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...And Fuck You Too

HOW TO LOOK LIKE A HOT METAL CHICK

 Thursday, September 30th, 2010 at 11:00am by

Remember when Sergeant D. found that totally awesome instructional video called “How to Dress Sexy Scene & Be Hot!”? In case the title didn’t give it away, it featured some chick who is clearly going to make some poor guy insanely unhappy one day instructing ladies on how to, well. Y’know.

Now Noa Avior at Metal Injection has discovered a delightful de facto companion video, entitled “How to Look Like a Hot Metal Chick.” (I love the modesty of the young women making these videos.) And, in all fairness, the girl in the video is definitely cute, especially if you’ve ever dreamed of fucking a piece of plastic. Personally, I would definitely tap that, so long as she promised not to speak under any circumstances.

She’s wearing a Suffocation shirt and she says it’s important that “you know and like the band” whose logo adorns your attire. Do we think she really digs death metal, or do we think she just realized that her value in the metal world is like a gajillion times higher than her value in the mainstream world, given that metal is a total sausage fest and dudes will kill one another for anything with a hole and a pulse? (Actually the pulse is just, like, a bonus.) I’m not saying attractive women can’t appreciate Suffocation; I’m just saying that this girl has all the personality of a Barbie doll, so I wouldn’t be shocked if she were totally full of it.

Also, did you know that there’s no room for girls in metal who don’t have blonde or black hair? And that eyebrows are incredibly important? And holy shit doesn’t this crap go against everything metal is supposed to represent?!?!

My personal favorite part, though, is when she says she’s gonna teach her fellow women how to dress for when they’re “going to a metal concert-thing.” I LOVE metal concert-things! Why, I’m going to a metal concert-thing tonight! Do you think I’ll be able to meet anyone as smokin’ as this chick? I’d really like to bring her home to meet my mother, ’cause Ma hasn’t threatened to disown me this week.

I think that Noa is even more pissed about this nonsense than I am. Head over to Metal Injection to read her thoughts on the matter.

-AR

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  • http://www.schenkeltown.com SchenkelTown

    sebastian bach looks like a hot metal chick…. just sayin’

  • DemonicLemming

    Wait, no redheads belong in metal? Bull fucking shit.

    Simone Simons.

    /*

    • Jen

      No kidding!

      “Like blonde or brunette.” Damn, I’m just shit out of luck.

      This video should be called “How To Get A Dude In A Band To Invite You Backstage”. Girls that dress like this don’t know that no one takes them seriously.

      • Jen

        Side note: I’d love to see Grace Perry beat the dog shit out of this girl.

      • DemonicLemming

        Reminds me of scene chicks, nix the bubblegum pink and switch it for goth black. Both groups are wastrel mankers, but they do know how to market themselves to the specific demographic they’re after – hipsters for scene chicks, metalheads for goth scene chicks.

        Random side note, it pisses me off that scene chicks with a couple little tattoos call themselves suicide girls now.

        • Kye

          I actually dated an extremely hot redhead for about three years and she was more absorbed into metal culture than any girl I’ve ever me.

          Those were grand times.

          • fernando

            what the fuck happened?

          • Kye

            We couldn’t really make it work once high school ended, so we decided to call if quits and just be friends.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sean-Goff/66000282 Sean Goff

        I was seeing a girl a while back who wanted to come to one of my shows and asked what she should dress like. I gave her an old Pantera shirt and told her not to wear any loose jewelry…. done and done. Since when was metal about a look….(glam what?)?

        PS: I wish there were more redheads at our shows… they’re pretty much my kryptonite.

  • Dirtman73

    Sometimes, every once in a while, i just fucking hate women. This is one of those times.

    • SP420

      “nothing too high, cause you’re at a show…”

      Her lights need to be put out bad.

  • Leyla Ford

    Wow. I’ve been doing it wrong for so long. Thank you for showing me the light.

  • Fufkin

    They need one of these for men who listen to deathcore.

    • hyperkulturemia

      Or do one for “how to bone a metal chick”. It’d basically be an audition tape to start some shitty deathcore band.

  • Billy Chapman

    This video is actually pretty good with no sound.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jeffrey-Adam-Danyleyko/504705386 Jeffrey Adam Danyleyko

      1

      • Timothy

        Ha !

    • BTK666

      I’d finger bang the shit out of her

      • Vampira

        Thats so hot!

