Ozzy Osbourne gets plenty of crap around here at the Mansion – much of it deserved, some not so much. Regardless of the punching bag the Ozz-man has become over the last decade, there is no denying he is the epitome of a metal legend.

He’s also one funny motherfucker!

Now it’s time to learn even more about the Prince of Darkness from his own garbled mouth in his first autobiography, I Am Ozzy, which hits U.S. shelves today. The book was released in the U.K. in 2009.

Click to read more…

killkillkillkillkillkillkill / woofwoofwoofwoofwoof

Special thanks to Lady Poopinstein for sending this one in…

-KW

I haves seens manys weirds things at brunches. I haves seens mine uncles pours his chocolates milks over his pancakes. I haves seens mines friends gets up to take a bigs dump so he coulds keep eatings at the buffets. I haves sprinkled mushrooms in my crepes for a reals minds fuck. I haves seens brunches that weren’ts reallys brunches at alls. Spookies…

-NC

Sandy Eigo’s EARTHLESS weave together a formidable blend of shredderiffic classic rock / psychedelic stoner metal, and while the at-home listening experience requires the full-stop, no talking zone-out attention many of us so rarely have in our daily routines, in a live setting this shit bops n bounces n totally slays through epically searching musical journeys in a supremely palatable and jaw-dropping way…

We saw these guys absolutely kill in November opening up for Baroness, and save for one poor shmuck who just couldn’t get into it, all the other heads in the room were completely blown.

EARTHLESS — “Sonic Prayer” from Rhythms from a Cosmic Sky (2007)

-KW

Alright, so Vince is back Tuesday, which means the balance between light and dark should be restored here at the MetalSucks Mansion. What Vince doesn’t know is that I had Higgins make some… adjustments to Vince’s wing. Let’s just say I wouldn’t be sitting on the shitter when ya flush it, Vinnie. BWA-HA-HA!!!

Here’s what we did while Vince has been away:

• We spoke to the legendary Jello Biafra and DevilDriver’s Dez Fafara.
• God Forbid’s Doc Coyle broke down the breakdown, The Austerity Program’s Justin Foley ruminated some more on the format wars, andVertebrae33′s Rod Githens analyzed the best album covers of 2009.
• We checked out new releases by Six Feet Under, Valkyrja, Brainstorm, Trapped Under Ice and Sons of Azrael.
• Our staff chose some albums that will fuck your face off in 2010.
• The line-up for Mayhem Fest 2010 got the kids all riled up.
• Dave Mustaine and Kerry King <3 T.G.I.Friday’s.

Have a good weekend, everybody!!!

-AR

Yes, it’s true! Following-up on his exclusive interview with Donald Tardy of Obituary and the I Get Wet album, Vince’s hard-hitting investigation into the Andrew W.K.(s?) conspiracy continued late last week, as he was actually able to get A.W.K. – or whomever the hell is playing A.W.K. these days – on the phone. We’ll have the full interview for you next week, but in the meantime, here’s an excerpt:

Click to read more…

I don’t know what it is, but ever since I was a young guy I’ve typically had an aversion to trends, especially in music. Going to punk shows during my high school years, I’d laugh to myself at all the kids with the same spiky hair and leather jackets, who were obviously into the fashion or “scene” aspect of the music, rather than the music itself (of which, I’ll admit, I’m somewhat embarrassed to have been such a purist). More than a decade later, I haven’t really changed at all. I can’t help but write off many new bands these days, whether it’s a retro-thrash band named after an old Anthrax song, a long winded “post-metal” band with nautical themes, a bubble-lettered stoner rock band, a flat-brimmed nu-deth-shuggah band, or, quite possibly the most hilarious of them all, any black metal band still wearing corpsepaint that isn’t Immortal. All of this stuff comes off as tired and derivative to me, and with any style of music that becomes trendy, the posing is just too obvious.

But, I’m not here today to talk shit on popular bands. I’m here to talk to you all about a once relevant subgenre of music known as power metal, that couldn’t be further from “cool” right now. A friend of mine once referred to power metal as “the new punk rock” as if to say that at least playing punk music these days will get you laid. If someone is playing power metal, it’s probably because they are 100% down with that shit, regardless of how silly they may look to the rest of the world. And that, I have nothing but respect for.

Click to read more…

Kudos to Metal Insider for pointing us towards Mental Floss, a website now running a pretty brilliant game: “Lifetime Movie or Megadeth Song?” The game hinges on the very simple premise that, for example, you could really go either way with  name like “Verdict in Blood.” Which is a Lifetime movie, by the way. In case you for some reason didn’t know there’s no Megadeth song with that title.

Unless you really don’t know Megadeth that well, this game won’t keep you occupied for very long. And, granted, there’s probably a lot of metal bands who could theoretically have a song called “Verdict in Blood” or “Engaged to Kill.” So, clearly, this is another case of the goddamn biased media picking on poor Dave Mustaine.

