DEAR METAL BANDS: STOP BREAKING UP. BECAUSE YOU’LL INEVITABLY GET BACK TOGETHER.
Thursday, April 30th, 2009 at 4:45pm by Vince Neilstein
Our bro-bros at Metal Insider brought up a good point yesterday; what’s the point of saying your band is breaking up or going on hiatus if it don’t mean shit in the end? Srsly wtf lolz! With the pending Faith No More and Cave In reunions this Summer literally every band to ever break up that still has enough living members to do so — and even some without — is doing a reunion in some capacity. Last summer’s roster of reunionites included Carcass and At the Gates, amongst others. And don’t front; the Soundgarden reunion will happen eventually. I’d put money on it.
So I hereby declare a moratorium on breaking up. Artistic differences? Don’t wanna hear it. Tired of touring? Tell me that again in a year when your records ain’t selling, you’re flat broke and you’re tired of flipping burgers. Fucked a band member’s girlfriend? Kiss and make up, then have a threesome. Don’t give me no “on hiatus” crap either ’cause that’s just a way of pussyfooting around the fact that you do plan on eventually playing together again. Just say nothing! Is that so hard? Quietly disappear, then come back years later and take the world by storm. Your lives, and ours, will be henceforth be much more drama-free.
-VN
At the Gates needs to realize that they can still make good music…
Carcass needs to stop acting like At the Gates.
would like to point out that cave in never started with announcing a hiatus. people saw the band turn focus to their side projects and freaked out thinking the band was breaking up, so they had to clarify saying they had no intentions of breaking up and only then used the term hiatus.
And now that Devin is planning on touring again (with more Devy stage banter), who thinks that SYL will be back?
Very doubtful, Devin’s been pretty vocal about how he’s not going to regroup SYL. I honestly would be shocked as hell if he did.
Refused should follow this trend
FUCK YEAH!
But then what would metalsucks do for content? Amirite??
Sooo who’s next to reunite ? Pantera? Death? SOAD?
Dead things should stay dead, we will keep our good memories, they’ll keep whatever is left of they dignities.
I’d sell my nuts for a Coroner reunion.
Everyone is just increasingly less commitment-oriented, and it’s bleeding over into the metal world. It’s hard for bands to stay together when they eventually realize that it’s a terrible long-term career choice.
why the issue with “on hiatus”? when a band goes on hiatus, that means exactly that they’re planning to reunite at some point.
@ iolanach, ditto, sir, ditto. I would KILL to see that. hell, if cynic can come back after all these years, wny not them??
Bands should just use the tried-and-true Mustaine Method: fire people, hire new people, then fire those people and hire even more people. Nobody cares because you’re the main song writer anyway.
BOOM SHAKALAKA!
i’m pretty stoked about a FNM reunion, but without jim martin, i fear it will be more “album of the year” than “the real thing”. while some of their later stuff was decent, some of the worst shit i’ve ever heard came out of those years as well (seriously, i started a joke is maybe the single worst song i’ve ever heard, even if it was supposed to be funny). wait and see……..
Who do we blame for this reunion shit anyway… who did it first?
Sex Pistols?
Kiss?
Fleetwood Mac?
The fuckin Eagles?
Possibly that fuck who took John Lennon’s vocals and put out the unfinished Beatles song 15-20 years after he fuckin’ died.
Lynyrd Skynyrd, maybe?
I thought bands with dead guys didn’t count, as that’s not a ‘reunion’ then, right?
Too bad about that pus Beatles song.
How much money do these guys need; Jeez.
Though I thought the Anthology epic movie was kinda cool.
Cave In broke up?