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Contests

FUNNY PHOTO CAPTION CONTEST: WIN MUSIC SKINS SIGNED BY COHEED & CAMBRIA!

 Thursday, December 10th, 2009 at 5:00pm by

cannibal corpse penthouseThe two winners of last week’s funny photo caption contest each win a hand-dandy CD of Nirvana 2002′s ’89-’91 Recordings provided by Relapse Records. The winning entries are:

  • Chet Stedman: “The only known photo to surface from the Rick Ross/Chris Barnes collabo entitled “The Blinging”"
  • meat mincing machine: “Yo dawg, pass me some of that blunt force castration.”

This week we’ve got something different for you. The folks at Music Skins have provided us with custom decals for Guitar Hero and Rock Band guitars, each with Coheed & Cambria printed branding and actual signatures of every band member. We’ve got 3 models; 2 of them are for the Rock Band Guitar (Stratocaster) and one is for the Guitar Hero guitar for Wii (Les Paul model). Even if you don’t have a practical use for these decals you should still enter the contest, because they’re pretty fucking cool as a piece of rock memorabilia on their own.

Just come up with a funny caption to the photo below (sent in by Nikkü), and remember to use a real email address (not a Facebook Connect login).

metal recycling

Tags: ,
  • Sacajawea

    Do you see now what happens when you ditch your baby in a dumpster?

  • Mike2

    You’re kidding right? You’re not actually giving away fucking Guitar Hero decals, are you?

    Lame.

    • Malacoda

      Yeah. I don’t even want to enter this because:

      A. It’s Coheed and Cambria, who I don’t like
      B. It’s Guitar Hero, which I suck at, don’t like, and don’t play.

      • Dick Asskiss

        Sell it on Ebay.

        • Matthew Grant Anson

          Or you don’t want to enter because you’re not humorous, clever, or worthwhile.

          “Wahhhh the stuff you guys generously give out for free I don’t like, wahhh!”

          • http://myspace.com/shepherdsgatemusic,myspace.com/burymeinsmokemusic Michael “The Armenian Demon” Fenton

            Nice use of Artie!

          • BTK666

            Yeah Mike2, why don’t you go tell your Mom her vagina was too tight on the way through, it’s practically the same thing. Seriously, go to her and tell her you believe the damage caused by her overly-taught snizz is what makes you such a fuck-wit. Then tell her I’ll see her tomorrow night as usual. Good boy.

    • BTK666

      Douche. Total Douche.

  • jake ismert

    “oscar your a grouch”

    “Bitch! i live in a fucking trash can”

    • Nikki

      haha dave chapelle ^^

  • Double D

    Shit, I had something really hilarious to say until I saw the prize…

  • d.o.g.o.b.g.y.n.

    “Weird Al” does research for his upcoming Brian Posehn parody entitled “Metal In Dumpsters”.

  • Duff

    Writing process behind Slayer’s albums revealed.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jeremy-Sanchez/512283152 Jeremy Sanchez

      Win.

      Fucking win.

      No contest.

      Hilarious!!!!!!!!!!! :D

    • Matthew Grant Anson

      Damn you, I was just about to write the exact same thing :|

      You’d better win.

    • http://www.themetalreporter.net iRoar

      This picture is fucking EPIC!!!

    • http://www.themetalreporter.net iRoar

      wIN!!

  • Chet Stedman

    When Chad Kroeger’s mom asked him to take out the trash, he had no other choice than to throw himself in the dumpster.

  • Double D

    I’ve been wondering how those Facebook guys manage to collect their prizes.

  • Ilona

    Don’t forget to use the “H” when you say your starting a thrash metal band.

    • Double D

      I don’t know if this is going to win, but it is a decent effort. Great job.

      • Trux

        WIN !!

    • Discipleofthewatch

      I like it!

  • Kuranes

    Lester’s bandmates finally got tired of his recycled riffs.

    • Double D

      Like this one, a lot.