  • Albatross

    Apparently red hair isn’t good enough. brb to find a different genre. I’m so glad I saw this, wouldn’t want to stick around when obviously I’ll NEVER look like a hot metal chick. =|

  • Vlygar

    Yeah, this chick is quite annoying but then again, every girlfriend of a Metalhead has been dragged to a concert and has also been asked to dress appropriately. Of the maybe 10 women to have ever been to a Metal show, I’d say 8 of them only went because they had to and they had no idea what the fuck they were wearing. So, this video isn’t really far off, but, to go the opposite route yet again, if the dude asks his chick to dress up, he’s gonna know how she should dress. If headbangers spend an hour straightening their hair and styling their beards to look like they just ripped them off some 60-year old bum, then helping their woman dress for a show is no problem.

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/glittergina Gigi Si

    Noa’s conclusion on Metal Injection says it all:

    “I really hope to see this girl at the next show I go to. So that I can thank her. And then shove my hand down her throat, pull out her lung meat and asphyxiate her face in it. That would be another way for her to look metal and she wouldn’t need blush for it either.”

    All I can add to that is ME TOO!

  • HARRYDICKERSON

    The very fact that she spent time making this video says so much about her personality.
    Such as, she has nothing better to do than show off how hot she is(and I’ve seen better). A real chick of metal most likely wouldn’t act like this at all, so I really doubt she likes Suffocation.
    In short, she is a stupid attention-whore.

    Either that, or we have a successful troll on our hands, gentlemen.

    • Slaytanic

      Actually if you look at her youtube profile, it looks like she is a make up artist. she has about 100 videos about make up and how to do make up. So maybe she did this to give girls make up tips, that dont know what their doing yet.

      Way to jump to conclusions and talk shit, when you dont even know this person. Fucking Dumbass!

  • DirtyWarriorMan

    Newsflash: girls are into fashion. Girls who are into metal are also into (metal) fashion. Yeah, this video is pretty dumb, but you folks acting offended really need to get a life. Plus this chick is hot.

    • maaax

      Agree. Totally not surprised or offended by this video. I’d like to see a lot of people here attempt to make a “How to prepare for a metal show” video.

      “Uh… Well first I look through my fuckin my shirt pile and try to find the ones that don’t smell too much like puke or whatever. Then… uh… out of the shirts that pass that test, I pick one that has a band that compliments fuck the bands I’m going… uh… to see. Definitely do not wear your A7X shirt to the Burzum SHOW!!! MAJOR FASHION FAUX PAX. The shirt is really the most important piece of your… uh… look. So after that just pick whatever the fuck pants you can find and don’t forget your Converse shoes or black boots. As for your face, you ugly taint grinder, the more facial hair and more dirty your hair is the better. People will know you are truly a awesome fuck metal dude if it looks like you haven’t been to a bathroom in weeks.”

    • cougar party

      Seriously. Everyone needs to chill out. Chicks love fashion regardless of their “scene”. Yeah, she’s a ditz. So what? People are getting way too pissed off about a air-headed hot chick.

    • HARRYDICKERSON

      You do have a good point man. That is very true. However, I don’t think metal fashion requires some stupid-ass Youtube video. It doesn’t seem necessary and I don’t think this girl really cares if anyone follows her retarded guidelines or not(nor do I think anyone will follow it). She just wanted to show off her looks and get some attention.
      But I guess that’s what typical girls like and it’s nothing to rage over.

      I still doubt she really likes Suffocation, but they’re a legit fucking death metal band, so at least she knows that much.

      • maaax

        She has many many makeup tutorials and if you ever watched one you might know that makeup is really complicated shit. It’s like making a masterpiece on your own face. Just because you don’t need help with your makeup style doesn’t make this a stupid-ass video. She isn’t some random person making a video of how hot she is; she’s a makeup artist trying to help other people with their makeup artistry.

        Also, in the video comments she claims to like Dimmu Borgir.

        I just don’t see any reason to hate on her other than to put someone doing what they love down.

        • Jen

          The thing is that she actually KNOWS what she is doing in her makeup tutorial videos – and sounds less like an airhead. The video above really does her no justice, because she makes herself sound like an idiot. I don’t think anyone can argue that.

        • HARRYDICKERSON

          Luckily this video was about makeup. :|

  • Dark Jezter

    She’s annoying, and a poser, but I’d still hit it.

