I usually get kinda depressed around Labor Day weekend, ’cause it means that summer is pretty much over, and soon it will be colder than a witch’s tit again. But the dudes in Cephalic Carnage have pretty much guaranteed that this summer is gonna end with a bang — Relapse has announced an August 31 release date for Cephalic’s first album in more than three years, Misled by Certainty. Check out the metal-as-a-motherfucker cover art:

Presumably, the band will start debuting new material live when they start the MetalSucks co-sponsored Summer Slaughter tour, which begins in less than three weeks! Get dates here.

Meanwhile, Murderdolls have also released the cover art for their album, Women and Children Last, which comes out the very same day on Roadrunner:

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Ever wonder where that sick band Torche came from?

At the heart of that crunchy uptempo feel-good Florida trio (once-quartet) is a man by the name of Steve Brooks on guitar and vocals, who also had a hand in creating another energetic & anthemic Florida stoner doom relic by the name of Floor.

Floor went through several lineup changes through its on again-off again tempestuous run from 1992 to 2004, but the constant of Brooks kept the sound grounded (mostly) in a pretty distinguishable style that puts the vigorously vibrant energy of each song in the foreground and drops hooks aplenty.

And yes, in case you’re wondering, Floor got a hell of a lot sludgier and heavier than Torche typically does.

The band has reunited for a few shows in support of their recently-released massively-sized box set, pictured below (ten 12″ LPs, one 7″ EP, 8 CDs, 32-page booklet…..take that, LoG!) called Below and Beyond, which you can order right here.

They played Chicago last Tuesday and Philly last night (sorry for the late notice!), and are going to rock the fuck out of Brooklyn tonight at Club Europa…

Visit Floor on OurSpace

-KW

I had completely forgotten about Vince’s love of Bob Ross until his post yesterday. It would have been awesome if Bob had done an all-metal edition of his show, in which he discussed the joy of Ed Repka and Paul Romano. Learning about your craft is so metal! Thanks for reminding me, Vince, about what an inspiration Bob should be to us all.

Here’s some other things we did this week:

• We spoke to Anthrax’s Joey Belladonna, the legendary Wino, Harvey Milk’s Creston Spiers, and Cruel Hand’s Chris Linkovich.
• Vince, Axl and Gary discussed their favorite albums of 2010 so far.
• We’re giving away a free mp3 of Fistula’s “Ohio Death Toll Rising.”
• We checked out new releases by Kvereltak, Misery Index, Watain, and Parkway Drive.
• Anso reviewed the Big Four Live from Sofia, Bulgaria movie theater satellite thingy.
• Vince did a really a good job of impersonating Axl.
• Vince also discovered two new Sumeriancore bands that stink, and one that doesn’t.
• He also wondered: What is it with drummers wearing basketball jerseys?
• Guess what Serj Tankian thinks borders are?
• DEVIN TOWNSEND HEADLINE TOUR! DEVIN TOWNSEND HEADLINE TOUR!!!

A week from today, Vince and I see Faith No More in Brooklyn. So expect lots and lot of pointless pondering about FNM next week, ’cause that’s pretty much all I’m gonna be able to think about.

-AR

Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

First of all, we’d like to congratulate MetalSucks Maniac Cysquatch for winning our “Design a Graphic for Question of the Week” contest. There were a lot of entries that we thought were really cool, and we wanna thank everyone for all their hard work. Alas, there can be only one winner, and Cysquatch’s simple, elegant, Tool-like design was ultimately the one that stole our hearts. Cysquatch gets a free MetalSucks t-shirt in the size and style of his choice, and a weekly credit for his work. Congrats, Cysquatch!

Now, onto the business at hand: This week’s QOTW. Here it is:

Is this Big Four mini-tour awesome, or just sad? Please give special attention to the “Am I Evil” jam.

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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….especially when the kit is made of ICE.

Okay so the actual drumming in this video is nothing in the least to write home about — but I for one have never seen a drumset made out of ice getting smashed to bits, and that alone is worth a quick peepsky…..right?

Curious how an ice drumset gets made in the first place? Follow me past the mudderfookin JUMP and let’s have a look…

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Or, as Kip would say, “The Drums Are Cool, especially when you’re Sebastian Lanser of Panzerballet.”

