QUESTION OF THE WEEK: ACE OF BASS
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Hey, how many bass players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two: One to find a lightbulb, and one to find a guitarist to show them how! Ha! Wow what a savage burn on you bassists, third fiddles onstage and grease traps/cow-catchers offstage.
Okay but now let’s no more beat up on our diligent, diss-proof heavy metal four-stringers! Instead how ’bout we honor them with the same breathless esteem bestowed regularly on their glory-hogging, egomaniacal, overskilled six-string counterparts! Cool? Cool! It’s your MetalSucks Question Of The Week, in which our staff metalicians sound off on today’s hot issues in metal.
Fearless. Controversial. Half-baked. We give it to you straight every Friday afternoon. Straight to the poorly-lit spot beside the China cymbals. Here’s this week’s question:
Inspired by an esteemed guitar manufacturer’s best metal guitarist survey, we asked our staff the following:
According to fans of Gibson guitars, Tony Iommi is metal’s best guitarist. According to you, who is metal’s most valuable bassist?
Wat u think? The MS staff’s expert answers after the jump!
JUSTIN M. NORTON
Tag team: The correct answer is Mr. Geezer Butler.
Kvelertak bassist Marvin Nygaard, simply because he’s fun to watch on stage. He’s really tall and lanky, has neck tattoos and looks kinda goofy as his stringbean figure slouches over his low-slung Thunderbird bass. Also, sick bass swings, braj!
Alex Webster of Cannibal Corpse. An irreplaceable five-stringer and driving force behind death metal’s biggest band for their entire 25-year run, he’s also a key member of Ron Jarzombek’s excruciatingly technical Blotted Science. Webster’s skill is songwriting as well as technique, so his riffs are memorable and brutal.
Metal’s most amusing bassist? Steel Panther’s Lexxi Foxxx. Metal’s most fearless bassist? Magnus Osfelt of The Crown. The metal bass player whom I’d beg to attend my snuggle party? Smily Mike Inez of Alice In Chains. The author of metal bass riffs in which proficiency and snappiness best collide? Roger Patterson (RIP) of Atheist. But the most valuable bassist in metal, the genre’s keyest songwriter and most insistently un-overlookable sonic presence? Steve Harris, bossman of Iron Maiden and new first-time solo artist. ‘Arry ‘angs ‘uge.
Question: Is there a bassist whom we can not live without? I mean, look at …And Justice For All and its undetectable bass tracks: Would the super-classic album get better with bigger bass sounds? Did Metallica even need a bass player for their post-Burton eras? Is MetalSucks a haven for bass-racist jerks? Lay into us in the comments and have an awesome wknd!