Let’s take a look at a band that, amazingly enough, doesn’t take itself as seriously as, say, every other band that has originated from the Scandinavian Peninsula. Formed in 2004 by Children of Bodom’s Alexi Laiho, Kylähullut was a silly side-project featuring Tonmi Lillman (Ex- To/Die/For) and Vesku Jokinen (Klamydia). I’ve liked the occasional Bodom song and Laiho was pretty easy on the eyes until he wasn’t, but I gotta say, I much prefer him and Jokinen rasping in a language I don’t understand than anything relating to hate crews. Kylähullut, which means “village idiots,” performs all their songs in Finnish, and they’re all simple thrash/punk metal ditties as easy to digest as your average pop song.

Though their most recent release is 2007’s Peräaukko Sivistyksessä, I prefer the first album, Turpa Täynnä, from 2005. As well as an abundance of umlauts, each song has a delightful name, especially “Scenehuora,” which means, if you couldn’t guess, “scene whore.” I also quite like “…Ja Jeesus ei pysy ristillään!” (“…And Jesus won’t stay on his cross!”) and “Vitun urpo!” (“Fucking idiot!”). The exclamation points are a nice touch.

My favorite song of theirs, though, “Ei pelkoa,” which was also the first Kylähullut song I ever heard. It’s has a touch of the customary Laiho guitars, but without his proclivity to meander endlessly. I think the fact that each song barely hits three minutes really plays up to the trio’s strengths. No frills, just hard, straightforward music. The only song that sort of bugs me is “Kylähullut, ” which features Kimberley Goss, whose voice makes me want to throttle cute, innocent things. It sounds like Andrew WK mated with a Finnish Avril Lavigne. But even that tune has its charm.

Also, if someone could explain to me what the hell is happening in this video, I’d appreciate it. I found it while searching for the song “Kääpiöt.” Far as I can tell, it’s the three dudes on a very special adventure together.

They actually remind me of another silly Finnish act (not in terms of the actual music, but just their general air and attitude), Eläkeläiset. A geriatric band that does heavy metal polka (humppa) covers with the occasional pop or rock song thrown in for good measure. Like. “Smells Like Teen Humppa.”  I really don’t know what these bands are drinking, but I would like to try it.

-LF

Hard to believe, but I don’t think I’ve actually seen Children of Bodom live since they did Gigantour in 2008. I blame Alexi Laiho’s broken arm (in 2009) and choosing to tour with Black Label Society (in 2010) as the culprits.

But that’s gonna change this summer, fer sure. ‘Cause look what Heavy Devy tweeted yesterday:

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So MetalSucks Mega-Maniac Shinaain tried to send us this video earlier in the week, but it had been taken off of YouTube. She was good enough to tell us when it magically re-appeared; apparently, some people didn’t like the way it was edited originally (there’s now an alternate version here), and objected to its original title, “Eleven Things You Didn’t Know About” blah blah blah, because Bodom’s hardcore fans (Hate Crew Deathrollers, or whatever they’re called) knew a lot of this stuff already.

But if you’re like me, and you’re a Bodom fan but you haven’t been hanging on Laiho’s every word for the past thirteen years, this is pretty fun. Hey, my first guitar was a Strat, too! And I was eleven years old when I got it, also! Alexi and I have so much in common. Besides my total lack of musical talent, I mean. But still!!! Maybe we can be besties.

-AR

Apparently the Alexi Laiho giveaway we announced last month was a popular contest, and with all these sweet prizes it’s not shocking that so many of you entered and have since been pestering us to announce the winner:

• 1 ESP LTD Alexi Scythe 600 Guitar
• 1 Rock House Metal Pack of 24 Instructional DVDs
• 1 year’s supply of Alexi Signature DR Strings (24 sets)
• 1 “Coffin Case” for the ESP guitar
• 1 Autographed Alexi EMG set
• 1 Guitar Hero: Warriors of Rock Guitar Bundle (Winner’s choice on the console)

The suspense is over, as MetalSucks reader RumuluXX is the lucky one who will be receiving all that great gear listed above. We asked you to tell us what your favorite Children of Bodom guitar solo was and why, and here’s the answer he gave:

My favorite Bodom solo is Needled 24/7, and it should be yours too. Why? Because the first time I heard it I got an erection so massive that it tore a hole in time and space that created an alternate universe. An alternate universe where Ted Nugent only plays music and never talks. An alternate universe where Cliff Burton is still alive and Metallica is still relevant. An alternate universe where Chris Farley is alive and the guys who made Vampires Suck/Date Movie/Epic Movie are raped on a daily basis by an incredibly large black man known only by the name of “Incredibly Large Black Man. Every time I hear this solo our world crosses into that one a little bit more, and isn’t that a world you want to live in?

Congrats, dude! Enjoy your bounty.

Hypocrisy were s’posed to follow-up the November release of their excellent new album, A Taste of Extreme Divinity, with a North American tour – with Children of Bodom’s Alexi Laiho playin’ the gee-tar, no less. We were super stoked for that tour, but unfortunately, the swine in U.S. immigration wouldn’t let Peter Tagtgren and company into the country, presumably because The Man wants us all to keep fighting each other so we don’t notice that He’s screwing us, and He knew that a North American Hypocrisy tour could maybe, just maybe, bring peace and love to the huddled masses. Either that, or the band’s paperwork wasn’t quite in order. But either way, it blew goats.

Luckily, it seems that Hypocrisy’s problems are now behind them, and they’ve announced another North American tour. And while, unfortunately, it seems like Laiho won’t be in tow this time out, they will have Hate, Blackguard and Swashbuckle with them. So that’s not bad.