  • Genial Gentile

    I have no problem with this. More women at shows can only be a good thing, and if they want to slut it up a little then who am I to complain.

    • Slaughterhouse

      +1

      I personally find that look very hot so I would have to agree with the above statement

      • Mike Arose

        I think shes hot but, i now feel obligated to make the male version of this video

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mark-Gavin/1396340262 Mark Gavin

    I can’t believe I watched all of that and she never even got naked.

    • >_>

      1

  • Vlood

    At first, i wanted to fuck her hard. But then my mind slowly came back to me, i noticed she’s a short fatty chick, and i kinda calmed down.

    • DustintheWind

      Indeed…fatty fat fat…. But i do love that the first thing she does in the video is throw her hair back and stick her tits out….

  • redneckMetal

    I can’t stand chicks who say “like” every two seconds. She said it at least a dozen times in the first minute.

    • wordMCface

      bro, I cant remember the show, but it was on fox, we used to have a drinking game where every time a girl said like or to(too or tawoooo aka two) we would take a drink. BUSCH LIGHT STRICTLY!!! It was br00tal. 30 mins and every one was lightheaded and wasted.

      we tried it with that orange county show on MTV but that shit was LIKE halo legendary. In 5 mins you were LIKE ” FUCK THIS”

      • Shitz Nolte

        My crew used to have a similar game for the “Osbournes” when it first came out. Drink every time someone gets bleeped for swearing. Needless to say, it had similar results.

      • zombiemonkeytime

        Try a Metallica one; every time James Hetfield adds extra syllables to a word.

        • Shitz Nolte

          heheh, true! White Zombie’s good for that too. Every time he says “Yeah” or “Wow”.

          • Robbie

            So glad I’m not the only to have thought of that.

  • redneckMetal

    “Suffocation are like, the greatest band in like the world, they are really like brutal. I was like really pumped when I almost like went to one if their metal like shows.”

    Zero chance she has ever heard anything from Suffocation.

  • jamie

    for the record

    shes a dumb bitch but id rail her

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacob-Wanous/714617966 Jacob Wanous

    So judgmental…

    My girlfriend probably comes across as ditsy as that at times, dresses way more feminine, but still has damn good taste in Metal. She actually got ME into Mastodon.

    Anyways, it seems like you guys all think a girl has to act like an angry lesbian, have a man-voice, and have disgusting hygiene just to be a “tr00 metulhead”. Have fun with your transvestites.

    • Sophus

      It’s not about appearances, it’s about having a goddamn personality

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacob-Wanous/714617966 Jacob Wanous

        Sometimes it takes more than 3 minutes to nail down someone’s personality, especially for those that have personality.

        I’m not saying she has a great personality or anything, I’m just saying that calling her a poser and hating on her based on a 3-minute video seems a little harsh.

        • Justin

          i can’t say for anyone else, but i just think she’s being too much of an average shopaholic beauty-obsessed girl. that really detracts from the attractiveness of her being supposedly metal. i don’t understand all the hate though, because this is (regretfully) quite normal for a girl.

        • DemonicLemming

          Sure, that’s true – just not for this chick. You can nail down her personality (or what passes for personality these days) in about 30 seconds.

          Funny thing is, it if were a guy who knew absolutely shit about what he was talking about, it wouldn’t matter how exuberant he was about it, everyone would shit on the guy. Toss tits into the mix, and for some reason, rules are supposed to change.

    • Vlygar

      Only the most troo and brootuhl can fuck a dumpster looking transvestite. Are you saying you’re not brootuhl?

  • hmsc

    first of all, i’m pretty sure, she’s like, in her parent’s master bathroom shooting this before they come home, so for all those guys who would “hit that”, make sure you, like, check her id. i know, i know the boobs are misleading, (they’re ridiculous!), but you have to take into account all the hormones they put in those cows we eat.
    second of all, hot metal chicks like that, specifically the ones that glue zippers on the side of their pants (???) will never sleep with you, sweaty metal dude. if you’ve showered recently, and have great hair, you might get lucky with a hand job, but you’ll have to have the right tattoos and be equally as vapid.
    third, this is why girls who are actually into metal don’t always love going to shows. i know it’s hard for the cro-mags out there to believe but since i’m not a dude, i don’t dress like one and even though i don’t dress like a slut either it would be nice to be able to go to a show and not have every guy in the room assume i’m there to fuck someone in the band or because my boyfriend had to drag me there. so, thanks hot metal chick for making that easier for me. i look forward to noa making you wear your lung meat like a funny hat.

