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What the fuck??

WELL, THAT’S ONE WAY TO HELP MAKES ENDS MEET: CHRIS BARNES APPEARS IN COMMERCIAL FOR USED CARS

 Thursday, November 10th, 2011 at 12:30pm by

So we all know that the music industry is not in such hot shape these days, and most musicians need to try and find ways to pay their bills that don’t involve making music. That’s why so many of the metal “stars” we all know and love also teach instrument lessons on the side, or produce or mix stuff for other bands, or tend bar, or work at the mall, or whatever. The economy is pretty shitty right now even if you’re not trying to make a living making racket about death and destruction, y’know?

And so while I am sympathetic to Chris Barnes’ plight, and I absolutely recognize his place in metal history, dear sweet Cannibal Corpse do I wish this was not real.

I mean, I guess it beats the shit out of having to do actual work to make a few extra bucks, but holy shit, I wonder if Barnes realizes that he is never, ever, ever, under any circumstances, going to live this down. Never ever ever.

Sigh.

-AR

[via Metal Injection]

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  • Baron VonVahstorik

    Those steel drums in the background really made this commercial a million times better.

  • the Shiny Seaturtle

    Axl, do you even look at what you type into the computer? There’s a typo in the title, man…

    • Black Metal Jacket

      Everyone’s a fucking editor.

      • bonerpatrol

        Seriously though, there are typos in every fucking article on this website. Now I know it’s a “blog” and it isn’t “real journalism” but as newspapers and magazines die out and websites like this become popular, this becomes a new type of journalism. As people feel grammar, spelling, and other cornerstones of the English language become less important because they see websites like this becoming popular without writing that’s well done, they start to think “well, what’s the point of all of this?” Basically, I think this bullshit lazy attitude when it comes to writing is shitty because it contributes to the dumbing down of America. But who gives a fuck, really.

        • Black Metal Jacket

          Everyone’s still a fucking editor.

        • Misterhustle24

          How many several times do you bet this guy looked his replies over for mistakes before posting them?

          • blackjustice

            “How many several times”

            lol

          • Misterhustle24

            Was that trollbait? Maybe…just maybe…

          • Black Hustler

            If you have to point it out, then, no, it wasn’t.

        • Ogre

          Shut up NERD!

        • Alexmonro83

           I phor un am sik ov al tha spelin miztaks on thiz cite.

        • Djangus Khan

          lighten up…go read the new york times for proper grammer

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1035713766 Dax Penick

    Good for him! To my knowledge ‘credibility’ has never put food on anyone’s table. Not to mention it’s a moving target and user defined.We all do the best we can and it really gets under my skin when people get on their soapbox about this kind of stuff.

    • Sludged Up Taco

      Lack of credibility will most certainly remove food from your table if you’re not careful. True, it is not fair to the one whose reputation is being placed under the microscope, but it comes with the territory. Especially if your image is one of a badass pot-smoking death metal freakazoid. Local used car shillman does not fit that prefabricated image. This will bite Chris Barnes in the ass, and rightfully so.

    • cougar party

      I agree.  While it’s definitely sort of lame, there is no money in making music anymore.  Being in a shitty local commercial to help[ provide for your family is probably more important to him than dealing with internet rage.

  • Justin Foley

    Axl - 

    There’s lots of bands doing car commercials these days.  Some do it on TV, some do it by partnering with car companies to put out records/play shows/release limited edition sneakers.

    = Justin

    • Anonymous

      *cough Scion*

  • Aaron

    It’s still not as embarrassing as Graveyard classics volumes 1, 2, and 3…

    • Anonymous

      Their cover of “TNT” was the first six feet under song I listened to and mildly enjoyed.

  • Blake

    I don’t see anything wrong with it. It’s not like he WORKS there, it’s just a testimonial from a well-known local musician. The death metal stuff was probably intentional comedy.

  • VerrucktsAl

    that was so cheesy, but not as bad as the hip hop magician

    • Vanilla

      I think you mean not as good as the hip hop magician. 