-AR

The other night over beers some friends and I were saying it would be great if we could run a “Win a Signed Baby from Dino Cazares” contest on MetalSucks, wherein readers would submit their best recipes for babies, and the winner would get, y’know, a baby signed by Dino. It would be the best contest ever.

Obviously that’s never gonna happen ’cause adoption laws are real strict and shit, but The Gauntlet have come up with the next best thing – the “What is Dino Eating?” contest:

I was going through the audio from my Fear Factory interview with guitarist Dino Cazares and came across this sound bite and became curious as to what Dino might possibly be eating during the interview. Post your guess in the comments and the person with the best guess will get a Gauntlet shirt. In Dino’s defense, my interviews tend to run long with people I find interesting.

I don’t know how long the interview could have possibly run that Dino couldn’t wait – I mean, it’s not like their plane crashed and they were stranded in the mountains or something – but, hey, I applaud The Gauntlet’s ingenuity in designing this contest. Between that and the “Top Ten Rivalries Involving Dave Mustaine” list they published recently, I’d say they’re on a roll.

-AR

I think that people think that Sergeant D. is just dicking around when he talks about his love for bands that most of the metal community (or at least a substantial portion of the metal community – we might not have the majority on this shit these days) loathes. He names his website Stuff You Will Hate for a reason. He knows you’ll hate the stuff. He’s not being ironic. It’s one of the things that makes his writing so much fun to read.

Case in point: he endorses this band Worthwhile, who I would label softcore – because calling them hardcore would make them seem tougher than they are. Dudes in near matching uniforms jumping in unison? The run-in-place? “It’s our time to rise/ It’s our time to shine?” That’s why you don’t let thirteen year olds write lyrics.

If the gang from Saved by the Bell ever turned Zach Attack into a “hardcore” band, I think they might sound like Worthwhile.

Also… Worth-fucking-while? Really, guys?

-AR

Not that the video for “Sick Bubblegum,” the new Rob Zombie song, is startlingly original or great or anything. Y’know, Sherri Moon Zombie is in it. So that’s a real plot twist.

But I actually kinda like the song. It’s a Rob Zombie song. Write a catchy riff that doesn’t sound that different from your other catchy riffs, stick in an anthemic chorus, and repeat for four to five minutes. It’s not rocket science. But I’ll take this over most of the young pop metal bands making waves right now. And if doing this affords John 5 the opportunity to make another solo album, well, all the better.

“Sick Bubblegum” will be on the very poorly titled Hellbilly Deluxe 2, which is out February 2 on Roadrunner’s Redneck Division Loud & Proud imprint.

-AR

SMN just alerted me that a “fashionably “old school” Korn demo track,” entitled “My Time,” has leaked onto the internet. Out of morbid curiosity Because I hate myself As a sacrifice for you, the readers I really have no fucking idea why I listened to it, but, holy shit, is it awful. It makes me long for the days of… whatever the old fucking Korn songs were called. I think there was one where Jonathan Davis was all angsty and Fred Durst directed the video or something. That was better than this.

ANYWAY, if you care, listen to it now before it gets yanked from YouTube.

Korn’s new album, Who Gives a Shit?, will be out Who Gives a Shit 12th.

-AR

This shittiest papparazi photo ever was taken this past Tuesday night at The Tilted Kilt in Palm Desert by Mike “DJ Kermie” May.

It’s been thirty days since we heard that Steven Tyler was checking into rehab, which means that he may have wrapped up his twenty-eight days earlier this week. Then again, I seem to recall James Hetfield being in rehab for the amount of time some bands spend on multiple album cycles, so I guess that twenty-eight days thing isn’t written in stone.

Either way, I don’t take it as a good sign of Steven Tyler’s health that he was spotted in a bar – excuse me, a “pub” – on Tuesday evening.

Click to read more…

1. It would appear that the dudes in The Absence don’t take themselves too seriously, which is exactly the way every rational human being on this planet should lead his or her life.
2. It may very well be the closest I ever to get to actually being inside of Erik Rutan’s Mana Studios.
3. The Beard Cam.
4. It’s a friendly reminder that The Absence’s new album, Enemy Unbound, will fuck your face off sometime in the not-too-distant future.
5. The new music we get to hear all sounds fuck your face offingly awesome.

-AR

Last month we told you about Blood Into Wine, the new documentary about the winery owned by Tool’s Maynard James Keenan. The fascinating subject matter – both Maynard and the wine – combined with a cool trailer and the promise of cameos by Patton Oswalt, Bob Odenkirk, and some other famous people I care less about, suggested that this was, at the very least, going to be a fun movie.

Well, now it has release dates! The press release says that these are the “first nationwide screenings,” which suggests that other markets should get it soon. But that kind of decision often rests on how much money a film makes during its initial run. Which is my way of saying: if anyone sees this and it actually turns out to be good, please let us know, and please spread the word so that we get it here in NYC. Not be selfish or anything.

