly, sweetheart”. I’m converting to Judaism next year if it helps me avoid being maroon on the dog shit island that is Single Santa Seeks Mrs. Claus.
I’m probably writing this only for lulz since I don’t win anything anyway. See, that’s the thing sucks about Christmas and the year in general – I have to wait for it to get anything since I don’t win any contests. I have crap luck, I guess. (Actually, this contest probably sucks, ’cause I’ll win just to find out that I won’t get 100 CDs shipped overseas). But let’s genuinely ponder what sucks about Christmas. For me, it isn’t that I have to spend time with the family. I don’t hate my parents like most of the people my age. What sucks are those gifts that scream “I didn’t know what to get you, since I don’t know crap about you like, so I got you this POS”. I’ve actually developed and are practicing a simple method, the “Give some cash” method. Makes it easier for them and for me. Still that doesn’t work every time so I still have to be all grateful for a pair of socks.
But that’s not that bad. Socks are at least useful. All that Christmas ads though – don’t even get me started, since I did that already. If Joe Duplantier were dead, he’d be tossing in his grave, but he’s not so he’s probably spitting foam whenever he turns the TV on.There’s a metric fuckton of Christmas themed ads, with no merit, aimed at all the stupid people that don’t have anything better to do than watch the telly. And those ads create all those riots, and masses of people that try to get all their presents three days before Christmas. I mean, come on, how stupid do you have to be to think that you’ll be able get everything you want easily on December 21 and 22? Hint – you’re not. It’s too late. Stop annoying the shit out of me through populating every square feet of every store with you clueless presence FFS!
So, that. And all the usual stuff, that I don’t even have to tell you about. Because I’m not that big of a douche to hammer the point on and on turning you, the reader, into an emo kid that will the holidays in some dark corner. Consider this my present to you this Christmas – go listen to some metal and laugh inside at all those dumb fuckers that are running around now like chickens with their head cut off trying to get someone a present that they don’t even want.
Merry fucking Christmas
Since all ya’ll hate Christmas music so much, tune in on tuesday the 23rd, for my Christmas radio special! http://www.wvvy.org It’ll be a Heavy Metal/ non-trad christmas song good time! 2-4 p.m.
The worst thing that ever happened to me was on Christmas. Oh, God. It was so horrible. It was Christmas Eve. I was 9 years old. Me and Mom were decorating the tree, waiting for Dad to come home from work. A couple hours went by. Dad wasn’t home. So Mom called the office. No answer. Christmas Day came and went, and still nothing. So the police began a search. Four or five days went by. Neither one of us could eat or sleep. Everything was falling apart. It was snowing outside. The house was freezing, so I went to try to light up the fire. That’s when I noticed the smell. The firemen came and broke through the chimney top. And me and Mom were expecting them to pull out a dead cat or a bird. And instead they pulled out my father. He was dressed in a Santa Claus suit. He’d been climbing down the chimney… his arms loaded with presents. He was gonna surprise us. He slipped and broke his neck. He died instantly. And that’s how I found out there was no Santa Claus.
i hate the holidays because i never get “A Christmas with George Fisher” album.
I hate christmas for a slew of reasons:
Shitty weather.
Consumerism.
It brings out the worst in some people and makes others horribly depressed.
The original meaning and intent of the “holiday” has become lost and mostly forgotten.
I makes non-believers have to suck it up and grin and bear another family gathering full of God blesses and Amens.
Said non-believers get heckled for being scrooges and not having christmas spirit (and some of us go the Canadian route and apologize for a perfectly reasonable opinion that requires no apology, we just feel guilty)
Some people can’t see or be with their loved ones, and if the holiday didn’t exist it wouldn’t add to an already crappy winter.
Valentines day follows and also sucks.
Christmas music is annoying and starts earlier every year.
Santa is dumb and is everywhere. At least I can punch Santa. I can’t punch God. Though I do look like Jesus so I could punch myself.
Going to concerts in winter sucks, so even if a great band comes around near christmas, I don’t always want to go.
Oh yeah, and christmas shopping pretty much kills any extra money I might actually have.
I know the holiday will never go away but damn I wish it would. For those of you who celebrate it for the right reasons though, good for you, no sarcasm intended.
