Alice Cooper used to be cool, but now he is lame. And if you disagree with me, you should keep in mind that his new album not only attempts to exploit fans’ nostalgia with the incredibly dumb title Welcome 2 My Nightmare, but opens with a song called “I am Made of You,” that utilizes a severe amount of vocoder:

Like Mr. Cooper, Tim Burton also used to be really cool, but is now lame. All of his post-Ed Wood work, in fact, can be summed up thusly:

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I don’t think I’ll ever be upset if a band I love starts getting more popular. Finally, they’re getting some recognition, and all the people I usually bug about the music I like can get some peace from me. Of course, there is a certain amount of smugness to “being there first,”  but what can you do? I try not to be too smarmy about it.

Insomnium is one such band. It’s no secret I enjoy my melodeath, but it seems so dismissive to label this band as such and leave it at that. I hesitate to describe their sound as anything but “haunting”  – the word could not be more apt. Seamlessly combining melancholic harmonies with harder solos, their music is just dark enough to offset the bittersweet lightness that pops up at unexpected intervals. Their newest album, One For Sorrow, marks their fifth release, and vocalist, bassist, and co-founder Niilo Sevänen was happy to talk about why they sound so sad.

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In honor of the Samhain season, MetalSucks is taking a fresh look at Danzig’s 11 most dubious distinctions. And we’re rendering judgment. (Click here for Part One: Misfortune. Click here for Part Two: Music.)

Danzig has had a helluva run,  but the Misfits is his one truly iconic band, from its enduringly popular graphics to its all-killer-no-filler catalog, which started as catchy punk songs and eventually influenced heavy metal at its highest levels.

The group’s sordid saga is one of rock’s great Behind The Music stories, but for today’s Defending Danzig discussion, let’s decide whether the Misfits achieved their full potential, or whether it’s just another shoulda-woulda-coulda band.

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For a hot minute Overkill were supposed to be on the currently-in-progress Anthrax/Testament/Death Angel tour, which would have made it the can’t-miss thrash tour of the year, instead of just being a can’t-miss thrash tour (’cause let’s be real, that line-up is still pretty sweet). Unfortunately, they dropped off that tour, and fortunately, it was to record a new album, which, of course, meant it was only a matter of time until they toured again.

Well, hey, guess what? They’re touring again! They’ll hit the road this spring with a bunch of bands of varying degrees of coolness — namely Belphegor, Aborted, Blackguard, System Divide, and Diamond Plate – acting as support. Maybe not quite as cool as seeing them with some other classic thrash bands, but certainly not at all shabby a line-up, either. And, like many of their old school thrash peers, Overkill have been experiencing a renaissance as of late — their last two albums, Immortalis and Ironbound, were both particularly swell. Hopefully the new release will be, too, and the tour will become that much cooler.

Here are dates, courtesy of Metal Injection:

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Crossover thrash historians know DYS, the Boston-based band whose self-titled second album remains essential listening for hardcore and metal fans alike. While the group’s initial run was short-lived, late last summer frontman Dave Smalley (Dag Nasty, Down by Law) and bassist Jonathan Anastas (Decadence, Slapshot) resurrected the name for a handful of gigs, one of which was recorded and released a few months ago for Bridge Nine Records. Now it appears that the new lineup, which includes Scream guitarist Franz Stahl, intend to keep the reunion going with a series of digital singles.

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Dear Nardwuar: please come work for MetalSucks. That is all.

-VN

“Remote control collapse / Respirators, leather, lead / Fate commanded on the rooftop,” grunts Vaulting vocalist Felix Kisseler in their new song “Biorobot.” “60 seconds to be dead.” That’s all the time this German tech-grind band needs to make its point about the deadly risks we take by continuing to operate nuclear power plants. Metal bands have been writing songs about the horrors of nuclear power for 30 years, and there’s still room for more: the album on which “Biorobot” appears, Nucleus, was recorded just one month before the Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant meltdown this past March.

The music that Vaulting writes these days is tight but splintered, with short outbursts of reckless grind colliding into chewy death metal. It’s Vaulting’s spasmodic songwriting, not their full-tilt force, that hits the hardest. It’s the musical equivalent of getting caught in five crossfires at once.

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OH MY GOD SERIOUSLY YOU GUYS WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS THIS DID SOMEONE PUT ACID IN MY COFFEE THIS MORNING BEC I CAN’T EVEN –

WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT

-AR

In news that will shock no one who follows him on Twitter (or enjoyed the slow-but-brutal grooves on The Infection, for that matter), Chimaira vocalist Mark Hunter likes to smoke weed. And, like so many of us who enjoy herbal refreshments, Hunter has now had a run-in with 5-0. Last night he was arrested in San Antonio for possession; as a result, he missed last night’s Chimaira show, and keyboardist/fellow marijuana afficionado Sean Z. filled-in on lead vocals again.

