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...And Fuck You Too

THIS PROBABLY MADE FRED PHELPS VERY UPSET

 Wednesday, June 2nd, 2010 at 10:30am by

Remember how the incredibly nice people from the Westboro Asylum for the Criminally Insane Baptist Church were going to picket outside of Ronnie James Dio’s public memorial service this past Sunday? I have no idea how many people actually showed up for that protest (there’s no mention of it on WBC’s oh-so-charming website, and I can’t find the number in any news reports of the event), so in lieu of being responsible and not just publishing some random figure I made up, I’m going to do just that and assert that my original estimate of 75 whack-a-dos was accurate. This number is based on some photos of the protest that have been posted online – it really doesn’t look like that many people showed up. It also doesn’t look like those people were exactly on-point with their message.

(AP Photo/Jason Redmond)

Okay, Dio is going to Hell. I don’t agree with that statement, but I understand your point of view and why you’re here protesting at the man’s memorial service and -

Wait, what?

(Photo by k763 via Flickr)

What the fuck does Dio have to do with the Jews killing Jesus and oil and “Fag Marriage?” I don’t remember him ever taking a public stance on gay marriage. Or oil. Or Jews. So, like, do you just go around to random memorial services shouting about things that make you mad? “DIO IS GONNA BURN! ALSO, POPCORN AT THE MOVIES IS NOT REASONABLY PRICED!!!“I mean, come ON. You’re totally undermining your own message. Now you just look like a bunch of crazy people!

Meanwhile, a few anti-anti-Dios made some signs of their own, which were considerably more amusing:

(AP Photo/Jason Redmond)

(Photo by k763 via Flickr)

And if that wasn’t enough to get Fred Phelps all riled up, Blabbermouth says that more than 1,200 Dio fans showed up to mourn, including these really cute girls, the pleasures of whom the congregants of the Westboro Baptist Church can never know, lest they join Dio in Hell:

And then Eddie Trunk got up and read an official declaration from a Los Angeles City Councilman, announcing May 30 as Ronnie James Dio Day:

Soooo… yeah. Another rousing success for the Westboro Baptist Church!

-AR

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  • malwar

    polka dots in first pic, marry me, we will throw firebombs into the westboro church then motorboat all nite long

    • Double D

      Motorboating doesn’t scratch the surface of what I’d do to polka dots. Goddamn, she is fine! I bet she was some sweet hips under that dress.

      • Romaould the Loquacious

        Hahaha! I see I’m not the only one whom was thinking thoughts along those lines. Too bad she’s possibly crazy… :O

        • Awful Offal Carnage

          The crazy girls are the best kind to get in bed. It’s like, the crazier they are the better.

        • Dodgy

          Judging by the signs she’s holding, I’d be willing to bet polka dots was one of the sanest people out there. Props to the metal brethren for mocking the WBC.

  • Joe LaForm

    God I hate those fucking people. Bunch of retards. They have absolutely no respect for anyone. They hate gays so much they picket our heroes- the military dead and Dio. Bunch of right-wing crazies. I hope the people in LA blasted some Dio,Sabbath,Rainbow and so on and so forth so the Christian crazies could enjoy Dio’s work. Maybe they’ll enjoy the military’s as well one day. Stupid conservatives.

    • deeds

      oh so it’s those right-wing crazy conservatives? not liberals? or neither? ok. keep spouting your hate on something you don’t understand.

      • Dave

        So what is there to understand? Bat-shit insane is bat-shit insane. Pretty easy to grasp.

      • Isaac

        WBC consists entirely of right-wing crazy conservatives, dumbass. It’s fucking less than 100 people. Christ.

        • vagoo

          who is this “Christ” you refer to?

      • kmfcm

        I love how even conservative scum don’t want to claim them.

        “Nuh-uh, don’t lump me in with those crazies!”

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Livingston/25310975 Robert Livingston

          You’re an idiot.

          It’s just like liberals don’t want to be lumped in with Communists or Socialists. Different degrees of insanity.

