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Book Reviews, Upcoming Bullshit

I AM OZZY AUTOBIOGRAPHY PISSES ON U.S. BOOKSHELVES TODAY

 Monday, January 25th, 2010 at 9:11am by

Ozzy Osbourne gets plenty of crap around here at the Mansion – much of it deserved, some not so much. Regardless of the punching bag the Ozz-man has become over the last decade, there is no denying he is the epitome of a metal legend.

He’s also one funny motherfucker!

Now it’s time to learn even more about the Prince of Darkness from his own garbled mouth in his first autobiography, I Am Ozzy, which hits U.S. shelves today. The book was released in the U.K. in 2009.

I have not received a copy of the frog hopper’s tell-all just yet, so no review. But if you want to take a peek for yourself, be sure to head over here and sample nearly 40 pages for free.

Listen to a really silly audio excerpt here. They’ve hired some other bloke to voice act for Ozzy and it just doesn’t fly. When you think of Ozzy you just can’t help but hear those slurred words that only he can string together.

By the time this gets posted, Ozzy will have already been on The Today Show. He is expected to return to the same program with his wife and testicle-holder Sharon Osbourne on Wednesday. No doubt, some NBC/Celebrity Apprentice incestuous synergy going on there.

Even cooler is that Ozzy will be conducting a book tour to support his stab at Frank McCourtisms. Here are the tour dates according to Ozzy.com which include two appearances tonight:

Monday January 25th
12:30pm: BARNES AND NOBLE
555 Fifth Avenue at 46th St
New York, NY

6:00pm: BOOKENDS
232 East Ridgewood Avenue
Ridgewood, NJ

Tuesday January 26th
7:00pm: BORDERS
10 Columbus Circle
New York, NY

Wednesday January 27th
6:00pm: BORDERS
1 S. Broad St, Ste. 100
Philadelphia, PA

Thursday January 28th
7:00pm: BARNES & NOBLE COLLEGE BOOKSTORES
660 Beacon St
Boston, MA

Saturday January 30th
1:00pm: BARNES AND NOBLE
55 Old Orchard Center
Skokie, IL

Tuesday February 2nd
7:00pm: BOOK SOUP
8818 Sunset Blvd
West Hollywood, CA

Wednesday February 3rd
7:00pm: BARNES AND NOBLE
7881 Edinger Ave
Huntington Beach, CA

“Evil thoughts and evil doings.”

-CM

Corey Mitchell is a best-selling author of true crime books and founder of In Cold Blog. Join him on Facebook and Twitter. His next book, SAVAGE SON, can be pre-ordered now.

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  • DemonicLemming

    I really, really, really hope Sharon had as little to do with the book and book tour as possible. I think sans Sharon, Ozzy’s later years would have turned out a whole hell of a lot differently. Not too big into autobiographies, but I might flip through it next time I hit Borders.

    • Metal Fuckin’ Dave

      Oh you know that is not possible. She probably sat in for Ozzy while it was written.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Corey-Mitchell/660352330 Corey Mitchell

        After reading a few of these so-called rock “autobiographies” this year, I am really curious to know how many of these rock stars actually even participated in telling their own stories. Hopefully, Ozzy had some input in this one. He does have a co-author named Chris Ayres.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Corey-Mitchell/660352330 Corey Mitchell

      Now seriously, DemLem, do you really think Sharon isn’t going to have her talons in the mix?

      • DemonicLemming

        No, not really, but we all have hopes and dreams that have to be brutally curbstomped, right?

  • Cryzthormagnusian

    God, that voice actor is horrible. It’s so…fucking horrible. I’d rather have Ozzy do it and not understand half of it than listen to that guy.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Corey-Mitchell/660352330 Corey Mitchell

      Amen, brother. I guess Sharon missed the boat when they hired that bloke. Or, some form of distorted nepotism is at play.

  • thehatemachine

    I just read the preview of the book. I have been bummed out over what Ozzy became in the last decade or so. I truly believe that Sharon manipulates him like a puppet. On one hand i see from reading the book and all the other interviews throughout the years that he really is a simple person and not the Metal super hero i always held him up as growing up. I can even understand her driving him to make money. They do have a family and it takes money to have a good life for them. After reading those chapters i think people are way too hard on him. Ultimately he shouldnt give a fuck what people say or think because what really mattered to me about Ozzy was the music and that guy will be a legend for decades to come.
    As a musician i can say that he is the single biggest influence i have had in my 30 years of playing metal . What would life be like if we never had Sabbath to get stoned to when we were kids? Or the first time you heard Mr. Crowley and it made the hair stand up on your neck?

    I used to think that Ozzy should have hung up the mic years ago but, now i see he is going to go out like a “rock and roller” . because its better to burn out than fade away.
    I dont know about any of the other musicians that post on here but I would like to have lived half of the life Ozzy has and have spent my whole life chasing the magic of Sabbath trying to make my own memorable metal.
    Ozzy is right up there with Elvis i think. He is the Elvis of metal . The true Metal God. \m/

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Corey-Mitchell/660352330 Corey Mitchell

      Kudos on an excellent comment.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Richard-He/749730660 Richard He

    Having already read the book, I’d say it’s excellent – as far as ghostwritten autobiographies go, this one really captures Ozzy’s “voice”, so to speak. And it’s genuinely insightful, beyond just rattling off anecdotes like, say, Lemmy’s White Line Fever – everything that’s said about Randy Rhoads is incredibly moving.

    Certain events like his first meeting with Zakk Wylde are totally overlooked, and I wish there’d been a little more about the Sabbath years – but with Tony Iommi’s own autobiography coming out this year, that gap should be filled quite nicely…