  • Nifkin

    Here Paul tries to make the most out of being stuffed in the garbage by the jocks. You go Paul; nobody can take that away from you.

  • Patrick

    White Trash , Yellow Can

  • cougar party

    That’s actually an awesome picture.

  • wordmcface

    the before picture of a dude about to get blasted in the face with guitar hero pickguards covered with autographed stickers from coheed and cambria.

  • RockOutWithMy…YouKnow

    Here you see the elusive Ziltoid slinking back into his recesses after schooling some scene kid in what is troo.

    • RockOutWithMy…YouKnow

      Now that I’m reading this again, it’s awful. This makes me sounds like I think Ziltoid makes good points. What an asshole I am!!

  • Ilona

    Somewhere out there is a pair of legs roaming around with a red lid on top. Another successful experiment performed in the laboratory of stoner inventors.

  • Alex_P

    Why can’t you give away a Guitar Hero guitar? That would be awesome.

  • Gaia

    What the fuck is vidro?

    • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

      Glass

  • Chief

    When going green turns black.

    • Facebook User

      WIN LMFAO

    • Ty

      Hahaha that’s pretty clever.

  • Sacajawea

    “My friend Vidro would be great for this picture. He could get in the red can!”

  • louis

    this was actually the inspiration for the song where the slime live

  • http://schenkeltown.blogspot.com SchenkelTown

    municipal waste

    • Poopenshaft

      Ok wtf, I swear I didn’t see that before I typed mine in. douchecanoe.

  • Poopenshaft

    This is actually the cover of the next Municipal Waste album appropriately entitled ‘Kill Your Parents, Recycle Your Plastics’.

    • BoomBoomDoom

      i lol’d

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kenneth-Blair-Griffin/519347011 Kenneth Blair Griffin

      I laughed, and clapped. Good show sir.

    • http://schenkeltown.blogspot.com SchenkelTown

      it’s ok, neither of us wrote anything very witty

      • Poopenshaft

        i beg to differ, you simply named a band while I used my brain – big difference.

        • TommyGunn

          pwnt

  • Stiggs

    Look, mixing the plastic and paper recyclables is not going to make Gojira write another album similar to “From Mars to Sirius”.

  • brookh

    Axl trying to get Joe Duplantier’s attention

  • Sacajawea

    He’s dead, in a trash can, and rats have been nibbling on his flesh.

    He’s a CAN-NIBBLE CORPSE!

    I’m sorry.

    • cougar party

      You should win for the apology. That made me laugh.

    • I less than 3 crabcore

      I don’t know why but I can’t stop laughing. The apology was hilarious.

  • Moyles

    Abuse and Reuse. Dont you want to hear the same shit 10 years from now?

  • Travis

    far before Dimbag made “Reinventing the steel” with pantera, he had a solo project, “Recycling the steel”

  • Benito

    …dude, Vidro slays.

  • moses valenzuela

    Everybody who bought it should have done this to Chinese Democracy!

  • Alkahest

    That must be where Adam D. finds those recycled riffs.

    • Mike Arose

      You make a Great observation with that

  • moses valenzuela

    Where Kanye West gets ALL his “original” music from.

  • Ryan

    The bastard child of Kirk Hammett and Joe Duplantier.

  • 10000 Gays

    Not as bad as the trash you find in the red “Juggalo” bin

  • canea

    Metalheads don’t die; they recycle themselves.

  • AATHD

    He can fit inside your rectum too!

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    In his quest for the perfect Soundgarden parody, Weird Al searches the depths of Chris Cornell’s career only to emerge drawing flies.

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    Trashed, Tossed, and Flung Out

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Keith-Brown/537636633 Keith Brown

    The average Coheed and Cambria fan gives up on trying to get people to like his favorite band and goes where most metalheads tell him to go when he mentions them

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    Quick! To the HazMat Cave!

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    The resurrected Jesús emerges from his tomb on the dawn of the first metal Easter.

  • The Ogre

    True metal heads aren’t born….

