Everyone's Replaceable

BULLSH*T GUNS N’ ROSES NEWS OF THE DAY: WE ALL KNOW WHO THE NEW SINGER FOR VELVET REVOLVER IS, AND GN’R ARE NOT REUNITING FOR THE SUPERBOWL

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Here’s the latest round of idiotic news revolving around the band you can pretty much blame for this website’s existence.

First of all, Corey Taylor has been heavily rumored to be the new vocalist for Velvet Revolver, and then a couple of weeks ago, he refused to contradict that rumor, thereby pretty much confirming it. Now Metal Insider tells me that Duff McKagan thinks he’s being cute by pretty much doing the same thing, telling fans during a recent online chat that “I can neither confirm nor deny” that Taylor is the group’s new singer before apparently mistaking Taylor for a can of Pepsi: “He’s the voice of a whole new generation.”

Slipknot’s been around for over a decade now, so I guess McKagan doesn’t actually know what the phrase “new generation” means, but whatever. Like I said last month, there’s absolutely no reason to say shit like this in the press unless Taylor got the job. And at this point, VR absolutely needs to start denying the rumor, or just announce Taylor as the new singer. Because now if he’s not the new singer, whomever the new singer is is gonna hafta be pretty frickin’ awesome and/or famous, or the whole thing is just gonna seem anticlimactic. In fact, if Taylor isn’t the new singer, I’d say they either need to get Robert Plant, or just announce a reunion of the original Guns N’ Roses.

Which, incidentally, some morons think is what’s gonna happen. From Classic Rock:

“Rumours have started that the classic Guns N’ Roses line-up will get back together for next year’s Superbowl.

“Believe it or not, but the story is that negotiations are already underway for Axl Rose, Slash, Duff McKagen [That’s not how you spell his name, idiots. You run a fucking GN’R story twice every day, you think you’d get it right by now. – Ed.] and Izzy Stradlin to reunite. The drummer would be either Steven Adler or Matt Sorum, with Dizzy Reed on keyboards.”

So first of all, after last week’s performance, I think we can all agree that Slash and all Slash-related projects should be banned from the Superbowl, or any live televised performance, for the rest of all time.

Second of all, we hear rumors like this every couple of months, it seems, and at some point, I hope, people will wise up and figure out that it’s bullshit. There might be a GN’R reunion some day, but not today, and not at the Super Bowl next year. In fact, I will go on record right now and say that if this happens, I will actually boil and eat a pair of Vince’s boxers. This is worth getting excited about as much as Metallica’s latest creative masterpiece.

-AR

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