ALBACORE… HARDY HAR HAR
Monday, November 30th, 2009 at 1:00pm by Axl Rosenberg
An anonymous reader tipped us off to the existence of Georgia’s Amecca, a band whose MySpace bio makes the following claim:
Further on the newly developed genre of Albacore, we created the genre as a dedication to some of the most premium food on the planet, Seafood. We also used the creation of a new genre to display the fact that we are different from every other market band. With fast paced death metal riffs and heavy breakdowns merging styles of bands such as Whitechapel and Oceano as well as The Faceless and Veil of Maya. We step away from the popular “Deathcore” scene by titling our songs after seafood platters and bringing awareness to the dying breeds of the Sea.
Now, I think this is worth talking about for the following reason: while it’s clear that these dudes have a sense of humor, they do not have a sense of humor the way I think they should. Allow me to clarify:
- Creating “Albacore” as a dedication to seafood ignores the already popular crabcore genre. Unless these guys don’t count crabs as seafood, in which case they’re retarded.
- The creation of a new genre tag is not, as the band claims, “the creation of a new genre.” Nor does titling their songs after seafood platters really make them “step away from the popular ‘deathcore’ scene.” In fact, this band just plays terrible, third-rate deathcore that is in no way comparable to The Faceless or Veil of Maya. Hell, I don’t like Whitechapel or Oceano, but I’ll go on record right now as saying that both of those bands are better than Amecca.
- They seem to be unaware of the existence of Jessica Alba’s Gorgeous Ass, the world’s true (and tr00) first Albacore band.
In conclusion: young bands need to take note that a not especially clever gimmick is not going to separate you from the pack. At least Slipknot were motivated enough to make costumes, fellas. All you get is one shitty post on one overrated website, and then poof!, no one remembers who you are.
-AR
1. Creating “Albacore” as a dedication to seafood ignores the already popular crabcore genre. Unless these guys don’t count crabs as seafood, in which case they’re retarded.
I think that’s the joke. They know about crabcore, but are making fun of how every band tries to make themselves sound unique.
It’s just a pun, don’t give them too much credit.
I prefer bury your dead’s dedication to tom cruise.
+1
If you check out their “live” photos, you can clearly see that these boys KNOW
about ‘crabcore’ lol
God help us all…
Shit sandwich core:
Shit sandwich of Maya
Shit sandwich chapel
Despised Shit sandwich
Suicide Shit sandwich
Wnds of shit sandwich
After the shit shandwich
Beneath the shitsandwich
Bury your shit sandwich
Arsonists get all the shit sandwiches
The devil wears shit sandwiches
and finally…
Shit sandwich
How about the ever awesome Iwrestledshitsandwichesonce?
Or better yet, Job for a Shit Sandwich.
fucking LOL
Saw Job For A Cowboy on Tuesday night in SF and they fucking ruled.
Way better than the headliner, GWshitsandwhichAR.
lol poser
they play here tonight, would only go for The Red Chord, but I fucking can’t!!
This kind of things should make you wonder if you want to have children one day… I mean, do you really want your children to see this crap?? This world is dead, it’s over, just let it go…
On the other hand, Dark Tranquillity announcing their new album give me some hope…
Do you want your children to start a fucking band like this? I’m making my kid play marimba and leave it at that.
Deathcore bands should be shot on sight, all of them.
The Red Chord is a huge exception
I think The Red Chord is grindcore, bud.
TRC is definitely NOT grindcore. Just because they have blast beats doesn’t make them grind.
They’re mixed in with the rest of generic death metal really.
Not like it’s a bad thing
these guys definitely have a great sense of humor. they think Oceano is something to model yourself after.
Guttermouth also did the “albacore” joke like 5 years ago.
thank you, was hoping someone would point that the fuck out
Right on dude. The reason i clicked on this post was to say that, but you beat me to it.
Same here
Basically, Amecca + attempt at humor = Fail.
What would have been funny would be watching them crack themselves up when they thought of all this.
+100 for Alba’s Ass!!!
She had a baby so that might of affected her nice ass.
Biel > Alba.
god, i…..i want to beat the crap out of these idiots….they represent everything that is wrong with 21st century life…..must…retrain myself…..commence putting…on….opeth record……ahhhhh.much better.
Opeth is always a good life solution xD I wonder if the name Mikael Akerfeldt even means anything to Amecca. Doubt it.
they problly hear that name and assume hes a swedish funiture designer or sometihn.
> 2.The creation of a new genre tag is not, as the band claims, “the creation of a new genre.”
I think I smell a pair of hypocrites here. Didn’t you do just that with “crabcore” and “Sumeriancore”? I mean, you ramble on about both of these at least once a week.
Axl is just upset that Amecca won’t recognize his own genre labeling, haha.
Well, that and Wikipedia not recognising the genres as genuine and therefore kicking them off the site, yeah.
It must be a hard life, being the creators of a jokey tag applicable to one band because of one single music video, and another tag which is essentially another word for shitty deathcore with some keyboards and synths in it.
Now the dying breeds will die for once per all.
knocking this band for their sense of humor, but loving iwrestledafatjewonce?
hahaha
The guy on the far right in the photo – is his neck twice the width of his head?
WHAT THE FUCK HUGE NECK
Damn!!! that guy can be fuck-throated very easily.. not that I want to,. just saying
The Faceless are deathcore?
If you notice, the ending lyrics to the first song is “We cook the shrimp like OH”
and they repeat.
