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Hair Metal Happy Hour, New Shit

THIS JUST IN: LITA FORD STILL SUCKS

 Friday, August 14th, 2009 at 10:00am by

litaford

Never been a Lita Ford fan. Always thought she sucked. Has nothing to do with hating chicks in metal or whatever – Lita Ford just happens to suck.

So. Ford is now trying to make a comeback and has a new album coming out in October, and is now streaming a song from said new album. The song is called “Crave,” and, hey, guess what? It’s terrible. Shocker.

Like so many people who were famous in the 80s, Ford has made the mistake of trying too hard to sound like she’s hip, relevant, and aware of how music has changed in the years since anyone last gave a shit about her. And, honestly, I don’t really know if it matters at this point. ‘Cause on the one hand, I doubt Ford is gonna make many (if any) new fans at this point anyway, and those of her old fans who actually have been craving (pun intended) a comeback will probably buy whatever she releases regardless. On the other hand, since that fanbase is her bread n’ butter anyway, I kinda think she might be better off just releasing an album that sounds exactly like one from her heyday. I mean, isn’t that what whatever’s left of her fanbase would want anyway?

On the off-chance that you care, Lita’s latest, Wicked Wonderland, drops October 6.

-AR

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  • Hammer_Smashed_Hurtt

    Couldnt agree more. She my friends, is a re-tard.

    First Post.

    • so ture

      she needs to go find a meat whistle to mooch off of and support her habits.

  • Gary S.

    Axl, you’re a sexist pig.

  • Burton C. Bell’s Forehead

    Thank fuck for that, I thought I was the only one who hated her!

  • Fufkin

    Lita and former fiancé Tony Iommi ‘jamming’

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YRgGO3fyhRI

    Just because.

  • John Jaspers

    Id rather see her than THE BLED.
    At least she has metal cred.

  • http://www.welovemetal.com We Love Metal

    Not a major fan either, but I thought this song was great to be honest. Much better then anything in her past specially with the backing vocals. I usually don’t disagree with the mansion shut ins, but in this case…

  • bucketochicken

    Lita Ford should be the soundtrack to this website: http://www.trashheaven.com

    Lita, you didn’t get laid because you’re trashy as fuck, you got in a fight because you’re trashy as fuck, and your name is “Lita” because you’re… well, trashy as fuck. You probably smell like cigarettes and have a lot of bad, stretched-out tattoos.

    • Deanne

      Oh my God That was a great laugh! Bucket…you are hilarious…and right!!!!

  • Johnny

    Awful song, and the backing vocals from her husband (JIm Gilette from Nitro, you know FREIGHT TRAIN COMING YEAAAAAAAHHHH) are disgusting. The fact that the song tries to be dancy is horrible, sorry Lita but this is not good.

  • ceth

    while clearly not my favorite thing i have listened to this week, I have listened to worse stuff than that that has been RECOMENDED by this site.

  • Canvas Of Flesh

    I’d rather listen to Miss Ford’s work than most of the emo-core shit that’s been recommended on this site.

  • g

    Anyone have a clue as to why Bumblefoot and his drummer are involved in this shitty mess?

  • b-rad

    she was useless… she never did anything of consequence without the help of someone else. what were 2 big songs? “close my eyes forever” which was a duet with Ozzy and “kiss me deadly” which was a cover song originally done by former Billy Idol vehicle, Chelsea. the only thing she did successfully was make Samantha Fox look “classy”

    • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

      Billy Idol was never in Chelsea…though some of the members did form Gen X

  • You Don’t Know Me

    Nice… Lita Ford jumping on a bandwagon that died out a good 7 or 8 years ago. This is HORRIBLE!!!

  • http://www.roxwel.com Pick-Axe Bobby

    That is wholly unlistenable.

  • Deejster

    Lita’s solo career music may have been poppy glam metal has not aged very well, but she could really shred that guitar (I think Guitar World magazine once ranked her the greatest female rock guitarist of all time). Plus, she was smokin’ hot back in the 1980s. I’m sure that the music video for “Kiss Me Deadly” helped many teenage metalheads in the 1980s get through puberty.

    • buster poindexter

      ^ like me

    • Porkspam

      let’s be real, you settled for jerking off to “the grind” back then

    • Johnny

      she really isn’t THAT great of a guitarist, she’s O.K. She certainly is no shredder.

  • http://hookinmouth.net Hook In Mouth

    I did’;t want to be all negative and shit when I listened to the song, but yeah, I thought it sucked too. Seems like, as Axl said, she’s trying too hard to be hip. She’s far too old to try to reach back and sound and look young again. Loved the Duet with Ozzy, but Lita needs to just tour and do her old shit for her old fans…like every other washed up, 80′s has-been.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Dasher/30826541 Matt Dasher

    It doesn’t matter what she does. She made enough money in the 80s that she’s now retired in the Caribbean, has two kids and is making this album for herself since she simply doesn’t need the cash. Much like Metallica with Load, she already won and can do whatever the fuck she wants. It’s just taken her over a decade for her to actually want to do anything.

    Currently waiting for The Nemesis Theory and After Forever to reunite…

  • sYgnal

    A little late with the Gravity Kills sound, huh?!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ron-Stanevich/1508887384 Ron Stanevich

    yeah this song sucks