Deciblog scribe Jeanne Fury claims to have seen the above men’s bathing suit in a storefront window in Asbury Park, NJ this past weekend. Do we believe her? I’d liken this statement in high fashion to Sergeant D’s Burzum clothing line if not for the fact that it came from New Jersey, the arsehole of America, and from the Jersey Shore above all (yeah, that Jersey Shore).

I’ve never worn a banana-hammock bathing suit before (these days I like board shorts), but for this gem it might be worth having my package bundled up for all to see. Because we all need a little Vinnie Paul in our bunghole.

-VN

Somehow, it’s fucking August already. So the bad news is, I forgot to send in my rent check on time again, and the good news is, we’re just a couple of weeks away from the release of Pain is a Warning, the awesome new album from Today is the Day.

And — HOO-RAY!!! — the increasingly-metal-friendly NPR is now giving away a free download of the title track. When I spoke to new TITD drummer Curran Reynolds (who also plays with the totally righteous Wetnurse, along with TITD bassist Ryan Jones) this past March, he told me that Pain is a Warning “is the most accessible Today is the Day record” and that mainman Steve Austin “is embracing rock more so than ever before” — and this song certainly demonstrates that. It manages to be a huge rock anthem — some of it reminds me of pre-pussification Queens of the Stone Age — without sacrificing any of the fucknutsness that has drawn so many of us to Mr. Austin’s work in the past. It’s friggin’ great.

Download the track here, then tell Josh Homme to toss Steve Austin’s salad in our comments section. Pain is a Warning – which, it’s worth mentioning, was produced by the legendary Kurt Ballou — comes out August 16 on Black Market Activities.

-AR

I’m going to put about as much effort into this introduction as Courtney Love puts into maintaining the appearance of being sane.

First up today we have the video for “Breakdowns Breakdowns Breakdowns,” from Bury Your Breakdown. Because original vocalist Mat Breakdown has returned to the fold, some people are calling this “the comeback of the year.” Those people need to listen to the new Decapitated album. Although I suspect they may not enjoy it do to a severe absence of breakdowns. Because people who love Bury Your Breakdown really break down breakdowns. I mean, they can’t breakdown with break, d’own? Breakdown breakdown breakdown, breakdown downbreak break down breakdown! HA! Breaky breakdowns.

Click to read more…

A little bit of re-branding can go a long way in metal; “power metal” couldn’t be any farther out of fashion in the metal climate of 2011, but NWOBHM revival / retro / “trad metal” acts are totally in. Both types of bands play the same Judas Priest and Iron Maiden-inspired riffs; one has slicked up production and a spiffed up image while the other’s ripped jean jackets, leather wristbands and lack of keyboards compliment their seemingly “dirtier” musical aesthetic. Voila, re-branding; put the same music in a different package and what once was not cool suddenly is.

I had this realization whilst watching the new video from Sweden’s Wolf at Heavy Blog is Heavy. There are plenty of qualities that differentiate Wolf from Gamma Ray, Edguy, Primal Fear or any one of a number of other German power metal bands, but the music itself certainly isn’t one of them. Still, you’d be a lot more likely to see this band on tour with White Wizzard or Graveyard than Hammerfall. Not that this is a bad thing, because I like power metal. But let’s just call a spade a spade when we see it.

-VN

In case the bad joke in my headline didn’t give it away, In Flames have dropped off of the remainder of this year’s Mayhem Fest. A statement by the group released over the weekend explains that “a serious terminal illness of one the band’s immediate family members” is the cause of the cancellation — which is a valid excuse if ever there was one — and promises that In Flames “will be back at the start of 2012.”

There’s not much analysis to be offered here; having a sick family member is a terrible thing, and very obviously needs to take priority over pretty much anything else. Whichever band member it is, we wish him well during this hard time.

And it’s a bummer for fans — even if Sounds of a Playground Fading wasn’t exactly the best album ever, IF can still bring it live. The silver lining is that lots of other great artists are still on the bill. Get remaining tour dates here.

-AR

“Supergroup” is a rough beat; that tag along seems to generate feelings that the sum will never equal the greatness of all its individual parts combined (see: Audioslave, Chickenfoot, Velvet Revolver, etc etc). But when said supergroup is a [comparatively] underground metal band and will be taking their face-fucking music across the country in a dirty, sweaty, fart-filled van, the danger of fan disappointment is automatically diminished. With that in mind, put this lineup in your pipe and smoke it:

Dimitri Minakakis (ex-The Dillinger Escape Plan) – Vocals
John Adubato (ex-Burnt by the Sun) – Guitar
Brett Bamberger (East of the Wall, The Binary Code [touring]) – Bass
Dave Witte (Municipal Waste, ex-Burnt by the Sun, Discordance Axis, Circle of Animals, a million other bands) – Drums

Amirite? We’ve actually known about this project’s super-secret desert bunker jam sessions for some time but had to keep a lid on it while these dudes got their shit tight. The band, called Argonauts, will hopefully be bringing their show on the road very soon.

-VN