What was once inconceivable is now a reality: A David Lee Roth-fronted Van Halen is set to release a new album! It took 28 years, a soul-crushing false start with Roth in 1996, the dumping of bassist/backing vocalist Michael Anthony, and a new label home, but A Different Kind Of Truth finally arrives today. However, a fair appraisal of Truth could be dicey: Fans might get swept up in the grand return of a pined-after loved one, while the indifferent can effortlessly cry foul at Truth‘s mining of 35 year-old material and at suspiciously deft Wolfgang Van Halen bass lines. And yet early reviews state that Truth is a remarkably authentic classic Van Halen experience.

Here’s what steps VH took to recapture that old magic:

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Holy shit it is time to get super-pumped for new Van Halen music. That is for sure, fun lovers! Of course, it has been like thirteen years since their most recent album, so the music-makers of VH had some dust to shake off. No biggie. The more daunting task before Team Van Halen now is succeeding at their first album campaign since the upheaval of the record sales and of marketing practices.

Again, music is not the question, but rather how will these recording artists — once kings of presentation, promotions, and imagery during pop music’s last big shake-up, the MTV revolution — fare in the age of non-sales, lightning-fast rumors, and insidious internet marketing, and with the thud of Chinese Democracy still echoing and Aerosmith’s next winner looming ahead?

So far, the pre-natal life of A Different Kind Of Truth (out February 7 oh baby!!) is kinda wonky and marked by weird decisions and missed opportunities for coolness. Let’s take a friendly look: Click to read more…

The wait is over: the new Van Halen single, “Tattoo,” is here, and it even has a music video. This is exciting, of course, because the new Van Halen album on which “Tattoo” will appear, A Different Kind of Truth, is the band’s first effort with David Lee Roth in twenty-eight years, so… yeah, there’s a lot of expectations to live up to.

And the band has acquitted themselves admirably — as a song, “Tattoo” might not blow your mind and make you jump up and down and squeal with joy, but it’s still really good, and does no shame to DLR-era VH’s legacy. Diamond Dave’s voice is in great shape, and that Eddie solo is top notch. I certainly dig “Tattoo” way more than I did either of the songs DLR recorded with the band back in ’96 (although Vince really likes those songs, so fuck do I know anyway?).

The video, on the other hand, is pretty lame. But I don’t think it really matters, given these specific circumstances.

A Different Kind of Truth comes out February 7 via Interscope; the band hits the road for a North American tour that same month. Get dates here.

-AR

With a new Van Halen single set to be released tomorrow, it seems like a good time to look back at the only two original songs the band recorded with David Lee Roth since 1984, “Me Wise Magic” and “Can’t Get This Stuff No More,” both of which appeared on 1996′s Best of Van Halen Volume 1 and thereafter caused the DLR/VH relationship to spontaneously combust. At the time, critics and fans alike questioned the band’s motives for the “Volume 1″ suffix, and we were kinda right to do so, weren’t we? Since then Warner Bros. and its affiliate labels have pushed out no fewer than 7 other different greatest hits / best of comps, but none of them have had any new songs; go figure.

So what of those two “new” songs from ’96? Axl already opined on them drawing the wrath of many an MS reader; Anso hasn’t told me what he thinks of them but he loves all VH unconditionally like his first teddy bear, so, ya know. Moi?

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So last night Van Halen played at Cafe Wha?, this incredibly small club (capacity is 250 people) here in NYC; alas, MetalSucks did not score an invitation, but, hey, that’s what cell phones are for. You can check out some footage from the show in the above video.

More exciting for the approximately eight trillion people who wanted to attend the show but couldn’t get in is that the band has now announced dates for their upcoming tour in support of their new David Lee Roth-reunion album, A Different Kind of Truth. Vince and I saw the band play Madison Square Garden in 2007, and to our surprise and delight, the show was AWESOME, so, yeah, I’m excited to go see them again, even if I have my reservations about them trying to follow-up 1984 twenty-eight years later. But Truth‘s first single, “Tattoo,” drops Tuesday, so we should have a better sense of twenty-first century Van Halen sounds then.

