MetalSucks

Hi everybody! I’m back from my two week vacation! Did you miss me? What, you didn’t know I was gone? Fuck you in the face!

Well anyway, I missed some of you, mainly the hideously unattractive and socially awkward noise rock aficionados that read my stupid column for jerks. So it gives me great pleasure to report that Pissed Jeans will released its third album on August 18. King Of Jeans, the group’s second full-length for Sub Pop, is the follow-up to 2007’s Hope For Men, a damned modern classic of sleazy gutter-level rock inspired and emboldened by the tradition of David Yow and The Jesus Lizard. Though I have yet to hear any of this new material, I anticipate nothing short of fucking awesomeness from tracks with lascivious titles like “Human Upskirt” and “Request for Masseuse”.

Click to read more…

Josh Homme’s favorite band, the ever-defiant and unabashedly offensive Dwarves, needs no introduction to any of you awkward overgrown boys who stood gawking and giggling in the local Sam Goody at their album covers as even more immature adolescents. Fronted by miscreant Blag Dahlia, the group made itself known as much for its brash punk rock tunes as for intentionally, sacrilegiously tasteless artwork that could be considered pornographic to a hapless Palin-esque puritan. After a retrospectively hilarious Beatles-referencing stunt of “killing off” exhibitionism prone guitarist HeWhoCannotBeNamed, the band was evicted from the unamused Sub Pop and ultimately found a new home a few years later on Epitaph. Despite not having released a new album since 2004, the Dwarves carry on with live assaults for their rabid fans.

Click to read more…