    • Vlygar

      Wait, so you willingly go to a show and not just to get the attention of men? All Metal shows are at small, dark venues full with lecherous perverts who are only there to let out the aggression that they’re not currently getting laid.

      • Xenochrist

        …or some just go to see their favorite bands play and enjoy the music? maybe?

        • Discipleofthewatch

          Yes, that’s why I go!

    • DemonicLemming

      You might be surprised what high-school age girls would fuck.

      If I walk into a Bed, Bath, & Beyond to buy a decent set of silverware by myself, every guy there with his wife is going to assume I’m gay (and most of the women will, too). Likewise, when a chick shows up at a metal show, most guys are going to assume they’re stuck there because their boyfriend demanded it, or because they think, since they have tits, band members will fuck them.

      Deal with it. Everyone else does.

      • hmsc

        in a way, i agree with you but i think you could of used a better analogy! being a guy and walking into bed, bath & beyond no one is going to look at you and think you’re gay unless at the entrance you clap your hands together, jump up and down and exclaim how excited you are about the new duvet you’re about to buy. being a girl and walking into a metal show i have to accept that there are possible consequences, and you’re right most of the time i just deal with it. although, i’m going to go out on a limb here, and assume that this is not something you have to deal with. if you’ve ever been targeted in a pit or had some asshole try to feel you up because you’re one of the handful of girls there, my apologies, we have more in common than i assumed. it’s just frustrating being singled out and having people assume that a) you’re not a fan because you’re a girl and b) you’re a slut just because you’re a girl. this girl posting metal dress-up tips is just not helping.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Alejandro-Aldana/683878171 Alejandro Aldana

    way to set women back.

  • chainsaweater

    IM NOT GONNA LIE, I LIKE HER

  • Matt S

    WOULD

  • makeral t. beardbucket

    I’m just gonna say it. IMHO, Miss Grim Kim Kelly is thee tr00 metal goddess. She could polish my black metal sword anytime!! ;P

  • Shinaain

    When I posted Noa’s editorial and the accompanying video to my profiles yesterday, the feedback I got was rather interesting. My dudes got free passes for missing the point, but still.

    Anyone who has read this site for a hot-minute has probably seen a few of my rants on this and related subjects. Judging from the “Why is everybody so pissed?” comments above, it would appear a few points bear repeating.

    Axl and Noa have it right. I would add that the biggest reason shit like the videos this individual is posting piss me off is because I already have to put up with WAAAAAYYY too much shit in order to participate in the male-dominated metal community WITHOUT the perception of women in metal as fuck-puppets being perpetuated. And that’s precisely what videos such as this DO. I don’t need this shit. Already, I turn up to extreme shows and get treated like I don’t belong there. At best, random dudes ask if I got dragged to the show by a boyfriend and oh-so-helpfully suggest the best spots to stand outside the pit and hold his jacket. At worst, I get targeted when the pit starts and get groped or frotteured. When I talk metal with people I’ve just met, they often assume that since I sound knowledgeable, I must be parroting some male acquaintance’s/boyfriend’s opinions. Don’t get me wrong: I’ve met those girls – the ones “in” metal for dick/attention/fashion/boyfriends/what-have-you. They do exist and they’re operating freely.

    And posting fuck-puppet videos on YouTube. You’re damn right I’m pissed.

    • DemonicLemming

      Wait, you’re a chick? Holy shit.

    • Genial Gentile

      Hooray for frottage references!
      As much as I appreciate your opinion, I guess I too am missing the point here too (hopefully you will extend me a free pass as well).
      Even if this girl is disingenuous, I don’t find the idea of a girls “dressing up” to go to a show any more ludicrous than a guy combing through their shirt collection to find the perfect band T to wear to the show. And judging by the shows I’ve been to…the latter happens much more frequently. I agree it seems ridiculous especially in a subculture that supposedly champions substance over style but that seems to be a pretty hollow sentiment when you see 500 kids in one place dressed practically identically in their “metal uniform.”

    • cougar party

      Shinaain, I always appreciate your opinion, but I think your a little off on this one. I sympathize with your plight of being treated like an outsider at extreme metal shows, but I think that has less to do with “scene chicks” and more to do with the lack of acceptance by the male contingent at these shows.