Get dates after the jump.

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At long last, we’ve chosen a winner for our Alexi Laiho impersonation contest. There were a lot of really funny entries, but sadly most of them were disqualified for being outside the U.S. (read the rules, people!). Andrew N. from New City, NY emerged victorious, and will soon be the proud owner of his very own ESP Scythe for filming and submitting the below video (and not for nothin’, being a skilled guitar player!). Thanks to all who participated… check out all of the awesome entries on the Alexi Laiho Imprsonation Contest Page.

So were pretty stoked about Hypocrisy’s upcoming U.S. tour with Children of Bodom’s Alexi Laiho playin the leed gee-tar, but then it looked like U.S. immigration might derail the whole thing. And now they have.

A very brief statement from the band reads:

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Metal fans, let’s take a collective moment to consider ourselves blessed with some big Peters. Peters who will take you firmly from both sides of the mixing board with confidence and expertise. Sweaty, bulging-veined Peters whose live shows leave willing multitudes spent, sated, slack – and more than a bit bruised. These Peters, thanks to generous endowments of talent, stand fully erect as superstars in real metal. Each of metal’s hugest Peters share a rock hard work ethic, hardly pausing for rest between releases captured on tape and performances in the flesh, after which they simply move on to violate again in another city.

In the premiere installment of MetalSucks’ Metal’s Biggest Peters, I spoke by phone with Peter Tagtgren of Hypocrisy, who recently added a third instant classic to his resume with A Taste of Extreme Divinity (buy it now, DBAA). Tagtgren is a death metal household name and represents the rare quintuple-threat (guitar, vocals, production, songwriting, hair). With his feet up on the mixing board (awesome!) and in good humor, Tagtgren spoke at length about crappy production, freaking out metal fans, and why his bands Hypocrisy and Pain are ‘guinea pigs’ for the benefit of others.

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We’re very excited about Hypocrisy upcoming U.S. tour with Children of Bodom’s Alexi Laiho on guitar. In fact, in the next forty-eight hours, we’re planning to run an interview that our own Anso DF recently conducted with Hypocrisy main dude Peter Tägtgren.

So it’s heartbreaking to report that the tour might go down the shitter, as Hypocrisy are just the latest in a long line of bands to run into trouble with U.S. immigration. A statement from the band follows:

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Time is winding down! You only have until midnight this Saturday, appropriately Halloween day, to submit your best impersonation of Alexi for a chance to win his sick-ass ESP guitar. In case you forgot what the deal was here’s a snippet from the contest page:

Between now and October 31, you’re going to film yourself doing your very best impersonation of Alexi Laiho. What does that mean? Exactly what it sounds like; you’re going to do whatever it takes* to create a video where we can’t tell you apart from Alexi. You can wear a wig, you can adopt Alexi’s stage moves, or anything you want within reason. But to win, you’d better make us laugh, or blow our minds with your ability to be a clone of Alexi. In any case, our panel of judges will watch each video, and the one we deem the coolest will be selected to win an ESP Alexi Laiho Signature Series LTD AL-600 Scythe guitar!

So what are you waiting for? We’ve already got a ton of funny entries. Get to recording and enter the contest!

If you read this site regularly you know I’m fascinated with temporary team-ups, like Dave Lombardo playing drums for Metallica or Doc Coyle playing guitar for Lamb of God. I just love these little glimpses into some alternate reality where great bands traded great musicians.

So here’s a good one: according to Metal Underground, Children of Bodom’s Alexi Laiho will be playing guitar with Hypocrisy on their upcoming North American tour.

Says Hypocrisy mastermind Peter Tagtgren:

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Speaking of Decibel: their, um, let’s call it an “electronic division,” The Deciblog, has gotten Children of Bodom main man Alexi Laiho to supply his top five metal riffs of all time. (Thus the headline. Ah-duh.) If somebody asked me to do that, I’d probably blow my brains out, so props to Alexi for giving it a shot.

As we know first hand here at MS, posting any list like this is an open invitation for a shitstorm to rain down upon your head, but I suspect that Alexi’s list especially will cause arguments. I believe this will be the case for two reasons:

1. He’s Alexi fuckin’ Laiho, not some blogger.
2. He put a Black Label Society riff on the list.

Read the entire list here, then come back and get embroiled in some good old fashioned name-calling.

And don’t forget that we’re currently running a contest where you can impersonate Alexi for a chance to win an ESP Alexi Laiho Signature Series LTD AL-600 Scythe guitar! Enter that shit now!

-AR

Don’t lie; we know you’ve grabbed your guitar (or a tennis racket, or a broomstick, or the like) and pretended to rock along with your favorite musicians. Hey, we all play guitar too. We know how it is. Normally, you probably don’t want anyone to see you imagining yourself onstage in front of 50,000 screaming fans. But we’re going to give you a good reason to let the whole world watch.

Between now and October 31, you’re going to film yourself doing your very best impersonation of Children of Bodom’s Alexi Laiho. What does that mean? Exactly what it sounds like; you’re going to do whatever it takes* to create a video where we can’t tell you apart from Alexi. You can wear a wig, you can adopt Alexi’s stage moves, or anything you want within reason. But to win, you’d better make us laugh, or blow our minds with your ability to be a clone of Alexi. Our panel of judges will watch each video, and the one we deem the coolest will be selected to win an ESP Alexi Laiho Signature Series LTD AL-600 Scythe guitar!

Click to read more…