FOR RAMMSTEIN, SIZE DOES MATTER IN PORNOGRAPHIC NEW MUSIC VIDEO (NOT SAFE FOR WORK!!!)

Thursday, September 17th, 2009 at 10:10am by Vince Neilstein

rammstein - pussyIf this is a publicity stunt to get people talking about the band after such a long time away, it’s working. The outrageous album artwork was only the tip of the, um, iceberg… Rammstein have gone and released a 4-minute porn flick and called it a music video.

“You have a pussy, I have a dick-uh! So what’s the problem? Let’s do it quick.” Add funny German accents, lots of tits, pussy, bondage, and a song that’s so ridiculously over the top, cheesy and catchy… and I’d say we’ve got a winner!

Rammstein seem to want  you to visit their website to watch the video — or, rather, I guess the uncensored version is way too obscene to ever get through YouTube’s screens — so check it out here, then come back and tell us what you think. Wow.

-VN

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103 COMMENTS on “FOR RAMMSTEIN, SIZE DOES MATTER IN PORNOGRAPHIC NEW MUSIC VIDEO (NOT SAFE FOR WORK!!!)”

  1. permafrost says:

    These guys are a riot! The song is typically good Rammstein… Can’t wait to read the comments on this one!

  2. Gary S. says:

    Could you throw this video behind a jump or something? The preview still is NSFW. People wont be able to even visit the MS homepage without a visit from their IT dept.

  3. builtforsin says:

    HOLY SHIT.

    Actual hardcore porn, even cum shots (yes, plural)!

  4. Canvas Of Flesh says:

    Hmmm. Not sure what to think of the video, but the song itself is utter shit.

  5. WetBiscut says:

    Put the video over the jump…even the preview is NSFW.

  6. Dort Am Klavier says:

    Ich busted eine nut. Heil Rammstein.

  7. yep says:

    Best video ever.

  8. K-milo says:

    I really feel the song is crap… And the “hardcore” is indeed a publicity stunt (Just like setting themselves on fire). But I’m gonna see them next year.

  9. Benito says:

    speechless.

  10. Dave says:

    When your music is this shitty, these are the lengths you’ll go to for publicity.

  11. tyler09 says:

    vid of the year

  12. poopsmcgee says:

    haha boobies!

  13. You Don't Know Me says:

    seriously… get rid of the screen shot. it’s making your website not work safe.

  14. Muro says:

    Bwa-ha-ha-ha….it’s the most explicit/absurd/brilliant marketing maneuvre I´ve ever seen in Metal….still…it has to work ’cause it’s the first time I’ve ever listened to a whole Rammstein song…(It’s the first time something else has happened to me while listening to Rammstein but that be too much info)

    Regards.

  15. lkgf09 says:

    its not the best song ever but rammstein has always made these sub par songs for the sake of comedy. they just usually never release it as the single. the rest of the new album should be killer.

  16. Bicro says:

    Raising the bar again.

    Hail Rammstein!

  17. ofekk says:

    rofl..thats so rammstein!

  18. Driven9 says:

    Pathetic Publicity stunt from a WAY OVERRATED band. Seriously, when was the last (or Only) time they put out something with substance. boring.

    • Anthony says:

      Mutter

      • Versysrider says:

        Awesome, as usual they don’t take themselves seriously. As for “When was the last time they put out something of substance”! When was the last time they put out anything less than awesome!

        They are a great band, will be seeing them in Feb at the LG Arena, maybe at 48 I will be the oldest Rammstein fan there!

        Hell who cares, they rock!

  19. All Out War says:

    That ones going in the spank bank.

  20. orbital says:

    I like porn. I don’t like Rammstein.

  21. chase says:

    Hey that might get a dick oscar for best video and music although i dont know if that is metal

  22. Anthony says:

    Did they all get in a room together and say “Alright guys, how can we make sure our next music video doesn’t get played on any video channels?”

  23. vikingfromhell890 says:

    Hahaha. Yeah, it’s Rammstein. I guess this is what you get when you have a band like them and the director of the Prodigy “Smack My Bitch Up” video.

  24. Don’t like their music, but these guys are genius. Hysterical vid.

  25. Rammstein are always good for some mindless headbanging. Their music is a no-brainer, really. Still, I didn’t know how they would go further than the Man Gegen Man video, and well… they did. Which makes me wonder – how will they stretch the envelope now?

