ANYONE WHO SAYS DREAM THEATER ARE PUSSIES IS QUITE OBVIOUSLY A GIANT PUSSY
Tuesday, June 16th, 2009 at 10:38am by Vince NeilsteinI mean, James LaBrie is still a complete ham but there’s no denying he’s talented as fuck, and John Petrucci’s chin-whiskers are looking quite manly these days (trying to nail him down for a “Beard on Beard” interview… stay tuned). Myung’s a beast, Rudess is a fucking virtuoso and Mike Portnoy is like the best drummer EVVVARRR. Stop fronting, people! Anyone who claims Dream Theater are pussies / aren’t metal clearly has some kind of fear of being emasculated. Get over it and rock out, dicks! Show me a man that doesn’t get an erection during that heavy riff part of “Pull Me Under” (DAH-DAH dun dun dun dun dun dun dun) and I’ll show you a fucking liar.
Here they are performing that boner-worthy riff at Download Festival in the UK this past weekend (read our own Anton Oyvey’s full festival report here). And after the jump, the new song “A Rite of Passage” which comes from the new album Black Clouds & Silver Linings, out June 23rd on Roadrunner. Get manly; listen to Dream Theater.
-VN
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I’ve seen them three times. Bored as shit every time. I recognize the skill, they’re fucking intense.
Somewhere along the line though, they forgot how to right good songs. You are right about Pull Me Under, though.
And you need to learn to WRITE correctly.
Fucking douche, really? Grammar nazi? Piss off.
I’ve seen them a couple of times and both times I was blown away! Of course, I wasn’t expecting to see them run all over the place on stage and was just in it for the music. You don’t go see Dream Theater for stage presence. They did have trippy visuals projected behind them both times though :)
LaBrie still sucks donkey nuts. He’s boring and his voice DOES NOT work with the music at all! Other than that DT is bad-ass!
So what should he sound like? If he sucks then enlighten us to what he should sound like.
He shouldn’t sound like a little girl. He shouldn’t be singing rock/metal music at all; his tone is weak and thin. Almost anyone would be an improvement.
I’m actually inclined to agree with you on that. He is the weakest link of the band by far. In fact, I generally tune him out.
So what should he sound like? And he doesn’t sound like a little girl that is just you flexing your internet muscles. Should he scream and growl like nearly ever “singer” that comes out nowadays.
They came out in the late 80’s early 90’s so growls and screams weren’t the thing.
I think they have done a damn good job of sticking to their guns and not following trends throughout the years to stick around.
Which is funny to me that peeps worship Machine Head that was a Nu Metal band and now somehow they are legit cause they are changing the trend of being a metal band with guitar solos now.
He is a weak singer…sorry
That is why I like Symphony X better than DT. The SX singer has a similar style…but is talented
portnoy sings well.
Yes the vocals spoil it for me too.
dream theater are pussies
singer cant sing and the rest of the band cant write good enough to make it entertaining
i think the reason you got a boner is cause that chick pulled her shirt up.
They shred. But I fucking hate James’ voice. Sorry. Ultra Cheese.
I like Dream Theater but James sounds terrible live. It always seem such a stark contrast from recordings to live.
Um, yeah….this is the only time the words “Dream Theater” and “pussy” will ever be that close to one another. If I wanted to hear dorks show off how fast they can play scales, I’d hang out at Guitar Center.
It’s not so much James’s vocal timbre that bothers me, it’s that it’s too high for him now. He’s reeeeaaallly straining, so much so that he can’t articulate the words in the second verse anymore, and it sounds really bad. The old stuff is just too hard for him now, sadly.
most overrated band ever
you hit it there
all you retards need to get a life… go play any of that shit if you can… all u guys know to do is sit around in front of ur pc’s taking the piss out of dream theater when in reality, ur nothing but a bunch of good for nothing losers who need JOBS!
Saw them once. I was impressed and awed by the musicianship, bored with the presentation. And I was left wondering, “What does Labrie DO when he leaves the stage for 15 minutes while the band does the prog jam stuff? Fuck groupies? Eat a burger? Drop a deuce? Take a nap? Read Metalsucks?”
Looking at LaBrie of late, I’d say, “Eating burgers”.
I will never regret walking out during their set at prog nation 08.
hahaha i walked out too, opeth put me on such a high and dream theater was just killing it
That’s awesome, that’s exactly what I did too. How they were headlining over Opeth and BTBAM is beyond me.
not to mention their fans were really annoying. Most of them were 40 year old fat dudes with their satriani shirt wearing sons who kept saying they Didn’t “get” opeth.
Yeah that’s a fair observation. The show I went to there was a guy a couple rows over who had a guitar neck so he could shred along with Petrucci.
Most boring band ever. Actually IMHO every Prog band is boring as hell.