A Different Kind of Truth will come out February 7 via Interscope; dates for the band’s upcoming tour are after the jump.

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I got freaked out for a second when Van Halen no-showed for their rumored appearance at the Grammy noms party in late November. I was spooked by Hagar’s rumor-mongering and by the fact that these things can fall through. But I’m groovy now cuz over the holidays VH announced a 2012 tour (!) and a February 7 release date for their twelfth album (!!). Awesome!

Its title hasn’t been announced yet, but the good news is that the lead single comes out January 10, a tasty billboard went up in Times Square, and good vibes surround this promo clip of VH talking about the old days and this clip (scroll down a little) of Roth looking all fabulous while dancing or subdued and bearded with dog. And they’ve been rehearsing in secret over two months. That’s enough for me to trust this whole thing and thusly I am pumped for this tour! Think about it: These are the first shows since the invention of Fruit Roll-Ups where VH will play new material with David Lee Roth. Shit man!!

And while we’re talking setlist, I vote that VH specialify these shows even further by swapping out a few standards for some seldom-heard mega-jamz. I don’t endorse a vibe-killing focus on obscurities or a promoter-enraging set of only new stuff. Nothing radical. Just a few swaps of worn hits for some shit we’ve not heard in a while — like since said old days; I can think of a few deeper jamz that would be super-fun for everybody:

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The ink is barely dry on Van Halen’s new record deal with Interscope. So, of course, it’s time to start speculating about the actual contents of the band’s new record, which will be their first with David Lee Roth in almost three decades, and their first with Fatty Ding Dongs Van Halen ever. And who better to speculate than Sammy Hagar, a dude who hasn’t been in the band in six years and hasn’t recorded with them in sixteen?

Hagar has never been shy about discussing his old band (although, in his defense, it’s obviously difficult to be a former member of one the biggest acts in rock history and not get asked about that group on a regular basis), and in a new interview with  Rolling Stone, the current Chickenfoot singer reveals that while the new Van Halen album will contain material none of us have heard before, that doesn’t mean it’s actually new:

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I had shall we say a moment of clarity about Van Halen this week. It’s nothing bad and nobody’s fault. I love. To me, they score highest in all categories of awesomeness since The Beatles srs. And thusly, I think fans flex on lots of bullcrap. Like, no Michael Anthony? Uh okay. Your teen son in his place? If you say he’s cool, then cool. Shirtless in those white capris brah? Fuckin’ have to trust you on that, I will! And the super secret recording sessions? Fuck it! Like the song says, I’ll wait. Ditto for Aerosmith.

My, like, epiphany isn’t about something they’ve done that freaked me out. There exists no action to be undertaken by Van Halen that could disinterest me in their DLR-inclusive shit. But here I’ll reprise the headline as I explain the wake-up call I received the other day: Holy fuck Van Halen is old as all shit.

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Anyone who plays an instrument has moments of thanking Jeebus for all of his/her appendages & extremities.  So often we take for granted the simple inherent nature of having all (or most) of our natural human body parts and functions, and it can be rather inspiring to witness someone overcoming the odds and making good out of an undeniably tough situation.

Enter John Denner, who was born without a right hand but designed a makeshift picking device that enabled him to learn how to play the guitar.  And dude didn’t just simply learn how to play — he legitimately shreds!  Case in point:

I mean…….WTF???  Hats off to Denner.

Visit his website here.

