The old cliché goes that genius is the very simple idea that, for whatever reason, no one has ever had before. Assuming that’s true, then Cannibal Corpse are the Albert Einsteins of metal. For these dudes were not, at the beginning, great musicians. They were just some kids from Buffalo who basically listened to thrash and said “We wanna do that, but make it even heavier and more evil-sounding.” And so they did. And simple though it seems (Tomb of the Mutilated might be considered quaint if it were released today) Cannibal Corpse – particularly the original line-up of vocalist Chris Barnes, bassist Alex Webster, drummer Paul Mazurkiewicz, and guitarists Jack Owen and Bob Rusay – are undeniably one of the most influential bands in all of metal history. They are one of the key creators of death metal as we know it. As though he felt the words to Slayer’s “Angel of Death” just weren’t violent enough, Barnes practically invented pure gore as lyrical fodder; he also reinvented his craft (if you can call making it sound like your lungs are having violent diarrhea a “craft”). Producer Scott Burns, who was basically the sixth member of the band for years, obviously deserves his share of the credit for their accomplishments, too. Basically, if you’ve ever enjoyed to pretty much any death metal song ever, you probably owe Cannibal Corpse a handjob.

And that, of course, is precisely the problem.

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Thanks to MS Maniac Matt Fields for letting us know that original Cannibal Corpse guitarist Robert (nee Bob) Rusay has resurfaced as a golf instructor in Gilbert, Arizona:

After leaving the band, I quickly met my soul mate, Julie Christine Hammond. It was love at first sight and a family was in our immediate future. We were married shortly after that and had two beautiful children, with a new career just around the corner. For me it was just a matter of committing to it. Even before we married, the encouragement and support I got from my wife made the decision to pursue a career in the golf industry an easy one.

The next step was to obtain my teaching certification and that choice was easy. It would be the United States Golf Teachers Federation because the USGTF is all about teaching. After the first day of certification, I realized that to understand the basics and fundamentals of the golf swing made the game so much more enjoyable.

Golf > playing songs about smashing faces in.

-VN