Christmas sucks because being surrounded by cheeseball shit everywhere is ridiculously annoying. Smiling plastic people trying to get me to buy stuff or Im a bad person, with horrifying sentimental Christmas music being played everywhere by people who are stupid and really really want to get into the Christmas spirit. Nah dude, that shit is weak. If Christmas was just a day where you could hang out with your family and friends and get fucked up in brother/sister hood, that would kick ass and be metal, as well as be legit and be a worthwhile holiday. What the fuck am I going to do with gifts if everyone hates me regardless? Exactly.
holidays ha holler days stay sober will you do this will you do that I didn’t want this you have to be nice impossible shopping circumstances ( crowds everywhere is out of everything traffic travel so on so forth)family when your family has told you get out for nearly twenty years and you end up walking around the streets till they are done celebrating bacause they don’t want you to darken their beautiful hollidays)
cops are fucking everywhere you can’t smoke and piss without being accosted by the man
telivision goes to shit and then you can’t even escape it by going to work uh mandatory days off which for some of us is without pay so not only have I spent all my money on my kid wife friends so forth so on I can’t even make money which makes me continue to be broke also sense we spent all our money to make holiday meals for 50 people we didn’t get anything else so once that meal is gone what now begging which leads to the people begging I am all for donation and have donated many times in my life but that is my choice I do not need you to be outside giving me dirty looks while I walk by you because I feel I should feed my own family first I personally lived on the streets it really isn’t that bad if it is for kids that different it’s not there fault the clothes trhe shitty music
I go out to eat the last thing I want to do is listen to come all ye faithful for the thousandth time
if you are married the word no not really or i don’t wanna don’t exist you wil are and have to
lets see we are destroying a mas abundance of trees which I hear is bad and when certain hollidays that may have nothing to do with you are happening there is nothing else open your fucked
you have christians celebrating the birth of christ wrong he was born more towards the spring so the whole concept is built on a falseity not to mention the fact that we have to lie or give into the lie and tell children that a fictional character that never existed is real only to watch them shattered a few years later around the same time when they find out it’s all bull shit
then there is always the why do we have to suffer prices are jacked up all over every thing is expensive as hell and no one gives a fuck about anything but themselves then to get to a point where you get what a gift that no one took the time to ask hey would you like that no they guess 9/10 times you got it or don’t want it but are still expected to be oh so happy “it’s the thought that matters”bull shit if you thought then I would be happy
so in some of the best words I have ever heard “you can cook your own turkey,wrap your own presents,and ride a one horse open sleigh to hell
hollywood bliss
Because they’re always fucking disappointing.
I hate the holidays because its turned into garbage! Very few people celebrate it for the real reason, they are too worried about what they are going to get! I have to spend all my money on presents when I could be buying guitar shit!
I love Xmas!
I mean c’mon…
When else can I get stuff delivered to me, because I’m the king of all I survey?
When else can I be surrounded by lights?
When else can I get booze soaked deserts?
When else can I get aways with ogling Mrs Claws, Lita Ford in a red catsuit or Santa’s Hawt Elves w/o getting beat up by the Mrs?
When else can I sit on another dudes lap w/o out getting beat up by my peers?
When else can I listen to Stryper w/o getting ridiculed for being soft?
So to sum up … 100 cd’s? …. better make it 101 bitches!
I AM the king of gimme and demand you pay homage!
Yeah, I pretty much hate the holidays. I’m not religious, I realize it is supposed to be about good ‘ol little baby Jesus, giving and being with family, but I hate the commercialization by all the stores.
I hate that Christmas displays go up right after Thanksgiving and possibly before in some stores. Can’t you wait until December for fucks sake? Not to mention the stupid bullshit that goes on during “Black Friday”, (No Dallas, it doesn’t have anything to do with you or God Forbid. ;) ) with people arguing and fighting over products, shooting each other over toys, trampling other people because that have to be first in line to get $5 off some crap.
I hate the ‘my dick is bigger than yours’ light displays at peoples homes. Yea, tons of lights and decorations that mean people want to drive by and look at them all and create traffic problems through neighborhoods. ‘Sorry kids, we can’t buy you any actual gifts this year because our electric bill is $1000 this month because I wanted to make sure we had more lights than anyone.’
Christmas music. Ugh. God damn Christmas music. Yes that is a blasphemous statement while talking about Jesus’ birthday, but come on. It can be tolerated at certain times or places but when it is weeks before Christmas and everywhere you go you have to listen to Christmas music. Walk in to 7-11, god damn jingle bells. Walk in to the grocery store, god damn deck the halls. Walk in to REI, god damn little drummer boy. On the radio every few songs. Aggghhh, enough already. And I really hate the ‘new/updated’ versions of Christmas songs. Some new pop band or vocalist recording a trendy/hip version or original song. Just shut up already. No more of “Grandma got run over by a reindeer”, no more of that damn Chipmunks Christmas song, and no more of Sandler’s “Hanukkah” song as well.
