Whoah shun, it’s The Ocean!!

-KW

It seems like the number of “Why did you ban me from commenting?!?” e-mails from readers has increased as of late, and the gist of those e-mails is often “Whassa matter, can’t take it when someone tells you you suck?” or whatever. And we’ve never banned anyone for disagreeing with us. We don’t give a shit if you disagree with us. We don’t agree with one another half the time — that’s part of the fun of MetalSucks.

Here’s what really happens: you use a word which is on our “no-no” list, and it gets stuck in our spam filter. Some of these words we actively do not allow on MetalSucks (e.g., slurs against minorities), and some of them just get stuck because so many actual spammers use them (e.g., “rape”). We try to be diligent about checking the spam filters and making sure none of you are getting caught in there, but sometimes we miss a few. And sometimes we ultimately don’t allow the comment onto the site (e.g., “I hate this album, this band is fucking gay” will never survive). But even then, we don’t BAN people from commenting. I think I can count on one hand the number of people we’ve banned in four years, and most of them were spammers and/or former Megadeth guitarists. So if your comment isn’t going through, consider first if you used a word we don’t allow, and if you didn’t, just shoot us a POLITE e-mail and we’ll investigage the problem ASAP. M’kay?

And on that note, here’s what we did this week:

• Darkest Hour’s Mike Schleibaum gave us our latest Legacy Tour diary, Intronaut’s Sacha Dunable worked out his black metal daddy issues, and The Red Chord’s Greg Weeks offered to write a song for any sports team that’s not from New York.
• We spoke to After the Burial’s Trent Hafdahl and American Hardcore author Steven Blush.
• We got the skinny from Darkest Hour’s Ryan Parrish about why DH and Veil of Maya got kicked off their own tour bus, and asked Jucifer’s Amber Valentine about Sean Yseult’s claim to being the only woman in metal during her tenure in White Zombie.
• We checked out the latest release from The Unraveling.
• Sergeant D. schooled us in uber-kvlt metalcore bands.
• We contemplated the worst metal albums of 2010 and the best metal songs of 2010.
• We mourned on the six year anniversary of Dimebag’s murder.
• We celebrated Ozzy Osbourne’s terrific taste in modern metal (he put Korn above Firewind).
• We had mixed feelings about the retirement of Judas Priest.
• We got excited that At the Gates are playing more shows in 2011.

Alrighty then. Next week is our last week of regular posting before we shut down for the holidays. You know what that means – YEAR END LISTS! Get ready to argue like your entire sense of self-worth depended on everyone agreeing with you all the time with no exceptions ever.

-AR

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Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

This week’s question was once again suggested by “Hipsters Out of Metal!” columnist Anso DF, and even though the Grammy nominations were actually announced last week, it still seemed like a fun debate to have. So:

WHAT ARE YOUR NOMINATIONS FOR BEST METAL GRAMMY?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

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I’m sad to say that Eyal wasn’t able to do a new “Jumping Darkness Parade” this week — but cut the dude some slack, he’s currently on tour in Europe!

So to make sure you get your Levi fix this week, I thought that now would be an ideal time to post the below live footage of Daath performing at the Crocodile Rock in Allentown, PA last weekend, as part of the band’s recent tour with Chimaira, Impending Doom, and This or The Apocalypse. It starts with a drum solo from the always-excellent Kevin Talley, and the goes into “Double Tap Suicide,” one my favorite songs from the band’s new, self-titled album. I haven’t had a chance to see the band perform any of the new shit live yet, so this video made my day.

If you’re one of our European readers, Daath’s current tour with Fear Factory and High on Fire continues through December 20. That’s a great fuckin’ bill, ain’t it? Get dates here.

-AR

[via Metal Injection]

I think I’ve made it pretty clear that thus far, The Damned Things bore me to tears, despite being both an Anthrax fan and an Every Time I Die fan. But I was holding out hope that when I heard their debut, Ironiclast, in its entirety, my mind would be changed. That there would be some awesome hard rock on there that the band just hand’t unveiled to the world yet. I actively wanted to eat a bag of crow on this one.

No such luck. The album is now streaming in full over at Ultimate-Guitar.com, and it’s not doin’ a damn thing for me (see what I did there?). Again, it’s not terrible, just soporific. At least there are no power ballads, I guess.