Hunter seems to be in surprisingly good spirits about the incident, though, if the tweets he’s been sending out since his release are any indication:

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Here’s a fun quote from a recent Sammy Hagar interview with Attention Deficit Delirium. Discussing the possibility of a reunion of the original Guns N’ Roses, Hagar says:

“They’ve proved it again and again and again that it ain’t [about] the money. They just don’t get along because Axl goes out for a lot less money with his version of Guns N’ Roses, and Slash goes out for a lot less money with Velvet Revolver or by himself. The amount of money they could make if they got it all back together, made a great record and toured the world would probably be as much as the Rolling Stones [get], and for them not to do it, it obviously ain’t about the money. Because they could do it. I would manage them. I’d be their manager and make sure they got the right deal from all the promoters. They could be the biggest band in the world if they wanted to.”

There’s three things I find funny about this statement:

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I’m going to put about as much as effort into this introduction as Herman Cain does to sounding sane and logical.

We begin today with Machine Head’s video for “Locust,” which, in case the giant red logo in the upper right hand corner didn’t tip you off, debuted on Metal Hammer‘s website. The video ain’t too bad. The performance footage could maybe use some more oomph and I wish the Cronerbergian portrayal of what I assume is a locust or a locust-man had more payoff. Also the final apocalyptic shot looks not-very-convincing. But otherwise the depiction of the swarm is pretty friggin’ metal, and the song certainly rocks.

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We had a lot of fun last year doing an NHL preview with our friends at Relapse Records – so much fun, in fact, that we wanted to do it again this year!

Unfortunately, we got a little distracted with some other business, and so this year’s edition is a) somewhat less comprehensive than last year’s, and b) not really a preview at all, seeing as the NHL season actually began two weeks ago. Still… we got some fun people weighing in, including members of Misery Index, Fuck the Facts, 16, and Hero Destroyed. Read ‘em all after the jump!

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Last week we gave away two copies of the brand new 5-CD UFO box set, The Chrysalis Years.

• Michael: “My Juggalo trap finally worked!”
• Gasputin: “Twig Destroyer.”

This week one lucky winner will receive a copy of Textures‘ excellent new record Dualism signed by all six of those crafty Dutchmen, along with any of the t-shirt designs you can see here in the size of your choice. You know the drill: leave a comment with the funniest caption to the photo below, submitted by MS reader Jason Solomon. Remember to use a real email address (or post it along with your comment if you’re using FB Connect / Twitter etc).

Before there were blogs there were these things called magazines, and the only metal magazine we still get excited about reading every month is Decibel. Here’s managing editor Andrew Bonazelli…

Three weeks ago we played a little hide the salami “Guess the Next Decibel HOF,” and “Mark” busted right out of the gates to correctly identify Tragedy’s self-titled debut. Like, for real, on the very first comment. One might assume Mark’s exploiting some inside info, but if you ain’t cheatin’, you ain’t trying, and since everyone here’s exhausted from fledgling fatherhood and binge-drinking, fuck it, he wins! We’ll be in touch regarding the subscription soon, dude.

The feature itself—conducted by Kevin Stewart-Panko with the whole band in the back room of an Indian buffet in Baltimore—is a slow-burner. Yannick Lorrain, Billy Davis and the Burdette brothers were originally reluctant to sit down and talk about their evolution from His Hero Is Gone, but once they got comfortable, the anecdotes started to ricochet in all directions, mirroring the adventurous chaos of Tragedy’s music. Was the album’s cover randomly pulled out of the trash at Kinko’s? Possibly. Did the band almost get curb-stomped by a cabal of neo-Nazis in Poland? Perhaps. Are they one of Portland’s last legitimately awesome exports before that city became a stronghold of sniveling pussy indie bullshit? Could be! Read all about ’em in the MegaDave issue.

-AB

The December 2011 issue of Decibel also features Municipal Waste, Animals as Leaders, Landmine Marathon, Hammers of Misfortune, and an awesome Goatwhore flexi disc, and can be ordered here. But why not just get a full subscription to ensure that you never miss one an issue?

The Inaugural Metal Suckfest is almost here!!!! Twenty bands will DESTROY The Gramercy Theatre on November 4 and 5, PLUS there’s an awesome, five-band pre-party at the venue the night before, making this THE can’t-miss hang of the year.

