FEAR, EMPTINESS, DECIBEL: CELEBRATE OPENING DAY WITH DECIBEL

Before there were blogs there were these things called magazines, and the only metal magazine we still get excited about reading every month is Decibel. Here’s managing editor Andrew Bonazelli…

So, there were two M’s/A’s games in Japan last week that nobody cared about (although King Felix vs. Yoenis was a sick early matchup), and yesterday the Marlins laid a gaudy, pastel Easter egg in their new avant-tard shithole. But today, friends, today is really and truly Opening Day in baseball, with a full slate of… seven games? Seven fucking games? God, Bud Selig is an idiot. Why can’t the powers that be let the whole country play hooky together, like the first round of March Madness?

Anyway, we all celebrate Opening Day in our own idiosyncratic ways. Decibel’s Editor-in-Chief is having a dentist appointment to simulate the agony of the right side of his team’s infield starting the year on the DL (after which everything will be diagnosed A-OK, to simulate his starting pitching). Decibel’s managing editor, yours truly, is wearing a shirtsey extolling the virtues of a likely golf course rapist. If you want to join in the “fun,” check out one of our many metal baseball previews. The tradition of gathering our favorite extreme musicians to brag/whine about their favorite teams began way back in issue 5 when our cover stars were just plain radi-cal. We’ve done it seven times since, with participants as diverse as Mike Patton, Scott Kelly, Geezer Butler, and actual ballplayers Pat Neshek and Jason Michaels. Relive the (for many of us) crushing funereal sadness.

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-AB

The May 2012 issue of Decibel, which also features Behemoth, a Baroness studio report, a Megadeth/Rust in Peace  Hall of Fame entry, and an awesome In Solitude flexi disc, can be ordered here. But why not just get a full subscription to ensure that you never miss an issue?