But I’m sure that some of you will disagree with me, vocally, in the comments section if you’re so inclined. So, y’know. Have at it.

Ironiclast comes out on Tuesday, just in time for you to teach an old person how to illegally download it for Christmas.

-AR

I know I’ve already written about Graf Orlock twice this week (here and here), but their new EP, Doombox, is just that fucking good (read our review here). And now Brooklyn Vegan is giving away a track from that EP, “Job Hunt,” for free! Go listen to and download it here.

Yeah, it only runs less than a minute and a half, and twenty seconds of that time is devoted to an audio clip from the movie Harsh Times, but the whole EP is only like twelve minutes long, so it’s not like they can really give any more away. But it’s a killer song, and hopefully it will whet your appetite to hear the rest of the album.

Doombox comes out on Vitriol on January 18; pre-orders start December 17 here.

-AR

From the maker of the Heavy Metal Fun Time Activity Book comes a new product to dole upon your little one who’s obviously too young to appreciate it in full now but will definitely grow to love it in time; an ABC’s poster that’s printed in famous metal band logo fonts!

Printed on Silver Metal Currency Paper, this 18×24 hand-printed silkscreen is limited to only 80 prints. If that’s not metal enough for you, there’s another version limited to only 10 prints that’s pressed on 18×24 stainless steel! Says the product website, “Attach some straps to the back and carry it as a shield into the war between the metal gods!”

And, hey, guess what? We’re giving one of the paper prints away! A reader named Kris suggested this contest idea, and we loved it, so we’re totally doing it. Details of how to win after the jump!

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I’ve always felt indifferent towards Belphegor, but enough of you e-mailed us about their new song, “Impaled Upon the Tongue of Satan,” that I feel obligated to post about it.

So: Belphegor have a new song! It’s called “Impaled Upon the Tongue of Satan,” which is an early contender for “Silliest Song Title of 2011,” but I’ll let it slide if the band makes a shirt bearing that phrase and a graphic of The Dark Lord going down on some poor girl. You can listen to the track here. It sounds like Belphegor to me, but, again, I’m not the hugest fan of this band (don’t hate ‘em, just kinda don’t care), so maybe one of you can find a more articulate way to describe it in the comments section.

“Impaled Upon the Tongue of Satan” comes off of Belphegor’s new album, Blood Magick Necromance, which comes out in North America on February 8 and in Europe on January 14 via Nuclear Blast. The band is touring with Deicide in February and whatever is currently passing for Sepultura in April, so it looks like they’re going to have an eventful 2011. You can get dates here.

-AR

When Metal Sludge reminded us of its glory days last month with a new list of the Top 10 Drunkest Living Rock Stars of All Time I was surprised to see Bang Tango / Beautiful Creatures frontman Joe LeSte place #9. I mean it wouldn’t surprise me if he was a drunk, but could he really out-do Chris Holmes’ famous pool interview, ranked at #10?

Then I saw this footage, linked in the article:

Note his band members roll their eyes after being addressed as “fuckheads” following a minute of Joe’s drunken ranting. Followed by more ranting, more eye-rolling and a lame cover. With a missed intro cue. This video is sad in so many ways!

And then this:

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I don’t really know what the phrase “relentless reckless forever” means — I understand what “relentlessly reckless forever” would mean — but I also don’t think it’s all that important. What is important is that we’re getting a new Children of Bodom album on March 8 via Universal Music.

And, uh, that’s it for now I guess. That album art sure does look Children of Bodomy, doesn’t it?

After the jump is a trailer for the video of the first single, “Was it Worth It?” I hate music video trailers, but I’m posting this in lieu of a new song, or something more substantial to check out. You only get to hear a little bit of new music, which doesn’t really tell you much, but there is some footage of a dude riding a skateboard while it’s on fire, which is pretty bad-assed. The video was apparently directed by Dale “Delight” Restighini, which immediately makes me want to hate it, ’cause that dude is such a massive tool that I once saw Bob Villa use him to fix a sink, but I guess I should reserve final judgment until I see the full clip. (On a semi-related note, I just googled Dale ’cause I can never remember how to spell his last name, and the SECOND RESULT to come up was this. Hilarious.)

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So MetalSucks Maniac Shane Gillis sent us a link to the below interview with Vince Neil, and while little to nothing of what Neil says is actually interesting, what is interesting is that Neil is clearly hammered. Either that, or he’s retarded. I mean, we’ve always known that Vince Neil is a little retarded (look at that downey face), but in this case, I think it’s safe to say that he’s smashed.

