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Contests

PHOTO CAPTION CONTEST: WIN AN AUTOGRAPHED COPY OF OZZY’S SCREAM!

 Thursday, October 28th, 2010 at 5:35pm by

Last week we offered up an autographed copy of Shadows Fall’s recently released Madness in Manila Live CD/DVD and a nifty Zoom Q3 Handy Video Recorder, all in exchange for coming up with the funniest caption to the Shadows Fall photo at right. The winner is Jewers [I swear I didn't pick him because of his name], with this little nugget of lulz:

  • Jewers: “I’m telling you guys, Shadows Fall’s experimental NWNAHM album Reds of Life was the seminole record of the genre.”

Multiple points for multiple puns! Or “+1″ as the kids these days say.

This week we’re giving away a copy of the Tour Edition of Ozzy’s latest album Scream, autographed by the Prince of Darkness himself! You know the rules: to win, just come up with the funniest caption to the below photo, and remember to use a real email address (or post it with your comment if you’re using FB Connect)! Thanks to John Pewo of the U.S. Air Force for sending it in.

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  • ZackP

    Olan Mills has never seen such br00tality

    ZackP3750@verizon.net

    • Bayon

      I spy with my little eye…a GBH punk bitch and…a guy?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Bob-Grinsell/552722723 Bob Grinsell

    Jay Gordon shows off pictures of his new backing band, Orgy 2.0.

    oniofthe100@yahoo.com

  • Tim

    “I fucking hate my two lesbian daughters.”

  • yzermantiis

    Stewart hurry up and smile or you’ll be late for soccer practice!!

  • Seanicus

    This is the backside of the mother’s suicide note.

  • Malamor

    Now I know why tigers eat there young.

  • Ares

    A delightful family of aliens pose in front of their home planet before they head off to their vacation to the Andromeda galaxy.

  • Sacajawea

    The aliens could have sworn that seaguls weren’t so fucking ugly the last time they abducted them.

  • Sacajawea

    Hold Mommy’s hand honey, that photographer looks like a real weirdo.

  • http://deleted Ken

    You have entered the Hot Topic zone!!

  • Pete

    Does anyone really even want a copy of Ozzy’s “Scream”? Even an autographed one? For real dudes….

    • http://deleted Ken

      no not really. But if something pops into my head I’ll submit it anyway

    • >_>

      I nominate this entry.

    • BruisedMetal

      Well if you won you can put it up on ebay for way more than anybody should pay and some 30 something year old guy that still has an ozzy and randy poster flag hanging above his bed wearing his vintage blizzard of ozz shirt will pay top dollar for the signed cd nobody really wants

    • SourDeez

      Can he even sign his own name anymore?

  • ImMattMan

    The Sisters Menendez.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christian-Varg-Voltaggio/1409575074 Christian Varg Voltaggio

    The winners of this photo caption contest as their prize is revealed: an autographed copy of Ozzy’s ‘Scream!’

  • dspang

    Today on “Behind the Music: Lady Gaga, the Punk Years.”

  • Alex

    Barf at (or in front of) the Moon

    • Alex

      alexander.chappell [at] gmail [dot] com

  • http://www.myspace.com/signorojoswe Kaffebaggel

    “We’ll get you next time superman!!!!”

    • canea

      Made me laugh – nice one.

    • metal_viking

      yes and yes

  • dan nash

    flock of brootalz

  • chainchomp

    If you’re fucking your chick and you think you’re about to spunk way too quickly, just take a look at this……………

  • skullsession

    GBH’s “city baby attacked by rats” incarnate.

  • Jon

    Flog the C-Goths

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Corey-Mitchell/660352330 Corey Mitchell

    Flock of Nutbags

  • Biclops

    “If I plug my kid-hole hard enough, another one of these things won’t pop out.”

  • Sacajawea

    Wanna know where people go to snag an i-nter-galactic rel-ations-hip, say, Just for future reference? “i-nter-galactic Central”? “Saturn” ? or “YourAnus”?*** InterGalacticGangBang.com*** is the real place that is packed with them. ;)
    zzzzzzzz

  • Sean Goff

    Don’t worry, this promo shot for MTV’s new Osbournes prequel didn’t impress too many studio heads either. Which means it will only be on for 2 seasons…

  • fightingmike

    Flock Of Cylons!

  • fightingmike

    Goth Talk with Israel Abyss!!!

  • Jay Jay

    Christina Applegate: before the Married with Children Years

  • MW

    that chicks just pissed off because goth music sucks

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Chris-Lyons/1593360020 Chris Lyons

      winner winner chicken dinner! hahahaha

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ben-Robson/1375985482 Ben Robson

      hahaha i love it

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/David-Ness/529537766 David Ness

    I HATE You Mom! Now give me $20 so I can get a new shirt at Hot Topic!

  • Metalmeathammer666

    Punk is dead, and so is my boner.