      I can guarantee you that none of those guys would believe this chick is more of a real fan than you. It’s just that she’s hot and dressed slutty so guys will be more tolerant of her. No, it’s not fair or right, but nothing really is in life. It’s just how the world works. That’s why you don’t see a lot of bitchy, ugly, chicks/dudes because a bad attitude won’t get you too far if you don’t have the looks to rely on.

      I think people who identify with metal culture often feel that somehow as a group metalheads are more open minded, diverse, and tolerant then the rest of society, but I don’t find that to be true. Just look at the the crowded next time your at the show. It’s gonna be all black t-shirts of the appropriate genre in accordance to the show they are attending, everyone will have generally the same opinion on music, politics, etc.

      Metalheads are just as conformist as the rest of society. They just conform to a “counter-culture” standard, but deviance from that image is not accepted; outsiders will be ostracized. Ever seen the kid who makes the mistake of wearing a polo shirt to a metal show? Gets treated a lot like the kid who wears a metal t-shirt to a country club.

    • g man

      I come home from work and have to look up words in the dictionary ? I wasted valuable drinking time… Frotteurism. Never heard it before , but will use the term on a daily basis as of now. If that girl pissed you off , you would of HATED the ’80′s.

      • Shinaain

        I did, thanks.

        Multi-tasking is the solution to your situation, my friend. \m/

    • Shinaain

      DemonicLemming: You’re not disappointed, are you?

      GenialGentile and cougar party: You’re both right and I absolutely appreciate your feedback any day, any time. I do maintain that while I realize people like this aren’t the root cause of the bullshit I’m occasionally subjected to, they’re also just not helping and I don’t appreciate that very much, either. In most things, my motto is “live and let live,” but this just really struck a nerve with me.

      You both hit on one of the more ludicrous aspects of metal culture – the “metal uniform,” in which we’re supposed to be champions for the “do what thou wilt” creed, only so long as we obey the established “dress code.” Interesting that this chick understands enough of metal culture to have had this strange idea that, to be a “hot metal chick” (such lofty aspirations, eh?), she has to conform in order to be different. Her preoccupation with such a pursuit reveals her disingenuity and serves to reinforce negative stereotypes of women in metal being of no use to the community beyond their sexual availability.

      “…I don’t find the idea of a girls ‘dressing up’ to go to a show any more ludicrous than a guy combing through their shirt collection to find the perfect band T to wear to the show.“

      Good point. The difference to me is INTENT: What is any given person trying to achieve with the care and attention they place in their wardrobe and grooming preparations for “being Metal?” I, too, occasionally put a lot of thought into what I wear on any given night I go to a show, only I happen to give the least consideration to the matter of whether or not I look “metal” enough. (Of course, I’m given to understand that’s just me, and that it’s entirely possible that could be part of the problem.) For example, I also put a lot of consideration into which band T-shirt I wear. I only wear the bands I love and think are truly worthy of entering every room before me – and as their band name is covering my tits, they surely will. I also keep in mind what that signals to other people, as it sometimes opens up dialogue. Think about it: We metalheads are fanatical about people only wearing shirts of the bands they know and love, mostly because wearing a shirt like that signals belonging, or even just a shared interest. Overall, the misappropriation of metal culture and music is like claiming street-cred when you live in Beverly Hills. It’s a bastardization of a culture that has deep meaning for a lot of people, as well as a misrepresentation of the individual claiming false inclusion. That’s not against the law, but I still don’t have to appreciate or respect fake people. Just as much as anyone else, I also like to look nice and am usually flattered when men tell me I do – so long as they’re respectful in the manner in which they express their appreciation.

      “No, it’s not fair or right, but nothing really is in life. It’s just how the world works.”

      True words. In this, as in many other things, I can recognize double standards and work around them to the best of my ability, but I don’t owe them respect or acceptance – nor am bound to lend them legitimacy or credibility. Metal? \m/

      I’m not a prude or a stickler, and I’m not saying anyone’s wrong for enjoying the attention of the opposite (same?) sex. I’m simply a strong proponent of “truth in advertising,” of integrity of intent, and of individuals not reinforcing existing male-chauvinistic attitudes towards women in a sub-culture already not particularly accepting of them. But I DO hope Genial and cougar both understand that I really DO agree with you both – only rightly or wrongly, this video and the sentiment behind it really does make me want to lock and load.

