I’m going to put about as much effort into this intro as the thief who was sent to prison by the jury I served on last week did into not leaving his cell phone at the scene of the crime.

We begin this week with “Follow the Signs,” the new video from Born of Osiris. On the whole this clip is pretty cool, and I applaud all parties involved for trying to make something way more epic than most modern metal vids. But sticking the band in front of a green screen for their performance footage was a mistake, ’cause it looks silly and cheap, and the editing is completely random, which long time readers know is a pet peeve of mine — and is especially bothersome when dealing with a band like BOO, whose music provides such obvious rhythmic cutting points I can’t believe anyone would just ignore them like this. Bummer.

Click to read more…

Yo! Have you guys signed up for our new e-mail list yet? If not, you can, and should, do so above. You’ll get occasional updates from the MS Mansion with breaking stories, special features, exclusive premieres, etc., delivered right to your inbox. Don’t worry, we won’t spam you — expect a newsletter-type of situation with updates once a week at most. And don’t forget to friend us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter to stay up-to-the-minute on all the latest suckage.

With that shameless plug out of the way, let’s look at some of the things we did this week, shall we?

• Maybe we should rename the site “Sports Suck?” God Forbid’s Doc Coyle taught us about the NBA and Lazarus A.D.’s Jeff Paulick taught us about the NFL.
• We spoke to Matt Halpern from Periphery and Bandhappy and Nick Cohon from Cormorant.
• We were saddened to report that legendary Black Sabbath guitarist has been diagnosed with lymphoma.
• Jason Richardson was saddened to learn that he has been fired from Born of Osiris.
• We considered ten possible candidates to replace Howard Jones in Killswitch Engage.
• We wagered that the new Metallica album is not going to sound like The Black Album despite what the band says.
• We passed judgement on the new Van Halen single and video.
• We got excited that Refused and At the Drive In are reuniting.
• We learned that Virgin Steele are from Long Island.
• We started to look at some Albums That Will Fuck Your Face Off in 2012: new releases from Adimiron, Hypno5e, Ides of Gemini, Pallbearer, Sai Nam, and Samothrace.

Next week we’ll have even more Albums That Will Fuck Your Face Off, interviews, premieres, and, of course, plenty of snark. ‘Til then, brothers and sisters…

-AR

So yesterday afternoon, Born of Osiris announced that guitarist Jason Richardson was no longer in the band. In an official statement, BOO called the split “something that just needed to happen” and promised that the group “will be a more creative, energized, and focused unit as a result.” And even though the subtext of that assertion isn’t so nice to Richardson (’cause it implies that he was in some way impeding the band’s creativity, energy, and focus), the actual text of the statement was completely cordial, advising fans that there is “No reason to tear Jason down for this” and declaring that “We still love Jason.”

Alas, when Richardson later released his own statement, he wasn’t so kind to his now-former bandmates, basically saying that he was let go for confronting the other members about what he perceived to be their substance abuse issues:

Click to read more…

It’s no secret that playing in a real metal band is a one-way, express ticket to poverty, obscurity and involuntary abstinence. I mean, if a legend like poor Lemmy is relegated to a shitty apartment in Hollywood, surrounded by a lifetime’s worth of dinosaur-metal detritus, I shudder to think how depressing the lives of lesser metal losers must be.

On the other hand, bands like Asking Alexandria, Suiside Silence, and Bring Me The Horizon are getting laid, paid and laughing all the way to the bank, much to the chagrin of metal purists. The handwriting is on the wall, and it couldn’t be any more clear: playing anything other than metalcore/deathcore is career suicide.

If you don’t believe me, check out this guided tour of BORN OF OSIRIS’ posh pad in Wheaton, Illinois (AKA The Temple Of Osiris AKA The House That Sumeriancore Built [or leases, at least]).

My notes:

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Before there were blogs there were these things called magazines, and the only metal magazine we still get excited about reading every month is Decibel. Here’s managing editor Andrew Bonazelli…

And now, it’s the time of the week you’ve all been waiting for: the three-hour window your folks are out of the house, allowing you to jack off comfortably Decibel’s monthly Guess Next Month’s Cover and Win a Decibot Shirt Contest! I’m going to predict this will be the first “FIRST” to get the answer right —provided, of course, that the band/musician/farm animal we’re spotlighting is in fact typed out below the “FIRST.” Unless the first person who sees this types in “System of a Down,” just to be a dick/radical. That said, it’s been a few years since System of a Down proper existed — although who hasn’t enjoyed the “Five Serj Tankian Solo Albums Nobody Cares About/Bassist ‘n’ Friend Randomly Beating the Shit Out of Brent Hinds Era” — so they could ostensibly be rocking spiked wristbands now.

