YEAH, VARG. WE’RE THE RACIST ONES. THAT’S RICH.
Varg Vikernes, the last time he really enjoyed pussy.
A couple of weeks ago, Varg Vikernes celebrated his own personal Shawshank Redemption by announcing a new Burzum album, entitled Den Hvite Guden, which translates to The White God. Now Metal Underground tells me that he’s changed the album’s title to Belus, which translates to… The White God. After the jump, read Varg’s statement, with my own comments in bold.
“When I used the name ‘The White God’ for my next album I had no idea it would stir up so much fear and irrational emotions. I don’t think it stirred up any fear. I’d also argue that your bigoted rhetoric is irrational, not people like us coming along and pointing out that we’re all pink on the inside, as the saying goes. To me this is just a nickname of Baldur, whom the album is all about. No ambiguity intended. The truth is I announced the release of The White God at this early point to ease the pressure on the www.burzum.org host. You’re a peach. He was getting tired of having to tell individuals contacting him that he didn’t know when the next album would be due, what its name was going to be or anything else. So maybe he shouldn’t be the host. What do you think? Might serve you better to hire a dude who can handle those sorts of questions, right? With the article this problem was solved.
“With a title including the word ‘white’ it apparently isn’t possible to slip under the radar of the racist Western media. Accusing other black metallers of behaving too much like “the stereotypical Negro” and taking them to task because they “dress, walk, talk, look and act like homosexuals” isn’t bigoted, but the “Western media” is? Also, where the fuck do you think you live, dick? Norway ain’t exactly the Far East, y’know? To take away their excuse to spread their anti-Varg/anti-Burzum hate-propaganda when (and before) the album is released I have decided to change the album title. A) I think that makes you a chicken-shit, and b) statements like this one will ensure that people like me always have an excuse to spread anti-Varge “hate propaganda.” By the way, you apparently have a PhD in hate propaganda, so… These self-loathing fools If by “self-loathing” you mean “Varg-loathing,” then fine. But I actually love myself. Often several times a day. have no interest in the music anyway Because it sounds like it was recorded in a bum’s asshole, and because of that I don’t want their attention So why the fucking fuck did you release this statement? You’re the biggest attention whore this side of Andy Dick – and I won’t get it if I use a title that doesn’t give them an excuse to attack me. We don’t need an excuse. You’re a prick, and clearly, given enough rope, you’ll hang yourself anyway.
“The new title of the album is, as you might have guessed from the title of this article, Belus, the so-called Indo-European name for Baldur/the White God. So you really didn’t change your album’s title at all. So either this whole statement is a farce, or you’re even stupider than we thought. Either way, please strongly consider offing yourself. I could have used any European name for this deity, but I chose this one because it is the oldest known name and because it is pan-European. How United Colors of Bennetton of you.
Look: the phrase “the white god” might actually not be offensive in and of itself; the presence alone of the word “white” isn’t what made people angry, and it’s fucktarded of Vikernes to assume that the use of that one word is where the problem lay. But when you announce that your album is going to be called The White God in the same statement where you make racist and homophobic comments… well… it’s all about context, dude. Of course everyone assumes you mean “white” to be synonymous with “caucasian” following ignorant statements about black people and gays.
But if what you really want is for people like me to stop writing negative things about you, just shut your fucking trap. Of course, you won’t shut your fucking trap, because you don’t want us to stop talking smack – you love the spotlight too much.
In conclusion: I’d tell you to suck my dick, Varg, but I think you’d enjoy that too much.
-AR
