Everyone's Replaceable

Earache Records Drops White Wizzard, Guitarist Explains the Truth Behind the Bag Stealing Incident

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White Wizzard dunzo

The ongoing White Wizzard drama that’s taken up valuable space on this website over the past five years could all be a big, extravagant publicity stunt. I doubt it is, but it could be, and Jon Leon and his stinky farts are laughing all the way to the… oh wait, nevermind. But even if it’s not some elaborate hoax haven’t we still given this band so much publicity over what basically amounts to a soap opera? Oh right, this is MetalSucks, of course we have. It’s a bad car wreck on the highway, and I just can’t help but slow down to rubberneck every time.

And so: Guitarist Will Wallner  has issued the following statement exclusively to MetalSucks in an effort to clear the name of ex-vocalist Joseph Michael, accused of stealing a fan’s bag:

After the first gig in Brighton a 17 year old girl was drunk and left her bag in our merch box. When we found it we were already in the next city. So we waited until we got back to London to return it, which we did. Joseph never stole anything, it was a total accident and actually her own fault. He actually made sure the bag was kept safe the whole tour, that’s why it was in his possession.

Of course Jon Leon has a different version of things. Via the White Wizzard Facebook:

Want to thank the fans that got Joseph Michael to return Charlotte Croucher’s bag he stole to our guitarist before he left london. The public pressure worked. The guy was caught and then hid it and was not going to return it….funny how some fan pressure changed the game fast. I am sure she will post a further update………you guys all rule.

How could two versions of the same story be so different??? I’d be inclined to be confused, except that Leon has had so many problems with ex-band members that it’s incredibly hard for me to take his stance seriously. There’s no way I can really know, but if I were a betting man.

Oh, and hey, remember how that guy Giles someone or other was going to fill in on vocals for the rest of the tour? Not happening — the tour has now been canceled altogether. At least Leon has some shred of self awareness:

“If we do not get famous for our music, we will for sure get famous for our ridiculousness”

Touché.

But wait, there’s more! Apparently Earache Records has finally decided to sever ties with this train wreck of a band. Posted earlier this morning, again via Facebook:

Excited to announce that we will be going independent and we have mutually parted company with Earache records. We wish them the best. This has been a decision made before the tour over the past couple of months. I appreciate the initial interest in White Wizzard and hope other bands that are with them do well. I am currently in the process of forming my own record label which shall be called White Wizzard records. I plan to form a couple of other projects next year. The guys in the band will now have an actual vested interest in making some $ from album sales and our merchandise which is fantastic. I will be releasing a blog soon with some advice on record labels and how I think most bands should avoid that road and the pros and cons. One silver lining is we have had some great singers come forward with interest and I think we should be announcing someone within a few days, and I wrote a song I am excited about yesterday and am about to get on a writing tear I believe. While guys that have been fired by me that have an agenda will continue to spew nonsense and lies trying to stir the pot and hurt the band, I will continue to write songs and put out music. We will not keep the shit flying back and forth. We will just wish them well and get on with it. I know the music is what counts and it is why I got into this, not for the dumb shit.The fans do not want to hear the crap, they want to hear good songs. In the end the truth is on our side and our intentions are nothing more than to make great music. Here is to a positive outlook in the coming months.

Surprised it took Earache so long to finally throw in the towel. I sincerely hope this “mutual” parting of ways does not impact all the lulz this band generates for MetalSucks readers on a regular basis.

If you want to experience some true laughter this morning, check out “My Advice on Dealing with Record Labels for New Bands” by Jon Leon. It uses big words like “capital” and “invest” and “recoup.” lololololol

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