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In Flames and Hellyeah Announce Co-Headlining Tour of North America

  • Axl Rosenberg
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My local Ikea — and, I assume, most, if not all, Ikeas — has these cages outside the store. The purposes of these cages is to have someplace safe to store your purchases while you go grab your car out of the lot and pull it up to the curb, thereby saving yourself the trouble of schlepping anything heavy very far. It’s a nice idea…

…mostly. See, these cages also have a sign on them, and that sign looks like this:

Verboden_zwangeren

Yes, someone deemed it necessary to include a sign instructing shoppers not to store their baby in the cage. In my imagination, the sign is there because it has to be, because once upon a time some idiot did, in fact, leave an infant in the cage. It’s just as possible, however, that some Swedish executive at Ikea Corporate Headquarters was basically like, “Hey, Americans are pretty stupid, we’d better make sure these morons know not to cage their children.”

Either way, the Ikea Baby Cage dynamic will be re-created in audio form this autumn. That’s when In Flames, metal’s affordable-yet-classy, easy-to-put-together Swedish outfit will co-headling a tour with Hellyeah, metal’s band for stupid Americans who leave their babies in cages.

Find out where you can leave your baby in a cage below, courtesy of Lambgoat. Support will be provided by From Ashes to New and Source.

11/14 Silver Spring, MD @ The Fillmore
11/15 Pittsburgh, PA @ Stage AE
11/16 New York, NY @ PlayStation Theater
11/18 Binghamton, NY @ Magic City Music Hall
11/19 New Haven, CT @ College Street Music Hall
11/20 Boston, MA @ House of Blues
11/22 Montreal, QC @ Metropolis
11/23 Toronto, ON @ Danforth Music Hall
11/25 Detroit, MI @ The Crofoot
11/26 Fort Wayne, IN @ The Hub
11/27 Cleveland, OH @ Agora Theater
11/29 Cincinnati, OH @ Bogarts
11/30 Chicago, IL @ House of Blues
12/1 Kalamazoo, MI @ State Theater
12/3 Saint Paul, MN @ Myth Live Event Center
12/4 Green Bay, WI @ The Sandlot
12/6 Lincoln, NE @ Bourbon Theatre
12/7 Denver, CO @ Summit Music Hall
12/9 Los Angeles, CA @ Belasco Theater
12/10 Chico, CA @ Senator Theater
12/11 San Francisco, CA @ The Regency Ballroom
12/13 Seattle, WA @ Showbox Sodo
12/14 Vancouver, BC @ Commodore Ballroom
12/16 Edmonton, AB @ Union Hall
12/17 Calgary, AB @ MacEwan Hall
12/18 Spokane, WA @ Knitting Factory Concert House
12/19 Portland, OR @ Roseland Theater

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