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What the fuck??

HOW TO DRESS SEXY SCENE & BE HOT!

 Thursday, October 8th, 2009 at 9:30am by

Wow. Has it really come to this? Instructional videos to make sure that, God forbid, you don’t “come off as a prep or, even worse, a goth [eyeroll]?” What’s next, Joan Rivers on the red (black?) carpet of the Outburn Awards? “3OH!3! 3OH!3! What are you wearing?”

I realize it sounds like I’m angry; actually, I’m laughing so hard I’m doubled-over in pain. Sergeant D’s Stuff You Will Hate once again scores major props for sifting through all this shit to find the gems.

-AR

  • TurdFerguson

    I’d give that chick a pearl necklace.

  • hotel

    maybe if I try hard enough, I can murder though the internet

    • Driven9

      Lets work together on this. There is so many things wrong with what I just saw

    • Double D

      HAHAHAHAHAHA! HOLY SHIT! That is the funniest thing I’ve heard on metalsucks in a LONG, LONG time.

      • hotel

        we will be the Avengers Of Scene, kinda like super heros, but with way looser pants, they shall be destroyed!…….after we convince them to have sex with us

      • orbital

        fucking LOL!!!

      • Gaia

        Ah he is clowns, he makes me laughs.

  • http:/www.myspace.com/johnnysrideishere mikeyv

    “cop-style sunnies”
    AVIATORS?!

    i have issues with EVERYTHING SHE SAID

    • Uglymicrowave

      This bitch isn’t even taking her own advice

      she looks like she listens to Weezer….

      fucking poser

  • canea

    Thank God I can still wear my Batman shirt!!!

  • Burton C. Bell’s Forehead

    EmoWorldTV.com??? What the fuck??? I’m just going to watch the new Converge video again instead of this rubbish…

    • http://stuffyouwillhate.com SergeantD

      LOL @ Converge being the antidote to trendy scene bullshit!

      • jxk

        +1

        good call!

  • dude

    i am now dumber for having watch this video

  • ceth carter

    where exactly is the scene????? what is the scene? and for fucks sake when did the word scene become an adjective?????dress scene….. I dont get it. Its really funy that posers try so hard to not be posers that they end up being bigger more stupid posers. Everything is wrong with that video. I have to go clense my mind.

    • hotel

      wow, you kinda hyper right?….too much suger in your question marks, im questioned out…hold back on the tasty sweetness…DIABETES BRO!!

  • http://infinitybasement.wordpress.com Jon Lewis

    dudes… 1,293RD! i didn’t wanna be that guy.

    • I

      HAHAHA, it’s been driving me crazy too. But I was just gonna keep my mouth shut.

  • snarly

    shit on your face.

  • Mark Gavin

    I tried to follow these steps, but I just don’t look good in a tutu :(

    • Beard

      Its ok. I keep busting the seams of my uber-tight pants and I have runs in my stalkings.

      • Jo

        hit the tread mill fattie

  • vecima

    I thought I hated the whole emo thing a little to much.

    now I know I could never hate it enough.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jason-Shaw/617521768 Jason Shaw

    …now I’m going to go take a handful of aspirin, sit in a warm bath, and open some veins. I can’t believe this exists, furthering my predilection towards deep-seeded misanthropy and wishing horrible things on mankind

  • Rancidcorpse

    Im not….reading off….a ….. cue card…..

    • veganisvegetarian

      1

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Leo-Dawson/1032964778 Leo Dawson

    I found the way she talked really disconcerting. A kind of quiet, intense retardness.

    • http://stuffyouwillhate.com SergeantD

      Hahaha perfect characterization!

  • http://stuffyouwillhate.com SergeantD

    Dudes this is just the tip of the iceberg, there are zillions of “scene tutorials” on YouTube and elsewhere, it’s kind of a big part of scene culture (as bizarre as it seems to us). For example:
    http://www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Scene-Kid
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOm-EI–KJA (this is self-aware, but not a joke)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3ajepmWWOc (focused on hair and style)

    • hotel

      I feel sexually aroused, but in a kinda, dahmerist way…and how newly driven holes as fashion piercings shall bring glee to my hatred and also force loving ways.