But no, it’s not System of a Down. There’s your hint.

-AB

Decibel’s June 2011 issue, which features Ghost, Killing Joke, Mastodon, Hate Eternal, Gorguts, Protest the Hero, Born of Osiris, and Scale The Summit is available here, or make your mama proud and just get a full subscription.

ROTFLOL at the name “AllStars Tour.” HAHAHAHAA hahahaha! I mean, wow. As Metal Insider‘s Zach Shaw states, “I’d look at this tour as more of a farm league tour. It’s not like the majority of the tour is ready to be called up to the majors just yet…” Baaahahaha

Whew. Anyway.

Exactly one band on this tour is worth seeing (After the Burial, who oughtta inspire immediate ball-hair growth amongst the audience’s 12-year old boys). In the contest of any ordinary tour I wouldn’t be that interested in Born of Osiris, but surrounded by such suckitude I guess I’ll give them a mulligan here for “bands worth seeing.” I know Axl would heartily endorse Iwrestledabearonce (me, not so much, but we can still be friends), so let’s just say that together Born of Osiris + IWABO = 1 band worth seeing. But the rest of this lineup? Holy dick on a cake, I wouldn’t piss on this lineup if it was on fire. On the bright side, at least they’re all in one place; none of these bands will be polluting otherwise solid lineups between the dates of July 22nd and August 22nd.

-VN

Before there were blogs there were these things called magazines, and the only metal magazine we still get excited about reading every month is Decibel. Here’s managing editor Andrew Bonazelli…

There’s been a lot of buzz about remaking The Crow with Bradley Cooper. Because, you know, nothing conveys goth-punk flair, existential angst and an unyielding appetite for vengeance like the frat guy who probably stuffed fans of the original into lockers. The producers should’ve just gone to Killing Joke mastermind Jaz Coleman. Not only would it at least be novel to see a 50-year-old Crow, but he’s been dressing the part for years.

In 1980, Coleman and his band were bloodthirsty rebels in spirit, not image. Their eponymous E.G. Records debut careened unpredictably between post-punk, metal, prog, disco and what we now know as industrial. Killing Joke influenced, well, pretty much everybody in the interior and exterior of Decibel and MetalSucks’ Venn diagram. (If you’ve never heard them, somehow, drop a jaw at the third paragraph of their Wiki page.) Add incendiary, prophetic, political screeds to taste, and you’ve got a recipe for a wicked Hall of Fame, appearing in our Ghost issue.

As usual, author Chris Dick went above and beyond to make this HOF one of the most thorough Killing Joke interviews ever; hence, we have reams of bonus content. Here’s a little bonus bloodsport to whet your appetite.

Click to read more…

Two days late but not two dollars short, I figure ya’ll might like to know how all the albums that came out last Tuesday (April 12th) fared sales-wise, even though I think we can all agree that album sales aren’t the be-all-end-all measure of a band’s success. So without further ado, here’s how the new Between the Buried and Me, Foo Fighters and Red Fang albums sold last week.

Also, Dave Grohl is a very rich man; in addition to the ginormous debut of his new Foo Fighters album, seemingly every Foo catalog album made a return back onto the charts this past week.

Right, the numbers:

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Last year (and the year before) I got way too busy with this thing called life and missed out on a lot of quality music. I am here to rectify the error of my ways, month by month.

Here are the March 2011 releases that got under my skin, burrowed their way into my brain, made my ears bleed, or simply tickled my unmentionables:

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If you’d've told me in 1993 that some Swedish metal band that sings about Viking lore would sell more records than Pearl Jam 18 years later, I’d've called you crazy. Shit, if you’d have told me earlier this year that Amon Amarth would sell more records than Pearl Jam I’d've called you crazy. But that’s exactly what happened this past week. Sure, the Pearl Jam release in question was a reissue, but still; how unlikely is it that Amon Amarth, of all bands, have one of the strongest metal debuts of 2011 so far, strong enough to net them #1 on the Hard Music chart — selling roughly 14x the number of copies The Haunted’s new album did (in the U.S.) — and to beat out the enduring monolith that is Pearl Jam? Pretty fucking unlikely, and pretty fucking awesome too. Slow and steady wins the race, I suppose… 13 years and 8 albums in, Amon Amarth have broken through.

