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THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN OF CRYSTAL VIPER, THE BEST BAND ON THE PLANET

 Thursday, October 15th, 2009 at 10:00am by

I first wrote about Crystal Viper back in March, and they’re still one of the most amazing discoveries I’ve made this year. Now they have a new video and… I mean… Have you ever seen a video more metal than this?!?!? I mean, more metal and also made for two dollars U.S. and the band’s best ass. ‘Cause I think that’s what they traded for the pyro.

-AR

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  • http://www.gamesmeetmetal.com Gamesmeetmetal.com

    My God! It’s a Blind Guardian tribute band fronted by Mariah Carey! RUN!!!

  • Driven9

    LoL at the guitarist wearing their own merch. … and this band is awful

    • http://www.last.fm/user/M60Patton Patton

      Its alright to wear your own band’s merch in europe, and they are pretty awful.

  • Erek

    If you guys actually liked this — it’s difficult some times while wading through the sarcasm that drips from this site to determine if you guys are serious or not — you might want to check out Stormwarrior and Persuader.

    Stormwarrior – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKN6__eYvAo
    Persuader – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBYmRtYYhNI

    • Zoker

      Actually I’m pretty sure Axl was being sarcastic…

      Anyway Persuader is an awesome band… you people should really check em out.

  • Sir Robert

    I think the singer sounds just a bit like Doro Pesch. Which is just fine, because Doro Pesch kicked ass in Warlock.

    Incidentally, I don’t know why Crystal Viper have been singled out by Metalsucks. They’re a pretty average and average-sounding power-metal band. Hell, even the name is pretty standard fare, compared with a band like Custard or Pink Cream 69.

  • Facebook User

    i would marry that girl in a second

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mark-Gavin/1396340262 Mark Gavin

    I was not expecting Power Metal. It’s average power metal, but I was still not expecting Power Metal.

  • http://lordsofmetal.nl/index.php?lang=en Cavorka

    Best band on what planet? Does this band come from Mars?
    I wouldn’t mind fucking their singer in the mouth though….

    • Phil

      Make that two.

  • Slayer Boner

    I’d plow the singer…only once though…couldn’t take the “serious” band talk about this poop sandwhich

  • Zoker

    Since I think the post about Red Chord streaming a new song is on its way on MS, I’ll say it right away: this song is much better than that.

  • Fufkin

    This is the future.

  • http://www.myspace.com/breathofmetalproductions pokesmot

    reminds me on Sinergy

  • http://www.roxwel.com Pick-Axe Bobby

    This band is the metal equivalent of Tia Carrera’s band Crucial Taunt from Wayne’s World.

  • Kuranes

    I’m not a real power metal fan but I kind of like this. She has some pipes on her. And that video is awesome, but Smokey Bear would not approve.

  • NoNameNoSlogan

    awful

  • Ryan

    good band. but a complete Iron Maiden rip off. sounds way too much like Maiden to ever get any traction and success

  • http://www.underground-industries.uk.com Civi

    I just think its funny how they leg it from the pyro like its going to set them on fire

  • Elliott

    sounds like bruce dickinson pre-puberty…haha