MetalSucks

The fine lads and ladesses over at Roadrunner Records have compiled a list of the Top 50 greatest metal frontmen of all-time for you, me and everyone to endlessly argue over (like, seriously: we still get comments on a daily basis on our ages-old posts about Metal Hammer’s Best Death Metal Songs of All Time list and Rolling Stone’s Best Guitarists of All Time list.) What’s interesting about Roadrunner’s list is that in the interest of journalistic integrity all Roadrunnner Records artists have been excluded from the list. How ’bout them apples? The editors of the list also took care to point out that this is a list of the greatest “front-men,” not “singers,” an apt distinction indeed.

After the jump, Roadrunner’s entire list. Followed by your comments.

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I haven’t read an issue of Metal Hammer since 2006, when they did that awesome Kerry King bloodpack cover for the 20th anniversary of Reign in Blood. It’s not that I don’t like Metal Hammer – it’s just that there’s no American version, and, honestly, it’s kinda costly to buy imported magazines. But my point is this: I’m not really in any position to talk about the state of Metal Hammer as a whole. I can’t tell you that’s it great or that it sucks, because it’s been three years since I purchased an issue.

I mention this because the magazine’s German edition just did a reader’s poll to determine the best death metal songs of all time, and I find the list kinda weird. I love Arch Enemy and think “We Will Rise” is about as good a melodeath anthem as we’ve had thus far in the 21st century, but is it better than songs by Carcass, At the Gates, or Opeth? What am I to make of a list that puts Job for a Cowboy and All Shall Perish above Suffocation?

See the complete list (along with the voting percentages) after the jump. Of course it’s entirely possible that some douche bags just kept voting over and over, thereby tipping the scales, but, still, I thought it was worth having a good ol’ fashioned debate over.

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We can’t listen to metal all the time, but whatwith the massive amount of CDs and press packs we receive it’s hard to find time to get to anything else. Usually if I’m not listening to metal it’s ’70s soul/r&b/funk with some classic reggae or dub thrown in for the more “festive” occasions, but there were a few non-metal records releases in 2008 that snuck their way into my iPod rotation this year. (And if you missed it… check out all of the MetalSucks staffers’ picks for Best Metal Albums of 2008).

My picks, after the fold…

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Yesterday was a fun day at the MS Mansion; with our Top 10 lists all handed in ahead of time, we let the MS Mansion Monkeys run the show whilst we watched you guys duke it out in the comments (”no ________?????? wtf???? you guyz are suxorz i’m never coming here again!!”) If you missed the fun, be sure to take a look at the Top 10 lists of your favorite metal blogger douchebags.

Anyway, we thought it’d be fun if we kept a tally of the nominations on said lists as well as the ridiculous shit that went down here yesterday while the MSM Monkeys flung poo at each other. Our list of lists, after the jump.

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It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. And what difference does it make, really? It’s just a matter of personal taste, and we’re all gonna die and be forgotten anyway.

So enough with the horseshit. Here’s what I spent my year listening to:

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2008 was a fine fucking year in metal if you ask me. There was such an abundance of quality, new metal at our disposal all year long that I found myself constantly struggling to balance keeping up with it all and still finding time to, ya know, rock out to the good shit and properly enjoy it. Not a bad problem to have.

In preparation for compiling this list, I did my best to go back and listen to every one of these to re-assess their potential awesomeness. And I’m glad I did; while some albums held onto their charm or even ripened with age, others didn’t seem quite so special a few months on.

Enough already; here’s my list.

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In my admittedly arrogant opinion, this was a year of extremes in the post/prog-rock/metal scene-o-verse. On one hand, there were several technically dazzling, inhumanly sickening feats of musical fury…and chillin’ at other end of the aggro-spectrum, we’ve seen a sizeable chunk of more straightforwardly-structured (as far as can be in the prog-anything world), super-solidly played and recorded achievements in the realm of upper-eschelon songwriting. I have been rather impressed across the board — so many killer bands really stepped it up a notch and made this an amazing year of powerful new music.

Holler.

