I was just thinking literally 20 minutes ago, “Sure would be nice to have another thoughtful Eyal blog to read.” No joke. And here it is!

On the subject though, I’ve had a few friends that did a few things, but no close friends ever fall into addiction that hard that it became life threatening. I’m not sure how psychology acts in that way, though I can imagine when it beings to take hold, the sane part that wants to say no is still there, but it’s powerless over the craving for the next fix. The next fix takes all control, all precedence, and nothing else in the whole world matters.

I’m not sure that I agree with your exact perspective on the “finding God” thing. I think a lot of that stems from rehab programs in that while they may or may not tout God as the higher power, they work on a basis of that the individual alone is not strong enough to save itself. (There are exceptions to the rule.) I have strong beliefs though I won’t get all evangelistic on you now. This is more metaphoric in that it parallels the central tenets of many religious ideologies that sum up “the human condition” as in need of being saved from itself. I think it’s unfortunate though that many people latch onto it so tightly that they become wacky as a result of it. Maybe it’s a result of desperate fear from being swallowed back into the pit they emerged from? Maybe the addictive personality just finds another thing to fixate on, and even though they’ve “found God” it’s like you say, just another mental addiction.

I’ve never struggled with addiction myself so I can’t comment from personal experience. I’ve been fortunate enough to have the foresight to see where those roads end, and so it’s kept me from ever really dabbling in the first place, aside from a few joints in my youth.

Good blog, again.

I have told my story before on a post about Layne Staley that Axl did if you wanna check it out. Anyway, I was deep into a heroin addiction a couple of years back that was attributed to many things, but one of the big ones was that I was living the rock star life. My eldest brother had just passed away and I needed to kill my pain in order to have a good time and perform, as I used to say, “to my liking” (which meant completely fucking loaded). I was a monster. Unprotected sex and using rainwater to slam shit was what went on at night, I’m so lucky that I didn’t come away with some kind of disease. While my band members were cleaning up, making tons of cash and living pretty well for a band on tour, I would be bumming cigarettes off people in the audience. I was a fucking trainwreck, a broke ass, junkie trainwreck. I finally made the conscious decision to stop. I didn’t go to the methadone clinic, that place just replaces your addiction with another addiction. I know dudes who were on brown for 2 years and methadone for 12. I repeat, STAY AWAY FROM METHADONE! LIQUID HANDCUFFS! Anyway, I went on lockdown. I realized what was important to me. I have a little brother who is autistic. If I died, who will be there to take care of him when my parents pass? How am I going to make something of myself being a junkie? I have always been the academic sort and I got great grades in community college (I know, it’s community college, but still). I enrolled at the University of Florida and got in. I left my music behind. It was sad, but entirely necessary. I didn’t turn to God, I’ve talked way too much shit to go in that direction. I have just immersed myself in my studies. I’m in the college of special education and hopefully I will be able to help people read and write and learn just like everyone else. I guess I just wanna say that being able to latch onto something comforts those people, just like we latched onto our drug of choice. They need something to fill the void and God is convenient because he can also be a crutch. It’s sad, but these people are going through tough times, so cut them a little slack.

“…I’ve thankfully never been addicted to anything. I don’t want to have to stop because I might die.”

Wow, dude. Your posts keep getting better each time. I’ve never had any kind of addiction problems, possibly because I think it takes way more effort than I would ever allow.

The only positive way I can think of to look at what you are talking about Eyal is from the perspective of what the ‘new’ support group gets out of it.

That is to say, yes, the person “as we knew them” is no more, but they now need help/support, and I hate to say it but the really crazy religious freaks who AREN’T recovering addicts, they basically devote themselves to their faith LIKE an addict, so their only concern/focus/purpose is to lead people to God (and validate their crazy delusions) and to support those who need help and want to get it that way. So it’s addicts feeding addicts. It’s still sad but at least someone’s getting something out of it.

It’s kind of like the debate about leaving someone who’s in a coma/in a vegetative state on life support, even though you know they may never get better.

