FUNNY PHOTO CAPTION CONTEST: WIN MUSIC SKINS SIGNED BY COHEED & CAMBRIA!
Thursday, December 10th, 2009 at 5:00pm by Vince Neilstein
The two winners of last week’s funny photo caption contest each win a hand-dandy CD of Nirvana 2002’s ‘89-’91 Recordings provided by Relapse Records. The winning entries are:
- Chet Stedman: “The only known photo to surface from the Rick Ross/Chris Barnes collabo entitled “The Blinging”"
- meat mincing machine: “Yo dawg, pass me some of that blunt force castration.”
This week we’ve got something different for you. The folks at Music Skins have provided us with custom decals for Guitar Hero and Rock Band guitars, each with Coheed & Cambria printed branding and actual signatures of every band member. We’ve got 3 models; 2 of them are for the Rock Band Guitar (Stratocaster) and one is for the Guitar Hero guitar for Wii (Les Paul model). Even if you don’t have a practical use for these decals you should still enter the contest, because they’re pretty fucking cool as a piece of rock memorabilia on their own.
Just come up with a funny caption to the photo below (sent in by Nikkü), and remember to use a real email address (not a Facebook Connect login).
Do you see now what happens when you ditch your baby in a dumpster?
You’re kidding right? You’re not actually giving away fucking Guitar Hero decals, are you?
Lame.
Yeah. I don’t even want to enter this because:
A. It’s Coheed and Cambria, who I don’t like
B. It’s Guitar Hero, which I suck at, don’t like, and don’t play.
Sell it on Ebay.
Or you don’t want to enter because you’re not humorous, clever, or worthwhile.
“Wahhhh the stuff you guys generously give out for free I don’t like, wahhh!”
Nice use of Artie!
Yeah Mike2, why don’t you go tell your Mom her vagina was too tight on the way through, it’s practically the same thing. Seriously, go to her and tell her you believe the damage caused by her overly-taught snizz is what makes you such a fuck-wit. Then tell her I’ll see her tomorrow night as usual. Good boy.
Douche. Total Douche.
“oscar your a grouch”
“Bitch! i live in a fucking trash can”
haha dave chapelle ^^
Shit, I had something really hilarious to say until I saw the prize…
“Weird Al” does research for his upcoming Brian Posehn parody entitled “Metal In Dumpsters”.
Writing process behind Slayer’s albums revealed.
Win.
Fucking win.
No contest.
Hilarious!!!!!!!!!!! :D
Damn you, I was just about to write the exact same thing :|
You’d better win.
This picture is fucking EPIC!!!
wIN!!
When Chad Kroeger’s mom asked him to take out the trash, he had no other choice than to throw himself in the dumpster.
I’ve been wondering how those Facebook guys manage to collect their prizes.
Don’t forget to use the “H” when you say your starting a thrash metal band.
I don’t know if this is going to win, but it is a decent effort. Great job.
WIN !!
I like it!
Lester’s bandmates finally got tired of his recycled riffs.
Like this one, a lot.
Here Paul tries to make the most out of being stuffed in the garbage by the jocks. You go Paul; nobody can take that away from you.
White Trash , Yellow Can
That’s actually an awesome picture.
the before picture of a dude about to get blasted in the face with guitar hero pickguards covered with autographed stickers from coheed and cambria.
Here you see the elusive Ziltoid slinking back into his recesses after schooling some scene kid in what is troo.
Now that I’m reading this again, it’s awful. This makes me sounds like I think Ziltoid makes good points. What an asshole I am!!
Somewhere out there is a pair of legs roaming around with a red lid on top. Another successful experiment performed in the laboratory of stoner inventors.
Why can’t you give away a Guitar Hero guitar? That would be awesome.
What the fuck is vidro?
Glass
When going green turns black.
WIN LMFAO
Hahaha that’s pretty clever.
“My friend Vidro would be great for this picture. He could get in the red can!”
this was actually the inspiration for the song where the slime live
municipal waste
Ok wtf, I swear I didn’t see that before I typed mine in. douchecanoe.