Digby, how can you constantly rep re-thrash with a straight face when there’s great shit out there like this that pushes the limits of music? If you’re talking the ability to sell a product, well then of course stuff like Evile and Bonded by Blood stands a much better shot at commercial success than this jazz-metal wankery… but if sellability is what you’re talking about, well then just come straight out and say it instead of arguing that Enforcer “pushes the metallica envelope.” I mean, come ON!

-VN

Thanks: YildunDave

So says MetalSucks Maniac Lewis Walmsley, who categorizes the band as “Sludge/doom/post-pussy/grim/hardcore/belgian” and asserts that “You’s need to listen to Amenra.” Okay, Lewis, you’re on. Let’s give ‘em a listen.

Yeah, Lewis, you’re right! These dudes are pretty cool. Kinda reminds me of Buried Inside, which is a good thing — especially since Buried Inside are breaking up. There’s some cool stuff on the band’s MySpace page, too. So, three cheers for Lewis for suggesting an excellent band. I hope to use it as the fuck soundtrack to the best orgasm of my life real soon.

-AR

The original slogan for MetalSucks back when we first started was “Smart About Metal,” which was a play on Film Comment’s “Smart About Movies.” We got rid of that when we realized that sometimes it’s fun to act a like a dumb ass, but, still, we’d like to think that we’re doing something to fight the stereotype of metalheads — namely, that we’re all idiots who drink too much and get into fights and destroy property and engage in all manners of hooliganism.

Unfortunately, a lot of metalheads ARE complete fucking morons who seem to go out of their way to confirm the worst suspicions of the non-metal community. Like some Batavia, Illinois theatergoers at the recent Big Four satellite movie thingy, who got so outta hand that the cops had to show up and shut the screening down:

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A company recently approached us with the idea of creating a mobile list that would allow us to send SMS (text message) updates to any of our readers who sign up. We wouldn’t send out updates every time we post a new article (’cause that would be ridiculous), but only when there’s something new or exclusive like an interview or track premiere.

Discussing it internally, we really have no idea whether this is a service you guys would be interested in or not. It could be a great way to keep readers apprised if important updates, but it could also feel like spam (keeping in mind, of course, that’d you’d have to sign up).

So, rather than speculate, we figured we’d just ask you guys. Whaddayathink? As always, vote in the poll widget below, then elaborate in the comments.

n

There’s been some backlash in our comments sections with regards to Nachtmystium’s live show. And though it pains me to say it because I love this band to death — Assassins was near the top of my “best of” 2008 list and Addicts will no doubt be near the top of my list for 2010 — it’s kind of warranted.

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I could’ve sworn I saw posters online claiming that Godflesh’s reunion gig at France’s Hellfest last week would be their only European show for the summer, or maybe even just their only show for the year, but now I can’t find those posters and the band has already announced a second show, at this October’s Supersonic Festival in Birmingham.

Not that I’m complaining. I’d love for this to turn into a full-blown reunion, complete with, oh, I dunno, maybe some gigs here in the States? Justin? Benny? Whadda ya say? We’ll show you a good time, I promise!

While we wait with baited breath, here’s footage of “Crush My Soul” from Hellfest. Band still sounds good to me!

-AR

[via Blabbermouth]

OHMYGODJUGGALOSPLEASESTOPMAKINGITSOHARDNOTTOLAUGH!!!!!!!!!!

I guess I should just accept that I’m never going to stop making fun of Juggalos. Because they keep doing such incredibly stupid shit. Their latest folley? Giving sex and relationship to Nerve.

Let me repeat that: Juggalos are giving advice on sex and relationships. That’s like asking Adolf Hitler for advice on getting along with other cultures.

Here are some choice samples:

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I feel like I’ve seen more BTBAM interviews on Metal Injection than for any other band, save perhaps The Red Chord. After so many interviews, what is there even to talk about anymore? Rob’s a funny guy and all, but after a while I cant imagine that it doesn’t get to be like “THESE assholes, again?”

I guess our Dine-bro-saurs at Metal Injection felt the same way, ’cause they sent Johnny Orlando Jr. to The New England Metal and Hardcore Festival this year in their stead. Orlando Jr. hit Between the Buried and Me with some hard-hitting questions; it’s a wonder BTBAM made it through this thing alive.

