Seeming as though there will never cease to be a supply of beginner and amateur bands in the world, I’ve written some of my Jumping Darkness Parade entries in their honor. A little bit of practical advice applied to whatever it is you’re doing can help move you a long way. Well, in this case I’m talking to any band, at any level, which is performing a gig and are NOT the final act of the night. If you’re in Metallica and the whole world plays by your rules, then congratulations and don’t bother reading this. But for the rest of us, stage etiquette is essential if you aspire to have an easy working relationship with your band mates, other bands on the bill, local crews, and beyond.
I want to focus on the dreaded changeover. This is the part of the night where either the pieces are laid into place to ensure an easy start to the show, or where things will begin to fall apart. How long you take to be set up and ready to play AS WELL AS how quickly you can get offstage will have a big impact on how your band is treated that night, and in the long run. If your set ends and your drummer decides to take apart his kit on stage while your guitarist sits in a corner on stage wrapping his cables, taking their sweet-ass time while another band is dealing with a fifteen minute window to get set up and started, then your band is fucking up. And also, your band is fucking up if it’s your turn to go and your drummer starts setting up his kit onstage, guitarist is fumbling with all his cables, somebody (bassist, vocalist, whoever) is nowhere to be found, and another guitarist who got his rig up quickly is noodling away annoying everyone.
Let me go on a rant for a second. Is there anything more annoying during a changeover than watching some dude stand up there and play fifteen minutes of guitar solos while the house music is still going amidst the general chaos on stage caused by everyone else trying to get the band set up? Is there a more eloquent way to say “YOU ARE FUCKING UP, SIR?” First of all, you look like a disorganized bunch of idiots acting that way. People take note. Second of all – and this relates to what I just said – you will lose the audience looking like a bunch of bumbling idiots. Third, you are most likely holding up the show and pissing off a) the headliner, b) the other bands after you, c) their crews, d) the club and their crews.
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Remember Sean Farber, Daath’s old singer? I’ve never met the dude since his tenure with the band ended before we had any relationship with them, so for all I know the guy is a real sweetheart. But he infamously left Daath, “for all intensive purposes,” to pursue other dreams, including starting his own religion. And while I have no idea how that quest is going, the fact that I haven’t read about “Farbertology” or whatever somewhere leads me to believe that the answer is, “Not very well.”
