[Welcome to Mettā Mind Journal, the new MetalSucks column by Cynic guitarist/vocalist Paul Masvidal. Expect a new entry every Wednesday from Paul about life, art, music and the world at large. -Ed.]

One question that comes up a lot during interviews is, “So, how did the band start?” Sean Reinert and I met in elementary school at Gulliver Academy, in Miami, Florida. The principal was a lady named Mrs. K. who I severely offended time and time again just by being me. One day, in 6th grade, as I was walking to class, I ran into Mrs. K., who took one look at my hair that hung just below my shirt collar, and said, “Your hair’s too long. You need to come into my office.” I followed her down the hall, took a seat in her office, and staring me in the face was a plaque of the famous “Christ at 33” image. And out of my mouth came this:

“Would you have him cut his hair if he were a student at your school?” This pissed her off and she threw me out of her office, saying I wasn’t fit for her school. My mother came in and tried to reason with her, “Do you ask the kids to cut their nails? It’s just hair, another natural part of their body…and it’s not that long.” She didn’t like my mother, either.

I made it through 6th grade (it was the tale end of the school year) and went to a school called Riviera for 7th grade. It was smaller, more liberal, and they let me grow my hair out past my shoulders. I remember not liking how straight my hair was when it grew out, so my mother took me to the hair salon and got me a perm! It actually became embarrassing because I went from straight hair to spiral curls overnight, and most of my fellow classmates weren’t that impressed. I didn’t particularly like it, either. It was too much too soon. Luckily the curls relaxed quickly and I grew to appreciate what I had naturally. One of my fondest memories at that school was my suspension trick. I’d break a stink bomb in the corner of the classroom and the stench would be so horrid that we’d have to evacuate and sit outside. Of course the teacher would need someone to confess to the dirty deed, and that would be me… heh heh. I would then be sent home (mission accomplished!) where I could play my guitar in peace.

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After 6 nights of non-stop boozing my body was starting to tell me it was time to take a break. When I woke up Thursday morning I was tired and cranky. The first night of SXSW — or any gathering large or small, for that matter — is always a rager, right? Everyone’s so excited to see each other that they all go balls to the wall. Thursday morning I was feeling the cumulative effects of 6 days of boozing and the prior night’s activities and I decided to take a break from the sauce for a while.

I was up at 11 and treated myself to a nice sit-down breakfast at the hotel. I headed over to Emo’s with Frank from Metal Injection to hang our banners at Full Metal Texas before the Noon door time to find folks literally lined up around the block to get in. Word of special secret guest Dillinger Escape Plan had apparently gotten out, as if the free admission and a dozen other awesome bands weren’t enough to pique folks’ interest in the first place. Karnivool, Animals as Leaders, Darkest Hour, Howl, Amarna Reign and Iron Age were just a few of the many bands to play that absolutely killed.

The whole no booze thing was going pretty well. Until I was given a handful of drink tickets. I ordered up a Heineken tallboy and got about half-way through before the dames at RockPit.com accosted me for a quick interview. When I literally stopped mid-sentence because I drew a complete blank on which showcase I’d been at the night before I knew it was time to really put down the booze. Enough. For the rest of the day it was just water for this guy.

Onto the bands!

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After I posted an open letter of apology to Meek is Murder yesterday, MS reader Hendecahedron accused me of being sarcastic in my praise for the band. And while I can understand Hendecahedron’s instinct – I’m sarcastic an awful lot more than I’m sincere – in this case, I was being completely unironic. I am now fucking in LOVE with Meek is Murder. So in love with them that I’ve been listening to their EP, Mosquito Eater, pretty much on repeat since Monday night, taking only two breaks – once to listen to Nevermore’s The Obsidian Conspiracy, and once to listen to it again. (Of course, I also ate and showered and pooped and all that stuff, but I mean of my considerable time spent listening to music… you get it.) In other words, if I don’t cut it out with Mosquito Eater soon, I’m officially going to be bad my job (hold your jokes, peanut gallery).

And I’ll let you in on a little secret: you can download the EP for free on the band’s MySpace page (scroll down and look on the right-hand side for the link). I’m sure they’d much prefer if you paid for a physical copy, but they’re making it avail for zip zilch nada, so, y’know. They get it. Go download it now.

And expect me to continue to fawn over this band with a trace of sarcasm for some time to come.