  • http://lavidastrangiato.blogspot.com/ Jake Strangiato

    I don’t have a caption, which sucks because I really, really want the prize. Coheed is my favorite band of all time after Metallica and Rush. :(

  • http://myspace.com/shepherdsgatemusic,myspace.com/burymeinsmokemusic Michael “The Armenian Demon” Fenton

    Municipal Waste….what’s that? People already wrote that? Damn…alright, alright ummmmmmmmm……E. Town Concrete? I give up!

  • http://myspace.com/shepherdsgatemusic,myspace.com/burymeinsmokemusic Michael “The Armenian Demon” Fenton

    The birth of Bay Area Trash Metal!

    • SP420

      What a fucking moronic statement.

  • Vakarm

    Metal Municipal Waste can be recycled

  • Facebook User

    “Who sent out the memo that said yellow wasnt metal?”

  • Ryan

    Even at a young age, Paul Waggoner was interested in protecting the environment.

    • Brownsound

      this

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    Junkcore

  • Baldish

    This must be why we get the same sounding stuff coming out all the time. This is also where Metallica must put their ideas.

  • Watty

    Dana Carvey wants to know:

    “Is he not ‘metally’ enough for the ‘Thrash Can’ Club?”

  • Samot

    Environment starts to improve!
    You’re not trashing all around!
    Acting responsibly…

    WHY TRASH?!

  • SomeKid

    He’ll get recycled into a hipster if he doesn’t get out fast.

    • http://www.gravatar.com/avatar/46e389eb8b79606050d3d447431ff6ac?s=80 Nate

      This event does actually happen folks, IWABO is living proof that if you leave a metalhead out to be reprocessed, he’ll become an abomination.

  • SomeKid

    And if the camera could have panned over just a little to the left, you could have seen two MetalSucks commenters arguing about whether they should be in the Post-Hardcore Melodic Viking bin, or the Melodic Sumerian-deathcore bin.

  • Zombie(really)

    In an attempt to impress Vince, Axl Rosenberg tries his best to show his friend how ‘metal’ he really is.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mathew-James-Saunders/1153389571 Mathew James Saunders

    Simply a form of rebelling against a dead beat mom who’s too fat and lazy to leave the sofa and vibrator behind, “If that dumb bitch wont drive me to see Gojira live, I’ll be delivered straight to Toxic Garbage Island myself!”

  • BTK666

    Recycling: Not just for Hippies.

  • john

    And this is the story of how crab core began

  • BTK666

    The “Core” recycling system was seemed to be working well, Death-core in the red bins, Metal-core in the yellow, and in anticipation of the next craze the Vidro-core bins were lined and ready. Unfortunately, Unearth and All That Remains started fucking in the bottom of the yellow bin. Ladies and gentlemen I give you the bane of our existence in 2010…… Unearth The Remains.

    • Samot

      haha vidro-core…

  • BTK666

    After contracting AIDS from a used needle at the bottom of the bin, Barry decided to start listening to Jazz.

  • BTK666

    Suicide Silence really, REALLY wanted to be known as a Metal band.

  • Killer Kovarik

    TRUE TRASH METAL!!!!

  • BTK666

    Roadrunner Records in 2011

    • http://URI Will

      winner!

  • http://myspace.com/shepherdsgatemusic,myspace.com/burymeinsmokemusic Michael “The Armenian Demon” Fenton

    “Seriously dudes, I can’t get out of this thing.”

  • John The Drummer

    And this folks is how Metalcore is made.

  • Alex

    Ah, so there’s where Metallica’s been living since the Black album.

  • needly needly doo

    put your 50 cents in the vidro 3000 and out the other side comes a fully equipped metal nerd

  • akeldama

    That kid actually wants this prize.

  • Scrambles

    How to fire your singer and still be eco-friendly.

  • I less than 3 crabcore

    Cover for Weird Al’s new album “Dare to be Metal”

    PS I dont want the prize (Not that i think i will win)

  • IAmTheClitCommander

    He’s hiding from the shitty Coheed and Cambria set.