  • A2James

    This is one grievious family portrait

  • Please Help Me Eat My Own Head

    “Why the fuck did i adopt kids from the United Kingdom”

    • stuartp

      Haha, best one so far.

    • The Metalosopher

      Hahaha. Excellent.

  • Alex_P

    The mullet family, 15 years, one unexpected pregnancy and a messy divorce later.

  • Cryzthormagnusian

    This prize is not worth a funny caption.

  • Moltanic

    This is why you’re not supposed to drink during pregnancy

    Moltanic@Gmail.com

    • MW

      no thats why if you do drink you dont pussy out half way

  • Ace_Deputy_Cheeze

    It’s the latest craze!
    The 3 Tards Moon shirt

  • W8ulostme

    The consequences of a mother compromising with her kids during family picture day.

  • tyler09

    looks like she got lucky with Marilyn Manson and Mike Score

  • http://www.myspace.com/whitearmsofathena Josh

    Don’t tell mom the bird landed on my head

  • ChromaticJustice

    “Here are the last Three Contestants from Rock of Love”

  • Scott D

    Mommy’s Little Monsters!

  • penron

    And thats why retards should not have children

  • meatpopsicle

    If I did not fear incarceration from human authority figures, I would terminate your life functions by applying sufficient pressure to your blunt skull so as to force its collapse!

    • evilfatguy

      You know your day has ended well when you encounter a Coneheads reference.

  • Rob

    The above picture shows that no matter how chaotic a family may look, it can always be loving and compassionate. Just look at those smiles! :D

  • Jim

    Inspired by the touching song “Lesbian Seagull”, the McNulty sisters decided to pay it tribute in follicular form.

  • Jim

    She scoffs at Nicolas Cage’s pathetic birdhair.

  • Vasteburai

    The shitty Kittie.

  • canea

    Daddy couldn’t be here, kids. He’s putting in some quality overtime at the bar…drinking away his shame.

  • http://multimedia-ami.deviantart.com amelia

    *pulls picture out of wallet* “Yes, these two are mine.”
    “you must be so proud…”
    “Oh, I am.”

    • http://multimedia-ami.deviantart.com amelia

      Scratch that, and just imagine what it must be like when that mom pulls out a picture of her family to show someone her “pride and joy”.

  • metallicbrian

    Conformists.

  • David

    One gets the impression the photographer did not survive the shoot.

    #2

    “Moon over Morons”

  • Igottawocket

    Mom: In the name of god help me….

  • noinfo

    My daughters’ turned into martians!!!!….Oh oh oh…..I cannot recall their names…Oh eh oh!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Tom-Horton/1074905683 Tom Horton

    Before meeting Lars , James Hetfield briefly fronted Flock Of Seaguls

    vulgardisplay21@aol.com

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/JT-OBrien/568906438 JT OBrien

    this is why windows cloud was made

  • d.o.g.o.b.g.y.n.

    In an effort to garner a new demographic, the Stella D’Oro company begins a new ad campaign marketing its Breakfast Treats to abandoned wives and their lesbian daughters.

  • http://www.metalsucks.net DeaThrash

    I get the feeling all three people are pissed off at the father, but for different reasons.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christian-Varg-Voltaggio/1409575074 Christian Varg Voltaggio

    The family that flashes titties at Ozzfest together, stays together.

  • >_>

    Find one mistake.

  • http://kvltofpersonality@yahoo.com kvlt of personality

    “The thought of this picture being taken brings forth great pains to my womb!”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Richard-Adragna/18902481 Richard Adragna

    The Kittie family portrait!

    adragnarichard@gmail.com

  • Etzell

    The first incarnation of the Misfits left much to be desired.

    michael.beem@mu.edu

  • TurdFerguson

    Wayne Static’s sister is kind of hot.

  • Mark

    In space, no one can hear you scream.

    • The Metalosopher

      Alien reference = total win. Nice one.

  • Major Zim

    the best abstinence argument ive seen yet.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

    The circle of life in the suburbs. Goth, Flock of Seagulls, bored housewife.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

    Twilight night at the Smith house.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

    The members of the Mormons for Twilight, Utah chapter.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

    GBH stands for got bad hair.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

    Awaiting Molly’s pregnacy test results after sleeping with a couple Manson roadies.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Clayton-Russell/553693986 Clayton Russell

    Take the picture already, I have to piss worse than Ozzy at the Alamo.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Marcus-Papadopoulo/1169115237 Marcus Papadopoulo

    I wish I listened to their advice and shaved my head instead…..damn itch….

  • Darumian

    Gonna Be Hipsters.

  • no-ghost

    one of these things is not like the others, one of these things doesn’t belong…………….