  • kjetil

    “black converses with or without shoelaces is also scene, but it has become so popular, you may come off as a poser” – I laughed hard

    • http://www.last.fm/user/groverXIII groverXIII

      Dammit, I was wearing black Chucks before they were popular and you could get them for around 20 or 25 bucks… now that all these fucking kids are wearing them, they’re 45 bucks. Fucking ridiculous.

  • Captain Wookie

    I really cannot come up with any words that truly and accurately describe how much that video made my brain hurt. However, it doesn’t surprise me that this kind of garbage exists online, the lambs need something to follow.

  • TonyT

    hah….she said “mature scene girl”….the only scene bitches ive ever seen are high schoolers

  • OBEY1019

    hahahahaha this girls a such a fucking dork!!!!

  • http://www.last.fm/user/M60Patton Patton

    I’m just gonna stick to black band t-shirt+blue jeans. This is actually getting terrifying.

  • MightierBlue

    “However, be careful of the black Converse as they might make you look like a poser…”

    You mean, an entire scene of posers has rules about how not to look like a poser? And it involves Chuck Taylors? You’re shitting me?

    And “Mature scene girl”? What is that? A seventeen year old?

    That’s it, I’m locking my baby daughter in a room and not letting her out til she’s thirty.

    • ZOMG

      17 is good ‘nough for me. Statutory rape just got lowered to 16 in my state. juniorhigh FTW!

      8===========D ~ ~ ~ O;

      • Jo

        woooooo. your a pedo for the lose

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/MizzDanielle-Seckzmuffin-Hodson/1639890015 Mizz’Danielle Seckzmuffin Hodson

          +1

          This guy’s a loser.

          But then.. So is that chick.
          Do you think she realizes how retarded she sounds?

  • timmah

    Perhaps they could make a video on suicide methods for scene kids, complete with real life demonstrations.

    Axl can dream about weed porn, I can dream about the self-removal of the scene kids :(

  • headbanger

    im so sad right now….. fuck i thought it was an accident ending up emo.. got to listen to som hardcore now, need the good vibes

  • Reznik

    That was pure bullshit

  • Heavy Metal

    ah i love scene girls. That whole website is just as terrible. I want to know what entity is behind these videos “advising” people to become scene and emo because its cool.

  • TonyT

    I just wanted to let you guys know: I love metal, and this video reminds me why. None of this stupid fucking shit telling u what you should look like or whats cool and what isnt…such garbage.

    • http://stuffyouwillhate.com Sergeant D

      LOL, metal nerds are like a zillion times more uptight and stangry than scene kids. For example you are nerdraging right now over these videos because they’re “stupid fucking shit.”

      • TonyT

        what the fuck?? no….ive never heard a metal kid giving out fashion tips, because its not part of the “culture” of metal. I may dress or act a certain way, and if that falls under the category of “metalhead” then so be it, but im not doing it to fit what i THINK im supposed to look like, which is what theyre doing and what I have a problem with.

  • TheHardG

    What the FUCK?? These people need to be stopped at all costs.

  • uLy

    I”ve seen some of their other videos and i don’t think it’s real. i think it’s tongue and cheek.

  • vecima

    your mom is tongue and cheek.

  • metalchick666

    i feel like my IQ has been lowered by about fifty points…

  • GoGoGoreGadget

    that whole video is just god awful horseshit
    i dont mind ppl that want to look different and all and hell im one of those ppl that look different with my gauged ears and flat brimmed had but come on…
    when you need a training video to be something as gay as scene you deserve to be shot in the mouth with a sawed of shotgun.

  • GoGoGoreGadget

    that whole video is just god awful horseshit
    i dont mind ppl that want to look different and all and hell im one of those ppl that look different with my gauged ears and flat brimmed had but come on…
    when you need a training video to be something as gay as scene you deserve to be shot in the mouth with a sawed of shotgun……