TV news story and clips from Denner’s instructional DVD after the jomp…

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Don’t you love classic Van Halen? It’s amazing how that band’s music can just save your day. It’s been my go-to cure for post-American Idol misery; it’s Listerine for the ear, and a reminder of what true excellence sounds like. It’s Prozac for PISD (Post Idol Stress Disorder) and a reset button on any mood soured by three phony-ass judges slinging horseshit like stableboys late for a date. See, David Lee Roth and Eddie Van Halen can drown out even the echoes of judge Jennifer Lopez’s barbed whine as she pays lip service to “finding your voice” — yeah like she’s done with her wack new single about ballin’ up in da club, the dick-biting hack — and her more-than-occasional retorts to fellow judge Randy Jackson. (I don’t get that. She already had her turn, so like shut it, harpee!).

While we’re talking VH, can we all agree to end this silly farce already with the new bass player? I don’t give a fuck who he is; whether he’s Ed’s high school-aged son or fucking Jesus Christ, it is a side issue; Michael Anthony is Van Halen. His and Ed’s backing vocals absolutely jam on those records (like here), each of which is way better than what Idol judges can’t stop calling true creativity and great artistry. Those duo vox comprise, like, 35% of the band’s appeal, so the Van Halens should put that shit back together. We, the fans, declare amnesty; we want only what is right. Plus, if the young Van Halen is as brilliant as Ed thinks, he will earn his own chances. (Same goes for these “beautiful, perfect” Idol singers.) Van Halen just is not Wolfgang’s band. It’s Michael Anthony’s, the brothers’, and Dave’s. Period. Get Michael and pay him. And Ted Templeman too. That would counteract any and all effects of American Idol, cancerous shitpile of ear-AIDS.

Okay thanks for sticking around for paragraph #3, by which point I think we’ve established that thinking about/listening to the music of Van Halen is serving as a defense mechanism to prevent my re-living the mind-blowingly stupid, untrue nonsense spewed this week by Steven Tyler (the high preist of hooey), ‘Fer-‘Pez (SYFF), Randy Jackson (how much does it cost Idol to lease your honesty, dog?), guest fucktard Sheryl Crow (want a salt lick, girl?), and each blubbering, fam’ly-lovin’, Bin Laden-hatin’ individualist genius contestant who these days would happily agree to be shat on in exchange for the Idol crown. And because of the show’s near-total resistance to real, useful critique by “your Idol judges,” I’m counteracting this you’re-all-winners jive with a nudge upwards on my assholo-stat. So here comes your stabbiest Idol Remains shitcard ever! We measure in Danzigs ‘round here!

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Flip flops, the preferred summer season footwear of douche bags and date rapists everywhere, just got metallier: yesterday Van Halen unveiled a line of flips flops modeled on Eddie Van Halen’s famous “Frankenstein” guitars.

And they’re great, because not only are they way overpriced (thirty bucks a pair for what amounts to two pieces of foam and some string), but they feature the design right in the spot where your feet would go, so no one will ever really see it anyway. Unless you just, like, leave them on display in your home or something, in which case you are a loser.

If you’re part of the .00000001% of the population that somehow enjoys Van Halen and Dave Matthews in equal measure, feel free to purchase a pair of these here. You can also go get them at Urban Outfitters, if you prefer to waste your money while listening to irritating music.

No word on when matching Van Halen shirts with pre-upturned collars will be released.

-AR

[via Noisecreep]

Sammy Hagar is a goofy dude, but for the open-hearted, there’s still much about The Red Rocker to admire. As was discussed on Tuesday, he’s successful at everything, a fact that debunks the myth of Hagar’s brainlessness; also, the guy is a good sport who understands what happens when a proud drunk publicly swears to interaction with space aliens. It’s gonna cause some disbelief and ribbing.

But he’s cool with it and will even participate in his own mocking, like he did Tuesday night when starring in a dramatic interpretation on Jimmy Kimmel Live! of his late-night extraterrestrial encounter (above). This good humor, too, makes Hagar seem sharp, as though he learned a lesson from his former bandmate Eddie Van Halen’s toothless paranoia and lack of perspective. Shit, if Eddie went on Kimmel, he’d reenact a midnight meeting with a Wolfgang-shaped lamp.