I have never done drugs and never been drunk but I have seen the effects and the path that these people take via friends of mine, and I also want nothing to do with them, and basically I made the decision for myself that I would try sincerely once to help someone out and if they weren’t ready and turned me away, then I would just disconnect from them. I’ll help people if they want it and let me, but otherwise I will not be weighed down by these people. I have my own life and goals and my own shit to keep straight. I may not be addicted to drugs or God but I have my own void to fill.

Basically, I think in this case, based on the scenario you put forth, that it would actually be better for the person to die. They’re clearly suffering and to go on living as a zombie afterwards… well I’d put it in my will just like a DNR. Let them RIP don’t make them shuffle forward and rot alive for the rest of their existence.

Yes, I’m a coldly rational miserable fuck sometimes. But when it comes to the true sense of a life, you are either living as you, or you are for all intents and purposes, dead.

Disappointed. Your blog is usually much better than this.

Drugs are something that I learned to dislike at a young age. I have an uncle that has spent the majority of his life as an addict. I saw the shit that he went through at a young age. I remember finding him in my grandmothers bathroom passed out with a needle in his arm. When you are 8 years old, that tends to fuck with you. He went to jail, stole from my grandmother, stole from my mom, etc… Around the age of 40, he finally got clean. Did he turn to God? Maybe a little, but he didn’t become a fire and brimstone bible thumper. He has focused his life on helping other addicts get clean. He has become the head of the NA program in our city and works full time at a youth shelter.

I won’t lie. In high school I smoked weed. I never had the desire to do anything harder. If there was coke around, I simply left. I think that had more to do with my extreme fear of jail and the whole being at the wrong place at the wrong time thing. I disassociated myself from a lot of friends, because it became a trust issue. I saw my uncle rob everyone and I automatically associated that with behavior with drug users. Most of my weed smoking took place between the age of 12 and 15. After that I put all of my energy into music, soccer, school and my girlfriend (now my wife). I stayed friendly with my friends that got into drugs, but they all knew that it wasn’t my thing. One of my friends that was pretty much like me got jumped by about 20 people one night and he was never the same. He started slipping into addiction and doing shit that was way out of character for him. He got pretty bad, eventually turning to the needle. I would try to talk to him, but he wanted nothing to do with me at that point. Once college started, I did a bit of partying. Some smoking resumed and lots of drinking, but that lasted about my first year of school and I was done with it. The friend that I spoke of lost his brother to cancer, so I reached out to him. He was in bad shape and had hit bottom. The death of his brother really got to him. I remember telling my mom that he was going to die soon if he didn’t get help. I was going to make arrangements with my uncle to try and reach out to him, but unfortunately I never got the chance. He died just over a month after his brother. I really struggled with the fact that I never got to help him. His parents told me that he had conveyed to them that he was ready to get clean. This is something that has haunted me for years.

I can name about 10 people from high school that are dead from drugs and about 20 others that are in prison or still strung out.

I’m 35 now and really have no desire to be involved with anyone into drugs. I live in WV and see the horrors of meth and prescription drugs on a daily basis.

All of that being said, I don’t have issues with people who smoke weed. Do I do it? Haven’t in years. It just isn’t my thing, I’m just not into it.

Jesus, I didn’t mean to type that much, but oh well, there it is.

I’m already addicted to caffeine, and since it can cause a heart attack if abused I’m pretty much covered. No need to go into hard drugs.

Damn. Wrote a long post above and it is awaiting moderation.

Both of those extremes are very foolish. Everyone has a void inside them, and there are ways to fill that void that don’t involve drug addiction or religious fanaticism. In my opinion, the best method for filling the void is self-discipline, because it is the only permanent solution to it. Everything else, especially drinking/smoking weed/partying, can be very effective, but ultimately they come and go. They do an excellent job of filling that void, but the void always re-appears. Only with clear cognition and good self-discipline, can one keep the void filled. That doesn’t mean you should never indulge or have fun, but I think that a truly strong person can be happy and content with little or no self-indulgence. I’m not very religious, and I’m also totally sober, but I can honestly say that I feel happy and fulfilled in life, most of the time. I get everything I need through good relationships with friends, and music. Music also works as a great coping mechanism for me when the going gets tough.