-VN

When we were kids, getting a free sampler CD along with a magazine or as a promo item in a record store was the coolest thing. The coolest fucking thing! 20 tracks of music for FREE, or for the price you were going to pay for your favorite magazine anyway. And though the Internet has all but done away with the need for CD samplers (and any would-be fan curious about a given band can stream a few tracks on MySpace within minutes), the idea of a free downloadable sampler is still pretty cool because you might find something cool that you’ve never heard before.

The folks at Metal Blade and Hydra Head know this all to well, as both labels are giving away free samplers online highlighting some of their very best artists.

Click to read more…

I appreciate Tina Guo’s skills as a musician, and far be it from me to criticize anyone in gold lamé tights, but this is just not my aesthetic. Note to dudes: Unless your band originated on the Sunset Strip in the 1980s, you are not allowed to use more hair products and make-up than Jennifer Batten would. It’s, like, a law, I think.

Speaking of Jennifer Batten — didn’t she already do a hard rock version of “Flight of the Bumble Bee” like a gajillion years ago?

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Our bro-bros over at Metal Injection have debuted the new Kreator video, “Destroy What Destroys You,” which you can check out below. I give it credit for being the video of an awesome Kreator song. And for debuting on Metal Injection. And, um… wow, it really looks like the people are moving and singing! The illusion of life on my screen is very impressive. And did I mention I like the song? Yeah. It’s a good song. Good song.

“Destroy What Destroys You” comes off of Kreator’s latest, Hordes of Chaos, which is out now on Steamhammer.

-AR

So Stereogum is streaming “Indians,” one of Mastodon’s contributions to the score the Megan Fox career killer, Jonah Hex. And I’ve listened to it three times now. And, uh… well. It sure does sound like Mastodon.

But not even, like, really good Mastodon. Maybe I’m just holding the band to a higher standard because, y’know, THEY’RE MOTHERFUCKING MASTODON, but I think that “Indians” gets repetitive and boring fast.

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Reunions are tricky to pull off. Fans have certain expectations and demand for them to be met if not exceeded. Reunited bands, in turn, face the serious danger of being turned into human jukeboxes to accommodate. Harvey Milk has managed to do the impossible with their return: become even more popular for their new work than their old! A Small Turn of Human Kindness, their latest album, may very well challenge both new fans and old with its grim, noirish story of a crumbling relationship and falling down life. Last month I got in touch with frontman Creston Spiers for an interview, in which we covered the new record, his outright disapproval of the release of their “lost” Bob Weston-produced album, and Green Day’s awful Broadway musical.

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Whew… you guys sure love coming up with funny captions for hilarious emo band photos. 346 of you entered last week’s photo caption contest, but only one of you was funny enough to win The Haunted’s Road Kill DVD. And that person is:

• Raoul Dukenstein: “Rainbows in the Dork is NOT a fitting tribute.”

We’ve got an extra special prize for you this week, folks. Surely by now you’ve heard of the many Hourglass compilations released by Lamb of God that chronicle their entire career; they’re available in all sorts of formats from USB to CD to Vinyl to all of the above with a guitar in a fucking Coffin Case! Epic does not begin to describe the awesomeness of these compilations. And we’ve got TWO sets of the following to give away:

• The Vinyl Box Set: All 6 Lamb of God studio albums for the first time on 180 gram vinyl in a linen-wrapped collector’s box.
• The 3 CD Anthology: 44 tracks on 3 CDs. Vol 1 and 2 join Vol 3 containing 18 rare or never heard before songs.
• A 4′x6′ Pure American Metal flag (available exclusively with the coffin case set)

Holy shit! All those three things together are worth around $150, and that’s not even including the cost of the flag… or shipping. So why are the great folks at Epic Records offering up TWO SETS of these colossal packages for MetalSucks readers? Because they really love you, that’s why! So give it your best shot by coming up with a caption to the below photo, and pray that you’re one of the lucky/funny two winners. Remember to include a real email address with your comment if you’re logged in through FB Connect.

Ohhh, the director’s name is actually Sean O’Connor? Oh well.

The video is still really cool, though – and it’s fan made, which makes it that much cooler. So even if the greatest Scotsman to ever live didn’t direct it, you should, y’know. Check it out. There are also photos from the shoot here.

“Endless Teeth” comes off of Genghis Tron’s Board Up the House, which was one of the very best albums of 2008. It’s available now on Relapse.

-AR