Nick Hipa Condemns Tim Lambesis’ “Appalling Agenda to Further Damage the Lives and Reputations of His Non-Supporters”
In case you missed it: AP recently scored the first interview with Tim Lambesis since his arrest last year (and, as it turns out, the last interview with Tim Lambesis before his sentencing last week). It’s a long interview (as you’d expect it to be — there’s a lot to ask Lambesis) and an excellent read, if for no other reason than because it’s been our only real chance to hear Lambesis’ side of the story.
Still, there are parts where Lambesis provides answers that should give any rational reader pause. Like when Lambesis opines about his As I Lay Dying bandmates:
“Jordan [Mancino, drummer] did return my phone call. The other [band] guys didn’t return my calls when I first came home. I eventually did speak with Nick [Hipa, guitarist], really briefly. I mean, really briefly. In both cases, we never got to the details. I thought they were establishing communication, as if we’d eventually be able to talk about all of these things. But then it was almost like there was some sort of group thinking going on. It was like they all decided, collectively, not to talk to me. They cut off all communication. I sent a very long, very formal apology to all of them, trying to make amends, acknowledging how heavily my actions had impacted their lives. I got no response, so I sent another one out.
“In the second one, I was just like, ‘Look, I know I don’t deserve forgiveness. But I just want to begin this process…’ I got really brief responses from Nick and Jordan, acknowledging they had received it. Jordan said everybody just needed more time and that I was kind of hassling them, like, ‘leave us alone.’ So I just stopped bothering them. The last email I sent was just like, ‘Guys, I’m not looking for a business opportunity, or to make everything okay so we can make more records together. I just considered you guys friends for a long time…’ I just wanted to reach out on a friendship level. What I really needed during this difficult time were my friends. I thought they just needed more time. These emails were spread out. The last one was like nine months after I was arrested.”
“People choose their friends. They were in a band with me because I was a meal ticket. It was an opportunity for them to make a good income. We were business partners. They made it clear there’s no concern for me on a personal level. And that’s actually okay. The person I was wasn’t somebody worth being concerned about, to be honest. The person I was in the last six months or so before my arrest, I wouldn’t be friends with that person. I don’t take it personally. But it doesn’t make it any less sad. It’s sad to think of all that time put into those relationships and now there’s no personal concern, no friendship.”
And honestly, I found these statements to be pretty, well… nuts. Assuming anything Lambesis says is even true… how could he possibly be confused about anyone distancing themselves from him after he was arrested for attempted murder? How can he be so casual about such a heinous crime? Why isn’t his reaction not “My friends abandoned me,” but, rather, “I really screwed over my friends with my awful behavior”? I mean, it’s not like he got picked up for shoplifting or something. He tried to extinguish a life, and he got caught red-handed. That shit is CRAZY, man! That he ever thought for a moment that AILD might go on after what he did suggests that Lambesis has completely lost touch with reality.
Now Hipa has responded to Lambesis’ comments via his own Facebook page; you can read that response below. Again, it’s long, but worth the read… but if you can’t hang, the gist of it, “Lambesis is full of shit.” Which is not hard to believe at this point.
Here is Hipa’s retort:
“Last Friday I sat in a courtroom to support a friend. For the better part of a decade our professional and personal lives were woven in a relationship akin to family. As if family, the intention of my attendance was to publicly acknowledge the deep care and compassion I hold for this individual.
“I watched as she searched for the strength to behold her transgressor for the first time in over a year since learning of his plot to have her murdered. I listened to her describe the love she once possessed for this man whom she adored, trusted, and depended on as her husband. I followed along as she detailed his abandonment of her and her children; a betrayal he failed to own but opted to blame on a lost sense of morality. This excuse became further excused by a defense that drug abuse had clouded his judgement.
“She attempted to rebuild a life with three young children apart from a man who viewed them as disposable. The strength and resilience of these children—whom she saved from abandonment, poverty, and certain early death—were being further challenged by this domestic unravelling. Her desire was to give them love and stability, his response was to have her executed.
“I observed his defense acknowledge the crime but defend it once again with the argument that steroids created mental instability. I followed as the prosecution reminded the court of an intricately calculated series of actions occurring over the course of many weeks. A scheme which involved using her children to secure gate codes for a would be assassin, and his plans for their further exploitation as an alibi; a plot indicative of careful premeditation over momentary mindlessness.
“I watched as a Judge highlighted how many men use steroids but do not plot to murder innocent women, and for someone to move towards such action reveals something twisted within their character. He continued to point out that a willingness to involve children in such matters is deeply disturbing and reprehensible as well.
“The accounts I interpreted within this courtroom were details of people and a past that I had known and observed first hand. All and everything was as I knew it to be.
“I share this in response to an interview between Tim Lambesis and Ryan J. Downey that was released on AltPress.com moments after this women and her family were given their closure. Behind the facade of a penitent man with renewed outlook, restored faith, and apparent remorse is a fairly appalling agenda to further damage the lives and reputations of his non-supporters. It is the continued defense of behavior that leveled every facet of an innocent woman’s being and traumatized children who have already persevered through the actual pain of an orphan’s life.
“There is no contrition in his pseudo-philosophical jargon, and the verbalized assessment of his relationship with myself and former bandmates is absolute slander. I had spoken with him directly and in length of how 100% of my heart, love, and loyalty was being directed in support towards his victims. These victims being people I had opened my heart to as family for many years and whom I pray will find healing from his deep abuse. In complete disregard for the truth as I’m certain he understands it, he opted to fabricate motives that describe us abandoning him as a callous business decision.
“The intent of his defamation is to create an air of sympathy and support under the false pretense of a forthcoming tell-all. Unfortunately this has worked to a degree, as many strangers have put effort into projecting hatred towards those of us who chose to defend the guiltless subjects of his crimes.
“It is regrettable that he utilized this platform as a means to justify his conduct. The prosecution of this case profiled him as a sociopathic narcissist in definite need of rehabilitation. For those of us who truly know the man for who he is, it’s shameful that in spite of all he is still as he ever was and just as they say.
“For Jordan, Phil, Josh, and myself, we’ll continue to carry on knowing we behaved honorably, lovingly, and loyally to the individuals who truly needed it.”
I can’t really imagine any rational person doubting or disagreeing with a word of Hipa’s statement. Tim Lambesis’ approach to this entire debacle has been to treat it the way a rockstar would treat getting out of rehab — “Yeah, I did something terrible, but I’m a good person, and I’m gonna come out the other side of this an even better person.” But what Lambesis did is so incredibly fucked-up… I dunno, man. I find his whole attitude towards his crime insanely disturbing.
Discuss in the comments section below.
[via The PRP]