  • BruisedMetal

    Mom wishes she didnt get crunked all those times when she was pregnant

  • http://www.facebook.com/digitalnarcosis Graham Mitchell

    “Sigmund Freud rolls in his grave laughing as his theories on oedipal complexes and fatherless misdirection are verified one $19.95 family photo package at a time…”

    graham.mitchell.drums@gmail.com

  • http://www.moviewiseguys.com John Manfre

    WE WON’T CONFORM TO YOUR WAYS, OLAN MILLS!!!!

  • jethr0skull

    I know those ppl they caught lil ryan(bottom) in his room sticking a carrot up his ass so he ran away.carol(mom) drank her self to death in95 and. Kimmy now fronts abigailwilliams.

  • Chimp 0 Neg

    New Dimmu Borgir touring band revealed.

  • MoshUntilPanic

    Proud mother.

    why would you go to a photographer when you’ve messed your kids up that bad?!

    also, is ozzy’s signature legible? i imagine his hand is a little shaky these days.

  • stiggs

    Hanzel Und Gretyl’s biggest fans.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christopher-Rowan/531575311 Christopher Rowan

    I’m sure someone already come up with some variation of it but:

    Flock of Evils!

  • Taron Keim

    “Darlene, shhh! I can’t remember if the milkman was wearing THAT much eyeliner!”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Tommy-Smith/536128956 Tommy Smith

    The symptom of the universe is written in your eyes

  • Dingas McCloud

    Tourbus Tara has two regrets in her life…

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mike-Kidwell/38210651 Mike Kidwell

    Gee, I wonder why dad left?

  • Michael Menke

    You laugh now, but wait until you find out that the mom is the one with a dick.

  • heemeyer

    there was some confusion at the ridley scott fan convention: some cosplayers in thelma & louise and blade runner garb wandered onto the set of the new alien sequel.

  • Metal Dan

    Parenting Fail!

  • Blargh

    All three: “I hate my life so fucking much.”

  • jeff

    Marilyn Manson is such a jerk! Impregnating this nice woman then leaving her.

  • WowWee!

    Don’t smile it will make the picture turn out weird.

  • pigchop

    OHHHH, I get it. A lame photo for a lame album. hahaha. Very funny. so, soooo funny.

  • MovieQuoteGuy

    In space, no one can hear Ozzy’s “Scream”

  • T-Bird

    In space, nobody can hear you screamo.

  • http://www.schenkeltown.com Schenkeltown

    “kids, the reason i hold my vagina in photos is to remind myself what happens when you have sex with the drummer of whitesnake”

  • chainchomp

    *yawn*…….and once again Kittie has made a change in their line up.

  • obc

    punks not dead… but i wish it was.

  • LoomeyTunes

    The Cure’s first Publicity Photos.

  • poopy

    Dave Mustane, Davy Havok, and Sebastian Bach form a super group: A Mega Fire Death Row

  • Your Hero

    Punks Not DEAD….Its in the Midwest!

  • http://www.ceaserin.com Jay

    “I went to the moon and all I got were these two stupid kids.”

  • Nico Cervantes

    They make look uncomfortable now, but this is nothing compared to when they had “the sex talk” last week.

  • AngryOx

    Ozzy autograph? This prize sucks. I would ebay that shit immediately.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Casey-Carnage/1021412523 Casey Carnage

    Talk about coming from Uranus!

    casey@carnagecrew.net

  • jimbo slice

    Mom was worried that the background the photographer picked out would make the family look weird

  • thatcomedian

    Guess which one got kicked out of the band?

  • http://www.twistedcritic.wordpress.com Chris

    Quote possibly the inspiration for Rob Zombie’s Halloween.

  • Slammm

    The Aristocrats’ press kit photo

  • http://www.flamingtusk.com Zosimus

    Early concept artwork for “Crack The Skye”.

  • Heywood

    Wow, kids. Like I met that trippy dude, I mean your father, like 15 years ago and I’m still frying my tits off.

  • Kevin

    “A Flock of Seashit!”

  • CosineOmerta

    Mom: “I should have known better than to buy a Flowbee from a witchdoctor.”

  • weezleteets

    PUNKS IN SPACE!!!!

  • Mutt Weiler

    Additional evidence that capital punishment needs to be reinstated.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nicholi-Stephaan-Cervantes/1281091549 Nicholi Stephaan Cervantes

    Is there something in my teeth?

  • Failure

    I never knew Mike Score and Robert Smith were brothers…but it all makes sense now.

  • Skanes

    You’re never too punk to hold your mother’s hand.

  • hexbasher

    with the power of scientology and prescription uppers, we too can pray away the conformist emo trend

  • the misfit poop

    Fucking magnets…. How do they work?

    • http://multimedia-ami.deviantart.com amelia

      oh, we’re saying those again? I’m just gonna say what we’ve all been thinking..
      fucking condoms, how do they work?
      or
      Fucking electric razors, how do they work?!?

      • Bayon

        Or fuckin’ originality, how does it work?

  • http://multimedia-ami.deviantart.com amelia

    Gull-gor-goth

  • Jake

    It’s a Jersey Thing.