          So yeah, Conservatives and these nut jobs aren’t in the same league.

          • Jake Jones

            GHAT DAMN COMMUNISTS RUINING MY COUNRTY WITH THEIR LIBERAL DECEIT!

        • DemonicLemming

          Funny how the mindless liberals embrace the pinko commie greenies – except the ones who do things like set Hummer dealerships on fire “in protest”. They do claim the ACLU though, so I guess that makes up for it.

    • DemonicLemming

      These people are just fucking insane, not conservative nor right-wing. They defy all definitions except “fucking insane”.

      • Charles

        WBC love grandstanding.

  • |Tch0rT|
    • bassxface

      Haha that’s GREAT.

  • Fufkin

    I think those people get far too much publicity – which seems to be the thing they crave. As Wendy Dio said, turn the other cheek. They’re not even worthy of a reaction. Ronnie wouldn’t have given them the time of day.

    • http://heavystreet.com Sat

      Well said Fufkin. These ass clowns need to be ignored…like the next Killswitch Engage record.

      • NPC

        And the previous two.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jason-John-Crispen/100000169530540 Jason John Crispen

    way to desecrate the american flag shitheads. god tell you to do that too?

    • Alex_P

      Yeah. They actually do hate America.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jason-John-Crispen/100000169530540 Jason John Crispen

        yeah, we should send them on an all expenses paid vacation to someplace over in the gaza strip. they’ll have alot in common with them. what a bunch of dicks. this is what generations of inbreeding will do to your congregation.

        • Random

          IF YOU DON’T LIKE AMERICA THEN YOU CAN GEEEEET OUT.

  • bearbomb

    Movie theater popcorn is pretty ridiculous now that you mention it. The bags cost theaters more than the kernels themselves!! Where’s my picket sign? I’m going to the movies.

  • Gaia

    And damnit, why is ink for the printer so expensive! That’s what I want to know!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jay-See/726690352 Jay See

      I second this.

      • Wilson

        Im with you guys.

  • WowWee!

    Those people have way too much free time on their hands, they should all just kill them self so they can all be with their God already and stop bitching about everything like little babies.

    I salute all the people who had signs next to these retards.

    • Dwarfskeet

      Suicide is a sin. Can’t do that, or they’d be in Hell with Ronnie James Dio. Who would in turn, kick all their asses.

      • MetalRam

        I think suicides go to purgatory so they dont even get to jam with Dio, bunch of moronic fucktards.

  • Eduardo Navarro

    Ok i am a christian, i believe in god, and i listen to FUCKING METAL. I LOVE DIO. Don’t take it on the church in general! Those retards are EXTREMISTS, just like muslim terrorists in their own special way. Fucking retards have no respect for people.

    • Chris

      I agree man. Their hatred of others is a huge contradiction to Christ’s teachings and it bothers me because it gives all Christians a bad reputation. Rest in peace, Dio, and may God bless you…

      • PD

        Agreed. I am Catholic but HATE people who accept teaching for the absolute truth. God gave us free will for a reason. I’m convinced religion’s sole purpose is to instill a strong set of morals. Period. And yes, I also do think God exists, just not in the form we all were taught. Extremists always go and ruin a good thing. Crusades anyone?

        • Trux

          Crusades??… count me IN…

          and yes… I am a Catholic too !!

    • kmfcm

      If you x-tians don’t want to be judged by the actions of the funhaters that make you look bad DO SOMETHING ABOUT THEM, because newsflash YOU LOOK BAD.
      Extremist or not, Mr. Phelps is ONE OF YOURS

      • heavymetalking

        word

      • Genaro

        I am a Catholic too, but I believe you are wrong there. We SHOULD NOT do anything about this. Rather, Catholics should be better themselves.
        Let me put it this way: Suffocation doesn’t go and beat up the guys in The Devil Wears Prada. Sure, they probably can, but they don’t because they are intelligent people and know that that’s not the way to act. Rather, they kick-ass every show so that more people become fan of them and forget the other bunch of retards.
        Also, I will point out that Fred Phelps is not Catholic anyway, the last article said he has a website that says something along the lines of “Priests rape children” (which is also a load of bullshit, but that’s for another occasion.)