“Why is that interesting, Axl?” you ask. “Vince Neil is, like, always drunk, isn’t he?” Yes, that’s true. But as Mr. Gillis pointed out in his e-mail to us, at the end of the interview, Vince gets in his car to drive his lady friends home, presumably to re-create his sex tape with Janine Lindemulder and whomever the other chick with her face blurred out was. Since we haven’t heard that Neil died or killed anyone, presumably he made it home alright, but you do have to wonder: how many times is this asshole gonna get behind the wheel while he’s sloshed? He’s just not gonna be satisfied until he kills and/or cripples a few people AGAIN, is he? Why the fuck is he even still allowed to drive at this point? I mean, at this point, you wouldn’t ever send your kid over to go swimming in Tommy Lee’s pool, would you?

-AR

[via Blabbermouth]

Sometimes you want to be grim and you want to mosh, and for those kinds of moods there’s bands like San Francisco’s At Our Heels. At Our Heels are a hardcore band at heart, but — much like similar artists such as Black Anvil, Masakari and Black Breath — they inject a healthy dose of black metal attitude and chord voicings into their fast and brutal attack. This is the kind of band I’d like to see live and just absolutely lose my shit to in the pit; dark and dirty, but at the same time possessing an air of fun.

Misanthropy and Godlessness is out now on Creator-Destructor Records. Thanks to vocalist Alex Pulisci for sending this in!

-VN

So back in May, Max Cavalera blamed Andreas Kisser for our current lack of a Sepultura reunion. And while I took Max’s side at the time, Anso schooled me right proper just a couple of days later, proposing that Max might be, um, less than honorable. And now that Max is changing his story just seventh months later, it’s getting really, really hard not to think that Anso nailed it right on the head.

See, all of a sudden, Max is on an anti-Paulo Jr. campaign. Last week he told Revolver that Paulo was “the only musician that didn’t improve much” during the classic Sepult-era, even going so far as to allege that Paulo didn’t record any of the bass tracks on any Sep releases prior to Roots. I didn’t think much of it at the time; for one thing, I don’t think that Paulo is anyone’s favorite member of Sepultura, and for another thing, even though it might seem weird that Max is asserting that for roughly a decade the band has a bass player so untalented that he couldn’t record his album tracks and no one ever thought to replace him, I’m sad to say that I’ve heard stories like that before, so it actually seemed entirely plausible.

But now Metal Insider has brought it to my attention that Max is once again talking smack on his former bandmate, this time saying it’s all Paulo’s fault, and not Andreas’ fault, that there hasn’t been a Sep reunion. He tells Sonic Excess:

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Let’s keep this short n’ sweet: the winner for the final evening in the festival of lights is reader Kris Weathers, who correctly answered last night’s trivia question. System Divide is the band with an Israeli female vocalist released an album in September. A lot of you guessed GodWrath, who are Israeli and do have a female singer, but did not, to the best of my knowledge, release an album in September.

ANYWAY, Kris, like the seven other winners of this year’s contest, gets a mystery prize courtesy of Century Media, and a dreidel, courtesy of us. Mazel tov, Kris!

We’d like to thank everyone who played, we’d like to thank Century for continuing to indulge, and unless the world ends or something, we look forward to doing this again next year!

-AR

After the Burial released their new album In Dreams on November 23rd just before heading out to California for their current tour with Winds of Plague. On the day of the album’s release I caught up with ATB guitarist Trent Hafdahl by phone; we chatted about the new album, new vocalist Anthony Notarmaso and his role in the writing process, what really went down when they dropped off the Bleeding Through tour this fall, their plans for 2011 and, of course, Sumeriancore. Our chat after the fold.

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Last week we offered a War From A Harlots Mouth prize package to the winner of our weekly Photo Caption Contest. That winner is one Dingas McCloud, and here’s his caption to the photo at right:

“Santa doesn’t leave any presents under the bigotree.”

This week we’re giving away a MetalSucks hoodie! They’re very comfy, will keep you warm through the winter, and you’ll look great to boot. They’re also available for purchase here (along with several t-shirt designs) if you’re so inclined. This week’s photo comes from MS reader Tom Braund; the chap in the picture may or may not be Tom himself, since he didn’t happen to say. The rules as per usual: just come up with the funniest caption to the below photo, and remember to use a real email address (or post it with your comment if you’re using FB Connect)!

