I WOULD HAVE LOVED TO HAVE BEEN THERE FOR THIS VIDEO SHOOT

Monday, November 9th, 2009 at 4:30pm by

Dear Oceano: congratulations! You are now only the second worst group to add a vowel to the end of the word “ocean” and use that as your band name.

This video by the band Oceana (yes, Oceana) is only interesting for about three seconds. I suggest you skip to the ten second mark, and then turn the video off around the thirteen second mark. Because what really fascinates me about this video is the following quesiton: How many takes do you think they had to do of everyone starting to headbang all at once like that? I bet somewhere there are at least a half dozen takes where one of the band members starts too soon or too late. In fact, I think it’s fascinating that the singer is the only member of the band who doesn’t partake in the synchronized rockin’ out… or any rockin’ out during the rest of the video. It’s as though he were too stupid to take even the slightest direction, so whomever was in charge decided “Let’s not have him move at all and people will think it’s part of the ‘meaning’ of the video!”




I hope this is just the latest in a trend of bands using a completely fake and meaningless variation on the word “ocean” – we can have Oceani, Oceanu, Oceany,and a few dozen other bands that were too lazy to use an actual word as their band name.

-AR

Thanks to Samuel A. Favata for the tip.

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  • msv81

    Nice mullet, idiot.

    • Alex P.

      Stole the words from my mouth.

      The worst is that I saw this guy at my school with the exact same mullet… and a hot girlfriend! Apparantly, having hideously ugly hair makes you a real man now days. Just like the ’80′s!

      • billy

        was his girlfriend the drummer?

        • Josh

          ZING!

  • Jimmy

    Oceana >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Oceano

    • Jugglemonkey

      +1

      not my cup of tea, but it could be a lot worse.

  • John

    Dont forget the band “The Ocean”

    • RockOutWithMy…YouKnow

      But The Ocean rules, so they don’t belong here.

      • Lybrium

        I second that, strongly.

  • this band sucks

    WOW what a mullet, for a douchebag……… Oceano SUCKS Oceana Sucks infact the OCEAN itself SUCKS..
    But check out my new band Oceany myspace.com/retard

    • Lybrium

      ur band sucks! ;)

  • I’m not racist, but I hate Oceano

    I really really hope that mullet takes over swoop hair. I would pay so much money to watch a bunch of 15 year olds running around the mall with mullets.

    Also, the lead singer is mysterious and too sensitive to headband Axl, you moron.

    • alliaphagist

      hah this is what I was going to post.

      OK, not the second bit.

  • http://www.theblacklaser.net Joe The Wizard

    Did I miss something? When did androgyny become cool again?

    • Alex P.

      In the nineties, with the birth of shitty Emo.

      And yes, I know Emo is older, but Rites of Spring kick ass, and aren’t really all that androgynous.

  • dude

    my friend from florida grew up with these kids…he doesn’t like them very much at all

  • http://www.gravatar.com/avatar/62449cbe5ea8d22bcc2e76890fceaa37.png Lord Bling

    All these ‘Ocean-randomvowel’ bands are nothing when compared to the great Isis album, ‘Oceanic’.

    • Lybrium

      agreed, personally though; I think Panopticon is their best.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Toni-Tapia/575992740 Toni Tapia

    oceano actually took their name from the spanish translation of ocean.. that’s what i like to think, if not thats just downright stupid.. and i happen to think that oceana (as stupid as the band name may be) are a pretty good band.. :D

  • canea

    That was touching.

  • ColinJ

    “Because oceans are all, like, deep and dark and stuff. Just like us…”

    Spare me.

  • Sammy

    Well, there goes my idea for Oceaniwrestledabearonce. And having a fat, barefoot, cankled bassist.

  • Killer Kovarik

    and i paused listening to King Diamond for this horse shit?

    • Michiel

      Same here, haha.

      I AM ALIVE INSIDE YOUR WIFE

      • http://www.metalophemia.com AMP

        Hahaha

  • Benito

    is the drummer a girl?

    Im super serial.

  • key

    that is one ugly motherfucker singing. his/her/its gender isn’t ambiguous at all, either.

  • TheRooktrocity

    This sucks.

  • writenamehere

    the sound was kinda okay to me, but the fucking head bang is comedy.haha

  • Tim-o-tato

    Nothing but a bunch of fucking haters on here lol
    All these bands are just doing there thing. Who are we to judge?
    IMO, Oceano rules, Oceana rulez, and Isis’s Oceanic rulezzz lol
    BUT, the best of all oceans is Gojira’s “Ocean Planet”!!!!
    hahaha

    • Lybrium

      Dude, i don’t how much respect this music deserves, the arrangement is bland, production is slick but unimaginative, this is music meant to be sold, not loved. BUT! fuck yea Ocean Planet is the shit, and since you didn’t mention them in you’re little blurb, check out the band “The Ocean Collective” (usually just “The Ocean)

    • http://reaper-x.deviantart.com/ Reaper-X

      We’re listeners, of course we’re going to judge.