Definitely better than Oceano. You can’t really be worse. At least these guys have instruments they play.
can play*
why metalsucks hates these guys but like oceano, faceless, etcetc escapes me. i mean, when theres a fat guy goin sleevless, a v neck shirt, gadges, white trash beater w cap, skinny jeans, and at least two memebers could be on Dawsons creek, youve got youself a SHITTY BAND. not to mention the music. once again, i revert back to my opeth, and the world is at peace.
You sir, are a fucking moron and should take a class in sarcasm. You should read that review once more and look for sarcasm.
Judging a band by appearance on double checking your post. Win Neil, win.
so whatever happened to An Albatross?
Apparently none of you dumbass people know anything about music. Their individual skills are much greater than half of the other bands out there trying to make it. I think that their about me gives them a sense of personality, and the fact that they are going out on a limb to create their own style of music. Which I must say their music has been greatly appreciated by many in the south. This is a group of well-talented musicians and until you can produce something better than none of you should even be judging them whatsoever. They are much better than you give them credit for and I want to think you for giving them publicity. Good or bad, they’re getting more advertising thanks to you fucking idiots.
I’ve made something better. Twice. (3 if you want to count EP’s.) So, seeing as I’ve now been given my free pass to judge, I’ll make my judgement:
Shit sandwich.
What is it with dumb bitches like you and this whole “You’re just giving them free promotion” shit?
It’s like the new “I know you are but what am I?”…seriously. Your argument is null and void.
To the first guy: Whats your bands name? You failed to include that in your comment and you’re most likely just talking shit.
second guy: You are a fucking idiot. Any publicity in the entertainment business whether it is good or bad actually helps, it gets your name out there. Because of this post Ameccas plays and friend requests on myspace have gone up noticeably. I would say that’s a good thing. We are a curious species and if we are informed about something, we will most likely go find out the truth for ourselves.
and for another thing, Jessica alba’s gorgeous ass isn’t even a band anymore, so that is completely irrelevant. You have no way of following up that they are a shitty band, which they aren’t. You gave nothing to support your theories other than a band that doesn’t even exist anymore and that if you haven’t heard of them you have to go by your judgement. Which makes you a pretty shitty person since you have nothing better to do with your life than make fun of bands. Next time try choosing a band that might possibly actually suck. Thanks again, dumbass.
You guys obviously don’t understand that this band plays music because it’s what they want to play. Who cares what your opinion on it is…it’s not like you’re forced to listen to it. They have fun playing music without taking themselves too seriously..so why speak condescendingly about them? Personally I think the whole albacore thing is mocking the whole “core” thing going on in music today..but you guys are taking it way too seriously. They are EXTREMELY talented musicians and as far as I’m concerned that’s all that matters. If you don’t like them, don’t listen to them. Another gerogia band Attila plays what they call “partycore”…which basically pertains to fucking bitches and smoking blunts, so I’m sure you guys have a problem with that also. A lot of bands make music for themselves…and not for you…so get over it and keep listening to your opeth.
Blunts suck, and I will contiinue listening to Opeth. That is all.
Attila is the most joke shit band ever.
They’ve already been torn apart on this site in the past.
I call bullshit all over the last two posts.
The band’s drummer is bored.
Did they buy thier clothes at Baby Gap?
Ringworm needs to release a new album quickly so that I never listen to the atrocities anymore.
Guttermouth beat them to ‘albacore’ by a good 12 years. See: Musical Monkey – Baker’s Dozen
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0pQS5ZNsVk
Skacore!
“a not especially clever gimmick is not going to separate you from the pack”, but it WILL get you an entire posting dedicated to your band on Metalsucks.
What that old saying about press?!
“Bad publicity is better than no publicity” or something like that. I dunno, I always imagine Gene Simmons saying it for whatever reason.
I do s’pose it certainly holds merit.
Who cried to their girlfriends and told them to post meaningful sentiments on the message board? Christ, grow a pair and put down the can of crylon already.
Actually, dumb ass bitch. None of Ameccas girlfriends have posted on this site.
Oh, sorry, my mistake. I guess I assumed that you would actually have girlfriends. Sorry. Well, I apologize for interrupting your fapping to the Lita Ford photos from another post rather than either getting laid or writing good music. carry on.
Again, you’re a dumbass bitch.
they have girlfriends, and they write good music.
I’m not AMECCA, My names Krysten. So your entire rouse to be sarcastic failed.
If you actually care to know who you’re talking to, talk to me on myspace.
myspace.com/krystenfidelity
just know, I don’t talk shit, I will back my shit up.
Stupid cunt.
Awwww did someone’s feewings get hurt? So sad, too bad.
To think for a second that I actually care about this enough to know who I am conversing with on a music blog, let alone you as a person, is a laugh. Obviously your poor grammar and affinity for vulgarities shows your immaturity. I have better things to do with my time than to continue this ridiculous tirade, nor will I “chat you up” on myspace little girl. I have no time in my life for you, so go whine to someone who cares.
Darling, I’m most likely older than you are. I’m not whining, I’m standing my ground.
You’re the one who is running.
Bye bye.
Too bad Jessica Alba’s Gorgeous Ass is Albacore dedicated to Jessica Alba and not the tuna.
Good work being retarded AR.
Another thing, crabcore isn’t a dedication to seafood, it’s just kids putting their sacks on the stage.
Gilbert,
I think you should change your handle to “Arnie Grape” – the mentally handicapped character played by Leonardo DiCaprio.
Actually, that’s not right, either. Even that idiot would have gotten the “Albacore” pun and the fact that I’m aware that crabcore isn’t about seafood.
In conclusion, please study the definition of this word:
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/joke
-AR
Well played sir.