Release dates and locations after the jump.

Click to read more…

Given that I’m a jet setting go-getter always on the move, I didn’t have the time or the energy to rank my favorite EPs of 2009. But if I had, Defeater‘s Lost Ground 2×7″ would likely have topped that list. A concept record, it tells the tragic fictionalized tale of an African-American who serves in World War II, only to come home and end up a beggar praying for death. Furious and caustic, the music reflects the desperation of the subject matter (read the lyrics here) and reminds why Defeater are one of the best hardcore acts to come out of the 2000s so far.

West Coast hardcore folks can expect to hear tracks from this and their 2008 Bridge Nine debut Travels when the Boston-based band plays a run of dates in California, Idaho, Nevada, Oregon, and Washington. Opening for all of these dates is Northern California’s All Teeth, whose smart and noisy hardcore should naturally appeal to Defeater’s discerning fans. Defeater will bookend this two-week tour with a few New England dates (sadly, sans All Teeth), which are included below.

Click to read more…

It’s been great getting to meet some of our readers over these past few years. There are few things more gratifying than putting a face with a name and seeing that someone really actually does a give a shit about what we’re doing here at MetalSucks. I mean, I know we’re not curing cancer, but finding new and inventive ways to insult people is challenging, y’know?

And while Parker Werley is one reader I’ve never met, if I ever do, I am going to buy the dude a beer or ten, or get him really high, or both. Because he introduced me to Son of Aurelius. And Son of Aurelius are AWESOME.

Click to read more…

In an effort to address the requests of you, our beloved MetalSucks Maniacs, and run more reviews, we are now introducing a new column, “Bleeder’s Digest.” This will be quick, simple assessments of new and upcoming releases. We hope you enjoy…

Trapped Under Ice, Secrets of the World

Baltimore’s Trapped Under Ice have picked up considerable steam in their relatively short existence, with a coveted spot on last year’s killer 10 For $10 Tour and a trio of 7″ releases that have rapidly and exponentially earned them a following in the American hardcore scene. Boasting production from Dean Baltulonis (Another Victim, Goes Cube, Most Precious Blood), their debut album Secrets of the World clocks in at just under twenty-three minutes, and brandishes its menacing twelve tracks as if they were switchblades. Current metallic hardcore champions Terror make for an obvious reference point, but the rapped delivery of “Believe” and “Eye Hand” call to mind thuggish NYHC groups like Crown Of Thornz, a cited influence. Though the lyrical content is nothing new, highlights like “From Birth” and “World I Hate” nonetheless smolder with acridity and regret, memorably dueling guitars chugging and squealing alongside the embittered laments and defiant declarations of vocalist Justice. “TUI” and other satisfyingly uptempo cuts offer ample fodder for the circle pit savages, but this album sports a budding musicianship that’s uncharacteristic in a genre so unabashedly prone to uniformity.

(3 1/2 out of 5 horns)

-GS

Click to read more…

Vince and I had an AMAZING time at least year’s absolutely free Scion Rock Fest in Atlanta, GA. For the price of, well, nothing, we can to watch Mastodon, Neurosis, Pig Destroyer, Converge, Kylesa, Torche, Wolves in the Throne Room, Salome, and a host of other awesome bands. It was really quite the experience. And did I mention it was FREE?!?

Well, Toyota is it again this year, and Scion Rock Fest 2010 will take place on Saturday, March 13, this time in Columbus, OH. Vince and Kip Wingerschmidt are 100% committed to being there, and I’m trying to figure shit out right now. Meanwhile, the line-up is, once again, really killer. Check it out:

Click to read more…

GOOD MORNING! Sorry to get a late start today. But the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and it’s a wonderful thirty-four degrees here in NYC. What better way to start the day than with a healthy breakfast and some new black metal?

So. Valkyrja. I have almost no idea how you pronounce that name, but the band’ new album, Contamination, was released on Metal Blade earlier this week, and our own Sammy O’Hagar gave it a glowing review. Here’s an excerpt, in case you’re a dope and you didn’t read it:

Swedish upstarts Valkyrja have the big, groovy black metal formula down pat, employing stadium-sized guitars that manage to nod to black metal’s origins but not collapse under their own bloated weight. Like a good black metal album, it’s got wonderfully constructed, haunting songs as well as velocity; like a good metal album, it’s heavy as fuck. If you think you’d enjoy the genre’s minor key doomsday riffing if it had a little more balls to it, well, Valkyrja’s Contamination is the album for you.

Well that certainly sounds appealing, doesn’t it?

Lucky for you, the band is streaming a track off the album, “Solstice in Withdrawl,” here. And we think that you should go check it out. And tell ‘em Sammy O’Hagar sent you.

-AR