-AR

Kamelot are one of those bands that I’ve heard about for-ever and never, ever actually listened to. Why, you ask? I dunno. Probably because they’re called “Kamelot.” That’s one of those band names that tells you everything you need to know before you ever hear a single note. Seriously. I don’t mean to judge a book by it’s cover, but like Doc Coyle said: if you went to see a band called “Fuck You in the Eye Socket” and they sounded like DragonForce, you’d feel pretty misled, right? And we all know what genre any band called “Kamelot,” or whose name is in any way a misspelling of something from a famous legend about knights and shit, is going to to play. But in case you’re a total dolt and are thinking “Grindcore?” right now, keep in mind that their albums always have titles like Epica and Dominion and Eternity for Men, and covers that look like this:

So, yeah. Power metal. And not good power metal, like Mercenary or Communic; power metal so cheesy you could mix it with your macaroni.

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Photo by Will Hawkins. Check out more awesome pics from Jesse’s gigs with KSE in NYC here.

Jesse Leach has found himself back in the headlines a lot as of late: after Howard Jones dropped of off Killswitch Engage’s recent tour amidst some pretty bizarre rumors, Leach briefly reunited with the band, much to the delight of many a KSE fan (including this one). This inevitably led to gossip that Leach might be re-joining the band – gossip that Leach won’t actually confirm or deny.

It’s also led to a sudden surge of interest in The Empire Shall Fall, Leach’s latest musical endeavor – which is great, ’cause they’re a good band and deserve the attention.

And so this seemed like a good time to ask Leach to ponder his own past, present, and future. In a recent e-mail exchange, Jesse told me, in great detail, about all of his various musical endeavors, including Killswitch Engage, Seemless, The Empire Shall Fall, and Times of Grace, a new project he’s doing with KSE’s Adam Dutkiewicz. Full transcript after the jump.

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Yesterday I asked you all if there were any metal covers of Mike Tyson’s Punch Out theme music. And… of course there are! Check out this MTPO theme music cover suggested by Jirky. What I like about it: it combines multiple theme songs from the game and isn’t overly mechanical / ProToolsed. What I don’t like about it: the vocals. Totally unnecessary!

I know Axl demanded a moratorium on fighting in music videos, and I totally support that. But I think we can make an exception for the above montage of Mike Tyson knockouts set to a metal tune. Tyson was the absolute baddest, scariest, most feared motherfucker on the entire planet for a moment in time in the ’80s. Watching him talk in old ringside interviews still makes me tremble, and watching some of these KO’s still makes me want to snuggle up in bed with my teddy bear. Whoever put this montage together could’ve chosen something better than August Burns Red as the soundtrack — I’m thinking a Suffocation track would’ve done the trick — but it’s still worth watching for Iron Fucking Mike.

-VN

We’re giving away a signed Arsis shirt for “Completely Unreadable Band Logo” this week, but one reader, Bretton Melanson actually e-mailed me to say that while he can’t read the logo, he doesn’t give a shit – ’cause he made his own Arsis shirt and got it signed when he saw the band play the MetalSucks-sponsored Tyrants of Evil North American Tour 2010 with Arch Enemy, Exodus, and Mutiny Within. And, I gotta say, the shirt he made is pretty funny. Here are some pics of Bretton with the band:

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Let there be no doubt that the Deftones guys have tons of interesting shit to discuss in interviews around their sixth (seventh, technically?) album, Diamond Eyes. I wonder how repetitive it will feel to them, continuously explaining what was like to record without Chi Cheng, their severely injured bass player whom everybody misses. And I bet more than a few journos will wonder why the release date of Diamond Eyes was pushed up from May 18 to May 4, as it was announced last week. Me, I gotta know if they, too, sing the album’s title to each other like the verses in “Smooth Operator.” Like for example, “Hey guys, let’s get back to work on the mastering of our new record Dia-mond Eyyyyyyy-yyyyyyes.“

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Despite the urging of many a trusted metalhead over the past few years I never really sat down with Ion Dissonance‘s music until a few days ago. As is so often the case I was immediately taken aback by what I’d been missing out on.

OMG SUPER BLOGGER NEILSTEIN DOESN’T KNOW ABOUT EVERY BAND EVER!!! CALL THE METAL POLICE!!! PWNED!!!