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The year in metal had plenty of bad and good in it, as does every year. While hipsters tried to co-opt black metal and death metal became something for Hatebreed fans to devour, as a whole, metal proved itself as still vital, perhaps one of the only outlets those disgusted with iPod-commercial indie rock and auto-tuned hip hop could escape to. In a year almost more plastic and contrived than others, metal’s best paid little attention to convention and trend, instead focusing on the unrelenting. It was a breath of fresh air before returning to the land of The Hills, Sarah Palin, and yet another Britney Spears comeback. There was plenty to be angry about in 2008; in fact, most of it was a cause for anger. Though maybe a good-not-great year for it, metal was still a vital commodity for those wishing to look past Deerhunter, She and Him, or TV on the Radio to something a little more… interesting. My top 10 for the year?

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1. Nachtmystium – Assassins: Black Meddle Part 1

This was a masterpiece from the very first time it came out of the shrink-wrap and spun in my buddy’s car to right now when I can’t go a week without listening to the “Seasick” trilogy. From a combination of the growing maturity of the band and zealous label support this is an innovative piece of music that will stand as the new watermark for the possibilities of black metal. Assassins was an honest, organic approach at musical experimentation that became both a loving tribute to the heroic Pink Floyd and a ballsy transcendence of closed-minded scene thinking. The wide accessibility of the new Nachtmystium sound shows that they can only increase in popularity and esteem in the metal community and beyond it. My prediction is that by the time they’re ready to meddle again, everyone will know who the true kings of American black metal are.

Best Tracks: “Ghosts of Grace,” “Seasick” Parts 1 – 3

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‘Cause sometimes, we like to watch shit, too. Click to read more…

In many ways, 2008 will be seen as The Year of the Old Fart. Of course, the big names that will be propped up by those who are blissfully unaware will be the longtime standard-bearers who shook off the dirt from their nearly submerged coffins: Metallica, AC/DC, and Guns ‘N Roses. A closer look, however, reveals something much more fascinating. The Robert Downey Jr.-like resurrection of such Old Fart acts as Testament and Metal Church. These old-timers cranked out two of the best albums of the year that respectfully looked back on their storied histories whilst always keeping an eye on the future. Throw in fellow Old Fart Pink Metallers Enslaved and their genre-stretching side project Trinacria; plus, several bands who have chosen their influences well, namely Quicksand, Voi Vod, and P.J. Harvey, and you come up with truly one of the better off-the-mainstream-radar years in metal in a long time. Not to mention that the ultimate Old Fart tour, Masters of Metal, which featured the aforementioned Testament, Motorhead, Heaven and Hell (Black Dio), and Judas Priest, blew away the other so-called quality metal package tours. Now to the Top 10 albums of 2008. My criteria is probably different than the majority of you MetalSucks Maniacs. I don’t give a rat’s ass about album sales, media attention, or hipster quotient. No, my criteria is much simpler. Will it make me want to play Grand Theft Auto on my fellow San Antonians and will it get me pumped up to write about human beings slaughtering one another? Enjoy. Click to read more…

We’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that if you read the internet, you also sometimes read off the internet, on these printed things called “pages” which are sometimes collected together in one convenient volume known as a “book.” To that end, here are four books about metal we greatly enjoyed this year.

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Well, it’s sure been a nifty four months or so for Scraping Genius Off The Wheel, my infrequent but always essential noise rock column for this fine blog for jerks. Despite the fact that all I’ve been listening to lately is 70’s funk and Akon’s superb new album Freedom, try not to hold it against me as you review my list of my favorite heavy music releases of 2008.

