Black Collar Workers

Attila’s Chris Fronzak Thinks You, Too, Can Be A Millionaire!

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fronzAttila frontman Chris Fronzak isn’t just a guy uses ‘faggot’ too much, he’s a millionaire. And according to The PRP, he’s going to teach you how to be one this summer.

Apparently, Fronzak will host a series of entrepreneurial workshops on this year’s Vans Warped Tour. Fronzak issued the following quote:

“I love teaching because I believe that all knowledge should be shared with everyone, especially those willing to learn. I’ve been through a lot of ups & downs in life and I feel as if I can help give back by teaching these classes.”

Right. You can learned more about the workshops here, where it also mentions that Fronzak started his first business at age 10 by “selling slightly-used golf balls to people in his community.” Which sounds a lot like “breaking into the local country club and diving into the water traps for balls that weren’t too fucked up,” but whatever.

Here’s the thing: love him or hate him (or utterly fucking despise him), Fronzak is 25 years old, and if he does have the money he claims to have, then he’s doing something right. So if you’re one of the few people who is attending Warped Tour, trying to start your own business, and not actively disgusted by Attila, then you might want to check this workshop out. Worst thing that happens, you get some blog fodder out of it.

The real question is, will The Fronz teach us how to write an entire band’s catalog about a homophobic victimization complex? Inquiring minds want to know!

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