      • DemonicLemming

        No, just surprised – typically I’m pretty good at picking out male vs female responses, but I completely missed on yours. If anyone has any doubts that females in metal can be intelligent, you’d be a good example.

        Per the rest of your post – spot on. Genial nailed the hypocricy of guys who spend hours (or worship those who spend hours) picking out the “just right” costume of black shirt, black pants, studded collar, and chrome codpiece for a metal show, and occasionally putting on makeup (corpse paint is as laughable as juggalo paint), and cougar is on point with metalheads inanely considering themselves an “open-minded group” when dissenting with the in-group status quo will cause ostracizing and berating said dissenters.

        • Shinaain

          Thank you, Demonic. No MetalSucks snark: I truly, sincerely appreciate that you think so.

      • cougar party

        Actually, your point is well taken. I didn’t really take into account the “intent” argument you made above.

        First of all, let me say that I would be lying if i told you that I didn’t make a point to wear one of my favorite bands t-shirt to a show, but beyond that I don’t really look (or try to look) incredibly “metal”. I don’t think it’s a terrible thing to do as long as you really believe in the image your projecting. I totally see your point on the disingenuous nature of this girl that is somewhat pervasive in metal culture.

        One thing you mention that is true is many metal heads are very passionate about the bands they support. Which is really what separates this genre of music from the rest, in my opinion. In fact, it’s one of the reasons I still love metal to this day. No matter where you are if you see another guy/girl wearing [insert a band you like] t-shirt there is an instant commroderie that goes along with it.

        When people start wearing band shirts and creating an “image” purely for looks it does dilute the scene as a whole and makes the community as a whole look like mindless trend followers, especially girls since they are already scrutinized more than males because of their sheer lack of numbers at metal shows.

        Thanks for your perspective. Insightful as usual.

        • !!!

          This has been an AWESOME comments section. This kind of posting is why I come to this site. I’m also glad that there has been a lot of talk about conformity in the metal community. Personally I don’t subscribe to it much beyond wearing a badass t-shirt. Although I do think some patch-covered jackets are awesome. But yea, I don’t go to shows with something to prove about my “metalness” or machismo. In the end it’s all about having a good time with people of a similar mindset.

          And I am truly empathetic towards womens’ struggle to find a position of equality and respect within the community. Really, aside from punk, metal should be the go-to bastion for tolerance. At it’s core, metal espouses brotherhood and appeals to the disenfranchised and downtrodden. In theory this should apply to men and women alike. In fact, women on average have a ton more shit to deal with. Metal culture is case and point. It just pisses me off, ’cause the last thing I want is real metal women to assume us guys are all chauvinist, elitist assholes.

    • KMFCM

      you should go beat up these girls

      then you’ll be helping get rid of the problem

      if the REAL metal girls chase out the false ones, that would rule

  • Steph

    Has she ever been to a metal show? Generally 90% of people there are ugly, smelly dorks. Who wants to appeal to those guys.

    • Genial Gentile

      1

  • Mitch K

    id fuck her until she was lifeless… i think thats all that really matters.

    • Malamor

      Make sure she is lifeless first

  • canea

    I’ll suspend judgment until I see how her make-up looks after she survives a pit at of those metal concert-things.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Brandon-Mickman/502613553 Brandon Mickman

    i have nothing bad to say about her/the vid, but this seems like a vid for someone that’s not into metal and happens to end up going to a show.

  • Derp

    My girlfriend dresses up for metal concerts with me, and I’m fine with it. There’s people who have even said “Finally, a hot, not fat, ugly woman at a metal concert!” I don’t see why you guys are complaining.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Pantalon-dAndy/680170069 Pantalon d’Andy

      What does it matter if there are fat, ugly chicks at a show? The main point is to see the band.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Aidan-J-Breen/1244041753 Aidan J. Breen

        It matters because fat ugly chicks fucking suck

  • Anthony

    I didn’t find her voice that annoying. And she’s hot. Yeah she sounds like she’s into this shit for the wrong reasons, but I don’t date chicks based on their taste in music.

  • kmfcm

    Pornogrind was invented to creep this type of girl out so they don’t bother.

  • Daniel N.