  • Ddon

    Dooood…. look at this sweet bracelet I found in the garbage, quick get your phone out !

    • BTK666

      Quality.

  • Vakarm

    How editors and writters come about their end-of-decade lists ideas

  • Octillus

    I think this just speaks for itself.

  • The Ogre

    You vant to play like Garbage? Be the Garbage.

  • Dylan Rutherford

    This is the accumulation of recycled breakdowns and riffs over the past years.

  • TylerMellander

    2012: The last metalhead dies in captivity, is recycled

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Cody-Foss/1377605651 Cody Foss

    Al Gore has really come a long way.

    E-Mail: Codyfoss@live.com

  • Jonathan

    And Oscar finally moves away from Sesame street…

  • 6infinite6hatred6

    Where screamo started from death metal started from thrash metal started from acid metal started from psychedelic rock started from…

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Zach-Dolan/100000151486558 Zach Dolan

    This picture is too epic for a caption.

  • Devon Czekaj

    Where John Schaffer finds his inspiration.

  • Grizzle

    How to make Metal: Add hair, war bracelet, the horns, a sexually repressed nerd, and recycle ad infinitum.

  • Chaingun Crazy

    “The factory stopped making headbangers in 1986, but thanks to Metal Conservation and Reclamation efforts, we still have most of them with us today”

  • rachel

    Circa 1978 photo of Judas Priest member looking for inspiration for a new album, which became titled British Steel shortly after this scene.

  • mongorian

    Ziltoid’s last defense against false metal.

  • DICKHOLE

    look its metal’s version of oscar the grouch

  • Ben Cooke

    During his time in prison, Varg Vikernes did a very short stint in solitary confinement after the guards realized he enjoyed it too much.

  • Shiggy Shack

    Death Magnetic

  • josecarnage

    new attack attack singer thinks this makes him more metal

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    Applecore

  • Thrashbuster

    Rise of a New Genre.

    Green Metal.

  • WowWee!

    Metal Injection’s Thrash it or Trash it makes one musician take it too seriously.

  • vaste burai

    “It shall take 3 pence to climb thy stairs!” said mortiis the stair troll.

  • megalodon5

    Draonforce’s ZP Theart after the bank foreclosed on his house.

  • GunMetalGrey

    I see he is looking for that damn Gold Cobra.

  • hellboar

    No bro, thats NOT what MIOBRO 4000 means…

  • Mike

    What Jon Schaffer’s riffs look like before they’re recycled…

  • Ass Dan of the Northwoods

    Ha! Trash metal.

  • BJ Scarberry

    “I’ve searched this entire bin…..Kerry didn’t use a single thing in here for World Painted Blood! However, the Br00tal Deathcore Scoops Bin is bone dry.”

  • BTK666

    Alas, Axl’s dignity wasn’t at the bottom of the bin.

  • BTK666

    Strategically using the devil horns to cover the logo on his Alter Bridge t-shirt, Gavin felt confident he’d finally taken the ultimate Myspace profile pic….. Getting out of the bin was proving to be a little bit more of a challenge.

  • BTK666

    The Metal Bin was getting a little bit tired of this shit.

  • dEV

    Now that’s a real shame when folks be throwin’ away a perfectly good white boy like that.

    • BruisedMetal

      Iv never seen better off dead ever

  • BTK666

    An Inconvenient Douche.

  • MetalStew

    The true origin of Thrash Metal was born from Trash Metal.

  • terrybeans84

    “You should’nt recycle metal. I threw out a motograter CD and got back Five Finger Death Punch.”

  • eddie

    The metalcore scene (post Botch) summed up in a nutshell!

  • Awful Offal Carnage

    Metal Blade Records hired an intern to search for more generic deathcore/metalcore bands to sign. Luckily, he knew exactly where to search.

  • Joe the Destroyer

    Claudio Sanchez finally realized he’s fucking garbage.