And I hate the Salvation Army hanging out in front of every store, bank, and post office in town ringing that little bell and asking for the donation every time you go out in public. “Hey, I donated at this store and at that store earlier, so piss off.”
So, yeah, that’s pretty much why I hate the holidays.
Bah Humbug.
First off I would like to say that every holiday i have had in the last 5 years has fucking sucked ass. I always go out of my way to hook up those i care for with gifts they actually want not fucking tube socks. Every christmas i end up getting the shaft, people buy me stupid fucking t-shirts that i don’t ever wanna wear because the only word association i can put to them is “queer”. After so many years of absolutely shitty fucking holidays this christmas got especially shitty due to the fact that my wife left me two weeks ago and kicked me the fuck out of my house. I never get to see my son unless the bitch needs a babysitter while she goes out and parties. I have had enough of the fucking holidays because every single fucking time people either give me “shit” or fucking “shit” on me. For this holiday season I absolutely say fuck christmas and everything it stands for because every christmas thats what i get is fucked and I’ve had it, now i have no home, no wife, and a part time child, HO HO HO to this stupid fucking holiday I will never celebrate again. Merry fucking christmas!
i fucking hate the holidays because it involves
family
crappy cheery music
religion
and me having to spend my money buying shit for people i dont even like
the holidays can fuck themselves
now gimme dem cds
I hate the holidays because it gives people an excuse to have pointless holiday contests. The whole season is driven by “gimme gimme gimme” and these contests only help enable the selfless-less mentality. Despite the fat man in red or “son of god”, the received message still disagrees with the broadcasted one, and the masses of greedy bastards is only multiplying. “Take take take” is all i hear, and unfortunately, have fallen into believing the same vile ideal. The season has only given people the need for want, a nearly insatiable hunger for material items that are newer better and nicer, and by typing this, i seem to be one of the commercial zombies. Way to fuck up an already broken thing.
I hate the holidays because it has continually become an excuse for people to throw away money. The economy is in shambles. Could it be because now the “holiday spirit” is more about spending money one doesn’t have on things on doesn’t need? Metal helped me to realize just how much shit people buy that they don’t need, so I try continually to be frugal and avoid all of this. Generally, I get by pretty well, but when the holidays come around, all of a sudden people expect me to buy meaningless presents for people who will do the same for me, and they get angry when I tell them there’s nothing I really want. I have all the clothes, movies, books, etc. that I need, because if I want something I buy it. But when the holidays come, materialism at it’s finest emerges and I hate every bit of it. Donate the money to charity or something. I think satan is more pleased than Jesus when the nation is suckered into spending kajillions of dollars yearly on downright shit. Tickle Me Elmo? damn. I bet that’ll be useful in a month. I hate the holidays because they downright ruin any respect I have remaining for our culture.
Whatever, I’ll tell you why I hate them. Cuz I’m broke!! Everyone went and got me a gift, and how fucking embarrassing is it when they give it to you and you’re like, “Sorry Dad, thanks for raising me and putting up with my shit for the past 24 years and all, but it was either buy you a gift, or buy another fucking box of Ramen fucking Noodles. Maybe God will bless me around Father’s Day or something.”
Bah fucking Humbug
And another thing, I got a damn Jack Lelanne fucking Power Juicer! What am I supposed to do, juice the shit out of my Ramen Noodles? A $100 gift. You want to really help me out, buy me a God Damn cow and a fucking meat grinder. I’ll do the rest.
Merry Christmas!
Why I hate the holidays…that’s a hard one, because there is just so much I dislike. I hate family gatherings. I have to see some of the most hated family members. All my cousins are spoiled little brats and are completely unappreciative. I hate how people think Christmas is all about presents. I hate greedy people in general actually. I hate having to repeat “Merry Christmas!” over and over and over and over again like a broken record with a fake smile on my face that clearly reads, “I don’t want to be here.” I hate all the holiday television specials, except a select few movies, of course. I just really don’t see the point in all the fuss over Christmas, and the holidays in general. Decorating, buying gifts, putting up special lights, and getting shitty personalized ornaments that are just pointless as a present, considering people take DOWN their trees after Christmas. And by the time the next holiday season rolls around, the ornament is old, broken, or lost. It’s all just so obselete to me, Christmas is just another day. Oh, and I’m not religious by any means, but the spiritual aspect of Christmas is now overlooked because of the materialistic needs of greedy people.
Happy Holidays.
i hate the holidays because of stupid things like this contest. why should we have to explain why we hate the holidays when everyday sucks!
JESUS SAVES. THANKS HOCKEYSTAINS. LOGS/FASKINGS