This is actually the cover of the next Municipal Waste album appropriately entitled ‘Kill Your Parents, Recycle Your Plastics’.
i lol’d
I laughed, and clapped. Good show sir.
it’s ok, neither of us wrote anything very witty
i beg to differ, you simply named a band while I used my brain – big difference.
pwnt
Look, mixing the plastic and paper recyclables is not going to make Gojira write another album similar to “From Mars to Sirius”.
Axl trying to get Joe Duplantier’s attention
He’s dead, in a trash can, and rats have been nibbling on his flesh.
He’s a CAN-NIBBLE CORPSE!
I’m sorry.
You should win for the apology. That made me laugh.
I don’t know why but I can’t stop laughing. The apology was hilarious.
Abuse and Reuse. Dont you want to hear the same shit 10 years from now?
far before Dimbag made “Reinventing the steel” with pantera, he had a solo project, “Recycling the steel”
…dude, Vidro slays.
Everybody who bought it should have done this to Chinese Democracy!
That must be where Adam D. finds those recycled riffs.
You make a Great observation with that
Where Kanye West gets ALL his “original” music from.
The bastard child of Kirk Hammett and Joe Duplantier.
Not as bad as the trash you find in the red “Juggalo” bin
Metalheads don’t die; they recycle themselves.
He can fit inside your rectum too!
In his quest for the perfect Soundgarden parody, Weird Al searches the depths of Chris Cornell’s career only to emerge drawing flies.
Trashed, Tossed, and Flung Out
The average Coheed and Cambria fan gives up on trying to get people to like his favorite band and goes where most metalheads tell him to go when he mentions them
Quick! To the HazMat Cave!
The resurrected Jesús emerges from his tomb on the dawn of the first metal Easter.
True metal heads aren’t born….
I don’t have a caption, which sucks because I really, really want the prize. Coheed is my favorite band of all time after Metallica and Rush. :(
Municipal Waste….what’s that? People already wrote that? Damn…alright, alright ummmmmmmmm……E. Town Concrete? I give up!
The birth of Bay Area Trash Metal!
What a fucking moronic statement.
Metal Municipal Waste can be recycled
“Who sent out the memo that said yellow wasnt metal?”
Even at a young age, Paul Waggoner was interested in protecting the environment.
this
Junkcore
This must be why we get the same sounding stuff coming out all the time. This is also where Metallica must put their ideas.
Dana Carvey wants to know:
“Is he not ‘metally’ enough for the ‘Thrash Can’ Club?”
Environment starts to improve!
You’re not trashing all around!
Acting responsibly…
WHY TRASH?!
He’ll get recycled into a hipster if he doesn’t get out fast.
This event does actually happen folks, IWABO is living proof that if you leave a metalhead out to be reprocessed, he’ll become an abomination.
And if the camera could have panned over just a little to the left, you could have seen two MetalSucks commenters arguing about whether they should be in the Post-Hardcore Melodic Viking bin, or the Melodic Sumerian-deathcore bin.
In an attempt to impress Vince, Axl Rosenberg tries his best to show his friend how ‘metal’ he really is.
Simply a form of rebelling against a dead beat mom who’s too fat and lazy to leave the sofa and vibrator behind, “If that dumb bitch wont drive me to see Gojira live, I’ll be delivered straight to Toxic Garbage Island myself!”
Recycling: Not just for Hippies.
And this is the story of how crab core began
The “Core” recycling system was seemed to be working well, Death-core in the red bins, Metal-core in the yellow, and in anticipation of the next craze the Vidro-core bins were lined and ready. Unfortunately, Unearth and All That Remains started fucking in the bottom of the yellow bin. Ladies and gentlemen I give you the bane of our existence in 2010…… Unearth The Remains.
haha vidro-core…
After contracting AIDS from a used needle at the bottom of the bin, Barry decided to start listening to Jazz.
Suicide Silence really, REALLY wanted to be known as a Metal band.
TRUE TRASH METAL!!!!
Roadrunner Records in 2011
winner!
“Seriously dudes, I can’t get out of this thing.”
And this folks is how Metalcore is made.
Ah, so there’s where Metallica’s been living since the Black album.
put your 50 cents in the vidro 3000 and out the other side comes a fully equipped metal nerd
That kid actually wants this prize.