    • http://URI Will

      boo!

  • CT

    Fuck global warming. Please dont recycle

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jeremy-Sanchez/512283152 Jeremy Sanchez

    “This is what happens when Sesame Street gets signed to Roadrunner Records. Presenting your new Oscar the Grouch.”

  • bonercopter

    MetalSucks: The Picture

    get it? because you guys are fucking trash

  • BruisedMetal

    Weird Al’s metal album was complete garbage

  • derp derp derp

    recycle old metal to make nu metal!

  • Shiggy Shack

    When you recycle grungy thrash kids, you save 5% of the ozone layer

  • hellboar

    The Thrash Bin

  • zac

    o god, now they have recyclecore, what else will they think of?

  • David

    Even Weird Al has decided to jump on the metal bandwagon.

  • dethodeth

    You’ve heard of Black Metal? Now there’s Yellow Metal: brutal, yet cheerful.

  • http://MusicSkins.com Johnny Metal

    “Brokencyde’s version of metal…trash!’

  • jonowev

    Little did we know that Oscar from Sesame Street used to be a massive Burzum fan

  • josh

    The new “white trash” cover art has been released

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    Algorecore

  • CoreyRapture

    Mainstream Metal: The same recycled garbage, over and over. Now with “vintage retro” spiked bracelets.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Nixon/1541724225 Robert Nixon

    So that is where Ronnie James Dio’s unwanted love child went!

    This is how I got in backstage at the recycle a whore festival in 09.

  • Cancrum Oris

    This is where Slipknot fans ages 15+ go.

  • pigchop

    TRASH METAL RULES!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-Burchett/512785027 Anthony Burchett

    Kirk Hammet and all of the recycled riffs that will end up on the next Metallica album.

  • http://hookinmouth.net Scott

    Thrash Metal…getting recycled since 1983.

  • Chase

    the great evolution of metal all the riffs and sounds are recycled and used for the next great sound in metal

  • http://skinnytees.spreadshirt.net/en/GB/Shop/Article/Index/article/Crabcore---killing-metal-one-shuffle-at-a-time-10047491 EdSW

    Recycled Metal. That’s right, the new wave of Thrash isn’t original.

  • http://uponwingsofblack.blogspot.com/ \m/Eluveitie\m/

    I’ve never seen so many trashy recycled captions before.

  • http://spinelanguage.wordpress.com spinelanguage

    Desperate for a song that would make him rich in Hot Topic money, Jasper knew there was only one place to go: the metal recycling bin, where all In Flames/Pantera/Meshuggah riffs go to die.

  • RenegadeDave

    “Kill Switch Engage has entered the pre-writing stages for their next album”

  • F-Bomb

    New metal bands lack originality nowadays; they only recycle each other’s trash.

  • Maximus

    Demi Levato: Before the makeover

  • http://URI Will

    the first ever pictures of Dio’s fountain of youth

  • Wyzt

    Oscar the Kvltch

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-P-Stine/1314021455 Anthony P Stine

    A rare picture from Weird Al’s early metal years.

  • Sambo

    Recycling: the new alternative to hardcore dancing.

  • SYL Townsend

    “and here we see Dez Fafara looking for lyrics and guitar riffs in the recycled metal bin”

  • Nocturne

    “A little something got lost along the way when Unearth fans decided ‘Recycling Anatomy’ was not just a song, but a suggestion.”

  • Shiggy Shack

    Anything post 1984

  • The Ogre

    Trying to improve their image, Victory Records offer luxury hotel suites to their bands on tour

  • BTK666

    The file “Metal-core” is too big for the Recycle Bin. Do you wish to delete it permanently?

  • BTK666

    This was taken about 10 minutes after last weeks funny photo. Turns out that the first inaugural Compton Metal Fest was also going to be the last.

  • BTK666

    Fearful his new project would be labeled as some kind of “core” band, Gavin decided to pigeonhole himself.

  • BTK666

    After seeing this photo, The Metal Bin decided to do something about his head lice.