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1. Torche – Meanderthal (Hydra Head)
2. Septic Flesh – Communion (Candlelight)
3. Raconteurs – Consolers Of The Lonely (Warner Bros)
4. Foxy Shazam – Introducing (New Weatherman/Ferret)
5. 36 Crazyfists – The Tide and its Takers (Ferret Music)
6. Secret & Whisper – Great White Whale (Tooth & Nail)
7. Eluveitie – Slania (Nuclear Blast)
8. Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds – Dig Lazarus Dig (Mute)
9. Opeth – Watershed (Roadrunner)
10. The Giraffes – Prime Motivator (Crustacean)

AFTER THE JUMP: Anton OyVey’s Top Christian Rock Bands of All Time

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I loathe having to pare down every album I’ve listened to over the course of the year into a list of the “best 10.” I find it exceedingly difficult because there’s just no way to prevent great albums from being squeezed out. And while my list excludes phenomenal efforts by Meshuggah, Boris, Testament, Arsis and all the neo-Thrash acts who put out quality material in 2008, bear in mind that as a reviewer I’m always having to move on to the next writing deadline and don’t often get to revisit albums purely out of enjoyment. My ten picks represent the discs I have frequently fallen back on in those all too rare, carefree moments. Each of these inspired me to pull them back out for repeated spins when I should have been getting work done.

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My first Fuck Rolling Stone post on metal singers was such a hit I thought I’d dig back into the RS archives and stir up some more shit. So, I decided to re-read their summertime list of the 100 Greatest Guitarists of All Time (also here).

Thankfully, there are a few metallic (but mostly rockish) noteworthy icons; however, extreme metal is woefully ignored. Nonetheless, the list did include Jimi Hendrix (#1), Jimmy Page (#9), Kirk Hammett (#11), Kurt Cobain (#12), Johnny Ramone (#16), Tom Morello (#26), Thurston Moore/Lee Ranaldo (Sonic Youth) (#33/#34), Joe Perry (#48), Ritchie Blackmore (#55), Vernon Reid (#66), Eddie Van Halen (#70), Adam Jones (Tool) (#75), D. Boon (The Minutemen) (#89), Glen Buxton (Alice Cooper) (#90), Wayne Kramer/Fred “Sonic” Smith (MC5) (#92/#93), Kevin Shields (My Bloody Valentine) (#95), Angus Young (#96), Leigh Stephens (Blue Cheer) (#98), Greg Ginn (Black Flag) (#99), and Kim Thayil (Soundgarden) (#100).

And, yet another reason why we here at the MetalSucks Mansion like to say “Fuck Rolling Stone!” — coming in at #86, TOMMY Iommi…yes, “TOMMY.” How the fuck do you not know the first name of one of the true legends of not only metal, but of rock guitars? Hmmmmmmmm….Please, clue me in.

IT’S TONY, YOU FUCKS!!!

Anyway, here is my stab at the best Metal Guitarists of All Time — and for a point of reference, my Old Fartness will be shining through here, as will my love for rhythm guitarists:

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Different strokes for different folks, as the saying goes. While we’re arguing about the best releases of 2008, I thought I’d tip all you MetalSucks Maniacs off to the list of 21 albums from which I will be whittling down when creating my own top 10 year-end list (Which, as Vince said, will be published on Monday, December 15, along with all the other MetalSucks Mansion inhabitants’ lists.). There’s some overlap with Vince, natch, but maybe not as much as you’d expect.

In order to give you no clue whatsoever as to where my head is at, I’ve put all my picks in alphabetical order.

And if there’s an album that you love that you don’t see on here, it’s not because I forgot it and it’s not (necessarily) because I didn’t like it – it’s just because, at the end of the day, I know it ain’t gonna make the cut. Dem’s da breaks. Sorry.

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2008 has been a fucking great year for metal, and in due time — Monday, Dec. 15, to be exact — Axl, myself and the rest of the writers of MetalSucks will all release our Top 10 year-end lists so you can incessantly argue over which great album was left off or tell us we’re assholes for ranking a certain album higher than it should’ve been.

But for now, ya’ll can argue about something else: here’s my personal short/working list for said year-end list containing all of my favorite metal releases from this year as well as a few that aren’t likely to make my own list but will surely be appearing on others’. Feel free to pipe in with your thoughts or to notify us of any egregious omissions before we put together our final, ordered lists. Regardless, it is going to be really fucking hard to pick just 10 of these and put them in order of awesomeness.

And, my favorite metal records of 2008 in no particular order are…

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