    Woo the fuck needs to ‘prepare’ for a metal show? If you need to prepare, you’re not Metal, simple as that. This one is a scene chick, nothing more, nothing less. Self conscious, attention starved and music is probably the last thing on her list.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Daniel-Ramirez/581679036 Daniel Ramirez

    I’d hit it, but only if she gets pushed in the middle of a wall of death and comes out with a few bruises and holding someone’s severed limb.

  • Isaac

    I hate this girl. I don’t even care that she’s pretty hot. I really, truly hate her. Obsessing about makeup? Fuck your shit. Going to a concert in heels for the attention? Fuck your shit again, madamoiselle. Highlighting your eyebrows for “intensity”? Ragetastic.

    • Ørsaeth

      I agree with you on most parts. Except the makeup. First off, a lot of girls I know do that (regardless of whether they are metal or not) and second: corpsepaint. That’s a form of makeup. Black metal bands seems to obsess about that. No one complains

  • rdt513

    To be fair, I thought the scene girl in the other link was more annoying.
    Another victory for metal!

  • Fred Durst

    Does anyone know where she features?

  • Sigivald

    Supposed to represent?

    Metal qua metal is supposed to represent something?

    Why wasn’t I informed? I didn’t approve that!

    Seriously, “metal” doesn’t stand for anything in and of itself. (Neither does punk, no matter what any given hyper-sensitive defensive punk fan tells you, either.)

    Whatever you think it stands for, if it’s anything other than “sounding like metal”, some other metal fan will think you’re full of it, and you’ll both be on equally solid ground.

    That is, you’ll both be wrong if you try to say “metal” stands for that thing.

  • http://multimedia-ami.deviantart.com/ amelia

    I seriously hope you don’t think all women are as idiotic and annoying as this…very special individual… just like all metalheads can’t be judged by the actions of that cat burgler chick and Varg Vikernes, not all female metal fans should be judged by this idiot.

  • Andypants!!

    This video makes me feel like a tomboy. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I still look really fucking cute. But when I go to a “metal concert-thing”, Im not really focused on looking the part.

    Granted I do buy shirts from eBay, but they aren’t mutilated just to show more cleave.

  • This

    “It’s all about image, image, image.
    Fuck your song, you’re looking good.”
    Fuck this puta, I love metal and I don’t have to act or look like Barbie to prove it.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Steve-Miller/15618337 Steve Miller

    Meh, I don’t see anything to get riled up about.

  • J.J.

    I’d fuck her.

  • ITTOA666

    Thankfully my dick doesn’t care about how credible someone is.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Niccol-Carli/1356993987 Niccolò Carli

    Metal is 99% posing, so this video fits quite well in.

  • W8ulostme

    I’d love to see what all that make up looks after a show.

  • John

    Stared at tits the whole time.

    • fgdgfdgfdg

      indeed. this girl is definitely worth a squirt. she isn’t even that annoying. great tits.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Andrea-Patsko/1050229356 Andrea Patsko

    She whistles her S’s like Herbert on Family Guy.

  • 10000 Gays

    This video is nothing but a positive for the scene, just saying

  • Cryptopchick

    Being a music girl through and through…I know other music girls. For the most part, we’re a bunch of foul-mouthed broads that under just the right circumstances (too many beers) we’re ready to arm-wrestle any dude. Yeah we lose, but we’re pretty sure we can win….and that’s what’s important. I live in a small city, which actually has a really good metal scene. There are not more than 5 girls that I see out at shows that are true to the “scene”. But those true chicks, are the absolute shit. This little lady, would not fit in so good I’m afraid. And the fact that in another of her make-up tutorials, she’s sittin’ in a neutral-coloured room, with her white bed and white teddy-bears on her white bed…..somethin’s just not adding up here….Not a single Death poster to be seen, but a lovely watercolor painting her grand ma ma might have done. Come to my house, little girl….I’ll show you how to be a hot metal chick…..bring your mascara.

    Not that I really needed to do any detective work. Either you’re a fuckin’ metal chick, or you’re not—I don’t think any real girl that’s hard into it is gonna go lookin’ to create a bunch of posers by making a youtube vid.

    Then again, folks is folks. I hope she has fun at her next metal concert thing.

    -STEPH-

    • Terminus

      I have a strange feeling her definition of Metal is Fall Out Boy

      • Cryptopchick

        They, like…totally make her eyes POP.

  • Kim

    Wow. I’ve been attending metal shows for 25 years now, and had no idea that there was no place for me because I’m a ginger.

