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PAGING DR. DANZIG

  • Axl Rosenberg
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PAGING DR. DANZIG

Alright, so I’m not a doctor, and I fully acknowledge that the medical business is just as crooked as pretty much every other business in the world these days (I don’t even like metal, dude – I just couldn’t turn down the multi-million dollar contract the Sheinhardt Wig Company offered me to help run this site), but I do know that telling a cancer patient “Don’t bother with chemo” is probably not the wisest idea in the world. A few years ago my aunt had breast cancer, and I’m reasonably certain that if when the doctor told her “You need chemo” she had replied “You need to suck my muthafuckin’ dick, I’m going to see a nutritionist,” she’d be dead right now. Ditto a whole lotta other cancer patients I’ve known. Again, I’m no doctor. I suppose it’s possible that all they really needed was some zinc n’ shit. But this seems like one of these instances where, y’know, you should probably just shut the fuck up and do what the medical professional tells you.

Then again, I’m not Dr. Danzig, Medicine Goth. Check out this excerpt from a recent interview with Vice:


So you have nothing to share, nothing to impart to those of us who are rapidly turning into jiggly piles of goo? It seems like it happens quick.
Uh, do you work out at all?

Not every day.
You don’t need to do it every day. Diet is really important and I think vitamins are really important also. Maybe you want to go to a nutritionist and find out what your body is lacking and what it’s not lacking. And I don’t mean a fucking quack, chemo, murdering doctor. I mean a nutritionist, who evaluates your blood and tells you what you’re deficient in and what you’re not deficient in.

Those are all good things to know, but they’re no surprise. You don’t have any one thing that…
If I can help it, I don’t go to modern doctors.

How come?
They’re full of shit.

Across the board? All of Western medicine?
Pretty much. If you had cancer would you get chemo? You’d be dead in a week.

I wouldn’t be dead in a week!
Bet you. [laughs]

What would you bet me? Let’s make this interesting.
I wouldn’t bet you anything, because in a week, even if you live, you’re not going to live that much longer! Chemo radiation will kill you, and it’s not the way to heal your body from cancer. You need to make your body stronger. Your body has natural things that fight off diseases. Cancer is just cells deteriorating more rapidly than your body can heal and fight it. So you have to find out what that imbalance is. Doctors are too busy writing scrips that they get kickbacks on and charging you hundreds of thousands of dollars for chemo.

Alright, I’ll take that bet, Glenn! Let’s inject you with nut cancer and then you can not get chemo and we’ll see how it works out. You’re ready to put your money where your mouth is, right? Drop me a line, let’s do this. We can even get the Metal Injection dudes to document it all on video, and maybe Metal Insider can get Scion to sponsor it or something. “Watch Glenn Danzig Overcome Testicular Cancer by Sheer Will Power.” It’ll be swell!

-AR

[via Blabbermouth]

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