Kyle: I have to respectfully say that I think that’s a pretty small-minded way of thinking about the world. I know it’s the cool thing in the young white American rock and roll perspective to bag on religious people, but you gotta remember: not everyone lives in the the car-driving, TV-watching, pot-smoking, blog-perusing, $1.50/pack tube sock-buying, backpacking-through-Europe-to-find-yourself, Jon Stewart and Peyton Manning, college education and internet porn, hot pockets and infomercials world (an admittedly sweet-sounding one).

There are an awful lot of people out there, like, you know, billions of them, who are both religious and also quite reasonable, sane, and respectable (and by the way, I’m not one of them; I strayed from the flock long ago). They’re not all flat-earthers, regressive social retards who are going to be phased out of the gene pool by the enlightened modern Westerners. Junkies choose to disconnect from the world. Religious people choose to be part of a community, so they can have support and friends and connections with the people who live in their area. For 90% of the world, religion is about community, not some magical being in the sky.

I know how you feel, there’s this friend I’ve known for about 16 years who always gets in trouble and has become a huge coke addict as of late. I’ve stopped hanging out with him because as much as I like smoking weed and drinking, this guy can’t seem to have fun out without drugs or alcohol, literally EVERY time I’m with him. One time I asked him if he wanted to see BTBAM, he said if there’s drugs and alcohol involved, I’ll go. A lot of times I’d hang out with him recently, he would always offer me gas money to go bring him to his dealer’s house to pick up blow. I’m glad I don’t do that stuff. This kid spends about $20-60 on coke when he does it, or ends up being in a lot of debt when he doesn’t have money. I think this guy is a prime reason, why people think weed is the gateway drug which is a bunch of bullshit. I’ve been smoking weed for about 4 years now and have been offered harder drugs left and right and not once have I felt the urge to try them. Also this kid doesn’t seem to learn from any of his mistakes. He’s been expelled from school twice. He’s been sent to three alternative schools and a placement center. He just got his license for his first time last July and got it suspended for 2 dui’s. For his last DUI, he was driving on inhalants and was so high to the point where he didn’t know he was driving and wrecked some person’s yard. After that he bitched and said why should I have to pay for ruining their yard. The guy is so selfish. I can’t believe I’ve been friends with this guy. I try helping him out, but there’s no way of getting through to him. Anytime I tell him that I don’t like what he’s doing, he’ll think I’m trying to be like his parents. He’s just one of those people that you mentioned that will either die, be in jail, or become a religious freak (doubt that one would happen).

I never had a friend die from a drug overdose, but I did have a friend that died from alcohol poisoning. I was very shocked because this kid did drink but he wasn’t an alcoholic or a person who would get wasted every time he drinks.

What makes no sense to me is that one of my friends that went with me to his wake, said he just made a mistake and it didn’t deter him from drinking, yet he would talk about how bad marijuana is. I was baffled at the time because my friend would drink underage and he got mad when he found out I smoked pot. I asked him why he hates marijuana so much and he said because he said he had two friends that smoked too much and ended up getting killed driving high while they t-boned by a semi. Now don’t get me wrong, that is bad but that is kinda taking it to extremes. While driving high isn’t as bad as drunk driving, you still shouldn’t do either. Not to mention that it’s obvious that there have been WAY more drunk driving accidents then stoned driving accidents.

I’d also like to point out that in the google ads section, there’s a bunch of rehab and treatment centers being advertised lol.

heh.. the guy in the second picture actually looks better after the 1 year of use..

Well, there isn’t much in the way of drugs I havn’t tried or used at some point.
This is to be expected from a musician. HEH.

Well not really, but yeah.

I know plenty of people that have cleaned up and live a pretty good life.

I also know some people that died or commited suicide from doing drugs, or just their overall lifestyle choices.

I hope there’s no one out there addicted to something that think this article
is saying they can never clean up if they so choose.

Being sober is a mental choice. Some of us find solace in replacing bad addictions
with good addictions, such as being health conscious, working out, running,
bicycling , going out doing things. That’s the most important part for conquering
bad addictions is making lifestyle changes. Find your priorities and go with them.

Substitute good things for bad things, personally.

You can do it.