    Thanks for this post, I laughed out loud!

  • Terminus

    If you need an instructional video to tell you how to look metal, you’re not fucking metal.

  • http://www.piercingmetal.com PiercingMetal Ken

    That was pretty amusing. Although she didn’t really strike me as a Suffocation fan but perhaps she is after all. At least she is having fun at what she is doing.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Alec-Derp/100001057960631 Alec Derp

    I have a strong urge to kill this woman

  • Slaytanic

    Funny how all the girls talking shit, are way, way less attractive than the one in this video. Jealous girls talk shit, is my point.

    • Cryptopchick

      bahaha…jealous.

      Right.

      I’m not tooting the “I’m hot as fuck” horn or anything…but if I could make my avatar any bigger, I think you’d find you don’t have a leg to stand on with your comment…..

      I don’t think any of us are jealous here, I think we’re annoyed because there’s a little more to being “a hot metal chick” than slapping on a Suffo shirt and getting your blush to match your lips. Get a clue.

  • OLINVILLE

    Where the fuck is ODERUS when you need him?

  • katie

    darn it this is why guys never talk to me at metal shows i guess i was just doing it all wrong when i go see suffocation next week ill be sure to get that whole outfit ….. this is reason why people never take girls seriously i want to rip her fucking uterus out

  • joe

    I always wanted to ask this question and I think I found the right site to ask. If youre a metal chick, so much that you lust after the band members, is she most likely to spread her legs faster than your average metal chick just so that she can be accepted?
    I swear the person i thought you were all talking about was the same chick i am talking about. She is a Suffocation fan, has a few of their shirts, is a makeup artist, is very pretty, even calls herself a “metal queen” on her myspace and twitter, but has small tits. And i like small tits because they will never ever sag. To me, she likes the attention guys give her in the death metal scene. Might I add she has taken pics with quite a few guys in the business which if like mainstream, she knows how to make her way to the back. She dated a vocalist for two years in a local metal band and although she bitches on her myspace about how she is tired of guys not knowing what the fuck they want (guys, you know thats an old line we use when we’re tired of hittin it), she still clings to him on another social site. She is quite intelligent and at 23, already has a makeup business on top of a regular 9to5. But her involvement in this scene scares me in the sense i think she will do “whatever it takes” to fit in. She doesnt wear the gear that i have seen most metal chicks wear. No tattoos, no body or tongue piercings, just her tshirts and she recently dyed her hair purple. Its like she makes herself just borderline enough to fit in. I would think thats sortof “poserish.” Unfortunately, I have acquired a care for this girl. Its her life, she can choose how to live it, I just want my own closure in this matter. So guys, gals, lets hear it. Is this chick the type that would come up to a band guy backstage and let herself be used just for acceptance?

  • Frau Machina

    This video made me cringe. If you’re really into metal you don’t need a fucking tutorial on how to dress or do your makeup. Metal is about rocking it in whatever clothes you like to wear. If someone need tips on what to wear, it only tells me that you’re really not into metal music at all, but a wannabe or poser. I just think she’s completely missing the point.
    -Go as yourself. Don’t doll up as some fake ass Hollywood ‘rocker’ chick.

  • http://www.facebook.com/Evee51 Aoibhinn Byrom-O’brien

    So, does this imply that my red hair, jeans and converse means I’m mistaken for a guy everytime I’m at a gig?

  • Anonymous

    I can’t believe all of the negative comments I am reading.Have you read the video it’s how to look like  a HOT metal chick not how all metal chicks need to look and she looks good.I have been into metal, Iron Maiden,Slayer,Anthrax,Megadeth, etc,since junior high the only shirts I could get then were guy shirts and my mom always said I dressed like a boy.I am now an adult and I wear whatever the fuck I want sometimes it’s even victorias secret pink sometimes it’s a band tee some of them I cut up to look more feminine if they don’t fit right or are a guys tee. I don’t have posters anymore either it’s also not about how you decorate your house!  you are posers if you think that it’s mandatory to have to have tattoos,piercings,and look like a dude and act like one too what now you can’t act like a lady to listen to metal? ridiculous. It’s not how you dress it’s about the music.Tattoos are so mainstream now I know grandmas who are just getting them seriously a girl not having any tattoos or piercings  is more individual now thanks to Suicide Girls brainwashing every girl into having them.News flash some of us like to look pretty and sexy and listen to metal too.