  • G0re0bsessed

    GAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Anonymous

    At least it wasn’t a fucking Hyundai.

  • http://twitter.com/Meemperor Matt P

    The funny thing is that he thinks a Prosche Boxster S is a fast car. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/ken.wilhelm Ken Wilhelm

      Explain why it isn’t Mr. Automotive Expert

  • Jaw666knee

    It’s better then sucking dick for crack money

  • Killmangore

    No one else thinks this is funny? Barnes is fucking awesome ha.

  • Dontemailme

    What isn’t he going to live down? Buying a Porsche? Idiots.

    • Donkeyfucker

      Used Porsche…

  • http://www.facebook.com/thatdamnedkid Brent Andersen

    If Chris really want to show us how fearless he is, he should get a Pinto.

    • Thrasher_blew

      or a tomahawk!!

  • TheHateMachine

    ATTENTION SLACKERS AT METALSUCKS: Blabbermouth just announced the end of Chimaira. Both guitar players are out now. 

  • Brandon

    Quit bitching. You would do the same thing for the money they probably paid him. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6zVUvmkyvA

    • Black Ops Fucker

      No. I wouldn’t.

    • Phylum Addict

      Way to include a video from a guy who claims it’s not selling out who also starred in Bad Boys II, Wrong Turn 2, and The Paul Reiser Show.

      • Az4g0th

        Dude, you missed the point… T.T

        Rollins is basically saying that you have to get paid somehow. In his IFC documentary series, he’s pretty open about how he’s taken roles that he didn’t like, but had to do so that he could eat. 

        • Phylum Addict

          Yes, he had to take those damn crappy roles in shitty movies because, Lord/Satan knows, there is absolutely no other way to make money. Gimme a fuckin’ break. The Paul Reiser Show aired this year!

          Point not missed. At all.

          • Adam

            I feel like he’d be selling out much worse if he actually worked a real job.

          • Alexmonro83

             So everyone that’s employed is a sellout? What if he worked for a charity or an orphanage?

  • d.o.g.o.b.g.y.n.

    “Here’s Chris Barnes and his dog Spot!”

  • Jeffuary

    I haven’t liked anything Barnes has put out in almost 15 years, but who freaking cares about this? Good for him. Also he looks in better shape than he did 10 years ago, so if must treating him ok. All you metal hipsters who care if anyone does anything remotely “mainstream” need to grow up.

    • Jeffuary

      *Life must be treating him ok.

  • Adam

    I instantly want to buy a new (used) car.

  • Eddievanclaylen

    I bet he did it for a better deal on the car and wasn’t paid anything for this. What’s wrong with that? I bet Barnes don’t give a fuck.

  • Shakt

    eaten back to life. that’s all i have to say.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Paul-Quinn/1197379400 Paul Quinn

    The steel drum while he gives the thumbs up. Moment of zen. 

  • Jason

    I think it is metal as fuck. You have to have giant balls to think that is a good idea. He must not give a shit and for that, he is metal.

  • Djangus Khan

    I’ve never actually heard him speak in a human voice… now that I have, he’s seems pretty cool

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Skylar-Rexwinkle/100000568030230 Skylar Rexwinkle

    The main question here is how much weed did Barnes get for doing this? He probably already had a car, you know all that man wants is more weed.

  • Thrasher_blew

    hey, he  not only got a porsche, he got paid to get a porsche, and everybody knows he got paid to get a porsche! It’s not as bad as all that! it’s only mildly degrading

  • TheHeavyMetalist

    Surpised no one has mentioned the giant balls it took for some used car salesman to rep six feet under in his ad…. That is cool…

  • RogerKilljoy

    Entrails ripped the front of a stylish 4 door sedan.

    • RogerKilljoy

      Entrails ripped *from* the front of a stylish 4 door sedan obviously

      • RogerKilljoy

        Entrails ripped *from* the front of a stylish *2* door sedan obviousl. I’m too high for this shit.

  • Bob273852

    Are you kidding me? This is fucking hilarious! Chris Barnes was already a joke. He’s the Rick Ta Life of death metal. Lighten up and enjoy.