So yeah it’s like this band was pretty much made for me, and they’re not of the proggy-weird ilk that I usually blog about. Ion Dissonance are way more immediately identifiable as “Axl music,” which is to say they’re incredibly brutal. As with any Neilstein entry there’s a good amount of technicality in the mix, but it comes in the form of original wave deathcore-ish mind-fuckery ala The Red Chord or fellow Canadians Despised Icon. There are also trace elements of Gojira / Morbid Angel and Meshuggah in the mix, and even some Dillinger-style dissonance (hardee har!) making these guys an all around win.

Noisecreep tells us Ion Dissonance just finished up recording a new album, the follow-up to 2007′s Minus the Herd. Expect it to be released sometime this summer on…. on…. could it be that this band is without a record label? Crikey, someone get on top of that.

-VN

Well, well, Jeff Loomis, haven’t you been busy! First you recorded a guest solo for the band 7 Horns 7 Eyes, then you went ahead and announced the release info for a new Nevermore album, The Obsidian Conspiracy (which we’ve now heard and can safely tell you is totally fucking awesome), and now you’ve gone and recorded another guest solo for a young band… Periphery!

Yes, it’s true. In a MySpace blog post that pays homage to 30 Rock and is addressed to “Ladjies and Djentlemen,” Periphery reveal that “We are honored to have JEFF LOOMIS of NEVERMORE on our record, who performed a guest solo!!” As if you needed more reason to be stoked for Periphery’s self-titled debut, which comes out on 4/20.

We’re glad this happened. We like it when musicians whose work we admire all play in the same sandbox.

And I think Vince will tell you more about the epic excellence that is Nevermore’s The Obsidian Conspiracy soon.

-AR

‘Cause he’s Wailin! ‘Cause his whole philosophy revolves around showmanship. Five facets in particular; the gear, the threads, the performance, the groove, and the vocal. The following clips will demonstrate precisely what he has to offer; no second takes, and no voiceovers. So let’s get started, eh?

Wailin, that big money gig is coming any day now. Just keep on persevering.

-VN

Thanks: Paulo Gregoletto

I’ve seen Sam Worthington in two movies now, Avatard and Terminator Suckvation. In case you can’t tell, I did not enjoy either movie. I also did not enjoy Mr. Worthington’s performance in either movie. Primarily because it’s hard to believe that any man is an American when he so clearly has an Australian accent. I mean, I can suspend disbelief and all that, but you gotta give me something to work with, y’know?

But I guess I should be nice to Sammy. ‘Cause Sean “Spleen Latifa” Gresens from Metal Injection just sent me an interview Worthington did for MTV to promote his latest thing I’m not sure why I’m going to see even though I know I’m going to see it, Clash of the Titans. And, as you can see, Sammy is a Baroness fan. Or fucked a Baroness fan and took her (his?) shirt before running out the door to do this interview. Either way.

Alright. Anyone who likes Baroness can’t be all bad, right? I mean, at least now we’d have something to talk about, other than “So many people standing around the Terminator set and no one ever said aloud ‘Hey, guys, this isn’t working?’”

You can watch the actual interview after the jump. Unfortunately, the topic of Baroness never comes up – they just blabber on and on about the Clash of the Titans remake, which is going to be superior of the original by virtue of being shot in 2-D but then being shittily converted to 3-D, having CGI instead of Harryhausen, and the bad guy from Casino Royale. Yeah, that sounds like two hours well-spent.

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I’d actually argue that we’re in the middle of the same old era of corruption that we have been for some time – most of my life, if not even longer – but, hey, A New Era of Corruption is a pretty cool album title. And while I have no idea what the album art has to do with the title, it’s pretty frickin’ metal:

I haven’t been a huge Whitechapel fan in the past, but I’m open to having my mind changed if the album rocks hard enough. It comes out June 8 on Metal Blade.

-AR

From the “Holy shit, fo’ real?” department comes /Film’s reminder that the original live-action Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was released TWENTY YEARS AGO today. I’m fairly certain Vince and I (and some other friends) saw this together at an old RKO movie theater that is now an Equinox Gym. That makes me feel old, the same way I feel old when I hear “Smells Like Teen Spirit” on a classic rock station.

So in real life, the Ninja Turtles would now be struggling with kids, divorce, and the disappointment of knowing that defeating Shredder was the apex of their lives; luckily, they’re only make-believe, so they can go on being pizza-loving adolescents forever and ever and ever.