  26. ooo says:

    am dying right now. just try not to take it so seriously. it’s not meant to be a metal masterpiece as evidenced by its tongue in cheek presentation. i mean they gave flake lorenz lady parts for fucks sake. if that video was put to a serious violent metal song, it would just be disturbing, but its not. the song is supposed to be fluffy and silly. let them have their fun and try to enjoy it for what it is; a hilariously over the top song and music video. thanks rammstein.

  27. The song is really shitty. I’ll never grow used to the stupid, stupid sounding chorus. It doesn’t even sound like a real German accent, just kinda retarded.
    I’m sure the rest of the album will rock, though. This song is just a failed attempt at rocking AND sounding mainstream-ish.

    The video is amazing though. I don’t know if they ever actually fucked those girls or if it’s all editing and porn-footage, but is pretty convincing.

    Outrageous.

  28. canea says:

    good stuff. Shit song but I’m sure they didn’t mean for it to be anything else.

  29. Zosimus says:

    Wow. Electric Six have really upped the ante.

  30. Gospel of Madness says:

    I’ve never been a fan of Rammstein due to their simplistic music, the only reason they caught on here in the states is because they sing in German, which goes over big especially with kids who think masks and metalcore is actually worth listening to.

    Not taking this seriously, it was a good video, but then again, it had ass and tits in it.
    If Slipknot put more ass and tits in their videos I would have better things to say about them as well.

  31. alliaphagist says:

    so…was that unsimulated?

  32. Brytallica says:

    Greates rock video ever!

  33. Timothy says:

    Groundbreaking.

  34. Nate says:

    Ummmmm that had a cumshot… LOL.

    Id totally fuck all those girls though…

  35. Was the shemale the same one from Old Greg and Shoes?

  36. metalliman says:

    Pretty good :D

  37. zl6 says:

    complete and utter shit song/ video alike.. and i thought family values was bad..

  38. TheHangingBrain says:

    I can’t help but love these mooks, good live show as well. Saw them in Cleveland on the Mutter tour.

  39. Bill says:

    wow. that is the only video they could have made to make you almost not notice how awful the lyrics are.

  40. Jesse Menard says:

    hahaha fuck yeah rammstein

  41. DaylightReckoning says:

    I can’t help but empathize with Rammstein’s plight in this song. For you see, I too have never engaged in intercourse while visiting the fine country of Germany.

  42. Nightime says:

    Looks like they just kicked themselves out the music business.

    Not that great a song and an even worse attempt at porn.

  43. Brammy says:

    HAHAHAH.
    oh my god, see even the ones of you who complain have fed the machine, negative comments are still a reaction, its giving them more exposure.
    Shame, I think the song has a good instrumentation to it, has Tils voice got weaker?
    I doubt its real…….. but whatever, its going to get them loads more exposure, well in the non nude way……

  44. Ryoko says:

    “You’ve got a pussy, I’ve got a dick-ah/So what’s the problem?/Let’s do it quick”

    I really like Rammstein. I’m probably one of their biggest fans. And I appreciate the philosophy that’s present in “Pussy”: it’d be awesome if hooking up was that simple.
    But I’m listening to that the chorus of that song, and I’m thinking “It took them four years to come up with that? That sounds like some shit I would come up with in high school, when I was bored to death during Algebra and couldn’t stop thinking about how much I wanted to fuck the girl sitting in front of me. In other words, rather sophomoric. Did I really wait, patiently and loyally, for FOUR YEARS just to hear that? It’s a little bit insulting to a fan like me.”
    I’m just hoping the rest of the album makes that wait worthwhile.

  45. beardy says:

    I’m moving to germany

  46. Sandy Duncan's Glass Eye says:

    The best part of this is the age-confirmation click-thru screen. “I approve to be of full age” sounds like something that should be on http://www.engrish.com.

    That dumb chorus is really catchy…I keep finding myself saying “I have a dick-ah” as a I walk around the house. This song plus alcohol could lead to problems.

  47. Publicity stunt.. yes.

    So what?
    EPIC WIN!

  48. Capt.Bastrd says:

    Well… now I’ve seen every member of a band I listen to (their older stuff, at least) cum. Alright then.