–ADF

No guitar pedal is more well-known and widely used (or over-used if you’re Kirk Hammett) than the Cry Baby wah-wah. If you’ve got some time, dig into this new hour-long documentary on the Wah that started it all and its lasting effect on music, which our Brohemoths at Metal Injection posted over the weekend. Interviews with Eddie Van Halen, Jerry Cantrell, Slash, Kirk Hammett and Zakk Wylde should make it interesting for staunch metalheads while interviews with dozens of other guitar luminaries will delight your inner guitar-nerd.

Oh, what’s that? You’re not made of time? Make sure you at least watch the 2-minute intro sequence in which grown men do their best to vocally imitate the sound of the pedal. Because nothing says “metal” like a 65 year-old dude making funny noises with his mouth. Also, Eddie Van Halen officially sounds like he’s 153 years old.

After the jump, the official description of the documentary:

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One my least popular observations is that Eddie Van Halen’s progress as a guitar soloist was temporarily stunted by the wave of gooey acclaim that soaked him as early as 1978. Until the 1984 album, the newly 56-year old axeman seemed more focussed on wizardry and novel tricks than on crafting memorable solo passages, notwithstanding “Somebody Get Me A Doctor.” His skillz were always bonkers, but apparently good judgement arrived with the keyboards; that’s when he proceeded to rail off beautious leads to equal his unmatched chord choices and phrasing. Then came F.U.C.K., Balance, the departure of Sammy Hagar, the whole Gary Cherone thing, dementia, divorce, marriage, a reconciliation with singer David Lee Roth, a deconciliation with bassist Michael Anthony, the enlistment of Wolfgang “FD-D” Van Halen, and finally Thursday, the happiest day of my adult life thanks to producer John Shanks’ twitter:

Here we go kids … VH.

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Eddie Van Halen rage stories are pretty legendary, but I’d thought that Mr. EVH had calmed down in recent years. Not so according to Shinedown singer Brent Smith, who toured with Van Hagar in 2004 and became chummy with the OG shredder before a little backstage incident set him off and re-ignited the raging dickitude of old. Good to know that the old man’s still got some vinegar (and piss) in ‘im.

The clip comes from MTV’s new self-described “dude blog” called Clutch in which the goal I suppose is to be a modern-day online Maxim full of stories about hot chicks, sports, and other silly dudebro shit. Like Shinedown or hate ‘em (I happen to love ‘em!), Brent Smith does an excellent job telling the story. I won’t ruin it for you.

-VN

Fucking publicists.

Last month a story started going around that there was a new Van Halen album in the works for 2011, the first complete record to feature David Lee Roth since 1984′s, uh, 1984; then the band’s publicist/Eddie Van Halen’s wife, Janie Van Halen, called the new album “rumors” and said “I don’t have any updates at this time.” I said at that point that JVH might be “completely full of shit,” and as it turns out, she was. From The Hollywood Reporter:

“…a recent release announcing a re-upped deal between publisher Warner/Chappell and Eddie and Alex Van Halen stated that the band ‘is currently in the studio recording an album with Roth that is due for release in 2011.’”

So, there you have it. Unless someone at Warner really fucked up when writing that press release, there is very much going to be a new Van Halen album next year.

Celebrate or weep in the comments section below.

-AR

Thanks: Mick Stingley

So, yeah, it turns out there’s a burgeoning metal scene in Maldives, and we even know some peeps who have either worked there or may work there in the future. Does that mean we’ll take a vacation there soon? Fuck do we look like, Wes Borland?

Here’s some other shit that happened this week:

• We were re-joined by some old friends: Porn star Bobbi Starr talked about the world’s most metal porn, and Dallas Coyle pondered the road to happiness.
• We debuted an exclusive excerpt from Dave Mustaine’s memoirs, and are giving you a chance to meet the man himself.
• We spoke to Woody Weatherman from C.O.C. and Roxana Shirazi, author of The Last Living Slut.
• We checked out new releases by Clutch and The Acacia Strain and I Declare War.
• Sergeant D. taught us about the history of slam.
• We defended Eddie Van Halen from Dave Davies.
• We climbed a Wall of Douche.
• We met The Crud Wizard…
• …who is infinitely cooler than the dude from ICP’s ree-ree son.
• Also, BON JOVI + BOOBIES!!!