And so, to celebrate the fact that I keep getting old while these Ninja Turtles just stay the same age, here, yet again, is the Teenage Mutant Hardcore Turtles video, which, for me at least, never really gets old:

-AR

I’m barely mature enough to even be able to imagine someday proposing to a woman, but if I was going to imagine it, I don’t think the setting would be someplace really public where other people had to watch and applaud. And even if the setting were someplace public, I don’t think that public place would be on-stage at a metal show. And even if it were on-stage at a metal show, I don’t think I’d wear the shirt of the band whose gig it is. And… really, there’s just all kinds of wrong with this.

That being said, I don’t begrudge any couple their happiness, and I sincerely hope for the best for these kids. Also, I gotta admit, even as someone who doesn’t like Fear Factory, it was very cool of the band to allow a fan to do this.

If they get divorced, do you think he’ll wear a Divine Heresy shirt to the proceedings?

-AR

[via Blabbermouth]

Yes, it’s true. Because Brides of Destruction, Methods of Mayhem, Sixx A.M., and Tommy Lee and Vince Neil’s solo efforts all burned up the charts, Mick Mars has decided to follow in the footsteps of the rest of his Crue and try his hand at making a solo album. It’s no surprise that it took Mick this long to catch up with the other guys, seeing as he is now made mostly of stone.

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Hip-hip-hoo-ray for Jason Burris, who correctly identified last week’s logo as that of the band Triste. Jason wins a Rotting Christ luggage tag, which is sure to make him the hit of his next flight and the talk of baggage handlers-everywhere. You work it, Jason!

Alas, all good things must end, and so March is Metal Month is rapidly coming to its conclusion. But we have one last super-duper prize to celebrate – a signed shirt from Arsis! It’s Arsis! It’s a shirt! It’s signed! You want it! So enter this contest!

All you have to do to win is identify the name of the band whose logo appears below, then shoot me an e-mail at axl AT metalsucks DOT net with your answer, your name, and your address. From everyone who gets it right, we’ll randomly select one winner and announce his or her name next week.

And it’s Isaac Schwarz again FTW…

-AR

I know I’ve written this phrase a few times in the past, but rarely is it so true: Phil Anselmo needs no introduction. You know who he is. You wanna read this interview. Period.

I will give you a little taste of the topics Mr. Anselmo and myself recently discussed via phone: his label, Housecore Records, and his upcoming autobiography, which will be co-authored by MetalSucks’ own Corey Mitchell. I did not utter the words “Pantera”or “Dimebag” even once, even after Phil did, because, well, what’s the point? The guy gets asked about Pantera literally all the time. It’s not like I was gonna be the interview where he suddenly slipped-up and revealed some new piece of information.

Luckily for you guys, Anselmo still has a lot to say even when he’s not talking about one of the most famous metal bands of ever. And so without any further bullshit…

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I’ve indulged in enough posts about the crazy and random shit we did on the road, so now it’s time for what we were all traveling for in the first place: SXSW. The magnitude of SXSW is inconceivable to anyone who’s never been; every orifice of downtown Austin is literally oozing live music. As MS commenter Joel Bailey said yesterday, “Half the shows at SXSW are in the store room of some coffee house or the smoking patio at an Ihop.” While this is true it’s not for lack of real music venues — in fact, the venues in Austin are all top-notch and blow NYC’s rooms out of the water — but there’s just so much going on that even smaller places that normally have nothing to do with music want to get in on the action. For a glimpse of what the scene looks like, check out Metal Injection’s SXSW wrap-up video.

Kip and I decided months back that this year we’d splurge on a hotel room Downtown. Trying to crash with local friends in years past was economical but a pain in the ass; getting a cab at 2am at SXSW is nearly impossible, and hiking a mile or two just to get home (and not having the option of a mid-day stop-in, or even better a clean place to take a shit!) can be really tiring, or worse, result in injury (just ask Kip). Though the option of staying on the SlayRV for the duration of SXSW later presented itself, we opted for the space and comfort of the Omni Hotel and it ended up being well worth it.

After settling into our room we headed over to the Mohawk to get set up for the Prosthetic Records showcase we were sponsoring. With a killer lineup of Prosthetic bands playing inside and the Action PR showcase going on outside (feat. High on Fire, Priestess, NAAM and others) — all in the same venue for one price of admission — the night was off to a great start before it even began.

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Oh, yeah. And you think that’s scary? Try this:

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