And I really wanted to like them, because Demi Lovato told me that they rock…

Well, at least the drummer’s cool.

but to me, everything about this band smacks of insincerity and they seem utterly and completely manufactured for the sole purpose of taking your money. which i suppose is an admirable thing to do, but it’s nothing that i believe is worth aspiring to if you are actually trying to be a worthwhile human being.

1998 – every time i die forms

1999 – 2002 – every time i die puts out a bunch of shit no one cares about.

2003 – every time i die releases “hot damn!”. they release two singles from this album, “ebolarama” (which no one gives a shit about) and “i been gone a long time”, the latter of which nearly instantly influences most every shitty screamo band with its elvis-circa-motorhead swagger, most notably with artists like he is legend and these douchebags: http://www.myspace.com/thehollyspringsdisaster. this is also the year that maylene vocalist is “asked to leave” underoath. possibly because he rocks too much. possibly because he eats his own shit.

2004 – maylene and the sons of disaster form.

August 23, 2005 – Every Time I Die releases “Gutter Phenomenon”. It is a hit with retarded kids who like to pretend they grew up listening to Skynyrd instead of Green Day.

October 25, 2005 – Maylene & The Sons of Disaster releases their self-titled album, brilliantly riding on the coattails of music Every Time I Die put out two years before.

March 20, 2007 – Maylene & The Sons of Disaster finally do something before Every Time I Die & release their second album, aptly titled “II”.

September 4, 2007 – Every Time I Die release “Gutter Phenomenon 2″…I mean…”The Big Dirty”. It is not clear whether it is a reference to the Trailer Park Boys movie or waking up on a tour bus, only to find Keith Buckley’s cock shoved into your ass.

You don’t the meaning of the word “verbatim.”

“Lifeless” and “uninspired” are two horribly subjective terms. These are not facts, merely your opinion.

The song and video being “badass” are more than the summations of their wardrobe and hair.

You’re an idiot.

http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/index.php/2009/07/22/breaking-maylene-and-the-sons-of-disaster/

I couldn’t view this at work and had to wait until I got home. Being from the South myself (Birmingham, specifically), when the comments in this thread mentioned that it parodied “Deliverance” I was hesitant to even bother with this video. I figured I would reserve judgment until I saw the video. Having seen it, I will say this: If they did this to exploit the world’s perception that we’re all ignorant, inbred hillbillies, the band would have earned nothing but my enmity for their efforts. The way they did this, though, makes me think that they did it to OWN that perception (in other words, as a kiss-off to prejudicial fuckwits). If that is indeed the case, then they might have just earned my respect. Regardless, the song is fun.

If nothing else, I respect the balls it took for them to run around in their underwear in a video to be saved for posterity and countless people to watch as many times as they want. They must be swinging low and heavy.

The day Dallas Taylor left UnderOath was the day that band went 2 and half inward somersault head first into the shitter.

If theres a god these guys wont go the way of the 15-17 year old mainstream horseshit