Okay. Gonna go to an awesome Cynic show now. Lates.

-AR

I could have sworn that when I was a kid I read somewhere that The Kinks had no problem with Van Halen’s cover of “You Really Got Me,” and, in fact, thought it superior to their own version. But I can’t remember where I read it (I’m assuming a full-color glossy crap magazine), I can’t find the quote online, and it was probably all propaganda, the way pretty much everything in magazines like Hit Parader and Circus was propaganda. (And the Gerri Miller years of Metal Edge weren’t exactly a bastion of journalistic integrity, either.)

And so here we are, decades after the fact, and The Kinks’ Dave Davies is bitching about the cover, telling Classic Rock that “I’m sure Eddie Van Halen played better when he was drunk,” and that VH’s version of the song “was very Middle America. It was like, ‘Hey man, look at me with my tight trousers! Here’s our version of You Really Got Me!’”

And if you’re wondering what crawled up Davies’ ass, well, the next part of his quote is actually very telling:

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Since its inception by the typings of some clever music journalist in the 80s, the categorization “hair metal” (or “glam metal”) has been as amorphous and, consequently, as misused as “metalcore” has been in the aughties. And since it’s hair metal week here on MetalSucks, we thought we’d try to address this issue by pointing the spotlight on ten bands that are often, and incorrectly, deemed “hair metal.” And to that end…

If Van Halen set the standard for the flashy guitar techniques and outrageous frontman theatrics that would later come to define hair metal, then it’s only fair to call Extreme their proverbial nephews and similarly disrobe them of the “hair metal” tag. At their peak more than a full decade after EVH and DLR changed the face of heavy music forever, the Boston duo of Gary Cherone on vocals and wunkerkind Nuno Bettencourt on guitar channeled the vintage feel-good VH vibes into three killer albums that still stand up today. Nuno’s unabashed EVH worship was on display at all times both in his supersonic leads and intricately voiced, highly rhythmic rhythms — I suppose one could argue that he stylistically one-upped EVH and took everything he’d done to the next level, but I don’t think I’m gonna go there — and Cherone, though not as outrageous as David Lee Roth, certainly summoned his whacky / feel good on-stage personality, and not for nothin’ was definitely a better vocalist. And of course there’s that little thing where Cherone sang for Van Halen for a minute… but we don’t talk about that.

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Since its inception by the typings of some clever music journalist in the 80s, the categorization “hair metal” (or “glam metal”) has been as amorphous and, consequently, as misused as “metalcore” has been in the aughties. And since it’s hair metal week here on MetalSucks, we thought we’d try to address this issue by pointing the spotlight on ten bands that are often, and incorrectly, deemed “hair metal.” And to that end…

It’s easy for me to understand why some people would dub Van Halen “hair metal.” Between the Van Halen brothers and David Lee Roth’s chest/Michael Anthony’s back and arms, the band certainly had plenty of hair on-stage in their heyday. (Things changed in the reunion era, as Eddie, Alex, and Diamon Dave have all adopted more “adult” hair cuts, and Michael Anthony’s back has been replaced by Fatty Ding Dongs Van Halen’s almost-grassless playing field.) And, certainly, no band besides Kiss was more influential on the hair metal scene — for what were the glam bands if not just one long string of EVH and DLR impersonators?

And yet it is this very influence which disqualifies Van Halen from being categorized as a hair metal band — for how can they be part of a trend that they pre-dated? Call Van Halen “cock rock” and I’d be hard pressed to argue, but a bunch of Aqua Net lovin’ pretty boys Van Halen were not.

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