  49. SeanN says:

    Damn. I rubbed out a few watching this vid!

  50. CYN1C says:

    They’ve sure have come (pun intended) a long way since Herzeleid. Can’t say I like it.

  51. John Saathoff says:

    Kanye was wrong…Rammstein in fact have the best video ever made

  52. Anselmowitz says:

    Nah beyonce had the best video, but this one is still good.

  53. beardy says:

    STUNT COCK!

  54. Rui says:

    1. Now *that’s* freedom of speech (I’d like to see a US band try to pull this off…)
    2. Now *that’s* funny (the German do have a great sense of humor, stop the stereotype)
    3. Now *that’s* courage (everyone goes apeshit when some pop musician goes commando or flips a boob, but that’s nothing!!! Google images for “peter steele playgirl magazine” for something more)

    • Joe says:

      Um, you know thats actually boosting a stereotype of Germans, that all germans are into sick sex, heavy drinkining/ besides the typical Nazi nostalgia dilema of course. Still, wish they could have thought of something more interesting than a 4 min. porno.

  55. drumb says:

    I like how the keyboard-player(that they ALWAYS rip on) has boobs.
    Classic.

  56. whatever says:

    ridiculous song, silly video. all you wankers that never fucked anyone must love it!
    4 years waiting for a piece of garbage like this.
    what is disturbing is the synth song in the chorus. cheesiest shit I’ve heard from them.
    I used to like the band but this made me change my mind.
    I’m ashamed of having liked this band…hope everyone I told about them forgets I actually recommended them…

  57. -gODGRINDER- says:

    I’ve been a Rammstein fan for a long time.

    I’m not sure I’m on board with this one.

    The song sucks, and I’m pretty sure I could have gone my entire life without seeing any of the band members’ junk.

  58. Coming to your city in 2010 — Rammstein on ice!

  59. Fluff says:

    Am I the only one that noticed the man with big lady boobs having sex with an other woman? Because that was kinda… weird
    I mean
    He had a beard
    And long blonde hair
    and glasses
    and boobs
    and a dick?
    WTF?

    • Shpadoinkle says:

      That’s what most German girls look like. Some of us have even moved on and reproduce asexually. And this time, ve vill conquer ze world!

  60. Fluff says:

    Not sure if the man or you scares me the most now Shpad.
    But for some reason I’ve seen this music video a milion times now to spot the naked man-lady…
    Who is the freak I ask…

  61. kanson says:

    come on guys… lets have sense of humor… the song is not bad at all… plus .everybody likes porn… so just lets wait for the full album and then we can talk about it…..

    PS: IT WILL BE WORST IF THE LYRICS SAY SOMETHING LIKE:

    I have a pusy…. you have a dick….. so whats the problem…. eat me quick….

    NOW THAT WOULD BE GAY AND UNACCEPTED…..lol

  62. SourDeez says:

    I’ve always found this band hilarious. They’re definitely not a band to be taken seriously. I don’t think they want you to take them seriously. They’re a party band for sure, even though they have some dark undertones. I put them in the same category as GWAR: Boring music on it’s own, but a great spectacle.

  63. Smurtz says:

    Enjoy the best parts of the videoclip

    http://www.megaupload.com/?d=PTOK4EUR

  64. crichton76 says:

    This is so funny and i was actually gobsmacked at the end of the vid because i wasn’t too sure what i had just seen.(well they say wanking makes you blind!) This is just rammstein having a laugh and why the hell not. Cant wait for the album

  65. NoRb4k says:

    Good for a wank if you turn off the pathetic music

  66. fran says:

    the song is rubbage…they are basically phoning it in….
    the video, for all the boys, is sure to give them hard-ons.
    but musically, this track is like the worse crap the band has ever produced.
    Great band though, they look like they were having loads of fun making the video!

  67. fran says:

    Oh yeah, I am planning to move to Germany, Berln to be exact!

  68. Some Random Dude says:

    thats the longest i’ve ever listened to a rammstein song.

  69. Anyone who jerks it to this video is pathetic. It’s fucking RAMMSTEIN, for Christ’s sake. It’s like masturbating to Fred Durst’s sex tape.

  70. will says:

    i saw this awhile back. but upon seeing it tonight, i am inclined to think that somethings can’t be lost in translation

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