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Robert-Livingston/25310975 Robert Livingston

        Once again, you’re an idiot. He is not one of us.

        And what would you expect anyone to do about them, just out of curiosity?

      • Monkey Knife Fight

        KMFCM: While I am a passionate atheist and typically will do little to defend christians or the bible, I think you’ve got it wrong here. Mr Phelps is not one of theirs. He is so fucking nuts that extreme conservative christians openly disown him and his ilk.
        Saying he is of theirs is like saying me and dolphins are the same, because we have both been in the ocean at least once.

  • Shinaain

    Me being me, I zeroed in on the American flag in the gutter in the first picture and wonder if those are their values, as well. I’d rather they just burned it and had done with it – it’s what you’re supposed to do if you let it touch the ground, anyway. The rest of it is truly too ludicrous to be believed.

    As of this moment, my new policy towards these people is the same as everyone else back home has for the Klan when they decide to surface and make fools of themselves for publicity’s sake: ignore the hell out of them. It seems best, as hate-mongering, hypocritical cretins are truly not THAT entertaining.

  • devoured by vegans

    I hate modern toss, but anyone seen mr tourettes these fuckwits signs always remind me of it.

    http://27.media.tumblr.com/HP9kjxCUnpg9da2n6w7ZaoONo1_500.gif

    So long Dio you unlike them will be missed.

  • Kuranes

    I was really hoping some metal dudes with nothing to lose might put the smackdown on those assholes. My brother was there, and got in to the service. Lucky bugger.

  • Beauzaque

    Read some stuff from people that were there on Ronnie’s FB page. Apparently only a handful of protesters showed up, but were denied entrance to the memorial grounds. They then took off before the service even started. Pretty pathetic really.

    Also had a good laugh at this:

    http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs353.snc3/29281_681428594721_25013594_38443373_338757_n.jpg

  • Jewers

    http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2035134&id=1122198839&l=12f9bcd8b9
    my friends and I, at a counter protest. We kept blocking them off, they seriously send about five people, so we just made a massive sign and moved wherever they did. Some dudes kept putting out cigarettes on them it was great. Everyone honked.

  • Pyroninja42

    They need to hold a wall of death to honor dio.
    Those westboro folks “accidently” in the middle.

  • steverazor

    If you believe in god (lower case g) then you are intellectually inferior. Case Closed. R.I.P. Dio – we love you.

    • DemonicLemming

      Well, there just had to be one dumbass here…

    • Jonathan

      WBC =/= Christianity.

      WBC = Something more diabolical and disturbing than the most obscure bits of satanism and the occult.

      Idiot.

  • DemonicLemming

    I like to use one of those over-said lines about the WBC, because it’s the only thing I can think of that fits: Kill it with fire, then nuke it from orbit – it’s the only way to be sure.

    Also, chick on the left in the Motorhead shirt = nice.

  • LilalCFH

    Love how dude in the first pic is dragging his American flag on the sidewalk. Real patriotic, buddy.

  • ferris

    Way to let the flag drag in the gutter. Guy’s obviously a godless commie. I wonder if he’s undercover Taliban.

  • Powerglove guy

    The members of the Westbro Baptist Church will be very surprised when they meet their maker. When their souls reach the point of divine judgment, a monkey that farts lollipops, or whatever happens when you die. They will look Dio in the face, and he will be at peace. While the Westbro Baptist Church will be tortured for all eternity by a gay Satan. And people think the followers of Chirst can do no wrong, well they are full of shit.