I’m not certain if a lot of these people bashing DT are old enough to have seen them 10-15 years ago or understand where Metal was back in the 90’s. There wasn’t a whole lot going on here in the US and the internet wasn’t the treasure chest of great music that it is now. When you were looking for something a little more creative & interesting, DT was offering that style. I admit that, nowadays(since “Train of Thought”), they have become a bit bland. They haven’t attempted to become more fusion like I thought they would,but, back in their “Heyday” DT was amazing. Honestly, I haven’t heard any singers that have kept up the vocal gymnastics as long as Labrie has,so, maybe it’s time that he retires.
As for anyone saying that “Prog” is mostly boring usually doesn’t have a clue about real “Prog” bands to begin with.
You nailed it, dude.
I dion’t think their pussies, their music just fucking sucks. They are perfect for all the shredtastic satriani, vai, malmsteem fans who dont give a shit about soul in music but love to see perfect execution!
I love when people make this statement.
Do you even play an instrument?
So there is SOUL in Lamb Of God, Or Slipknot?
To lump Satch, Vai, and Malmsteen with Dream Theater shows how little you know about music.
So let me guess cause Skolnick is technical that must mean Testament sucks too?
Kurt Cobain made this same silly statement.
I don’t know, when I listen to Dream Theater, I feel nothing. Simplistic, well written riffs often have much more soul and emotion behind them than perfectly composed virtuosic flights of fancy. Every Dream Theater fan I’ve ever met incessantly points out how great they are at playing. When a riff that they like comes on, instead of hoisting their beer and headbanging, they start blabbing about 5/8 time and phrygian modes. Dream Theater is one of those bands that can do it all, but they always have to show you that they can do it all. Simply put, they’re showoffs. I completely understand why some people, especially musicians, are into that kind of music but personally I feel like most of Dream Theater’s music lacks the primal instinct that makes metal so badass. And sure, they don’t sound like Satch, Vai, or Malmsteen but next time you go to a Dream Theater show you should count the number of people wearing shred-related t-shirts. DT is absolutely music for shred-heads.
Sure…It’s music for people who wanna think NOT stink. METAL has always been about being a technical badass whether it’s soul/blues influence or Neo-Classical influence. Just because I love Malmsteen doesn’t mean that I don’t “get” & love David Gilmour or Eric Johnson,but, even their style of Blues playing could be considered more technical than say Robert Johnson. So, does that mean they don’t have any soul?? Malmsteen prefers to write his stuff like a violin player. Have you ever seen how many notes a violin player can nail? I guess they don’t have any soul…
I meant “stink” as in getting lit like a Christmas tree…
their music isnt the same but their fan base is, people who almost always think the faster a guitar player is the better he is, and while this is obviously not always the case, in my experiences it almost always is. Also yes i play drums. And also I don’t like slipknot. And also i love testament. The difference to me is that testaments music doesn’t suck like dream theaters, they use their talent for good.
wow we wrote the same thing at the same time except you put it much more elequently haha
I think what he is trying to say is that it’s more interesting to hear somone bend one note and hold it for a minute (ala Hendrix on Band of Gypsies Machine Gun) then any shredder fly through a scale at warp speed.
Skolnick is a bad-ass, but I would like to point out that one of Testaments greatest CDs was with James Murphy on Low
As was The Gathering, which is imo their “other” best CD :P
You guys act as though the guys in Dream Theater go around calling themselves metal. They are a little outside the box of a traditional metal band. They have metal elements but they don’t claim to be this metal god like they created it last week.
And what is wrong with being a proficient musician? I listened to that BS when the whole Seattle scene came in. They claimed that everything from the 80’s had no soul.
So guys like Chuck From Death were always technical. No one gave him shit about it. It’s because they were Brutal?
So if you want simple hooks and sing along songs. How come you aren’t All Nickelback fans? They have guitars. They have guitar playing that won’t make you think what so ever.
They are a prog rock band. If you don’t get it fine. But saying how much they suck doesn’t make you cooler it just makes you look like a 12 year old.
i think the main point is that most of dream theater’s fans love them for their technical ability, not so much how the music makes them feel emotionally. Death fans on the other hand mostly feel a connection with the band that is deeper than, “wow crazy time sig!” And yes im making gross generalizations but its the internet we arnt gonna be getting into any fucking real conversations anyways
Dude, anybody that says they were blown away by Individual Thought Patterns just because of the emotional content of the music is blowing smoke up your ass! Andy LaRocque’s guitar work, Steve Digorgio’s(?) bass lines & Gene Hoglan’s drum work were a fucking blistering technical audio assault.
no, not just emotional content. Obviously technical ability is a huge part of metal, i just don’t like it when its the only part.
“So if you want simple hooks and sing along songs. How come you aren’t All Nickelback fans? They have guitars. They have guitar playing that won’t make you think what so ever.”
I just really hate the strawman fallacy, so I thought I’d point it out.