Before there were blogs there were these things called magazines, and the only metal magazine we still get excited about reading every month is Decibel. Here’s managing editor Andrew Bonazelli.

“People tend to avoid people in capes. I know that’s not the case here… but look at these people.” —Paul Rudd, Role Models

Indeed, there are few (public) places on earth where capes are not frowned upon. The LARP-friendly park space in Role Models is one of them; another is evidently the V.I.P. beer tent at 2006’s Download Fest in Donington Park, England, ’cause I saw Satyricon’s Frost totally stroll through the morass of international “journalists” like he was ready to leap off a Hong Kong skyscraper.

(I know, the Batman comparison is reaching — Frost is more like the kind of guy who’d sew a cell phone bomb in your gunt.)

Anyway, his band’s 1996 full-length, Nemesis Divina — the latest honoree in our Hall of Fame, which is a lot easier to assemble when there are two people to interview — struts just as confidently in the shaky terrain between orthodoxy and abandon. Of course, superfans will know that there weren’t just two interviews to conduct — resident Darkthrone hiking advocate Nocturno Culto helped out on guitar and very nearly stuck around permanently. That’s just one of many intriguing nuggets surrounding the creation of Nemesis — Satyr discovered that Frost was nearly blind, and the titillating NSFW “Mother North” video was one of Norwegian black metal’s first.

Some (adults) would suggest that this was Satyricon’s last good record. Some (kids) have always found them clownish. Where do you guys stand?

-AB

You can order the January 2011 issue of Decibel here if you wanna read the Hall of Fame entry on Satyricon’s Nemesis Divina. But if you get a full subscription, not only will you never miss a Hall of Fame, but every month you’ll get an exclusive flexi disc of never-before-released music, too.

If MetalSucks had a GQ-style 2010 Men of the Year award, all of my votes would go to Lakers forward Ron Artest. Though best known for his jaunt into mass face-punching in 2004, Artest is since lauded for his high-profile campaign to raise awareness of youth mental health issues. To date, more than $450k has been raised in his raffle (not auction) to win his 2009-2010 NBA Championship ring; yesterday, it was announced that he will donate a portion (possibly the entirity) of next season’s $7 million salary. Plus, Artest matches his wallet-emptying with efforts to de-stigmatize mental illness in the public: In an on-court interview following that game seven championship victory, an unabashedly ecstatic Artest reserved biggest thanks for his psychiatrist. The guy has travelled light years from his rookie days of locker-room boozing at halftime (!) and semi-regular legal tangles.

To put Ron’s ascent to awesomeness into context, let’s all consider fellow amateur rapper/Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee, who has just taken a firm public stand in a similarly vital debate: collecting semen from a captive whale. Uh yeah. From Lee’s semi-coherent letter to SeaWorld president Terry Prather:

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So Yahoo! has Ozzy Osbourne’s personal list of the Top Ten Metal Albums of 2010, and it may or may not surprise you to learn that it’s a really, really interesting mix of terrible and brain dead. (By the way, if you don’t like MetalSucks articles where I can really, really, really angry about something of less than no importance, then you should stop reading now.)

Okay so check out his list, and then I’ll tell you my thoughts. And before we begin, I should point out that it’s theoretically possible Ozzy didn’t actually choose these release, but, rather, than one of his handlers did it for him. But since it’s being labeled as “Ozzy’s list,” I am going to treat it as though it were written by Ozzy.

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Remember all the way back on Monday (put down that bong!) when we reported that Darkest Hour and Veil of Maya had been kicked off their shared tour bus just before the Dallas stop of their Legacy Tour with Periphery and Revocation? We caught up with DH drummer Ryan Parrish yesterday and he gave us the full scoop on what went down to result in his band’s eviction from their home on wheels:

Well, okay, here’s the thing: the bus driver is a total douchebag — like, just a cocksucker.  He was OCD as shit.  He was always coming on the bus and we’d be partying and shit and he just didn’t like it.  He didn’t think that we cleaned up, which we cleaned every single day, but he was such a dick that he would say that we weren’t cleaning everything just to start drama and shit.  If there were like 2 beer cans on the table, he’d take a picture of it and send it to his company saying that we were destroying the bus lounge.

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