Shit That Comes Out Today: March 24, 2017

Howdy howdy, MetalSucksers. Anso DF is currently on sabbatical from the MetalSucks mansion so until he returns, I’ll be writing your satanic bible of all the week’s notable releases. Now I don’t ever remember agreeing to do this — it’s surely the result of some Neilstein black magic fuckery — but nonetheless, he has a signed contract and if I want my Jack Daniel’s privileges in the MS Mansion back, it looks like I have to do this. So, here is some shit that comes out this week.

Northlane
Mesmer (UNFD)
On a playlist with: Periphery, Volumes, Intervals
Listen Mesmer full stream (here)

Something on this list had to djent, right? Right. Although this album technically came out yesterday, the band dropped it completely by surprise and as such, it warrants a mention here. I don’t like djent all that much, but Northlane stand out: their music has more to it than just chugging an open note in random patterns. Northlane are also another one of those special bands whose high-pitched, clean vocals don’t drive me completely fucking insane, so they get points there, too. So if you need something slightly djenty and incredibly easy to listen to, you’re going to want to get your hands on Mesmer.

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Pallbearer
Heartless (Profound Lore)
On a playlist with: Wishbone Ash, Grateful Dead, The Band
Listen I Saw The End (here) Review (here)

I’m from Missouri and sharing a border with Arkansas is a lot like having an appendix — you’re not sure what purpose it serves and most of the time you forget that it exists. So it never ceases to amaze me that in a state where seemingly no one owns shoes, Pallbearer have a metaphorical pair of Air Force 1s. Pallbearer recorded Heartless completely to analog tape and the touch just feels, well, right for this album. Heartless has plenty of new ideas put to good use, and if you liked their previous release, Foundations of Burden, then you’ll like Heartless even more.

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Me And That Man
Songs of Love and Death (Cooking Vinyl)
On a playlist with: Johnny Cash, Nick Cave, Leonard Cohen
Listen “Cross My Heart And Hope To Die” (here)

For anyone familiar with Behemoth, frontman Adam ” Nergal” Darsky’s country/folk project could not be any farther off from what you’d expect from the guy who wrote The Satanist. Although the subject matter is mostly the same — black churches, devil stuff and the like — hearing Nergal deliver it in a much more calm and melancholy manner is eerily soothing. This is easily music that you could play to fool someone who thinks metal is evil. Then, if they like it, play Behemoth and laugh and laugh and laugh.

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Cut Up
Wherever They May Rot (Metal Blade)
On a playlist with: Aborted, Cannibal Corpse, Dying Fetus
Listen “Form Ear To Ear” (here)

I sincerely hope that you’ve been hitting the gym before you put this album on because god al-fucking-mighty is it heavy. This is some sweet, sweet Swedish death metal that once again reminds us all that the Scandinavian countries take an enormous, stinking shit on the rest of the world when it comes to metal. If you like being bludgeoned to death in an auditory manner just like I do, then you’ll love this album. The shouted vocals give Cut Up a hardcore feel and there are even certain elements of deathcore to be found. This release is a must-have for any death metal fan, just make sure you do some squats before you try to pick this bad boy up.

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Steel Panther
Lower The Bar (Open E)
On a playlist with: Motley Crue, Poison, Whitesnake
Listen “Anything Goes” (here)

Does the most relevant glam band in the world need an introduction? No, no they don’t because metal’s hardest partiers and fiercest pussy slayers are back to bang your girlfriend, mom and sister backstage yet again. If nothing else, Steel Panther have been consistent with their releases over the years. They’re the epitome of what 80s rock wanted to be through the sound of their music, and through single-handedly supporting the hair spray industry.

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OTHER SHIT THAT COMES OUT TODAY

Anthrax For All Kings 7-Inch Box Set (Megaforce) listen
Art Of Anarchy The Madness (Century Media) listen
Blood Divisions Cardinal One EP (Metal Blade) listen
Cokegoat Drugs And Animals (Vinyl) (The Path Less Traveled) listen
Craving Strange Careful Of The Landmines (MRI) listen
Creeper Eternity In Your Arms (Roadrunner Records) listen
Damnations Day A World Awakens (Sensory) listen
Dark Tranquillity The Absolute (7″)(Century Media) listen
Davey Suicide Made From Fire (Trisol) listen
Dying Fetus Descend Into Depravity (Vinyl) (Relapse) listen
Dying Fetus Destroy The Opposition (Vinyl) (Relapse) listen
Dying Fetus Reign Supreme (Vinyl) (Relapse) listen
Dying Fetus Stop At Nothing (Vinyl) (Relapse) listen
Dying Fetus War Of Attrition (Vinyl)(Relapse) listen
Eclipse Momentum (Frontiers) listen
Fucked Up Year Of The Snake (Tankcrimes) listen
Gorgoroth Destroyer (Reissue) (Soulseller) listen
House Of Lords Saint Of The Lost Souls (Frontiers) listen
Memoriam For The Fallen (Nuclear Blast) listen
Nails You Will Never Be One Of Us (Cassette)(Nuclear Blast Entertainment) listen
Night Ranger Don’t Let Up (Frontiers) listen
One Desire One Desire (Frontiers Records) listen
Season Of Arrows Give It To The Mountain (Argonauta) listen
Sloth Herder No Pity, No Sunrise (Grimoire Records) listen
Slugdge The Cosmic Cornucopia (Willowtip) listen
Today Is The Day Temple Of The Morning Star: 20th Anniversary Deluxe Edition (The End) listen