What Corey Taylor Thinks™ (October 16, 2018): Corey’s Endorsement for the U.S. Elections, His Non-Appearance in a Metallica Video and More!
You, loyal MetalSucks reader, yearn to know everything there is to know about Slipknot and What Corey Taylor thinks™. We, indomitable journalists and expert click harvesters, strive to get you the hard-hitting answers you deserve! Since the only content that gets traffic on this site nowadays is anything Slipknot or Corey Taylor related, we hereby present to you our new daily column What Corey Taylor Thinks™, the subject matter of which is self-explanatory!
Did Slipknot or Corey Taylor do or say anything over the past day? Yes!
The upshot: Clown is giving guided tours of Slipknot-specific locations in Des Moines for $125 as part of a VIP package that’s connected to the Slipknot-themed haunted house, and one of the destinations is Guitar Center.
Clickability rating: 6/10, this whole Slipknot-themed haunted house thing has proven less juicy than we anticipated.
Nonsensical Clown rant: Guaranteed. Can you imagine being trapped on a tour bus with Clown at the mic for an hour or two? He might relay his own theory of interplanetary relativity, whatever that is.
What does Corey Taylor think?: It is presently unknown what Corey Taylor thinks about this haunted house or whether he shopped at the specific Guitar Center location in question as a wee one, although the idea of Little Corey furtively perusing SM-57s is titillating.
Will Sid Wilson be one of the members of the band giving VIP haunted house tours? Who the fuck cares?
Corey Taylor Does Not Appear in This Metallica Performance of “Dyer’s Eve” from 2004 #CoreyTaylor #Metallica #Slipknot #VeryImportant
The upshot: Metallica released a live video of “Dyer’s Eve” from 2004 that does not have Corey Taylor in it.
Clickability rating: 9/10, having Metallica and Slipknot referenced in the same post is gold. Only way it could’ve been better is if someone died.
What does James Hetfield think?: Unclear, but a representative from Metallica’s team told us Papa Het was too busy hunting bears to answer.
What does Corey Taylor think?: Probably really annoyed that we included him in this headline if he even happened to see it.
Status of Robert Trujillo’s pony-braids: As rockin’ as ever.
We Asked Corey Taylor About His Endorsements for the 2018 U.S. Midterm Elections
The upshot: Since Taylor Swift motivated 65,000 people to register to vote with just one post — and Corey has been vocal about his politics in the past — we tweeted at him and encouraged him to motivate his fans.
Did Corey respond? No.
How many social followers does Corey Taylor have? 1.1 million on Instagram and 568k on Twitter. That’s nothing compared to Swift’s 112 million and 84 million (respectively), but still, it’s a helluva lot!
Who does Corey Taylor endorse? We’re guessing whatever Democrats are running in his district, and probably Beto O’Rourke because duh. We would like to know more.
What does Corey Taylor think? We wish we knew. He hasn’t posted on Instagram for an entire week! We need updates!
Hey @CoreyTaylorRock, who do you endorse in the upcoming midterm elections? If the other Taylor (Swift) can drive 65,000 voter registrations with a single post, let's see how many you can drive. Would be so cool to see you continue to take a stand.
— MetalSucks (@metalsucks) October 16, 2018
We’ll be back tomorrow with a fresh, new edition of What Corey Taylor Thinks™! Toodaloo!