    • Chris

      It’s been proven time and again that so-called “followers of Christ” have done horrific things in the past and WBC is no exception. However, I don’t consider committing acts of hatred to be following Christ whatsoever, nor do I as a Christian want anything to do with anyone who tries to justify hate in the name of God. I think it’s also to important to note that many “true Christ-followers” have done very good things throughout history. Don’t go blaming Christianity every time some wacko group that claims to be Christian does something like this. Do your research and see what Jesus’ teachings actually are and if you feel it is in line with what groups like WBC are doing, then by all means, blame it on Christianity. These wackos believe what they want to believe and twist scripture to support their causes. The Jesus I believe has nothing in common with the views WBC represents.

  • http://crescentshield.com Crescent Shield

    I was there and there were more anti-Westboro people holding signs than anti-Dio. All the signs were really funny except the one that said “DIO Rules”, that one was just true.

  • Dean

    Never been a Dio fan. I hated his songs with three-fourths of Black Sabbath like I hate Warrant, Poison, et al. But to say that he was deserving of a great deal more respect than this is redundant to the same degree as saying that the Westboro people are morons.

    Have the WBC people never heard the part of the Babble that reads something like “do unto others as you would like them to do unto you”? What if we showed up to the funeral of one of their sons or daughters, or parents, wielding signs praising the fact that there is one less gene-pool-polluting moron in the world now? Or signs protesting that evangelicals are allowed to marry (or that marriage exists at all for that matter)? Most people regard the ability to look at a situation as if they were another person experiencing it as a minimum requirement for being allowed to call yourself an adult.

    As much as I find the claims of Dio’s influence or contribution to be tenuous, I do believe he is worthy of commendation for helping to show these retards as the rejects that they truly are. And for helping remind some of us that if these are the kinds of people who are admitted to “heaven”, then I do not want a bar of it.

    Rock on, Ronnie James Dio.

  • http://www.noisecreep.com Jay

    I think I’ve mentioned this before on here…but Phelps is no moron and this has little to do with actual religion. He makes money suing municipalities that don’t grant him permits to protest, and through suing individuals that attack them. His church has made millions of dollars doing this.

  • http://www.blasterpiecetheater.com Carlo Dela Cruz

    You have lost The Game.

    • Greg

      Well shit.

  • Jonathan

    I’m seriously surprised the government hasn’t intervened for the hate speech and fighting words these crazy idiots are constantly spouting. I mean, it’s… I took a law class. Technically, these people can be arrested, and it would NOT be infringing on free speech because their messages are so offensive and violent.
    I’m pretty sure these people have gone out of their way to offend every single person who is not a part of their cult.
    So, what charges could be pressed?
    -hate speech
    -fighting words
    -public disturbance

    …and I’m sure some policeman will come up with extra charges with- for once- a good reason.

    • DemonicLemming

      Probably not public disturbance, if they have the permit to protest – and as well-funded as the group is, I doubt their lawyers let them out much without those.

      Hate speech really isn’t a crime – it’s the same reason groups like the KKK and the Black Panthers are still allowed to have rallies and give speeches. Aside from threatening someone’s life (ignoring slander/libel), you can’t go to jail for saying something, except in a few rare cases where it could conceivably be a threat against the government. Likewise, “fighting words” really doesn’t count, either, as far as I followed my polisci and law classes in college.

      There have been a few court cases against the WBC, one recently where I believe it was the city or town trying to place a distance requirement on any group protesting at a private function, like a funeral. Unfortunately, the case was dismissed and the WBC basically won that round, although I think it was being kicked up to the next court for appeals.

      The problem with legally trying to challenge the WBC is that you’re on the razor’s edge of restricting free speech, although the (very strong, in this case) argument can be made that the protests and speeches are maliciously and harmfully aimed at a specific person, or specific group of people (like the people attending a military funeral). The best way to beat the WBC is to use their own tactics against them – whenever a member of their group dies, have huge protests at their funerals. Find out who is funding them and run full-page ads telling everyone what those people are financially supporting – I may be wrong, but I don’t think donations to groups are covered by any sort of privacy law.

      Groups like these have to be ground into the dirt like diseased rats under a boot heel to be utterly annihilated. The best way to do that is to use their tactics against them – and there’s a lot more of us than them, meaning they wouldn’t have a chance at winning.