Because Nickelback suck?
i respect their talent, and Portnoy is a beast, but personally, synthesizer guitars and whailly opera vocals dont do it for me. I wish Portnoy could join another band so I could listen to him more.
but I might see dream theator with Dwizzle Zappa[zappa plays zappa] at the riverside in milwaukee…is it worth the $50?
Lars and Portony could have a ham-off.
The first 2 albums were really great. The songwriting was really solid back then. And live they killed as well. Since then they haven’t written any songs I thought were focused or coherent. Now its all noodling and jumping styles.
This pretty much nails it. I haven’t been able to really get into any of their later stuff. I love the first 2 discs, and still play them on occasion, but after that things seemed to have gotten stale.
Wow, this was an awful vocal performance.
Just can’t get into this band. They certainly aren’t pussies, but there music does nothing for me. Except for “Under A Glass Moon” which is amazingly kickass (and misleading, haha).
I was there, it was fucking boring. Talent is not always interesting.
My nerdy friends loved it though :D
sir, it would be good as just instrumental
the singer cant sing for shit..
the only thing worse than listening to LaBrie is listening to a DT fanboy…..hi JRTME!
Myung is over-rated.
OMG, I seriously hope that was a joke or you meant it in a sarcastic way.
Great band… Myung inspired me to shred harder with my fingers (I’m a bass player) back in the 90’s… LaBrie is probably the weakest link in the band live (at least in recent years), but they still kill it and YES they do write good songs.. I believe that Metropolis: Part 2 proves that they know how to write great melodies and hooks. Pull it out and give it a listen.
this is quite possibly one of the best things you guys have ever posted. they get so much shit when there are so many terrible bands getting recognized now, lets see who’s still around in 20+ years. sure the live vocals aren’t as good as the recordings as with most bands but i would never miss a chance to see them again.
Absolutely agree, can’t believe this is the same place where constant post about iwrestledacockonce and similar bands where ruining the page. Great post, it’s also funny to see it brought out all the haters.
Such a great band but what an ANOYING SINGER!
HE REALLY SUCKS BIG TIME!
i never undertood why this band never got ready of him, its still a mistery to me,
is pretty obvious that he is not at the level of the other members and that his
voice is just TERRIBLE.
Love the music hate the voice.
dream theater=cock rock
it’s too much “check us out, were fast and technical”, than “listen to this good song we wrote”.
i am a guitarist and i couldn’t give a shit about blasting arpeggios at lightning speed, it still needs to sound good and fit the song…
i think thats the whole reason i always like dimebag 1000 times better than almost any other guitarist, simply for the fact that everyone was up DT/Slayer/Satriani’s etc. ass because they are so fast, but their shit never catches you right. Dimes solos told a story, as gay as that sounds, and almost always fit the song…. you went on a ride, hills and valleys…. yes there was some showboating, but they were never about check out how badass “I” am, but more like “check out how well this solo fits this badass song”
any guitarist that takes that style over cock rocking penis measuring wankery is doing it the right way in my book
Man, I didn’t realize how bad LaBrie’s vocals had gotten. Especially when he sings the “Pull Me Under” chorus.
Yeah, the vocals are pretty horrendous… give me a vocalist like Mathias Blad from Falconer or Joakim Brodén from Sabaton any day over LaBrie.
Still, that aside, Dream Theater writes some truly killer songs, and I’m eagerly awaiting the new album.
This is totally unrelated, but here’s some guys making beer from water, lol.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NJCzVN3deY
I’ve seen DT 4 times so far. Love them live, no they’re not jumping around, but that’s not the type of band they are. James is the vocalist, he’ll probably remain their vocalist so deal with it. Yes they’re PROG, they’ve never claimed to be METAL, they’re just DREAM THEATER.
Ordered the box set, can’t wait to hear it…
props to vince for posting this. someone needed to say it.
i’m sick and tired of all the douchebags who say that dream theater is all over-technical, super-fast, emotionless, show-off rock. have any of you guys even listened to them before, or are you just following this stupid fucking trend of hating on a band just because they are known for their technical ability? sure, they can shred up a storm when they want, but it’s all done in a melodic way. if you can sit through an entire dream theater song such as octavarium, learning to live, or the glass prison, and still say you don’t like them, then fine. they just don’t do anything for you. but i honestly doubt that you would be able to truthfully say that they “suck” after listening to those songs.
I just saw these guys at Guitar Center blowing each other.
Easily the most boring band in existence “Oh let’s stand around doodling our instruments for thirty fucking minutes”
Are you fucking kidding me?
The only people who really like Dream Theater are teenage kids trying to learn guitar. I guess if you only know guitar tab and don’t know shit about music theory or whatever their shreddy nonsense might blow your mind but anyone who listens to jazz is not going to be phased. Besides these guys are like professors not rockers. Shouldn’t you douchebags be giving a lecture on tonal harmony at a conservatory somewhere? I don’t think Slash or Jimi Hendrix would really come out with a bunch of beginners guitar DVDs or whatever, that shit’s too gay for real rockstars.