      Who are you to tell us not to judge?

  • mrbinky

    Ugh, these guys suck.

  • orbital

    i’m having dejavu. Didn’t we alrady LOL at these fgts?

  • pigchop
  • http://www.myspace.com/somethinglikesweet CJ

    Well, the video blows, but I don’t actually hate the song. Could be good for more mellow day if I wanted to have one.

  • (required)

    Laziness = Making up words? Whatever the fuck you say, man. Guess James Joyce was a fucking sloth.

  • I

    Decent song. Not great, but it didn’t make me want to throw-up. I could see it being used in a movie, or movie trailer, or something like that. But the video was horrible. The director needs to be drawn and quartered. And a fucking mullet?!! Are you fucking kidding me? Only white trash can pull that off, not emowannabees. And I fucking hate white trash.

  • Sambo

    Glad you guys enjoyed the video! :)

    Oh btw, this is the guy who sent that video in lmfao!

    • http://lordsofmetal.nl/index.php?lang=en FleischBerg

      Thank you for ruining my day asshole >:(!

      • Sambo

        You’re welcome and it was an honor! :D

  • http://www.metalophemia.com AMP

    If you play this backwards it says, “We fucking reek”.

    They’re doing their thing, but there is nothing original here…from their name, to their choreographed moves and music.

  • Ben

    Oceana’s been around longer than Oceano I am pretty sure. And they’re also way better than oceano. But yes, The Ocean > all other ocean bands.

    • Lybrium

      hellyeah.

  • SHOCKTROOP

    HAHA. the bass player is such a fat slob. he looks like some dude they just recruited out of some stripclub in Alabama somewhere. and I can’t tell is the singer is a guy or a chick.

  • Jizzmaster3000

    Anyone else find the sound of this really dated?

    Also what’s the gender of the drummer? Yes that’s a serious question.

    • Alex P.

      Yeah, this is nu-metal without the rap. And the drummer is a chick… I think.

  • Alex P.

    And another thing. What the fuck? Why is there a nu-metal revival movement? Nu-metal, as a fucking movement, produced two good bands total (System of a Down and In Flames), and one of those bands was better before they entered the movement!

    I guess it’s like Vains of Jenna. No matter how worthless your genre, there’s always someone out there who idolizes it enough that they will copy it years down the road. Better start getting ready for Attack Attack!’s reunion tour!

    • Jizzmaster3000

      In Flames Nu-Metal? Was that a joke?

      • http://lordsofmetal.nl/index.php?lang=en Cavorka

        No, but Reroute To Remain was…

  • Master Shake

    This isnt really nu metal, more along the lines of metalcore. Deftones for me would easily be the best band to have come out of the whole nu metal thing, and unlike most bands involved, they are still making good music.

  • Octillus

    Technically Ocean Machine was a band. Kinda nullifies any other contenders for best ocean band.

    Just sayin’

  • jdub

    I once swam in an ocean.

  • Martin

    What the fuck is the drummer doing around :54? Seriously, what in the fuck is that?

  • http://lordsofmetal.nl/index.php?lang=en Cavorka

    Asshat banging head against drum around the 0.54 – 0.56 mark….

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jason-Crispen/100000169530540 Jason Crispen

    these guys broke up for a bit, but now they’re back. a few months back a tour came through toledo and the promoter had OCEANO on the flyer instead of these guys. it was a decidely un-metal tour. i don’t have to tell you the hijinks that ensued! haha

  • AMerican Hate

    so emo kids like mullets now? wtf someone should buy this whiny dirtbag a fucking haircut

  • Facebook User

    what surprising is even this song is really emo, its not like anything ive heard before. he doesnt even sing like a traditional emo kid

    kudos. im sure these dudes will get far enough

  • wata

    The lack of crabbing is disturbing.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dustin-McClain/1018426738 Dustin McClain

    ALL of you are fucking idiots. This band is soooo fucking brutal it’s not funny. I would love too see any of yall either A; play drums that fucking good, B; play guitar that good C: scream that good D; be at one of there shows. I would love even more for anyone of you to go to one of there shows and say that these guys suck. HA, you would make it past “These guys Su-” before having a limb torn from your body. This is a stupid website, grow the fuck up. All of you are just hating on a great thing. Why don’t yall start a Lil Wayne sucks website.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dustin-McClain/1018426738 Dustin McClain

    BTW, that video has nothing at all to do with Oceano. You need to put a real video up. Ass whipes.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dustin-McClain/1018426738 Dustin McClain