No doubt, it’s all due to this 10-year old Amon Amarth fan (WARNING: severe metalhead overload alert!).

Whitesnake (!), Within Temptation, Cavalera Conspiracy, Becoming the Archetype, Obscura and The Haunted also cracked the Top Hard Music Top 100 in their first week of U.S. release; those releases and other notable charting albums after the jump.

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That headline doesn’t even make sense. So what? Seven of the Top 10 Hard Music albums on this week’s Soundscam charts are actually new(ish) releases! And only one is a greatest hits! Hallelujah!

Rise Against continued to dominate, while new releases by Soundgarden (sorta), Protest the Hero, Born of Osiris and Tesseract sold well. A bunch of other records came out, too (uhhh… Saliva, uhh…. CKY, uhhh… Straight Line Stitch) and some solid sellers from weeks past remained on the charts. Numbers after the break.

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Props to Heavy Blog is Heavy for catching this interesting update from Sumerian Records’ official Facebook page:

As HBiH notes, this sounds like it’s going to be a release (or releases) in the vein of Roadrunner United and Nuclear Blast All-Stars — basically a “who’s who” team-up of musicians signed to the label. Those offerings actually ended up being, by and large, pretty cool (I mean, of course there were some missteps, but I don’t look back at those albums and think, “Well, that was ill-advised”), and Sumerian’s current roster is one of the strongest in metal (The Faceless, Animals as Leaders, Periphery, Veil of Maya, After the Burial, etc., pretty much make up for their creatively vapid bands like Asking Alexandria and Upon a Burning Body), so it makes sense that they’d wanna do something like this.

Question is… what form, exactly, will it take? I almost don’t care, as long as Bizzy Bone is involved. Hey, it could happen.

-AR

New records by Born of Osiris, Tesseract, Protest the Hero, The Haunted and Agnostic Front oughtta peak buyers’ eyes at their favorite e-tailer today, while a handful of other releases are hitting the cloud as well. Check out Vic Vaughn’s preview of each after the jump.

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Oh my fuck, you guys, IT IS 71 DEGREES OUTSIDE. I was gonna stay home and watch Vanilla Ice’s underrated cinemetallic classic, Cool as Ice, but instead I am getting stoned and going for a long, long walk in the sun. Quickly, before I ditch you losers to actually enjoy life, here’s what we did this week:

• God Forbid’s Doc Coyle weighed-in on Sergeant D.’s “band life is for losers” theory.
• We broke the news that hardcore supergroup S.O.S. has signed with Good Fightand got an exclusive report on the status of He is Legend from the band’s manager.
• We debuted new music by Napalm Death (thanks, Decibel!), The Haunted and Clutch.
• We said cel-lo to Grayceon’s Jackie Perez Gratz and got the skinny on the new Today is the Day album from drummer Curran Reynolds.
• We checked out the latest release from Total Fucking Destruction.
• We wondered if women make better metal singers than men.
• We examined the Kid Rock-Confederate flag controversy.
• We watched the worst video of 2011 so far.
• Dummy Nosenothing listened to the new Meshuggah song and then chased an ice cream truck.
• WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK…

Alright, I’m gonna go have some ice cream! ICE CREAM! YYYYAAAAAYYYYY!!!

-AR

Have you guys heard this new Meshuggah song? It’s called “Two Worlds of Design.” I was listening to it, and at first I was like, “Oh YEAH! Mesuggah is back, bay-bee!” I mean, Jens Kidman’s voice sounded a little less like the Cookie Monster and a little more like that singer from that band my nephew likes, but whatevs. NEW MESHUGGAH FUCKING RULES. Amiriteoramiriteoramirite?

Then, partway through the song, I heard the ice cream truck outside. So I paused the tune to run and catch it, ’cause as much as I love Meshuggah, the internet ain’t goin’ nowhere, bu the ice cream truck only comes by once a day!

So I run outside, and there’s no ice cream truck. And I’m real bummed ’cause I musta just missed it. But I go back inside and decide to finish the Meshuggah song, ’cause that should cheer me up.

And as soon as I hit “play,” guess what happens? I HEARD THE ICE CREAM TRUCK AGAIN! God answered my prayers and gave me a second chance! So, again, I pause the song and I run outside.