How to fire your singer and still be eco-friendly.
Cover for Weird Al’s new album “Dare to be Metal”
PS I dont want the prize (Not that i think i will win)
He’s hiding from the shitty Coheed and Cambria set.
Dooood…. look at this sweet bracelet I found in the garbage, quick get your phone out !
Quality.
How editors and writters come about their end-of-decade lists ideas
I think this just speaks for itself.
You vant to play like Garbage? Be the Garbage.
This is the accumulation of recycled breakdowns and riffs over the past years.
2012: The last metalhead dies in captivity, is recycled
Al Gore has really come a long way.
E-Mail: Codyfoss@live.com
And Oscar finally moves away from Sesame street…
Where screamo started from death metal started from thrash metal started from acid metal started from psychedelic rock started from…
This picture is too epic for a caption.
Where John Schaffer finds his inspiration.
How to make Metal: Add hair, war bracelet, the horns, a sexually repressed nerd, and recycle ad infinitum.
“The factory stopped making headbangers in 1986, but thanks to Metal Conservation and Reclamation efforts, we still have most of them with us today”
Circa 1978 photo of Judas Priest member looking for inspiration for a new album, which became titled British Steel shortly after this scene.
Ziltoid’s last defense against false metal.
look its metal’s version of oscar the grouch
During his time in prison, Varg Vikernes did a very short stint in solitary confinement after the guards realized he enjoyed it too much.
Death Magnetic
new attack attack singer thinks this makes him more metal
Applecore
Rise of a New Genre.
Green Metal.
Metal Injection’s Thrash it or Trash it makes one musician take it too seriously.
“It shall take 3 pence to climb thy stairs!” said mortiis the stair troll.
Draonforce’s ZP Theart after the bank foreclosed on his house.
I see he is looking for that damn Gold Cobra.
No bro, thats NOT what MIOBRO 4000 means…
What Jon Schaffer’s riffs look like before they’re recycled…
Ha! Trash metal.
“I’ve searched this entire bin…..Kerry didn’t use a single thing in here for World Painted Blood! However, the Br00tal Deathcore Scoops Bin is bone dry.”
Alas, Axl’s dignity wasn’t at the bottom of the bin.
Strategically using the devil horns to cover the logo on his Alter Bridge t-shirt, Gavin felt confident he’d finally taken the ultimate Myspace profile pic….. Getting out of the bin was proving to be a little bit more of a challenge.
The Metal Bin was getting a little bit tired of this shit.
Now that’s a real shame when folks be throwin’ away a perfectly good white boy like that.
Iv never seen better off dead ever
An Inconvenient Douche.
The true origin of Thrash Metal was born from Trash Metal.
“You should’nt recycle metal. I threw out a motograter CD and got back Five Finger Death Punch.”
The metalcore scene (post Botch) summed up in a nutshell!
Metal Blade Records hired an intern to search for more generic deathcore/metalcore bands to sign. Luckily, he knew exactly where to search.
Claudio Sanchez finally realized he’s fucking garbage.
boo!
Fuck global warming. Please dont recycle
“This is what happens when Sesame Street gets signed to Roadrunner Records. Presenting your new Oscar the Grouch.”
MetalSucks: The Picture
get it? because you guys are fucking trash
Weird Al’s metal album was complete garbage
recycle old metal to make nu metal!
When you recycle grungy thrash kids, you save 5% of the ozone layer
The Thrash Bin
o god, now they have recyclecore, what else will they think of?
Even Weird Al has decided to jump on the metal bandwagon.
You’ve heard of Black Metal? Now there’s Yellow Metal: brutal, yet cheerful.
“Brokencyde’s version of metal…trash!’
Little did we know that Oscar from Sesame Street used to be a massive Burzum fan
The new “white trash” cover art has been released
Algorecore
Mainstream Metal: The same recycled garbage, over and over. Now with “vintage retro” spiked bracelets.
So that is where Ronnie James Dio’s unwanted love child went!
This is how I got in backstage at the recycle a whore festival in 09.
This is where Slipknot fans ages 15+ go.
TRASH METAL RULES!
Kirk Hammet and all of the recycled riffs that will end up on the next Metallica album.