Tickets are on sale now right here, and you can hit up the fest’s official website for more info on the shows, including the complete line-up. In the meantime, we’re counting down to this weekend of chaos and debauchery by speaking to one member from each band on the bill. We continue today with guitarist/vocalist Paul Masvidal of Cynic, whose new EP, Carbon-Based Anatomy, comes out November 11 via Season of Mist (read our review here). And in case you didn’t know, Pal also sometimes blogs for MetalSucks, too!

Read our chat after the jump. And don’t forget to check back in the coming days and weeks for interviews with more of the musicians participating in this awesome event!!!

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The current drama in the Ratt camp that’s playing out through the media is nothing short of ridiculous, but we really shouldn’t be surprised; they’ve always conducted business this way! It’s part of how they operate, like how you know Axl Rose is always going to show up late to a concert or how an abusive husband is probably gonna repeat the same behavior over and over again despite what he promises. Eventually Pearcy, DeMartini, Blotzer and co. will kiss and make nice, after which they’ll inevitably hate each other even more and sink to even deeper lows via press mud-slinging. Hopefully they can record an album as unstoppably good as 2010′s Infestation in between.

The latest: Blotz referred to the way the rest of the band handles business as “a joke,” as if the very act of him saying that was somehow not apt to be included in his own statement (so meta!). The sleuths at Metal Insider then goaded Stephen Pearcy to react via Twitter:

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[UPDATE, 4:30pm EDT: As some of you pointed out, Cephalic Carnage have, in fact, dropped off this tour. -Ed.]

Hell fuckin’ yeah, bitches! We are proudly co-presenting death metal masters Exhumed’s North American headlining tour, which, just to make extra-extra-sure you attend, features the unfuckwithable support line-up of Goatwhore (seriously fuck you if you don’t worship Goatwhore), Cephalic Carnage (best Entire Catalog to Get Stoned To ever?), and Havok (one of the only modern thrash band that actually matters). The tour was supposed to begin last night in Gallup, NM, but now that show has been pushed back to the end of the trek; alas, tonight’s gig in Amarillo, TX has been cancelled altogether.

But the tour will officially fo’ realz kick-off tomorrow night in Oklahoma City!!! You can get all the dates on the newly-updated itinerary, plus links to purchase tickets, right here. DO NOT MISS THESE SHOWS! They are guaranteed to be completely brutal and completely unforgettable.

In honor of the Samhain season, MetalSucks is taking a fresh look at Danzig’s 11 most dubious distinctions. And we’re rendering judgment. (Click here for Part One: Misfortune.)

Danzig is, of course, a musician. In a perfect world, we wouldn’t have to debate whether he can fight or what kind of neighbor he is. Today, let’s look at the only thing that should matter: his art.

Over the course of 35 years, Danzig has topped the Billboard classical chart, written for country icon Johnny Cash, and penned a punk anthem that Guns N’ Roses covered. But rather than celebrate his diverse ability, contingents of diehard fans still heatedly debate the merits of his wide-ranging catalog.

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Hey, so, remember when Devin Townsend promised that, following the completion of all four albums in The Devin Townsend Project’s Ki/Addicted/Ghost/Deconstruction cycle, there would be a “monumental box set” containing “eight records plus a DVD?” Well, as you are most surely aware by now, all four albums have been completed and released — which means it’s time for the super-duper-awesome box set.

MetalSucks has exclusively obtained specs on the collection, which will be entitled Contain Us.  (Please note that the details outlined in the below document are not 100% final, but they’re pretty close — for example, there will actually be 5,000 copies worldwide, not 2,500 as the sheet says, and the vinyl featuring two exclusive tracks will be a 7″, not a 10″.) The so-incredible-sounding-it-has-us-drooling-already packaging was designed by Tom Bejgrowicz from manAlive Design; you probably already know Bejgrowicz from his work with God Forbid, Rolling Stone magazine, and the also-so-cool-it’s-silly coffin box set he designed for the Misfits. But, frankly, this new piece for Heavy Devy sounds like it’s gonna blow that Misfits thing right the hell out of the water.

Click on image of the specs below to enlarge, download, and get all the details for yourself, and start saving up for it now, because they are going to be limited edition, and you are definitely going to want one. Contain Us is scheduled for release later this very year! More details as we get ‘em!

The mighty mighty Rammstein are getting ready to release a greatest hits collection, Made In Germany 1995-2011, which will include a new single, as so many greatest hits collections do. And while the compilation itself does not yet have a release date, that new single, “Mein Land,” will be available on November 11, and now the cover art has been released.

And it’s fucking great. Just… fucking… great.

The band is also working on a video for the song, which will be released at the same time as the single; if their past videos are any indication, it will also be completely fucking amazing.

-AR

[via Metal Injection]