Click to read more…

From Beastmaster:

“Over the last week I’ve noticed on the PRP that both Chelsea Grin and Within The Ruins have been denied entry into to Canada for their separate respective tours. Now granted, I don’t necessarily love these two bands, but I’m wondering if they are possibly related in some way…. Dun dun DUNNNNNNNN.”

Yes. They are both related in that I don’t like either of them. Unfortunately, I don’t control the Canadian government, so my guess is that they actually both just have merch dudes with records for possession or something idiotic like that. In any case, yes, I agree it’s ridiculous that Canada gets to be spared Chelsea Grin while Americans have to continue to endure them.

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Well, this is kind of a bummer.

Andrew Tapley — who, until recently at least, was one of three guitar players in The Human Abstract — has posted the following message on his Facebook page:

Click to read more…

I’ve never been able to “get” Born of Osiris. They’re technically proficient enough (these days who isn’t) but they just never really stood out to me when stacked up against their peers. They’re not as proggy as The Faceless, don’t have the songs of After the Burial, aren’t as good players as Animals as Leaders, aren’t as dumbed-down and breakdown happy as Emmure… you get the point. An OK band that never really stuck out for me, for better or worse. And of course there’s the now infamous Danzig Debacle of 2009 which made it incredibly difficult to take these guys seriously; it’ll probably dog this band until they’re Danzig’s age and some young whippersnappers profess ignorance by not knowing who Tosin Abasi is.

But I have now heard the new Born of Osiris song “Follow the Signs” and I think I finally “get it.”

Click to read more…

Well, the line-up for this year’s New England Metal & Hardcore Festival — one of the oldest and most revered extreme music fests in the U.S. — has been announced, and it’s… interesting. The fest returns to a three-day format after being only two days last year, but if I’m not mistaken, this is the first time that the initial day will be a Thursday, not a Friday. And as reader Brian Kessler pointed out to us via e-mail, there are two noteworthy aspects to the lineup:

• It seems like metal and hardcore have been further segregated on the bill — Thursday appears to be almost entirely dedicated to deathcore and crabcore bands, Friday seems to be entirely devoted to hardcore bands, and Saturday is dominated by metal bands. There are pros and cons to this approach — the pro being that if you’re only a fan of one particular style of extreme music, you can cherry pick which day you’re going to attend, and the con being that new fans are less likely to be exposed to bands with whom they were not already familiar.
• There seem to be fewer “big name” acts. Sure, Hatebreed and Biohazard are on there, but that’s still a far cry from years’ past. In fact, plenty of big name who have new albums scheduled to come out this year — like Amon Amarth, DevilDriver, Arch Enemy, In Flames, and Children of Bodom — aren’t playing the fest.

Please note that I’m not knocking the fest — in fact, I think Saturday, April 16 is full of killer bands — and I don’t think every fest needs to be headlined by a band of Megadeth’s stature. I just think this particular line-up is… interesting.

Anyway, here’s the full bill:

Click to read more…

Well, the line-up for this year’s New England Metal & Hardcore Festival — one of the oldest and most revered extreme music fests in the U.S. — has been announced, and it’s… interesting. The fest returns to a three-day format after being only two days last year, but if I’m not mistaken, this is the first time that the initial day will be a Thursday, not a Friday. And as reader Brian Kessler pointed out to us via e-mail, there are two noteworthy aspects to the lineup:

• It seems like metal and hardcore have been further segregated on the bill — Thursday appears to be almost entirely dedicated to deathcore and crabcore bands, Friday seems to be entirely devoted to hardcore bands, and Saturday is dominated by metal bands. There are pros and cons to this approach — the pro being that if you’re only a fan of one particular style of extreme music, you can cherry pick which day you’re going to attend, and the con being that new fans are less likely to be exposed to bands with whom they were not already familiar.
• There seem to be fewer “big name” acts. Sure, Hatebreed and Biohazard are on there, but that’s still a far cry from years’ past. In fact, plenty of big name who have new albums scheduled to come out this year — like Amon Amarth, DevilDriver, Arch Enemy, In Flames, and Children of Bodom — aren’t playing the fest.

Please note that I’m not knocking the fest — in fact, I think Saturday, April 16 is full of killer bands — and I don’t think every fest needs to be headlined by a band of Megadeth’s stature. I just think this particular line-up is… interesting.

Anyway, here’s the full bill:

Click to read more…