Thrash Metal…getting recycled since 1983.
the great evolution of metal all the riffs and sounds are recycled and used for the next great sound in metal
Recycled Metal. That’s right, the new wave of Thrash isn’t original.
I’ve never seen so many trashy recycled captions before.
Desperate for a song that would make him rich in Hot Topic money, Jasper knew there was only one place to go: the metal recycling bin, where all In Flames/Pantera/Meshuggah riffs go to die.
“Kill Switch Engage has entered the pre-writing stages for their next album”
New metal bands lack originality nowadays; they only recycle each other’s trash.
Demi Levato: Before the makeover
the first ever pictures of Dio’s fountain of youth
Oscar the Kvltch
A rare picture from Weird Al’s early metal years.
Recycling: the new alternative to hardcore dancing.
“and here we see Dez Fafara looking for lyrics and guitar riffs in the recycled metal bin”
“A little something got lost along the way when Unearth fans decided ‘Recycling Anatomy’ was not just a song, but a suggestion.”
Anything post 1984
Trying to improve their image, Victory Records offer luxury hotel suites to their bands on tour
The file “Metal-core” is too big for the Recycle Bin. Do you wish to delete it permanently?
This was taken about 10 minutes after last weeks funny photo. Turns out that the first inaugural Compton Metal Fest was also going to be the last.
Fearful his new project would be labeled as some kind of “core” band, Gavin decided to pigeonhole himself.
After seeing this photo, The Metal Bin decided to do something about his head lice.
My apologies if some of these are lame, I just really want this prize.
Trash Metal!
After recently breaking his programming and discovering Metal, Dalek 279 changed his name to Dalek 666.
“Thrash Can”.
Forgive me if someone already said this.
Welcome To Trashcore , Grouch!!!!
Trash metal
Metal isn’t garbage, it’s recyclable.
oh wait, that’s not metal..
stephen o malley emerges from yet another sunn recording session…
Luis Smells, Refuse Lyin’
If it’s not metal…it’s SCRAP!
After Dino found a new singer for Divine Heresy, the recycled FF riffs were in the very next bin.
Jocks are getting lazy.
“Recycle metal, because creating something new just isn’t that cool.”
Dave Mustaine and Zakk Wylde were just glad to have a bit of company, it got awfully lonely in there sometimes.
Five Finger Death Punch find their missing band mate.
His mum was going to kill him when she saw the stains, but for the first time in his life Gavin actually felt cool.
While slightly less attractive than her predecessors, the most recent Winds Of Plague Keyboardist/ Token Vagina to be sacked by the band remained optimistic.
“The typical result of a Christian up-bringing.”
The not-so-sharps container
The new ‘cross-over’ movement: Sesame Street meets Trash Metal.
Grug goes to Hellfest
Taking the lyrics to Devin Townsend’s “Earth Day” a little too seriously.
Look what happens when you recycle metal.
Every poser that dies ends up in a trashcan for eternity. Not sure what the fuck video is though.
Vidro. Fuckin foreign shit.
Dee Snider still trying to prove he’s metal.
Emmure attempts to recycle fans of real metal into flat bill-wearing, siq gauge-sporting Frankie fans.
Toxic Garbage Island Hotel’s rooms weren’t the biggest, but they suited the basic needs of the traveling Metal head.
I have a couple:
“The actual origins of Attack Attack!”
and
“And that’s where the emo babies come from…for machines!”
John threw the horns and thanked the metal gods
for those ignorant fools getting it right this time and
not throwing him in the ‘emo’ bin
Donated and resold at a Hot Topic near you
Contrary to popular believe nu-metal is not recyclable….
I once heard it takes one retard in a dumpster to make the same music Slipknot does..
I guess this is that retard.
I think it’s actually two retards. One to sit in it and one to hit it with a baseball bat.
Fuck the Whales, save Metal!
Matt Heafy takes us back to where it all began.
Chad Kroeger sent his guitar tech searching for ideas. Unfortunately, the METAL bin was empty, and the PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR ROCK bin was nowhere to be found.
One man’s metal is another man’s tre…well this is still garbage.
Also, this is the actual recording studio for all Victory Records artists asides from BTBAM.