Fear Emptiness Decibel

Fear, Emptiness, Decibel: Rejected Ideas for Decibel‘s 100th Issue

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Before there were blogs there were these things called magazines, and the only metal magazine we still get excited about reading every month is DecibelHere’s managing editor Andrew Bonazelli…

We’ve spent tons of time here and elsewhere making the world aware of Decibel’s 100th issue. It’s on newsstands and our webstore now, all gussied up with J. Bennett’s exclusive cover preview of the inevitably polarizing second Ghost album. The accompanying celebration show at Philly’s Union Transfer is officially sold out. But we still have one very massive and radical chunk of bonus fun to bestow upon you: Way back in July, because this is exactly the type of person he is, staffer Nick Green submitted 100 Ideas for Decibel #100 to yours truly and the EIC. We actually executed a few of these. As for the ones we punted on, I’m partial to #90.

1. Glow-in-the-dark cover
2. Oral history of Decibel Magazine
3. Bonus HOF feature (two in issue)
4. Mad Fold-In (whatever, it’s still a good idea)
5. Swedish death metal board game center spread
6. 100 Top 5 lists in page margins
7. Doom metal special
8. Photo spread spotlighting some of the best shots from the magazine’s first 100 issues
9. Attached cassette
10. One time return of mixtape column to spotlight 2004-2012
11. Mail-in offer for special holder for Decibel Flexis
12. Sludge metal special
13. Sheet music/tablature insert
14. Q&A with Axl Rose
15. Black metal Mad Libs
16. Album artist roundtable
17. Cardstock punch-out Immortal masks
18. Scratch and sniff cover
19. Slayer magazine #0 insert
20. Birthday/anniversary-themed flexi
21. Cutest Kitties in Metal, round two
22. Tunnel book cover
23. Feature on the making of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure
24. All musician reviews section
25. Top 20 extreme metal drummers feature
26. All red embossed “blood” cover
27. J. Bennett and John Darnielle pull a “Freaky Friday” and write each others’ columns
28. Mail-away offer for Decibot bobblehead
29. Streetwise: London
30. Nine Inch Nails, The Downward Spiral HOF
31. Top 40 of 1972-2012 (1 album per year)
32. Torche tour diary
33. Iron-on Decibel patch for jean jackets
34. 25-year flashback—entire issue written and designed as though it came out in 1987
35. Feature on Japanoise
36. Sheet of heavy metal related colorforms
37. Animation cel/lithograph from Metalocalypse
38. Bruno illustrates every Upfront feature in lieu of photos
39. Persekutor flexi disc
40. Post-metal special
41. Label sponsored contest to win “ultimate metal collection”
42. Amy Gallick: Reader of the Month
43. All-black cover. None more black!
44. Top 20 extreme metal bass players
45. Feature on cooking, drinking and gastronomy
46. Limited edition Isis live CD in sleeve
47. Q&A with Doro Pesch
48. Full page “Sunday” Stone Cold Lazy strip
49. Insert of Wacky Packages-style stickers mocking famous album covers
50. Progressive metal special
51. Guest Editors: The Decibel Forum
52. Cut ‘n’ paste zine layout
53. All band photos in issue are posed in exactly the same way
54. Headshot of artist on cover with mouth wide open; space in mouth is cut out for “glory hole”
55. Jeff Walker’s column returns to answer all mail he has received for the last five years (i.e., none)
56. Mookie Singerman cameos in Kevin Sharp’s column
57. Industrial special
58. Metallic ink cover
59. Tear-away insert of temporary tattoos
60. Adem Tepedelen challenges Dave Witte to drinking contest in Brewtal Truth column
61. Flexi disc with 100 different covers of “You Suffer”
62. Triple gatefold cover
63. Choosing Death: The Final Chapter
64. Feature on metal bands with animal members
65. Hardcore special
66. Crossover with Magnet Magazine
67. Albert Mudrian mixes his own blood into ink at printing plant
68. Every Decibel year-end list dissected, defended and/or revised
69. Highlights Magazine style puzzle page with two pictures of Norwegian black metal dudes burning churches, where readers have to spot all of the differences
70. Feature on The Decline of Western Civilization trilogy, Wayne’s World, Penelope Spheeris
71. Cardstock back cover that folds into metal-themed paper toy
72. Feature on burgeoning metal scene in India
73. Flipbook that spans bottom corner of all pages designed by Tom Neely
74. J. Bennett writes entire issue
75. Q&A with Sebastian Bach
76. Guest reviews section: Buddyhead
77. Feature on makeup, corpsepaint and Grand Guignol theatrics
78. All white cover with hand-drawn illustrations by Bruno and Mark Rudolph
79. Power metal special
80. Metal Muthas: Albert’s mom
81. Hottest Doodz in Metal, round 2
82. Extreme MMA preview
83. Feature on extreme metal tattoo artists
84. Round table discussion with every host of Headbangers Ball
85. Q&A with Chris Holmes
86. Decibel bumper sticker insert
87. Gothic metal special
88. Steve Albini essay
89. The Worst of Decibel: A retrospective of the harshest reviews
90. Limp Bizkit, Significant Other HOF
91. Contest to win OOP Decibel issues (if any are still left)
92. Entire issue is done in style of Hit Parader, Circus and Rip
93. Mountain Goats flexi
94. Streetwise: Montreal
95. Invisible ink cover
96. Feature on backmasking and hidden tracks on metal records
97. DIY feature on running your own record label
98. Where Are They Now: Decibel Interns
99. Top 20 metal documentaries
100. Contest to win Bazillion Points library

Decibel’s 100th issue is on sale now right here! But why not just get a full subscription to ensure that you never miss an issue?

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