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NEWT GINGRINCH SUFFERS TRAUMATIC ANAL DEVASTATION

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I know that some right-leaning readers hate it when we get all liberally here on MetalSucks. And you’re entitled to your opinion, obviously, and I hope we can all still be friends even if we don’t share ideologies. Also, I hope we can all at the very least agree that Newt Gingrich is a putz.

And I hope we can all agree that this is hilarious: last Thursday, a rally for the Republican Party nominee was disrupted by the local grindcore band Traumatic Anal Devastation, who according to Universe Number Five, “showed up outside the rally, plugged their instruments in, and generated what Gingrich staffer Terry ‘The Stick’ Foley called ‘the sound of a tank driving through a minefield.'” Vocalist Chip “Gravelthroat” Corbin later explained that the group’s moniker “is obviously metaphorical for the way the government and capitalism has continually raped the public at-large.” Sounds reasonable.

Needless to say, the cops showed up and pulled the plug on TAD’s political protest, but, y’know… gotta give ’em props for trying to make a point, however indecipherable the lyrics describing that point must have been.

-AR

Thanks to Nick for the tip!

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