  • Genaro

    Since when do comments here have to “wait for moderation” what the fuck.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jordan-Whetson/100000749949672 Jordan Whetson

    see this is the reason so many people have a problem with Christianity. these people would rather preach off of fear instead of love. wow i really want to be like those people! not really these assholes give Christianity a pretty bad name it’s not about fear and hate its about compassion love and understanding

  • AMA

    I can’t help but notice that the WBC seem to have an obesity pre-requisite… Still how much exercise can one get, sitting on the floor all day, making ridiculous and obscene picket signs…

  • pigchop

    from an FAQ page at http://www.jewskilledjesus.com/faq.html

    “Q: Didn’t Christ forgive the Jews in Luke 23:34, which he said “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do”?

    A: Christ knew that in the last days when it drew time for the restitution of all things, that the completion of God’s dealings with the Jews would come to pass. He knew the words that promised that a spirit of supplication would be poured out on the righteous Jews – good figs vs. naughty figs of Jeremiah 24 – and that they would look upon him whom they pierced and mourn (Zechariah 12:10; John 19:7).

    He knew they would repent for that awful sin committed by the Jews, at which time they put that sin on the heads of all their descendents (Matthew 27:25) – that is, all of today’s Jews. He knew there would be 144,000 righteous Jews as described in Revelation 7, who would be sanctified and sealed. Those same righteous Jews are described in Ezekiel 9, being sealed TO BE PROTECTED FROM the final destruction.

    Knowing all these things the Lord Jesus Christ left the lost sheep of Israel – those who would hear and obey; those who would mourn and repent – some words of hope, saying, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do,” Luke 23:34.

    You’re ten kinds of a blaspheming bastard pretending those words apply to the stiff-necked, hard-hearted, rebellious, contentious, Christ-rejecting, filthy, unrighteous, reprobate Jews. Stop lying on God! Those words pertain ONLY to the penitent and obedient.”

    Of the many interpretations of the bible, I don’t believe I’ve come across any so firmly rooted in a blanket of hatred. After reading some of the wbc’s interpretations, it becomes very obvious that they are not interested in what the bible says, but only what they want it to say. It’s like looking at the sun and claiming it is the moon.

    • Chris

      There are two ways to read the Bible, but really only one right way to read it…

      Exegesis: an attempt to discover the meaning of the text objectively, starting with the text and moving out from there.

      Eisegesis: to import a subjective, preconceived meaning into the text.

      Exegesis is the correct way, but WBC clearly practices Eisegesis in order to twist the scripture to back up their own preconceived viewpoints. People can usually support pretty much any idea they have by misinterpreting scripture in just the right way…

  • pigchop

    And of course we have the group standing tall as completely delusional as they picture themselves becoming world leaders:

    “Q: Could you please explain to me the difference between your establishment’s point of view of Jews and that of Hitler’s army in WWII?

    A: Hitler was a blood-thirsty brute who was created by God and was his servant to punish the rebellious apostate Jews. The most important thing about him was that he was sent to set the world stage to where it is today, so doomed-america could be destroyed, and the battle could be pitched in Israel. The indignation of the King of Glory, that God called Jealous, is about to begin.

    Meanwhile, we at the WBC are standing by to help, teach, instruct, and give the seal of authenticity to our beloved Jewish brethren. We will testify to these coming events to the whole world until the good figs come out. They will come from all parts of the world. They will come to Jerusalem. We will join them there in praise and thanksgiving.

    In short, the difference is that Adolf Hitler hated and scattered the Jews throughout the world; and we love the good figs and will gather them from every corner, by the strength, mercy, and glory of God.”

  • Jessie Pendergrass

    Uhhh… what’s up with that one patriot and the flag touching the ground? Isn’t that what you’re NOT supposed to do? Sigh… Ok, back to staring at polka dots.

  • Howie

    Herpty derp! That guy’s flag is touching the ground! I somehow do not understand that the WBC HATE AMERICA even though they say it ALL THE FUCKING TIME.