    • BTK666

      My apologies if some of these are lame, I just really want this prize.

  • Kerry your fucking dead

    Trash Metal!

  • BTK666

    After recently breaking his programming and discovering Metal, Dalek 279 changed his name to Dalek 666.

  • Stephen

    “Thrash Can”.
    Forgive me if someone already said this.

  • Chad E. Death

    Welcome To Trashcore , Grouch!!!!

  • metalliman

    Trash metal

  • Dave

    Metal isn’t garbage, it’s recyclable.

  • DevinGilmour

    oh wait, that’s not metal..

  • http://www.theoppositionmachine.wordpress.com the opposition machine

    stephen o malley emerges from yet another sunn recording session…

  • \m/Eluveitie\m/

    Luis Smells, Refuse Lyin’

  • http://www.kingdomofnoise.blogspot.com MetalMatt

    If it’s not metal…it’s SCRAP!

  • http://www.kingdomofnoise.blogspot.com MetalMatt

    After Dino found a new singer for Divine Heresy, the recycled FF riffs were in the very next bin.

  • http://www.kingdomofnoise.blogspot.com MetalMatt

    Jocks are getting lazy.

  • Brandon Guim

    “Recycle metal, because creating something new just isn’t that cool.”

  • BTK666

    Dave Mustaine and Zakk Wylde were just glad to have a bit of company, it got awfully lonely in there sometimes.

  • BTK666

    Five Finger Death Punch find their missing band mate.

  • BTK666

    His mum was going to kill him when she saw the stains, but for the first time in his life Gavin actually felt cool.

  • BTK666

    While slightly less attractive than her predecessors, the most recent Winds Of Plague Keyboardist/ Token Vagina to be sacked by the band remained optimistic.

  • Cornelius

    “The typical result of a Christian up-bringing.”

  • BTK666

    The not-so-sharps container

  • pigchop

    The new ‘cross-over’ movement: Sesame Street meets Trash Metal.

  • BTK666

    Grug goes to Hellfest

  • BTK666

    Taking the lyrics to Devin Townsend’s “Earth Day” a little too seriously.

  • http://www.metalophemia.com AMP

    Look what happens when you recycle metal.

  • Corey borger

    Every poser that dies ends up in a trashcan for eternity. Not sure what the fuck video is though.

    • Corey borger

      Vidro. Fuckin foreign shit.

  • http://www.metalophemia.com AMP

    Dee Snider still trying to prove he’s metal.

  • DetectiveJohnKimble

    Emmure attempts to recycle fans of real metal into flat bill-wearing, siq gauge-sporting Frankie fans.

  • BTK666

    Toxic Garbage Island Hotel’s rooms weren’t the biggest, but they suited the basic needs of the traveling Metal head.

  • FlyingDadBomb

    I have a couple:

    “The actual origins of Attack Attack!”

    and

    “And that’s where the emo babies come from…for machines!”

  • Ryan

    John threw the horns and thanked the metal gods
    for those ignorant fools getting it right this time and
    not throwing him in the ‘emo’ bin

  • DetectiveJohnKimble

    Donated and resold at a Hot Topic near you

  • MT

    Contrary to popular believe nu-metal is not recyclable….

  • Brandon Guim

    I once heard it takes one retard in a dumpster to make the same music Slipknot does..
    I guess this is that retard.

    • BTK666

      I think it’s actually two retards. One to sit in it and one to hit it with a baseball bat.

  • BTK666

    Fuck the Whales, save Metal!

  • BTK666

    Matt Heafy takes us back to where it all began.

  • http://www.myspace.com/FatCameron FatCameron

    Chad Kroeger sent his guitar tech searching for ideas. Unfortunately, the METAL bin was empty, and the PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR ROCK bin was nowhere to be found.

  • Sterling

    One man’s metal is another man’s tre…well this is still garbage.

    • Sterling

      Also, this is the actual recording studio for all Victory Records artists asides from BTBAM.